Growing Through Grief


Dave Sanderson | Hudson River Plane Crash - Blame The Event Or Grow

Ep. 18

Nature likes symmetry; if we look at a tree, we will see the same pattern of human veins in its branches. Life is cyclical; life is born and dies with methodic precision season after season. In his book, The Fourth Turning, W. Strauss, looking at history's cycles, points out a pattern of significant tragedies every four generations. To Dave Sanderson, one of the survivors of The Miracle of Hudson, Strauss' words made total sense. Sanderson realized all of us will have our plane crash moments; what we learn from them and how we react is what matters. 

Dave Sanderson was seated in the back row of US Airways Flight 1549, which crashed in the Hudson River in January 2009. At the moment of the crash, he heard the voice of his mother, who had told him to always do the right thing, and God would take care of the rest. That day, ignoring his hypothermia, his fear, and ignoring the fact that he was risking his own life, Dave helped dozens of people escape from that sinking plane. 

In this episode, Dave gives us details of his life-changing experience, how it inspired him to help others, and the tools he got from it to deal with adversity. We talk about those plane crash moments we will all go through eventually and the connection he made between the pandemic and his experience at the Hudson River. Dave also described his sensations coming back to the river many years later. 

Some Questions I Ask:

  •  Could you tell us what happened in the Hudson River? (2:27)
  • When the pandemic hit, you said it was like a plane crash. What do you mean by that? (8:47)
  • You talk about Post-Traumatic Growth Syndrome. Could you explain to the audience what that means? (17:21)

In This Episode, You Will Learn:

  • Dave's gameplan while the plane was sinking (3:20)
  • The best way of dealing with the things we permanently push down and numb with alcohol, drugs, work, etc. (10:38)
  • All of us will have our plane crash moments. What are we going to do about it is what matters (15:28)
  • Was the captain praying when the plane was going down? The power of knowing the answer to that question (22:34)
  • Forgiveness is the only path to growth (26:34)


Connect with Dave:

Let's Connect!

More Episodes


Bringing Attention to Inherited Family Trauma

Ep. 65
Whether or not we are aware of it, trauma is a massive transformative force. It molds the way we think and also how we see, react to, and accept reality. In other words, we are a byproduct of our traumatic experiences and the mechanisms we developed to deal with them. However, that doesn't mean there is nothing we can do about it. In this episode, I invite you to bring conscious attention to your inherited family trauma. We learn how to look at it with compassion and curiosity, recognize our responses, and modify our reactions to it. We think of inherited family trauma as a group responsibility and not an individual experience. Plus, we learn mechanisms to accept and embrace painful memories, to allow them to go through us, and, more importantly, how to let them go. We also learn to accept our truth, and I share three points to consider when bringing attention to inherited trauma.In This Episode, You Will Learn:What does it mean to bring attention to inherited trauma? (3:58)Addictions are evidence of family dynamics (8:31)You can let go of most of the things you are carrying (12:15)What if you accept that traumatic experience you endured as a child? (20:29)Three points to remember when thinking of your inherited family trauma (22:06)Your job is to remember the best is yet to come (26:35)Resources:Growing Through Grief System - Book NowLet's Connect!FacebookTwitterInstagramLinkedInWebsiteFacebook Group - Growing Through Grief Together

Jane Duncan Rogers | Before You Go Solutions

Ep. 64
We make a conscious effort to learn how to grieve a loved one. We are aware of the challenges we might be forced to face, the pain we must endure, and the growth we should seek. But what about our own transition? How prepared are we to talk about it? In this episode, Jane Duncan Rogers visits us to encourage the conversation that no one likes to think about, yet everyone should. Jane is the Founder of Before I Go Solutions, a non-profit dedicated to creating end-of-life plans. She is an Author and Facilitator specializing in conversations about dying, death, grief, bereavement, and end-of-life planning, and was the first person to lead You Can Heal Your Life® study groups in the UK, inspired by the book of the same name by Louise Hay. Throughout our conversation, Jane shared the story of how one of the chapters of her book, Gifted by Grief, originated a discussion about end-of-life conversations. We go through Jane's grief journey, her emotions after losing her husband, and how she dealt with them. We also talk about front door/back door feelings, normalizing feeling angry, creating a living will, advanced healthcare directives, and so much more. Some Questions I Ask:I heard you say you and your husband went through cancer together. Would you share a little bit about that? (5:55)Could you talk a little bit about the work you started decades ago, about healing yourself? (15:28)In This Episode, You Will Learn:About Jane's book, Gifted by Grief, and what people loved about it (3:51)There's nothing like facing the end to see things more clearly (7:13)What you feel, you can heal (15:41)Anger is not necessarily a bad thing (18:21)Some of the things we should take care of while we are still here (25:34)Never judge yourself for the feelings you have (40:12)Resources:websiteYouTubeFacebookTwitterBook: Gifted By Grief: A True Story of Cancer, Loss, and RebirthBook: Before I Go: The Essential Guide to Creating a Good End-of-Life PlanGrowing Through Grief System - Book NowConnect with Jane:LinkedInLet's Connect!FacebookTwitterInstagramLinkedInWebsiteFacebook Group - Growing Through Grief Together