Hold The Mother

In this podcast episode, Joyella shares her journey through new motherhood, deeply influenced by her own experiences of being parented and her childhood trauma. She recounts the challenges of being raised by a young, single mother with limited support and how this has shaped her approach to parenting her two-year-old son differently. We talked about the complexities of managing and understanding our own triggers, the process of self-awareness and healing, and how Joyella navigates maintaining a relationship with her mother now. I'm really passionate about understanding intergenerational trauma so this episode is a beautiful example of how we can experience trauma and work through it for ourselves and our children.Episode highlights:02:01 Joyella's Childhood and Its Impact04:24 Differences in Parenting Between Siblings12:17 Navigating Motherhood with a Traumatic Past17:59 Strategies for Managing Parental Triggers20:40 The Importance of Rupture and Repair in Parenting25:10 Reflecting on Intergenerational TraumaIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

Today I chat with Siti about the complexities of childhood trauma. She shares personal experiences and reflections on how various forms of childhood trauma, including emotional neglect, criticism, and lack of acceptance, have impacted her life into adulthood. We delve into the nuanced ways trauma manifests in behaviours, relationships, and self-perception, discussing the fear of rejection, the struggle with self-image, and the challenge of expressing emotions properly.This is a great episode to listen to if you're wondering how your childhood may have affected you.Episode highlights:11:43 Impact of Childhood Experiences on Adult Relationships11:58 Dealing with Emotional Expression and Anger18:12 Navigating Work and Personal Life Influenced by Childhood Trauma22:36 The Role of Therapy in Addressing Childhood Trauma31:54 Reflecting on the Impact of Cultural and Societal NormsIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

Today's episode is all about the concept of 'mum rage,' which is characterised by intense, often inexplicable anger experienced by mothers. I unpack the two typical primary reasons behind mum rage: unmet needs and triggers of past experiences.Unmet needs can stem from the demands of childcare, work, and household management, leading to feelings of depletion and isolation. Conversely, certain situations in motherhood might reactivate unresolved feelings from the your past, intensifying your emotional response. I hope this sheds light on the importance of recognising the roots of mum rage, addressing unmet needs through support and delegation, and exploring therapeutic options for processing past traumas.Episode highlights:05:17 The Impact of Social Support and Modern Motherhood08:28 Workplace Challenges for Mothers10:51 The Emotional Toll of Motherhood and Strategies for Coping18:52 Identifying and Managing Triggers of Mum RageUseful Links:The Self-Soothing Series - Safety Bubble ExerciseThe Self-Soothing Series - Using Your ImaginationThe Self-Soothing Series - VisualisationFree Trigger Log WorksheetIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

Today I want to talk about the complexities of navigating Mother's Day for people who have experienced childhood trauma, specifically abuse or neglect from their mothers.My hope for you is that this episode will give you the confidence to engage with Mother's Day the way you need to, challenging societal expectations and the pressure to conform to normative expressions of appreciation, like sending cards or gifts.Episode highlights:05:18 Understanding the Dynamics of Trauma and Motherhood14:14 Navigating Your Feelings and Decisions on Mother's Day17:21 Reflecting on the Complexity of Motherhood and RespectIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

When I had my children I had no idea what 'The Fourth Trimester' was but learning about it has been so important for me and my clients. And I hope it will be as affirming for you too. The fourth trimester, which is first three months post-pregnancy, is such a significant time for mother and child to bond and adjust to their new roles.What I know to be true is the need for emotional and practical support in the fourth trimester and in this episode I share my gentle approach to dealing with postnatal recovery in the hopes it will help you in your journey. Let me know what you think :)Episode highlights: 00:30 Understanding the Importance of the Fourth Trimester03:29 The Impact of the Fourth Trimester on the Family05:13 How to Support Someone in the Fourth Trimester09:26 Practical Ways to Support New Parents12:17 The Importance of Rest in the Fourth TrimesterIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

Welcome to the latest episode of the Hold the Mother podcast. I'm Laura Hans, your host and perinatal psychotherapist, and today we're diving into the world of maternal mental health.In this episode, I'm really excited to chat with you about something super important – how we can tackle those toxic thoughts that often creep into our minds. You know, the ones that mess with our emotions and actions? Yeah, those. We're going to unpack it all!We'll be talking about Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) – breaking down the myths, exploring how it works, and getting into the detail of challenging negative thinking patterns. Spoiler alert: thoughts are not facts! They're more like biased opinions, and I've got some useful CBT techniques, like catch, challenge, and change, to help you question those thoughts and see things from a more balanced perspective. And if you're looking for some extra guidance, I've got a book recommendation for you – 'CBT for Dummies' by Rena Branch.Episode highlights: 02:07 Myths about positive thinking03:46 How thoughts pull the strings of our emotions and behaviours06:51 The Three C's: Catch, Challenge, Change10:21 Unpacking unhelpful thinking styles17:45 Tips for changing thoughts in a practical waySo grab your headphones, get comfy, and let's chat about nurturing that mental health of yours. Can't wait for you to join me on this journey.If you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

This week, I delve into the concept of self compassion in motherhood and why it's so important in building resilience, reducing anxiety and depression and, ultimately, helping children model self compassion for themselves.As ever, I share personal experiences and insights, along with practical tips on how self compassion can be cultivated and maintained.Episode highlights: 00:48 Understanding Self-Compassion03:33 The Benefits of Self-Compassion08:15 Modelling Self-Compassion for Children15:54 The Inner Critic and Self-CompassionReferenced in the episode: Episode 7 - Improving Self-Esteem In MotherhoodLearning To Love Yourself Free Guide

In this episode of 'Hold the Mother', I discuss what to consider when therapy isn't working. I explore signs of ineffective therapy, reasons it might not be working, and what you can do about it. I emphasise the importance of finding the right type of therapy, the appropriate mode of delivery, and a therapist that you connect with. And I also explain the benefits of a versatile therapist skilled in different modalities.  Episode highlights: 01:17 Understanding Different Therapy Modalities02:04 Recognising Signs of Ineffective Therapy13:35 The Role of Therapist-Client Relationship13:35 The Importance of Therapist Selection19:52 The Benefits of a Tiered Approach in TherapyIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.

I am trained in both Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR). The beauty of this is that I can draw upon each of the modalities at different points in your therapy journey. What I use and when will depend on your treatment needs and goals. This podcast episode explores how to choose the right therapy in more detail…Episode highlights: What is CBT?What is EMDR?What are the main similarities and differences between CBT and EMDR Therapy?How to choose the right therapy for youWhat Is EMDR Therapy Podcast EpisodeIf you enjoyed this episode, please share with anyone you think would also enjoy it, and subscribe so you are notified as soon as I release a new episode. And if you'd like to learn more about me and how I can support you, click here! You can also follow me on Instagram.