Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships

6/28/2022

10 Shattering Signs Your Partner is Having an Emotional Affair

Ep. 263
"Oh, we're just friends." You want to believe that, but how do you know if it's true. Here's how to tell if that "friendship" IS emotional infidelity, an emotional affair, and/or just plain cheating. Don't be fooled. See & believe these signs!!!It's tempting to believe them, especially because then you don't have to feel the feelings or take action. BUT, doing so is unhealthy! HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:What an emotional affair really isIs it cheating?Why Hijackals (relentlessly difficult people) are often emotionally unfaithful10 BIG differences between "being friend" & having an emotional affairWhat emotional infidelity looks and sound likeThings people say when they're actually cheating emotionallyI'm here to helpLet's talk soon.RhobertaIntroductory session for new clients,only $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.EmergingEmpowered.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comNEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#emotionalaffair #emotionalinfidelity #emotionallyunfaithful #emotionalcheating#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
6/21/2022

How Emotional Abuse Creates Fear of Rejection

Ep. 262
Find yourself afraid you're not good enough? You won't be hired? You won't be wanted? Loved? Accepted? Fear of rejection may be the culprit underlying those thoughts. SO IMPORTANT to recognize so you can overcome the fears that may be holding you back from healthier relationships with yourself and others...including the NASTY Hijackals!Recognize the limitations that the fear of rejection creates in your life, so you can reject it! No need to allow that fear to rule. See it. Reject it. Change it! HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:Dr. Shaler's definition of emotional abuseHow you feel when you fear rejectionHow fear of rejection limits your life & relationshipsHow Hijackal (narcissistic) parents control you with this fearI'm here to help Let's talk soon.RhobertaIntroductory session for new clients,only $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.EmergingEmpowered.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comNEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND online Emerging Empowered Journals with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#fearofrejection #definitionofemotionalabuse #narcissisticparent #whereIgotfearofrejection#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
6/14/2022

Recognizing How GASLIGHTING is Intentionally Crazy-Making

Ep. 261
Bit by bit, you start to second-guess yourself, and even question your sanity. Gaslighting will do that! Learn what it is and how to recognize even the most subtle forms. ALSO, gaslighting is emotional abuse. So, see it so you can stop it from making you crazy!Gaslighting is emotional abuse and psychological manipulation. NOT GOOD! The sooner you see the more subtle forms as well as the more obvious forms of gaslighting, the sooner you'll step back and reclaim your self-confidence. May not happen overnight, but it will happen!HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:Obvious & subtle examples of gaslightingHow repeatedly gaslighting you wears you downHijackals want to define your reality for you I'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.EmergingEmpowered.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comNEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly Sunday Seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#crazymaking #gaslighting #intentiallycrazymaking #manipulation #definingmyrealityforme#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
6/7/2022

Dealing with Hijackal Lies: Pathological & Natural

Ep. 260
Lies of any kind undermine trust. Big difference between folks who decide to lie and those who don't. Learn how you can respond effectively, though it may not stop the lying. Learn the distinction between natural & pathological liars. It's a big one! But, does it make a difference when you're on the receiving end of it? HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:Why people lieWhy Hijackals think you'll finally believe their lies. (Do you?)How they lie about the most important thing: loveDifferences between natural liars and pathological liarsWhy you may not be willing to pay the high cost of uncovering deceit...but need to! I'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.EmergingEmpowered.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comNEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#naturalliars #pathologicalliars #costofdeceit #believinglies #IknowImbeingliedto #emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
5/31/2022

How to Safely Read Narcissistic Hijackal Smiles & Smirks

Ep. 259
Can you trust a smile? How do you read a smirk? What's the difference? What do they mean? When dealing with narcissistic Hijackals, you REALLY need to know! Learn about detecting signs of danger. Know when you need to protect yourself. Know when it's safe to connect (and, it rarely is when you have a Hijackal partner, parent, sibling, or adult child, sadly) HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:The confusing clash of non-verbal cues from HijackalsThe difference between a genuine smile and a "social" smileWhy Hijackal smiles are often forced, and their laughter is hollow8 nasty reasons Hijackals smirk I'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.EmergingEmpowered.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comNEWSLETTER: http://www.HijackalHelp.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#mixedmessages #manipulativecommunication #manipulatingmessages #mixedmessagesofanarcissist#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
5/24/2022

How Hijackals (Narcissists) Keep You Hooked By Mixed Messages

Ep. 258
Yes? No? Maybe? Someday? Your head can be spinning! What to believe? How to decide? What to pay attention to? MIXED MESSAGES keep you hooked, questioning your sanity, and second-guessing yourself. One thing you CAN BE CLEAR about: you need to see those mixed message for what they are: CONTROL.It's tempting to focus on the parts of a mixed message that you SO want to be true. You can fool yourself that way. And, you'll suffer. Hopefully, this episode will help you with insights to stop all that. HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:What kinds of mixed messages there areHow mixed messages can be delivered over time and/or in one sentenceExamples of mixed messages from parents & partnersHow you decide what part of a mixed message to believeI'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#mixedmessages #manipulativecommunication #manipulatingmessages #mixedmessagesofanarcissist#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
5/17/2022

How You Are Manipulated By a Narcissist's Voice

Ep. 257
Whether you have a Hijackal parent, partner, sibling, or other of the narcissistic variety, knowing how they manipulate you with their voices is important to recognize. AND, they only do some of that manipulating consciously. Once you're aware of these important cues, you can refuse to be affected. GREAT!This episode will help you see how you're being subconsciously affected by the tone, pace, volume, and other cues that a Hijackal gives through their voice.HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:How your body reads the HijackalWhy your mind argues with your bodyWhy you need to know you can trust your body's wisdomHow Hijackals manipulate you with their voiceKnow what you're actually taking in...andKnow to trust your bodyI'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#polyvagaltheory #neuroception #subconsciouslymanipulated #voicemakesmefeelunsafe #readingvoicecues#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
5/10/2022

6 Nasty Ways Hijackals Perpetrate Post-Separation Abuse

Ep. 256
Relief! Yes, you think you'll feel it when you leave an emotionally abusive relationship, and you will...in some ways. Then, in too many ways, the Hijackal is likely to do everything possible to exert continued control over you...and, over your children. Eight ways Hijackals continue to exert control. Is it happening to you?(NOTE: This episode ends abruptly due to technical issues.)HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:How domestic violence and domestic abuse can continue after separationWhat post-separation abuse is6 ways to prepare for after leaving a Hijackal ( or anyone who is narcissistic, borderline, histrionic, psychopathic, or sociopathic)How ACEs--Adverse Childhood Experiences--often follow separating from a HijackalPreparing to be safe after leaving an abuserI'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#postseparationabuse #violenceafterIleave #narcissisticabuse #whathappensafterIleave #abuseafterleaving #leavinganabuser#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse
5/3/2022

Saying No to "Shoulds" & Toxic Shame

Ep. 255
Who has told you what to do and how to do it? Who told you who you are and what you're worth? Did it include "shoulds" and shame? So important to recognize because it may be still playing a part in your life. Also, others can still tap into it, especially Hijackals. So many ways that narcissists and other Hijackals want to exert power over you, and do it by continuously shaming you, making you wrong, small, guilt-ridden, and diminished! Toxic shaming is one of those ways. See it clearly so you can reject it! HIGHLIGHTS OF THIS EPISODE:Why you may not realize how many times you've been told you "should"Why "shoulding on yourself" is toxicThe myth of perfectionismWhat toxic shame isHow toxic shame is perpetrated Internalizing toxic shame I'm here to help.Let's talk soon.RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and supportfrom me? We can talk:Introductory session for new clients, $97FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE:https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST:http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK:https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER:https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN:https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM:https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST:https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE:https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If youwant to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Emerging Empowered Community now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + 2 group Ask Me Anything calls + a monthly seminar, AND an online Emerging Empowered Journal with prompts each month!WOW! Join now.Dr. Shaler's Emerging Empowered Community#shoulds #toxicshame #whatistoxicshame #hownarcissistsusetoxicshame #hijackalstoxicshame#emotionalabuserecovery #emergingempowered #relationshipincrisis #personalitydisorders#signsofemotionalabuse #amibeingabused #toxicrelationships #narcissist #hijackal #emotionalabuse