It Is Complicated


Etiquette is complicated

Season 1, Ep. 45

How did covid change how we do this politeness thing? Is there queer etiquette? What happens when we rub against people’s expectations when we state our boundaries?


Is our queer etiquette a reaction to the hypocrisy of the middle-class “polite”? How can we be respectful, equitable, and inclusive? What is the height of “good manners”? Is making people comfortable where we should be aiming? Is respect where this aims for?


We touch on how crossing countries can mean crossing class, and how that can change how we are read, and how we can be masked, and unmasked. Some of it we learn, some of it we gain as an advantage without any effort. 


When we approach this playfully and performatively is this our “sweet spot”? 

It might not actually be that complicated - Be Kind, Be respectful, and use Lovely.


We have a transcript for this episode - IIC Episode 45 Transcript


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Give us feedback - we’re on twitter - - we’d love to connect with you about etiquette.

More Episodes


Working from home is complicated

Season 1, Ep. 46
Based on a listener request for a discussion on working from home in the current culture environment from a perspective that is not a middle class straight white cis man - we touch on the advantages we have as queers that’s made this easier, and what advantages that others within our community might not have.We cover the way work has changed, and how output in academia has increased but only by men (are you surprised? We weren’t). Having more than one job is normal for most minority groups, including women. Housework and childcare is work, and who does it makes a difference.Work is not just the day job, it’s also the side hustle, the fun job, the extra things we do (like podcasts) - and that impacts our space. Does work become a liminal notion mixing public and private spaces?How much more inclusive have we been able to be? We both have the huge advantage of having work that can be done remotely, and our experience is not universal. Is a commute and an office still desired? Are we building a huge technological divide.Tackling this through a queer, non-normative, lens shows the advantages and disadvantages that impact us all. There is no “normal” office to return to.We have a transcript for this episode -IIC Episode 46 TranscriptOur Patreon - us feedback - we’re on twitter - - we’d love to connect with you about working from home.