The Beauty in the Mess

In this gripping and courageous episode, Michele talks with Mia Hanks, a survivor of 29 years of covert narcissistic abuse. Now an author and advocate, Mia opens up about the subtle manipulation, control, and emotional gaslighting that kept her trapped in an invisible prison for nearly three decades.Through her memoir Bride Made and her growing public platform, Mia is shining a light on what so many silently endure, and showing that freedom and healing are possible. Whether you’ve been through something similar or want to better understand and support someone who has, this conversation will stay with you.[02:20] – Mia shares her story: 29 years married to a covert narcissist [04:40] – What narcissistic abuse really looks like (and why it’s misunderstood) [07:10] – How narcissism develops and why lack of empathy is the red flag [09:30] – Total control: from finances to sleep and time [12:00] – Why covert narcissists are the hardest to spot — and most dangerous [14:30] – Can narcissists change? And why most don’t [17:00] – The silent weapon of gaslighting and how it erodes self-trust [19:45] – How abuse affects children and family dynamics [22:10] – When physical symptoms show up from emotional stress [24:40] – Is it narcissism, sociopathy, or something worse? [27:00] – Why victims normalize abuse — and how to begin seeing clearly [29:30] – Preparing to leave: finances, fear, and finding support [32:00] – Mia’s exit strategy: what worked and what she wishes she knew [34:40] – What helped most in healing: therapy, writing, and sharing [37:10] – Learning to trust again, set boundaries, and rebuild self-worth [39:50] – How covert narcissists protect their image through smear campaigns [42:20] – Writing her memoir Bride Made — and why it’s not just for survivors [44:40] – Final message: you’re not stuck — there’s life and healing after abuse🔗 Connect with Mia Hanks:Website: miajhanks.comMemoir: Bride Made (available everywhere books are sold)Instagram: @mia.j.hanksBlog coming soonBride Made: A Memoir is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target, Walmart, and more.📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this episode helped you feel seen or sparked something new, share it with someone who needs it. You’re not alone — and you’re never too far gone to begin again. #TheBeautyInTheMess #MiaHanks #NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #BrideMade #CovertNarcissism #Gaslighting #EmotionalHealing #WomensVoices 💬 Rate & Review·        Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele sits down with Dr. Mark A. Hicks, counselor, speaker, and author of Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last. With decades of experience in psychology, divinity, and human relationships, Dr. Hicks offers real, accessible guidance on how to truly love, starting with yourself.He shares his personal story of loss and renewal, along with a five-part framework for building stronger, healthier, more fulfilling connections — whether with your partner, kids, friends, or even coworkers. This conversation is heartfelt, deeply relatable, and filled with tools for anyone who’s ever wondered: “Can I really learn to love well… even after the mess?”[02:20] – Meet Dr. Mark Hicks and what led him to write Learning Love [05:40] – Why love is a skill, not just a feeling [09:10] – His five components of learning love (G.E.A.P.P.) [12:30] – Why grief is the starting point for healthy connection [15:45] – Understanding emotional literacy and why it matters [19:10] – How practical love helps relationships last [22:25] – The role of acceptance in healing relationships [25:30] – Passion isn’t about fireworks — it’s about presence [28:40] – “You can’t love someone more than you love yourself” [32:15] – How your self-talk shapes your relationships [35:30] – What healthy love looks like in parenting [38:50] – Loving again after loss, betrayal, or divorce [42:00] – Why love isn’t reserved for the lucky — it’s for the willing [45:10] – Final thoughts: You are worthy of learning love🔗 Connect with Dr. Mark A. Hicks:📘 Book: Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last💻 Website: drmarkahicks.com📸 Instagram: @drmarkahicks💬 Facebook: Mark Hicks – Learning Love📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this episode resonated, don’t forget to follow, review, and share. Love is a journey — and you don’t have to walk it alone.#TheBeautyInTheMess #LearningLove #MarkAHicks #SelfWorth #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalHealth #HealingAfterHeartbreak #RelationshipTools💬 Rate & Review·        Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess, Michele talks with Erica Wiederlight, confidence coach, embodiment expert, and founder of We The Light, LLC. Erica helps women go from disconnected and burned out to fully present, joyful, and confident — not through pressure or perfection, but through presence and pleasure. Erica shares how self-love can start in the middle of chaos, how pleasure is about so much more than sex, and why micro-moments of embodiment might be the most healing practice we have. Her message is loud and clear: You don’t have to be fixed to be fabulous — you just have to start where you are. [02:30] – Meet Erica Wiederlight and how her “mess” led to her mission [06:00] – From performer to coach: what burnout revealed [09:15] – What embodiment really means — and why it matters[12:30] – Why pleasure isn’t selfish and how it heals[15:45] – Micro-moments of self-connection (yes, even with kids screaming in the back)[18:15] – You don’t need a retreat to feel worthy — you just need a breath[21:30] – Erica’s favorite tools to calm the nervous system and get present[25:00] – The truth about confidence (it’s not about being loud or perfect)[28:30] – Embodiment and healing when you’re burned out and tired[31:45] – How to stop waiting for permission and take up space[35:00] – Final thoughts on starting small, practicing daily, and trusting yourself 📚 Connect with Erica:Website: wethelight.orgInstagram: @wethelight_llcPodcast: Welcome to the Wiederlife📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community💬 Rate & Review·        Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

In this episode, Michele sits down with Utkarsh Narang, an executive coach, TEDx speaker, and founder of Ignited Neurons, for a deep, honest conversation about identity, fear, and fulfillment. With a background encompassing physiotherapy, content creation, and startup leadership, Utkarsh has lived many lives, and each reinvention taught him how to strip away false identities and show up with intentionality. Now, he helps others do the same. This episode explores what it means to live aligned with your values, how to embrace fear as a guidepost, and why presence — not perfection — is the most powerful discipline of all. [02:05] – Intro to Utkarsh: From physiotherapist to executive coach[06:10] – Letting go of your job title and rediscovering who you really are[10:25] – When discomfort becomes the doorway to growth[14:45] – Fear as fuel: how Utkarsh reframed anxiety into action[18:00] – The “last lunch” metaphor: living each moment like it matters[21:35] – The five values that anchor Utkarsh’s life and work[25:00] – Real discipline vs. performative motivation[29:15] – The trap of chasing goals without checking alignment[32:40] – How presence outperforms pressure every time[36:10] – Journaling, parenting, and practicing what you teach[39:45] – Why most people avoid stillness — and how to embrace it[43:20] – Redefining success: from impact to intention 🔗 Connect with Utkarsh Narang:🌐 Website: ignitedneurons.com📸 Instagram: @ignitedneurons💼 LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/utkarsh-narang🎥 YouTube: Ignited Neurons Channel 🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/       💬 Rate & Review       Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, host Michele is joined by Saril Vasquez, a triple-certified functional medicine practitioner and the founder of Belle Organix and the Bellechanics Method.After a decade of struggling with hair loss and being told there was no cure, Saril discovered something deeper: her body was trying to speak — and hair loss was the message. The solution wasn’t in prescriptions or topicals, but in identifying the root dysfunctions and restoring her system naturally.Now, Saril helps women around the world reverse hair loss through detoxification, gut healing, hormone balance, and personalized nutrition. This conversation will challenge everything you thought you knew about hair loss, and offer real hope for those who’ve been told “this is just how it is.”[02:30] – Meet Saril: Her personal journey with hair loss and functional medicine[05:30] – Why toxins, hormone imbalances, and scar tissue are major root causes[08:45] – Hair loss as a detox mechanism: what your body is trying to say[11:15] – Estrogen dominance, liver health, and the surprising role of bowel movements[14:30] – Breakups, birth control, and the emotional spark that led to healing[17:45] – Scar tissue: how it strangles follicles and how to reverse it[21:00] – Functional medicine vs. conventional approaches to alopecia[24:15] – Why your hair follicles likely aren’t “dead” — just buried under dysfunction[27:30] – How stress and sugar instantly impact hair health[30:45] – The five non-negotiables for reversing hair loss naturally[34:00] – How Saril supports balance without perfection[37:30] – Why no two women get the same plan[41:00] – The power of group coaching and real-life results[44:15] – Why castor oil on the liver beats castor oil on the scalp[47:30] – Busting the “it’s just genetics” myth[50:00] – What every woman should know about her body and healing🔗 Connect with Saril Vasquez: Website: bellechanics.com Free Book: Becoming a Bellechanic Take the Quiz: bellechanics.com/quiz Facebook Group: Reversing Hair Loss Naturally Instagram: @bellechanics Testimonials & Before/After: bellechanics.com/testimonials🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty in the Mess: Website: thebeautyinthemess.com Facebook Group: Join the Community LinkedIn: Michele Simms Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess

What if the version of success you’ve been chasing… was never really yours?In this powerful episode of The Beauty In The Mess, host Michele sits down with Nina Zapala — award-winning hospitality professional, speaker, author, and the creator of Spiritual Personality Typing — a modern, mystical reimagining of traditional personality systems.After decades in high-powered branding and luxury travel, Nina had what she calls a “life tsunami.” Everything fell apart — and yet, everything began. Her breakdown became a breakthrough, one that led her to help women rediscover the WHO of who they really are: not society’s version, but their real, unfiltered self.Together, we explore:How burnout may be your soul’s signal to realignWhy fulfillment leads to purpose — not the other way aroundThe surprising way your personality type holds spiritual wisdomWhat it means to follow your “North Star” trait and finally feel at home in yourselfWith humor, heart, and so much truth, Nina invites us to slow down, tune in, and stop outsourcing our answers. If you’ve ever wondered who you really are beneath the hustle — this conversation is for you. [02:40] – Meet Nina Zapala [06:00] – The onstage moment that sparked a total life unraveling [10:15] – Why “success” didn’t feel like success — and what came next [14:30] – What is Spiritual Personality Typing, and how is it different? [18:50] – The "North Star trait" and why it matters more than dominance [24:00] – Hearing your soul’s whispers vs. your ego’s demands [29:10] – How your personality shows up in travel, relationships, and resistance [34:30] – The myths of authenticity and the truth about fulfillment [38:45] – Learning to trust yourself — even when no one else gets it [43:00] – Women, aging, and being unapologetically audacious [47:20] – Nina’s book Unpack Your Personality and how travel can reveal the real you[52:00] – Everyday steps to reconnect with your inner voice[56:30] – Final thoughts: You’re not broken — you’re buried under conditioning 🔗 Connect with Nina ZapalaWebsite: https://www.ninazapala.comBook: Unpack Your Personality: Let Your Inner Guide Be Your Travel Guide Nina’s rescued poodle: Oliver (yes, he gets a shoutout!) Learn more about Spiritual Personality Typing on Nina’s blog🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/·        💬 Rate & Review·        Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

What if stepping into a boxing ring wasn’t about fighting — but about healing?In this powerful conversation, host Michele sits down with coach, speaker, personal trainer, and podcaster Tiffanee Cook to unpack how boxing — an intense, physical sport — became the unlikely catalyst for emotional healing and deep self-awareness. Tiffanee opens up about childhood trauma, identity, the power of boundaries, and how vulnerability became her true strength — inside and outside the ring. [02:35] – Introduction to Tiffanee and her unexpected journey into boxing[06:30] – The first boxing match: adrenaline, ego, and awakening[10:00] – How boxing unearthed long-buried childhood trauma[13:45] – The emotional safety of the ring: boundaries, honesty, and self-reliance[18:00] – Dissociation, emotional armor, and reconnecting with feeling[24:00] – Therapy, vulnerability, and the internal shift that changed everything[31:00] – Podcasting as a second “ring” for healing and self-expression[38:20] – Identity, reinvention, and choosing who you want to become[44:10] – People-pleasing, self-awareness, and how trauma shapes behavior[51:00] – Growth, community, and the courage to change your narrative[57:30] – What self-love really means and why naivety can be a gift[1:01:00] – Closing thoughts: choosing your story, healing through passion🔗 Connect with Tiffanee CookWebsite: https://www.tiffcook.comPodcast: Roll With the Punches🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/      💬 Rate & Review        Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!

In this powerful episode, Michele sits down with Ryan Skinner—financial professional, coach, and former heroin addict—who opens up about his journey through addiction, recovery, spiritual transformation, and fatherhood. From rock bottom to building a thriving business and becoming a devoted single dad to a daughter with autism, Ryan’s story is brutally honest, deeply human, and wildly inspiring. He shares how systems, service, and spirituality became the cornerstones of his success—and why mindset matters more than money.When Ryan’s not podcasting, he's diligently working as a retirement specialist. Ryan helps clients to preserve their nest egg and create reliable retirement income. Since he began his career helping others develop strategies to address their financial concerns, he has understood that every person is unique.   [02:23] – Meet Ryan[03:23] – The Spiral Into Addiction[04:23] – The Power of People[06:23] – Staying Sober[08:23] – That Voice in Your Head[11:23] – His Morning System[13:23] – Single Dad Life[16:23] – Rock Bottom & Redemption[19:23] – Rebuilding with Intention[22:23] – Social Media Detox[25:23] – Coaching Others[29:23] – Addiction Advice[33:23] – Cracking the Code[36:23] – Real Success[39:23] – Final Reflections🔗 Connect with Ryan SkinnerPodcast: Cracking The CodeWebsite: https://crackingthecodewithryanskinner.com/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@crackingthecodewithryanInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/crackingthecodewithryanskinnerYouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaep2AwIS8U36-X1OyCKuIgFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/ryansskinner/🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/

[02:10] – Welcome & IntroductionAmy’s background: From engineering to fitness coach.Her early passion for health and fitness.[05:10] – Taking the Leap into FitnessHow a Jack Canfield book sparked her new path.[09:10] – The Shift Women Over 50 Must MakeWhy traditional workouts stop working.The hidden dangers of over-exercising.[12:40] – Strength Training vs. CardioThe role of estrogen in muscle loss.Why long cardio may sabotage progress.[15:10] – Amy’s Weekly Fitness Formula2 full-body strength days (Mon/Fri)Optional core or light strength day (Wed)Cardio and fun movement (Tue/Thu/Sat)Sunday = recovery + mobility[19:10] – Adapting to Menopause & Hormone ShiftsAmy’s experience with HRT and breast cancer.How lack of estrogen impacts joints, energy, and recovery.Motion is lotion, but recovery is key.[23:10] – Common Midlife Joint IssuesThe difference between joint pain and injury.Strengthening knees and shoulders safely.When to rest and when to move through discomfort.[28:10] – Balance, Flexibility & PostureSimple ways to train agility and coordination.[33:10] – Nutrition: 80% of the EquationWhy Amy never tells anyone to exercise to lose weight.The surprising impact of sugar on inflammation.[38:10] – Building Motivation & Creating HabitsHow to get unstuck: Amy’s “5 Minutes for 5 Days” trick.Creating a strong “why” and personal motivation statement.[43:10] – Advice for BeginnersStart with walking.Bodyweight movement and chair exercises as entry points.How to layer in resistance safely over time.[48:10] – Can You Exercise Your Face?Amy’s honest take on face yoga and red-light masks. [50:10] – Be Healthy Enough: Amy’s MissionWhat you’ll find in her membership and on social.Free YouTube workouts, challenges, and more.[52:10] – Final ThoughtsTrust your body and your intuition.Be your own health advocate.Aging well is about independence, not aesthetics.🔗 Connect with Amy Van LiewWebsite: https://behealthyenough.comYouTube: Be Healthy EnoughInstagram: @behealthyenoughTikTok: @behealthyenough🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess