Joy Found Here

What if the quiet feeling that you're not enough isn't a character flaw — but something your nervous system learned long ago just to keep you safe? In episode 266 of Joy Found Here, psychotherapist and author Kristine B. Jensen unpacks one of the most misunderstood and under-named emotions we carry: shame — and how the stories we've been telling ourselves for decades may finally be ready to be set free.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(4:45) Kristine's decades as a psychotherapist couldn't shake her own unnamed inner struggle(6:27) Retiring forced her to face herself — and what that revealed(9:53) The moment she named her feeling as shame for the first time(13:00) Shame as a survival instinct — and why we never choose it(15:42) Where "shame speak" comes from and why it once protected us(19:33) How childhood emotional nourishment shapes our nervous system and self-worth(29:23) The client who sparked a book that almost didn't get written(32:55) Compassion for our younger selves and seeing our parents differently(35:23) Forgiveness as an inside job — and the freedom it brings(44:48) First steps: self-talk awareness, journaling, and breaking the cycle of old storiesKristine B. Jensen is a speaker, author, and licensed psychotherapist with over four decades of experience helping people understand the hidden roots of self-doubt. She reframes shame not as a personal flaw but as a survival response — and knows this territory from the inside out. She is the author of Bruised Not Broken: Healing the Shame of a Troubled Childhood.In this episode, Kristine shares how — despite decades as a successful psychotherapist — she carried a feeling she couldn't name until retirement forced her to sit with herself and she finally identified it as shame. She explains that shame is not a character flaw but a survival instinct the nervous system triggers automatically, often rooted in childhoods where feelings didn't matter or approval had to be earned. Healing, she offers, means speaking to our younger selves with compassion, doing the work of forgiveness as an inside job, and noticing our self-talk — because what's waiting on the other side is freedom.Connect with Kristine B. Jensen:WebsiteFacebookLinkedInInstagramBook: Kristine B. Jensen - Bruised Not BrokenLet's Connect:WebsiteInstagram

What happens when a woman who spent decades holding everyone else together finally has no choice but to let go? In episode 265 of Joy Found Here, Florence Acosta — former Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist, healthcare executive, and the person everyone leaned on — shares how a stroke at 50 became the moment that shattered her old identity and cracked her wide open. Her story is a powerful reminder that sometimes the body says stop long before we ever will.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(3:46) How Florence went from holding everything together to having a stroke at 50(6:05) Why chronic givers struggle to receive — and the mindset keeping them stuck(7:43) The sisterhood circle that cracked open her awareness around control and letting go(11:51) The childhood moment at age three that silently took her voice for decades(13:17) How writing on Substack became an unexpected act of reclaiming her voice(20:54) How the Miracle Morning helps Florence create space and stay grounded in recovery(23:04) The "Question of the Day" ritual she runs for her Substack subscribers(24:15) Florence's new business venture with her sister — and why she broke her own rule(26:41) Her "C-cubed" self-care approach: cooking, crocheting, and creative writing(31:03) Why people want to help — and how telling them how changes everythingFlorence Acosta spent nearly 30 years in healthcare — first as a Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist, then as executive director of a surgical center — carrying the weight of patients, teams, and everyone around her without ever pausing to fill her own cup. At 50, a stroke caused by an undetected arteriovenous malformation forced her to stop, and through the slow road of recovery, a women's sisterhood circle, and the discovery of writing, she found the voice she had quietly lost decades before. Today she writes about intentional living, mindset, and personal development through her Substack publication Becoming You with Florence Acosta.In this episode, Florence shares how decades of over-giving as both a healthcare professional and the person everyone leaned on ultimately led to her stroke — and how that rupture became the catalyst for rebuilding on her own terms. She traces her lifelong silence back to a childhood moment at age three, and how Substack became the unexpected place where she finally reclaimed her voice. Florence also opens up about her Miracle Morning practice, a new business venture with her sister, and her "C-cubed" self-care approach — cooking, crocheting, and creative writing — while delivering a powerful message to fellow chronic givers: open your hands and let people in before life forces you to.Connect with Florence Acosta:SubstackInstagramLet's Connect:WebsiteInstagram

What if burnout isn't a sign you're doing too much — but a sign you've forgotten who you are? In episode 264 of Joy Found Here, Dr. Rebecca Hubbard, licensed clinical psychologist and TEDx speaker, brings her own hard-won burnout story to the table — from a thyroid diagnosis to burning out again despite doing all the "right" things — and reveals why the real fix isn't another self-care routine. It's an identity shift.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(03:15) How a basketball scholarship brought Rebecca from Berlin to the U.S. — and planted the seeds of burnout (05:30) The thyroid diagnosis that forced her first real recalibration (07:03) Why self-care alone wasn't enough — and burning out again during the pandemic (08:46) The identity shift at the heart of burnout recovery (10:48) How social, cultural, and professional identities intersect to fuel over-functioning (13:15) Why slowing down is medicine — and what comedic yoga taught her about it (22:32) Micro self-care in action: three practical strategies for overwhelmed moms (26:00) The real definition of burnout — and why interrupting chronic stress is the key (38:01) Why reading for pleasure (not self-improvement) is a radical act against hustle culture (42:38) The shift from proving to choosing — and what that looks like in real lifeDr. Rebecca Hubbard is a licensed clinical psychologist, burnout prevention specialist, and TEDx speaker based in Chicago, Illinois. With over a decade of clinical practice, she works with high-responsibility professionals navigating chronic stress, identity pressure, and performance expectations, drawing on research in race and resilience and a mindfulness-integrated approach. She is also an award-winning comedic yoga instructor who offers individual therapy, virtual workshops, and small-group sessions to help people break burnout cycles for good.In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hubbard reframes burnout not as a self-care or time management problem, but as an identity issue rooted in the stories we've absorbed about our worth — from family, culture, and profession. Drawing on her own burnout journey (including a thyroid diagnosis and burning out again during the pandemic despite having all the "right" boundaries in place), she introduces the concept of micro self-care: mindful everyday tasks, maximizing actual breaks, and reducing stress in daily transitions. She and Stephanie also explore motherhood, perfectionism, and the systemic barriers that make rest harder to access — closing with a powerful reminder to move from proving to choosing who you want to become.Connect with Dr Rebecca Hubbard:WebsiteInstagramLinkedInMediumLet's Connect:WebsiteInstagram

What if the reason you can't stick to diets has nothing to do with willpower and everything to do with how your brain is wired? In episode 263 of Joy Found Here, Lizzie Merritt, bestselling author and certified weight loss coach, reveals how a daily 4:37 PM snack spiral became her wake-up call. From middle school science teacher to coach, Lizzie shows that weight loss isn't about food or willpower. It's about teaching your brain to feel safe enough to change. Through her books "You Are a Miracle" and "LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss," she cracks the code on why traditional diets fail and why her brain-based method actually works.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(5:31) How a daily 4:37 PM snack habit turned into a binge cycle, even though she knew exactly what to do(7:07) The 2:33 AM moment in Guam when loneliness and overwhelm forced her to choose between the hamster wheel or finding the missing piece(10:53) Why diets literally work against the way women's brains are wired, no matter how smart or capable they are(15:20) How deleting tracking apps and asking "Am I hungry?" started to shift her relationship with food(20:12) Why feeling safe around food and stress is the actual foundation, not discipline or willpower(29:37) The L.I.G.H.T. Method: how teaching your body to feel safe makes change feel possible instead of threatening(47:25) Why reframing food as a choice instead of a moral judgment changes the entire dynamic(48:07) How the Confident Body Podcast became her platform for reaching women who are tired of starting over every MondayLizzie Merritt is a former middle school science teacher turned certified weight loss coach and bestselling author. She helps smart, capable women break free from rule-following diet cycles. Through her L.I.G.H.T. Method, she teaches a brain-based approach that works with your brain instead of against it. She reminds women that the life you want to lose weight for is waiting on the other side of safety, not suffering.Lizzie takes you back to the 2:33 AM moment that changed everything. On a tiny island, she discovered through neuroscience that our brains seek comfort when they don't feel safe. Strict rules create a threat, nervous systems shut down, and shame becomes constant. As she learned to feel safe around food and change, mental real estate freed up. She opens up about why rule-following backfires in diets and how her podcast became an act of courage. By the end, Stephanie and Lizzie map out why Monday resets are symptoms, not solutions, and why breakthroughs happen when you stop waiting to lose weight and start living the life you want.Connect with Lizzie: Instagram Facebook LinkedIn Listen to The Confident Body podcastBooks: You Are A Miracle : How to Lose Weight and Love Your Body Too LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight LossLet's Connect: Website Instagram

What if the life you were always meant to live was hiding inside the one you were already living? In episode 262 of Joy Found Here, Katie DeBonville — writer, musician, and first-time memoirist at 53 — shares how a pandemic-era MFA, a lifelong love of music, and the quiet courage to finally call herself a writer converged into her debut memoir, Grace Notes: A Musical Memoir. For Katie, the story wasn't about starting over — it was about finally letting every part of herself show up on the page at once.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(04:54) How a blank book from her dad sparked a lifelong love of writing — and why flute nearly won(07:17) The crisis of confidence that redirected Katie from music to arts fundraising(10:01) Why the pandemic and a low-residency MFA at Lesley University changed everything(11:28) The friend's book launch that led her to Sibylline Press — and an acceptance email in three days(12:27) Getting the life-changing news on a bus in Scotland(14:33) The three mentors who transformed a seven-page draft into a full memoir chapter(24:38) Why she resisted the "memoir" label — and what finally made her embrace it(36:50) Why the world's shrinking expectations became her greatest creative freedomKatie DeBonville is a writer, musician, and arts fundraising professional whose debut memoir, Grace Notes: A Musical Memoir, is published by Sibylline Press — a house dedicated to women 50 and over. A lifelong flutist who once dreamed of the Boston Symphony Orchestra, she spent 30 years in arts development before the pandemic gave her the push she needed to pursue her MFA in creative writing at Lesley University, where her thesis became the memoir she was always meant to write.In this episode, Katie DeBonville shares the winding road from childhood writer and aspiring musician to first-time published memoirist at 53 — a journey shaped by crises of confidence, a pandemic-era MFA, and mentors who refused to let her call a seven-page draft "done." She opens up about the writing community she found at Lesley, her composer grandfather whose work appears on a Nina Simone record, and why it took another woman calling her a writer before she could claim the title herself. She also drops a line Stephanie immediately flagged for a mug: "The world has fewer expectations of me, so I can have more expectations of myself."Connect with Katie DeBonville:FacebookInstagramLinkedInSubstackBook: Katie DeBonville - Grace NotesLet's Connect:WebsiteInstagram

What if the psychologist sitting across from you has faced the very same darkness she's spent 40 years helping others through? In episode 261 of Joy Found Here, Dr. Celeste Birkhofer — Stanford faculty member and author of the forthcoming Beyond Quick Fixes — opens up about her own mental health struggles and the devastating loss of her son to bipolar disorder, and why she believes mental health isn't a luxury — it's a lifeline.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(3:14) How Dr. Celeste's own struggles with depression and disordered eating led her to psychology(5:00) The loss of her son to bipolar disorder and how it deepened her mission(7:47) The "false self" — why high-achievers often struggle most beneath the surface(11:20) How social media is fueling the mental health crisis in young people(13:15) Three strategies for navigating comparison: inspiration, self-compassion, and gratitude(33:21) A practical framework of self-awareness, curiosity, and compassion for when you're struggling(37:32) What emotional intelligence is — and why it matters as much as raw brain power(43:11) Why grief comes in waves and the danger of avoiding hard feelings(46:54) Why resilience must be earned through difficulty — it can't be givenDr. Celeste Birkhofer (PhD, PsyD) is a licensed Clinical Psychologist with over 40 years of experience helping individuals and couples navigate depression, anxiety, grief, trauma, and addiction. She serves as Adjunct Clinical Faculty at Stanford Medical School's Department of Psychiatry & Behavioral Sciences, sits on the Clinical Advisory Board for the JED Foundation, and is an Executive Contributor for Brainz Magazine. She is also the author of the upcoming Beyond Quick Fixes: Essential Inner Resources for Good Mental Health and a Fulfilling Life (September 1, 2026). In this episode, Dr. Celeste Birkhofer draws on both clinical expertise and personal experience — including her own struggles with depression and disordered eating, and the loss of her son to bipolar disorder — to explore what it truly takes to prioritize mental health. She unpacks the "false self" syndrome driven by social media, shares three strategies for handling comparison (inspiration, self-compassion, and gratitude), and offers a practical framework of self-awareness, curiosity, and compassion for anyone in a tough place. She also breaks down emotional intelligence, explains why resilience must be built through difficulty rather than avoided, and closes with a powerful reminder that the brain is neuroplastic — growth is always possible.Connect with Dr. Celeste Birkhofer:WebsiteFacebookInstagramLinkedInLet's Connect:WebsiteInstagram