Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships

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How Sneaky Covert Narcissists Play on Your Empathy

Ep. 73

Do you have a feeling that what's going on in your relationship is less than honest, and yet, you feel strangely like you're not doing enough?

You may well be with a covert narcissist!


Even for me, working with couples all over the world, it takes longer to identify covert narcissism in a person, and in a relationship, than with other demonstrations of narcissism.


Why? Because it is sneaky, under-handed, passive, and plays on your heart strings more than overt or malignant narcissism. It takes longer to be sure that's what's playing out. And, when I'm working with a couple, I want to be sure...and, so do you, I know.


Covert narcissists play the victim, misunderstood and under-valued in their own minds. It's all a manipulation, but that's what they want to believe. They feel as entitled as overt narcissists, but, they don't express it in the same ways.


  • Are you with someone who is always the victim?
  • Does s/he tell you that they never are valued, or seen for who they really are?
  • Does that person try to keep you feeling sorry for them?
  • Do you feel like you are the caretaker of their self-esteem and self-confidence?


These can be very clear signs of covert narcissism, especially when they are all present. Of course, there are many more signs, and I've put as many in today's episode as I could in the time available. You'll be able to get a good sense if you're with a covert narcissist....finally. And, it will be a big relief, I'm guessing!


Listen in, and see if what's keeping you feeling like you're supposed to be the cheerleader for a permanent underdog is really covert narcissism.


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I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!

If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Optimize Circles now.

Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.

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HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:

  • What covert narcissists do
  • How covert narcissism is easy to miss
  • Why covert narcissism is hard to identify
  • How covert narcissism shows up in your daily relationship
  • Why covert narcissists make you second-guess yourself and err on the side of empathy
  • Why covert narcissists are particularly crazy-making, yet make you stay longer


You'll find that in many other episodes of this podcast, and on my YouTube channel, too.

Enjoy my other podcast, Emotional Savvy: The Relationship Help Show, here, or wherever you like to find your podcasts.


Listen to today's episode, and, if by chance, you're still wondering if you have had a #Hijackal in your life, grab my

FREE EBOOK, How to Spot a Hijackal® at Hijackals.com . You need to know what's up now, so you don't make mistakes that will hurt you. Grab it!


If you need help with any part of the journey with--and from--a #Hijackal, I'm here for you. Let's talk soon. I make it easy and accessible for you to have your first one-hour session with me for only $97.


Make positive changes NOW.


Big hugs,

Rhoberta


Rhoberta Shaler, PhD,

The Relationship Help Doctor

TransformingRelationship.com or ForRelationshipHelp.com


P.S. Subscribe to my newsletter, Tips for Relationships, HERE.


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CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER:

Website: TransformingRelationship.com

Podcasts: RelationshipHelpNetwork.com

Facebook: RelationshipHelpDoctor

Twitter: Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler

LinkedIn: LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler

Instagram: Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler

Pinterest: Pinterest.com/TheRelationshipHelpDoctor


YouTubeYouTube.com/ForRelationshipHelp


You can also listen to the last 32 episodes of Save Your Sanity on Mental Health News Radio Network. That's a great place to get in-depth insights for shoring up mental and emotional health of all kinds.


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