Share

cover art for 1514 || you don't really look like that

Make Your Damn Bed

1514 || you don't really look like that

I am starting to think some of us are looking at ourselves too much, and if you stare at anything too long, it will start to look weird after a while. Plus, the internet has warped our perception of what real humans + real aging is supposed to look like.


But today, I want to talk about the ways "selfie-culture" has distorted many people's perception of themselves. I think if more people realized how distorted our selfie cameras make us look, they'd feel a lot less critical of themselves.


Today's Sources:

  1. Oohs St.Lou's Studios (The Visuals): https://oohstloustudios.com/the-science-of-the-selfie-no-you-dont-really-look-like-that#
  2. ENT of Athens "Your Selfie is Lying to You": https://www.entofathens.com/your-selfie-is-lying-to-you/
  3. Popular Science "Selfie Face Perception Distortion": https://www.popsci.com/technology/selfie-face-perception-distortion/
  4. How to look better in selfies: https://www.slrlounge.com/why-your-selfies-look-awful-what-can-is-being-done-to-look-better-in-selfies/


Resources for Resisting a Coup: https://makeyourdamnbed.medium.com/practical-guides-to-resisting-a-coup-b44571b9ad66


SUPPORT Julie (and the show!): https://supporter.acast.com/make-your-damn-bed

DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund: www.pcrf.net

GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com

TUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcast

OR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcast

OR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica 


The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.



More episodes

View all episodes

  • 1660 || surveillance makes us docile

    11:27|
    How do we feel like we’re not being watched, when we are being watched?Studies show that citizens tolerate being surveilled, and eventually stop thinking about it. But we tend to act more docile + reliable after we forget. The camera makes you more docile. It makes you a better employee. But the camera has taken something from you. Your complex and unstable kinetic energy. Everyday it reanimates your body in predictable loops.” The first time I realized I was being surveilled without my knowing, was at my first job. Cold Stone Creamery ice cream shop. The rumor was they’d sit at home and watch us at work, but I didn’t believe it. One day, I mopped the front when I received a phone call saying, “you only dipped the mop once, the dining room requires three dips for a proper cleaning.” Needless to say, 16 year old me was shook. I never mopped without doing it their way, again. I behaved differently on my shifts, from there on out. I feeling anxious and paranoid — but I’d completely forgotten about what caused it. I just thought, “this is what work feels like.” So it effectively shocked me into submission, with very little effort. The camera is a gun. It’s about power. And we all recognize what the power a camera holds. A video at our worst moment, can get you fired, arrested, or harassed. We cope with this reality in our own ways. We stop going out, we stop dancing, we stop interacting. We participate as viewers who critique and judge. Or we pick up the power ourselves, and turn the camera + surveillance and judgement to those around us. How has the surveillance state affected your behavior?Did you realize that the panopticon was affecting you at all?The only way we can learn to cope + navigate without losing ourselves or our humanity, is if we’re willing to face it head on. Watch Lily Alexandre's Youtube Video.Read episode scripts on Julie's Medium Blog.SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.
  • 1659 || psychic burden of being surveilled

    10:04|
    Cameras "take" and "capture" reality, but even when we know it's manufactured, we tend to trust what we can see. Today, we talk about the historical and psychological implications of photography. Watch Lily Alexandre's Youtube Video. Read episode scripts on Julie's Medium Blog. SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1659 || personal panopticon

    11:01|
    I have tried to be conscious of any of the personally imposed surveillance that I take part in.It’s futile, I’m sure, but: I opt out of everything I can possibly opt out of online. I talk shit to and about every Ring doorbell to anyone who will listen.I opt out of the biometric data collection at the TSA, despite some of the officers reminding me they have my data already. The point is, I like exercising my rights where the options still exist. Even if it is futile. And even if it is inconvenient for me, I’m not taking your online cookies. It deeply infuriates me that I’m not “allowed” to opt out of more. I can’t use my phone, camera, printer, or any other piece of tech without signing the terms and conditions that hold your item (and your family) hostage unless you give up the rights to your entire personhood in a written contract. But you spend three paychecks on these items and it feels like a simple click will get you there, so you sign away without reading a damned thing. Everything I buy feels like just another way for a company to get more access to more of my personal data. The merchandise or service they provide is so obviously an inconvenience to them, at this point. Data is king. And for many companies, your attention has become far more valuable than cash. The dollar may crash but the need for your unpaid labor and energy will never end!!!READ THE SCRIPT FROM TODAY'S EPISODE on Julie's Medium Blog.SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1658 || personal system assessment

    08:25|
     I realized trying to balance things by pushing back and forcing a reset, rather than allowing the swing of humanity, with the full spectrum of human emotions, and restore my faith that just existing is enough. I know that when I am my most inspired I can get inspired by a moth flying at a light, a mom smiling at her baby, and I am known to get emotional when an older person buys themselves ice cream. There is something beautiful and inspiring about the simple act of existence, in it’s purest form.Let yourself be perceived just existing, and have faith that it’s enough, and you’ll automatically reset your systems so you can automatically begin building systems that push you towards the more sustainable, fulfilling, and balanced world you’re so desperate for. But it starts with your own. READ THE SCRIPT FROM TODAY'S EPISODE on Julie's Medium Blog.SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1657 || the year you give yourself a chance

    09:19|
    If the “experience” is the goal, failure ceases to exist.“you will figure it out.” You should trust that. If you don’t believe it, maybe its time to give yourself a chance to prove yourself wrong. In what ways have you been your own biggest bully? In what ways have you become your own opps?Some of you* have been playing really small and trying to fit in boxes that were never built for you and you’re wondering why you’re uncomfortable? Meanwhile, you’re contorting to fit into a box when there’s sprawling land right underneath it, if you’d just stick a limb out and touch it.*meUntil you find the right fit, but don’t blame yourself for cultural problems. Just recognize them so you can create better cultures and rituals around things, when and where you can. READ THE SCRIPT FROM TODAY'S EPISODE on Julie's Medium Blog.SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1656 || controlled demolition

    10:14|
    Sometimes, when the facades are crumbling, you may start to recognize the need for a controlled demolition. Not to destroy anything of value, but to strategically dismantle some of the more daunting aspects of your current human experience. Any routines, beliefs, relationships, that are no longer helpful, we must be willing to strip back to the foundation, so we can actually assess the underlying damage, reset, and rebuild. The thought experiment of a controlled demolition is very helpful, not because it’s important to think of collapse, but because it can be empowering to remember your ability to rebuild better. When you take place in a controlled demolition, you are attempting to address what is worth saving, what is worth improving, and what needs to be completely gutted and reimagined from the ground up. READ THE SCRIPT FROM TODAY'S EPISODE on Julie's Medium Blog. SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1655 || no shame new years

    11:22|
    We write narratives about ourselves that we show up and reflect back. Address the narrative, and recognize you can show up around your "shame" and it doesn't have to be something you identify with. You can allow shame to point, not guide. It's a tool, not a boss. SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1654 || science news around a meaningful life

    11:46|
    2025 brought in some studies that left me with some hope about the future, and I wanted to share that with you. You can read the ones I missed here at Berkeley's Greater Good Magazine Website. SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I
  • 1653 || it's not a debate

    11:14|
    Today is the finale of our series on street epistemology, and we're digging into what NOT to do. Wonder: The big question.Hypothesis: The interlocutor's proposed answer to the question.Elenchus: Question and answer to discover what other reasonable propositions are likely to be true that refute the hypothesis. Proceed by mutual agreement at every step - elenchus is not a debate.Accept or Revise: Refine or revise the hypothesis - either without vulnerability to that elenchus, with reduced confidence, or even rejecting it. On the other hand, if the hypothesis survives repeated attempts at elenchus, provisionally accept it.Act accordingly: Reduce confidence in and reliance on the hypothesis that is refuted by elenchus.Read about the brain in a vat argument.Read about The Teapot Analogy. Read: On the reception and detection of pseudo-profound bullshitRead Perth Skeptics collection of street epistemology resources.Read Berkeley's "Bridging Differences Playbook" Visit the Street Epistemology Website.Read the Wikipedia on Street Epistemology.SUPPORT JULIE (and the show!)DONATE to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund AND THE Sudan Relief FundGET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBESUBSCRIBE FOR BONUS CONTENT ON PATREON.The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. I