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Ep. 110 What If The Person You Loved Most Was The One Quietly Erasing You with Mia Hanks
Season 4, Ep. 110
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In this gripping and courageous episode, Michele talks with Mia Hanks, a survivor of 29 years of covert narcissistic abuse. Now an author and advocate, Mia opens up about the subtle manipulation, control, and emotional gaslighting that kept her trapped in an invisible prison for nearly three decades.
Through her memoir Bride Made and her growing public platform, Mia is shining a light on what so many silently endure, and showing that freedom and healing are possible. Whether you’ve been through something similar or want to better understand and support someone who has, this conversation will stay with you.
[02:20] – Mia shares her story: 29 years married to a covert narcissist
[04:40] – What narcissistic abuse really looks like (and why it’s misunderstood)
[07:10] – How narcissism develops and why lack of empathy is the red flag
[09:30] – Total control: from finances to sleep and time
[12:00] – Why covert narcissists are the hardest to spot — and most dangerous
[14:30] – Can narcissists change? And why most don’t
[17:00] – The silent weapon of gaslighting and how it erodes self-trust
[19:45] – How abuse affects children and family dynamics
[22:10] – When physical symptoms show up from emotional stress
[24:40] – Is it narcissism, sociopathy, or something worse?
[27:00] – Why victims normalize abuse — and how to begin seeing clearly
[29:30] – Preparing to leave: finances, fear, and finding support
[32:00] – Mia’s exit strategy: what worked and what she wishes she knew
[34:40] – What helped most in healing: therapy, writing, and sharing
[37:10] – Learning to trust again, set boundaries, and rebuild self-worth
[39:50] – How covert narcissists protect their image through smear campaigns
[42:20] – Writing her memoir Bride Made — and why it’s not just for survivors
[44:40] – Final message: you’re not stuck — there’s life and healing after abuse
🔗 Connect with Mia Hanks:
- Website: miajhanks.com
- Memoir: Bride Made (available everywhere books are sold)
- Instagram: @mia.j.hanks
- Blog coming soon
- Bride Made: A Memoir is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target, Walmart, and more.
📱 Connect with Michele Simms:
- Website: thebeautyinthemess.com
- Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess
- Facebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community
🎧 If this episode helped you feel seen or sparked something new, share it with someone who needs it. You’re not alone — and you’re never too far gone to begin again.
#TheBeautyInTheMess #MiaHanks #NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #BrideMade #CovertNarcissism #Gaslighting #EmotionalHealing #WomensVoices
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