Need A Lift? with Tim Shriver

What happens when life gives you a second chance? For Steve Avalos, this question isn’t hypothetical but the difference between repeating a cycle of violence or breaking free from it. Growing up in Los Angeles, which has been referred to as “the gang capital of the world,”  Steve was surrounded by generational gang life. His parents, brothers, cousins, aunts, and uncles were all affiliated and by age 17, Steve was sentenced to life in prison.Throughout all this, Steve’s Roman Catholic faith remained a huge part of his life. Even when he was what he calls just “a believer and not a follower,” he witnessed the presence and power of God in his life. His faith, paired with unexpected guides along the way, helped him find a path forward. After serving 17 years, Steve found himself walking out of prison into a new life as a devoted husband and father of four, a community leader at Homeboy Industries (the world’s largest gang intervention, rehabilitation, and reentry program), and a graduate student (Steve is currently earning a master’s degree in theology). In this conversation, he talks to Tim about what it took to transform his life, the moment his faith became real, and the unexpected power of being truly seen. “Homeboy Industries never gives up on you.” Steve says, “The last is first there. If you got tattoos, you have a violent record, you've never had a job, you're on parole, you're on probation –odds are you wouldn't be hired somewhere else, and if you are, you might be the last one picked. At Homeboy Industries, you're the first one picked… we love you until you start to love yourself.” ***Steve Avalos is the VP of Operations at Homeboy Industries, the world's largest gang intervention, rehabilitation, and reentry program. Founded in East Los Angeles by Father Greg Boyle in the late 1980s, Homeboy Industries has changed the lives of almost 8,000 people (and counting!) many of whom have been impacted by gang violence.Steve is currently pursuing his Master's in Theology at Loyola Marymount University and he’s a father of four and a devoted husband.Learn more about Steve's work with Homeboy Industries on their website, HomeboyIndustries.org. ***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

Ever since she was a kid, singer-songwriter Jewel has taken a methodical approach to her own happiness. As a teenager, she moved out of her abusive household with one mission: “My goal was to learn if happiness was a learnable skill,” she tells Tim. “If it wasn't taught in your household, could it still be taught?”Jewel says her practical attitude helped her stay mentally healthy and successful in a creative field as chaotic as the music industry. In her thirties, she began to wonder if her anxiety was a feature rather than a bug, considering just how many other people struggle with the same problem. “I don't think… God was like, ‘Oops, sorry humanity,’” she says. “‘Just a little default flaw there.’” She discovered that if she paid attention, she could track which trigger was making her feel anxious, and learn from that feeling rather than avoiding it. “I stopped trying to disassociate from anxiety and started to get into relationship with my anxiety,” she says. In addition to her successful career as a musician, Jewel is also a mental health advocate and co-founder of the Inspiring Children Foundation, which connects kids who might not be able to afford traditional therapy with mental health resources and curriculum. “My life changed by these little habits that I learned to develop,” she says. “And I wanted to see if they could work for other kids like me that fell through the cracks.”***Jewel is a Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter and performer of hit songs like “Who Will Save Your Soul” and “You Were Meant for Me.” She’s a mental health advocate and co-founder of the Inspiring Children Foundation. You can learn more about her work at her website jeweljk.com, and on her social media, @jewel. ***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

Growing up in Dewey, Oklahoma, Tanner Ray never felt like he fit in. In his small rural town, Tanner says he was “kind of the weird artsy kid” who aspired to become a documentary filmmaker. After graduating high school, he briefly achieved his dreams of traveling the country. But at 18, when financial problems led him back to Oklahoma, he realized that many of his friends from high school had moved away. “They all were starting their lives,” he says. “And there was just me… I felt very isolated and lonely.”He decided to approach this problem in his own unique way: by creating a documentary about making new friends. Tanner’s short doc, “An Oklahoma Summer”, chronicles his struggle to connect and how the new friends he makes teach him to make the most of every moment, by going on adventures like ghost hunting, horseback riding, and shopping cart racing. “I was having so much fun in this place that I resented my whole life,” Tanner tells Tim. “The whole time I was focused on leaving, I was missing this… adventure unfolding like right before me.” ***Tanner Ray is a documentary filmmaker currently based in Oklahoma. You can find his short films like “An Oklahoma Summer” on his YouTube channel, @WickedStew. You can also see his work on TikTok and Instagram.***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound. 

What does it really take to succeed—not just in school, but in life? David Adams believes the answer isn’t our intelligence or talent but our ability to control our emotions. Back in high school, he noticed a surprising link between cross-country runners and top students: enduring discomfort and delaying gratification led to their overall success because it built resilience. David says, “One of the things I think we've gotten a little bit wrong is that we've stopped exposing students and young people to hard things because it makes them feel bad. It’s okay to feel bad.”As CEO of Urban Assembly, a network of 20 New York City public high schools that incorporates Social and Emotional Learning (SEL) in their curriculum, David’s mission is to ensure kids get the best education possible by learning how to effectively manage their feelings and relationships. In this practice episode, Tim and David dive deep into the power of SEL and emotional intelligence—what they are, why they matter, and how they can transform the way we navigate our lives. Through engaging stories from his personal life and work as an educator, David challenges the idea that feelings should dictate our actions, emphasizing instead the importance of pausing, reflecting, and aligning our emotions with our goals. "Feeling is not the same thing as being. We can feel things and not necessarily have to act on those feelings...When we create space between feeling and doing," David explains, "We give ourselves the chance to make better decisions."***David Adams is an award-winning educator and author of The Educator's Practical Guide to Emotional Intelligence. As CEO of Urban Assembly, a network of 20 NYC public high schools incorporating social and emotional learning in their curriculum, he helps kids thrive by learning how to manage their feelings. As a husband and a father to two young boys, David puts his social and emotional skills into practice every single day. Learn more about David’s work with Urban Assembly on their website, UrbanAssembly.org. ***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

We’re almost two months into 2025, and how many of us have already given up on our New Year's resolutions? If you feel stuck in old habits, don’t beat yourself up. You might just need a new approach.Eric Zimmer is a behavioral coach and host of the podcast, “The One You Feed,” and he believes in creating realistic goals. “We often set ourselves up to make big changes that we're just not in a position to make,” he tells Tim. A common mistake, Eric says, is relying too much on willpower. If you really want to make a change, “...make it hard to do the things you don't want to do, and make it easy to do the things you do want to do,” he says.Eric has personal experience with creating lasting change. Throughout his twenties and thirties, his struggles with addiction were too big for him to handle alone. “It's like a series of vines that just tighten around you,” he told Tim. Getting sober taught him the importance of abandoning shame without abandoning accountability, and it also brought unexpected benefits, for more than just himself. “The more I'm able to forgive myself, the more I'm able to forgive you,” he says. “The more I'm able to forgive you, the more I'm actually able to forgive myself.”***Eric Zimmer is a behavior coach, an interfaith spiritual director, and a writer. He’s also the host of the award-winning podcast, “The One You Feed.” For more than two decades, he’s used the many lessons from his own life and recovery to help others build new habits aligned with their core goals. Learn more about his work on his website, oneyoufeed.net***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

As a young child who often found delight in isolation, award-winning writer and cultural critic, Hanif Abdurraqib now regularly curates playlists as a way to connect with others as well as as well as himself. But for Hanif, a playlist is never just a list of songs. It's a carefully constructed narrative, a shared emotional experience, and a "catalog of excitements," creating a sonic world that other people can access. Like a writer weaving together a plot or a pastor crafting a sermon, Hanif sequences his playlists with intention, knowing that when one song is placed next to another, it has the ability to reach deep within the listener and ignite something powerful. As Hanif says, “The playlist [is] a real spiritual practice of generosity.”On today’s practice episode, Hanif guides Tim through his Spotify playlist, “A Community Compendium of Opening Lyrics,” which he created with the help of his followers on Instagram. They explore the emotional power of music and memory through songs featured on the playlist like Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA" and Prince's "Let's Go Crazy." Together, they dig deep into Hanif’s playlist-making approach and uncover how we all can take part in this spiritual practice, which Hanif believes can help us process the difficult emotions we encounter in our lives. “I know for a fact I'm not going to heal my anxiety with a song, but by using a song as a soundtrack to it, it fleshes it out more,” Hanif explains, “I feel like I'm living alongside of it and not that it's living within me. And if I'm living alongside it, it's easier for me to kind of control it.”***Hanif Abdurraqib is an award-winning writer and cultural critic from the east side of Columbus, Ohio. His work has appeared in The Fader, Pitchfork, and The New Yorker, and he's a recipient of the MacArthur Foundation's Genius Grant. He’s written several books of poetry and essays, including the New York Times bestseller, Go Ahead In The Rain: Notes To A Tribe Called Quest and his latest book, There’s Always This Year, a mesmerizing memoir on basketball, life, and home.Learn more about his work on his website, abdurraqib.com. Listen to Hanif’s playlist “A Community Compendium of Opening Lyrics,” and check out two songs not featured on the playlist that take Hanif and Tim way back –Nirvana’s Smells Like Teen Spirit and Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass’ Spanish Flea.***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound. 

Jen Hatmaker was a rockstar in evangelical circles in the late 2000s. She founded and co-led a church with her husband and headlined Christian women’s conferences around the country as a sought after speaker. She ran a popular blog with millions of followers and published several books and Bible studies, coaching women on marriage and family as a wife and mother of five. So when Jen announced that her 26-year marriage had come to an end in September 2020, she sent shockwaves throughout her community.Forced to rebuild her private life and public image at the same time, Jen came face-to-face with the truth that what she’d been taught to believe, and even teach others, no longer made sense to her. But in her grief and recovery, she discovered a new understanding of her faith, one that holds two simple beliefs: love God and love people. “There's gotta be a ‘we over me,’” Jen tells Tim in this week’s episode “It is good for our souls and our minds and our lives to care about other people and to say…What does the common good look like here? If my neighbor is suffering, then I am suffering. Period.”***Jen Hatmaker is the New-York Times bestselling author of For The Love, Of Mess and Moxie, Fierce, Free, and Full of Fire, and Feed These People, along with 10 other books. She hosts the award-winning For the Love podcast and is the delighted curator of the Jen Hatmaker Book Club. She is also the leader of a tightly knit online community where she reaches millions of people each week. Jen is a co-founder of the Legacy Collective, a giving organization that grants millions of dollars towards sustainable projects around the world. She is a mom to five kids, and lives just outside Austin, Texas. Learn more about her work on her website, jenhatmaker.com***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

Football shaped Mike Adams into the man he is today. “The biggest sign in our locker room said ‘Respect Women,’” he tells Tim about his time playing for Ohio State University. His team was the center of his life, connecting him with friends, mentors, and a sense of purpose.So when Mike retired from the NFL after years of injuries and complications, he lost a community that was important to him. “There's an identity shift that happens when you retire where… overnight, I'm no longer a football player,” Mike says. “Well, who am I going to be?”For Mike, yoga brought him the answer. It put him in touch with his body in ways football never did, and the people he met through yoga valued him outside of his success in the NFL. Mike’s yoga practice helped him transition into a new sense of purpose, and he became a yoga teacher to provide the same support to others that helped him when he needed it most. “It's given me a way to push myself mentally and spiritually,” he says. “But then also… a way to give back.”***Mike Adams is a yoga and mindfulness instructor. You can learn more about him and his yoga retreats at his website thehopedealer.yoga and find his virtual classes at stillwavelive.com.***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.

Marion Jones is a business mentor and joyful fitness coach of entrepreneurs, sharing the hard-earned lessons from her former life as a professional athlete.Many of us remember her as the world champion track and field athlete who dominated the 2000 Sydney Olympic Games, winning five medals and becoming the first woman to do so at a single Olympic game. Years later, Marion was convicted of lying to prosecutors about her use of performance-enhancing drugs. In the aftermath, she was stripped of all her medals and Olympic track records and sentenced to six months in prison, effectively ending her competitive career. While in prison, Marion spent 49 days in solitary confinement. Away from distractions, the spotlight, her family, and her friends, she came face-to-face with her mistakes and the process of rebuilding her life from the inside out began. “I [refused] to allow this to be the end of my story,” Marion says, “I have a testimony and a story that is so powerful that you cannot even compare [it] to any race.” While many have been quick to dismiss her story as a cautionary tale, Marion is resolute in her belief that failure isn’t forever. Marion says, “You don't have to allow all your past mistakes to define who you are…You control who you are and who you can become.”***Marion Jones is a former world champion track and field athlete. She played two seasons of professional basketball in the Women's National Basketball Association, as point guard for the Tulsa Shock. Marion is also the author of “On the Right Track from Olympic Downfall to Finding Forgiveness and the Strength to Overcome and Succeed.” Learn more about her fitness training and coaching work on her website, marionjones.com. ***Our theme music was written by Andy Ogden and produced by Tim Lauer, Andy Ogden and Julian Raymond. All other music that you hear in this episode is courtesy of Epidemic Sound.