Find Your Voice

& write your own story

An empowering movement to help you combat your excuses, take control of your life, write your own story & most importantly Find Your Voice.Whatever your current situation is telling you, it is not the end. It is just a c
Latest Episode3/21/2020

10 Things to help your mental health during Corona virus Social Distancing, self-isolation & quarantine

Ep. 92
I sympathise with anyone at this time. Noone is unaffected but and as I always state about our problems not being exclusive to ourselves, there is no truer realisation for us all that, that is the case.However, conscious that loneliness and self-isolation can increase the pressures on our mental health during this period of corona virus (Covid-19) I want to try to help you with 10 things you can do that will massively help you during these testing times.Prior to listening to this, you may want to check the last episode out which has a further 10 hacks, that will help you during this pandemic too. My goal is to ensure you do not lose momentum or suffer alone in these times. So I sincerely hope these help you.Check out Thursdays episode: things everyone can do during isolation - social distancing for your mental health1. Get help from your local governments. Money along with health is the most feared concept for all people. For its not a concern, but for many it is. So in these times, reach out to your local governments as they will have many ways they can help you. Direct debits etc can also be reduced or stalled from car finance companies etc to really help you during this moment of uncertainty.2. Start with gratitude, isolation is not the end. Isolation is protecting ourselves, but just as importantly protecting those who are vulnerable. I believe with all of my heart if you listen to my podcast, you are like me. You care just as much for others as you do for yourself. If you didn’t, I wouldn’t imagine you’d be sticking around for long. So gratitude for us is a must. We should be grateful we are in a position to help others (even through technically doing nothing). We should be grateful for having a roof over our heads, access to water and toilets/showers. The ability to connect via FaceTime, Skype, WhatsApp or mobiles to all our loved ones too.3. Read some books. Or if you’re like me listen to them. This is a time to enhance your mind without the pressures of being somewhere else or having to do anything else. Books allow us to time collapse our journeys, change our perspectives and just develop. If you want recommendations please let me know, although most of my books are non-fiction personal developments. But even if its a fiction book, knock off those slippers kick back and read to your hearts content.4. Watch this is us. Now I am obviously looking for an endorsement but this show has been incredible. It looks at all the different obstacles and adversities we face in life, from parenting, to racism, to self-image, confidence etc Yet the messages are beautifully scripted and acted out. I literally leave each show with my heart full and head bursting with ideas for blogs and podcast shows to hopefully help you all.5. Recharge your batteries. So often in life we are on autopilot and rarely take a step back to look at our well-being. This is time to sit back, re assess your life and see if the story you are writing is one you want to continue to writing. Would you be happy doing this for the next 10-15 years? If no, then you have such a huge possibility to change your future by starting today. 5 years ago today I would have believed I had to work till I was 65, yet here I am able to connect with you all and do the things that fill my heart more than anything in the world. It took blood sweat and tears but it started with the decision to do so. You have that power to make the decision now, even if you think you don’t.6. Clean! If you’re a guy, do some handy work around the house and clean. You will get yourself some brownie points, but you also have a cleaner house & decluttering helps with your mind space.7. Skype/Zoom people. This is crucial, because although it won’t replace physical social interaction we need to communicate with people, and we do not want to suffer with loneliness. So reach out to your loved ones. Hey reach out to me! I am always active on Instagram and ill try to reach back out to you too.8. Journal. If you are suffering with anxiety in this time, journaling is my #1 tool for combatting overwhelm and anxious feelings. Just throw anything and everything in your head onto paper and watch your brain feel lighter, mood get brighter and smile get wider over time. Its powerful beyond belief!9. Start your day with Find Your Voice Podcast!10. Learn something new. Okay so to date we probably learnt a few celebrities have got coronavirus and that its taking over the world, with people snatching toilet rolls and doing all sorts of crazy habits. Well the time you spend, reading the same information that will only add to your anxiety, perhaps you could randomly research something you’re interested about? How about brain health? How about the benefits of adversity? Or how to cook pad thai? How to exercise at home? It can truly be anything, but time I something we will never got back. Skill sets and new learnings are also things we will always have. SoAlso do not forget to check out our new sponsor coming soon:, Covid-19, Coronavirus is just a phase of adversity we are all capable of overcoming and prospering from.Free Audible book sign up: book on Mindset by Carol Dweck: Mindset the podcast: & check out our new sponsor: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram:

Control the Controllables - How to survive during Corona Isolation

Ep. 91
"Always try to Control the Controllables" by Aren Deu #91In a time of huge uncertainty, where fear is upon many of us, and we often feel helpless, defenceless and desperate we need to ensure we regain control of our lives. We need to eliminate our excuses irrespective of how good or true they may be. We need to overcome this adversity and move forward in life. The best way to do this, is to truly control the controllables and recognise that in the midst of this current climate, with Corona (COVID-19) taking its toll on the world, we still have so much control of the rest of our lives. Our thoughts, bodies and minds are still within our control should we recognise this and work towards ensuring we master it.I urge you all to just listen to this episode or check out the YouTube and really use this time to benefit your life moving forward. If I can help in anyway please do not hesitate to reach out.1. Your sleep routine is so crucial.2. Your nutrition, both hydration and the food you consume.3. How to speak to yourself (especially if your self-isolated). Your thoughts impact your emotions & actions.4. What you choose to listen and watch(I am all for Netflix, and Amazon) but I am so against things that do not serve my mindset.5. How you look after your physical body (Exercise at home) ?6. How you treat others (a dog eat dog world). Let's not act like animals and be kinder and more compassionate and not let desperation take over our values.7. Future proof yourself, if this happens (Formulate a plan and ensure if you are struggling this does not happen again. We have to learn from our moments of adversity and circumstances)8. Levels of gratitude more so now than ever.9. Learn a new skill. Language, online course or something you’ve always wanted to do. Write, blog, podcast do it today!!Covid19, Covid-19, Corona Virus is just a phase of adversity we are all capable of overcoming and prospering from.Also do not forget to check out our new sponsor coming soon: Audible book sign up: book on Mindset by Carol Dweck: Mindset the podcast: & check out our new sponsor: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram:

Grow Your Confidence & Avoid Imposter Syndrome #90

Ep. 90
"You don't need to have it all figured out, you just need to realise your strengths, trust your gut & take action" by Betitina Árnafjall #90Bettina states the following:"It's my heart's desire to share the many experiences I made in my eight years as a team manager to help all you women out there to avoid mistakes, change your mindset and behavior and take your career to the next level" and through this fascinating discussion you can see exactly why.Suffering with confidence issues throughout her own life, imposter syndrome and never really having it all figured out she continued to pursue her desire and develop her passion into serving others. Recognising that none of us have it all figured out, and we all have our doubts and moments of uncertainty she still persevered. She also recognised it was her action and commitment to the process that allowed her to achieve the results she is achieving today.Some areas she specialises in or speaks about are:Confidence is key for your careerDon't confuse loyalty and a false sense of dutyYour career doesn't need to be a "career"The top 5 job search Dos and Don'tsTop 5 things to promote your career as a womanAre there unsuitable jobs for women?The gender gap - a team manager's perspectiveHow not to get paid less as a womanHow to research a realistic salarySalary negotiation tipsHow to get a raiseThis was a fascinating conversation and fortunately we managed to get it recorded this time around.Some Key Time stamps:[02:50] Bettina's own struggles with confidence[07:30] Doing things even when you aren't sure[11:50] My own imposter syndrome with podcasting[23:35] Migraines ruining Bettina's life[29:50] Fun part of the show[33:00] Bettinas final message - How to be successful without a master planI urge you all to follow her journey & check out our new sponsor: Audible book sign up: Carol Dweck Mindset 5 Minute journal: the podcast: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram: https://www.findyourvoicepodcast.comYouTube: to Bettina:Instagram: :

How to Build Confidence - 5 Tips you can do today (Part 2/2)

Ep. 89
"We all lack confidence in certain areas of our life" - Aren Deu #875 Ways to Build Confidence Part 2If you haven't already, you may want to check out i discussed the first 5 things to help build confidence. To quickly recap these included:1 getting things done, 2 exercising, 3, staying true to your word, 4 ensuring you don’t get overwhelmed and 5 recognising the lack of confidence is not exclusive to you and we all, in certain areas of our lives experience it.But please do obviously check it out for an in-depth 10-minute explanation.But for this episode, these are the 5 ways (well 6, with the bonus tip) to help you build your confidence.6. Preparation. One of the ways I managed to handle my public speaking fear, was to be incredibly prepared. Now there is a well known fact that even the most confidence amongst us, such as French Prince of Bel-Air who we all loved and adored if you were an 80/90s baby, can be seen whispering the lines of every single person in the episode before his own lines. Why? It was his first major gig at acting, he wanted to make sure he didn't make mistakes or mess up his opportunity, so he prepared!! For many of us, a lack of confidence can be due to a lack of competencies or knowledge so the best way to get over this, is too just over prepare! I've done it, I still do it and I promise you it will hugely enhance your confidence7. Improve your posture. There is a psychological and physiologically benefits to improving one's posture. If you are trying to negotiate something, or get a point across but you have your shoulders slouched, back hunched over like the dude from Notre dam you are likely 1 not going to portray a confident person, but 2 not even feel it. Put those shoulders back, work on your eye contact and pump that chest out. It may feel stupidly awkward by the way, initially but it's empowering once you recognise people start to take more notice of you.8. Music! Yes, music is one of the best things for our minds and bodies if we choose the right tracks, to empower us. I don’t know about you, but there are some songs that I feel I can genuinely take on the world after it. Either for their lyrics the beat or just the feeling of when I first ever heard that song. I call these power songs. Find your power songs and get them ready before you need to be more confident. Now being fully transparent here, I do this on the way to football matches, or when I spar in boxing because sometimes my anxiety and own self doubts can cripple my performances, but if I can get those tunes playing at the right time, I am usually unstoppable! Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but I usually feel proud of myself as I gave my all without self sabotaging my performance before I even step into the ring or on the field.9. Visualise. There is something magical about visualisation and maybe ill do a podcast on this separately in more depth. But your imagination has the power to boost your confidence massively. Experts believe that mental visualisation practices such as delivering the perfect speech, hitting that home run, successful getting a new client etc, can prepare your brain for the outcome and give you that sense of achievement. Combined with positive affirmations of how you can achieve this, are worthy of achieving this, you can literally accomplish it in your head, mind and body before you actually go out there and do it. Which you will!10. Do something difficult. There is something special about learning to become comfortable whilst actually being uncomfortable. We will never improve ourselves or you will never truly find your voice if you remain in your comfort zone. We need to stretch it, push it, step outside it and learn to wonder in a bit of uncertainty, a bit of uncomfortable to really grow as humans. Overtime, if you consistently do this to yourself, you will quickly start to fell unstoppable and recognise that the things you used to think were impossible, or were going to kill you, harm you, or scare you senseless actually didn’t turn out so bad after all!And just because I think a 3 part episode would be an overkill, I’ve taken 1 more confidence boosting tip to truly help move forward and find your voice:11. Smile at random people. I tried this exercise a few weeks back, but I started in comfortable places like the local gym, where everyone is so polite anyway. So rather than avoiding eye contact like I so often do, I started to look at people in the eyes and just push those cheek up and flash a smile. And guess what? I didn’t die. I didn’t get called a weirdo. I didn't break out in a sweat. I actually got welcoming greetings and smiles back. The benefit of all of that? I had a great work out and more importantly was in such a great mood for the remainder of the day… Smiling is contagious and as much as those people made my day, id like to think my awkward smile did the same!Free Audible book sign up: book on Mindset by Carol Dweck: Mindset the podcast: & check out our new sponsor: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram:

Suicide Prevention, Mental illness Awareness, Body Dysmorphia & so much more ft Bobby Temps #88

Ep. 88
"Over 75% have developed mental illness by the age of 18" by Bobby Temps #88A face to face conversation with one of today's, local mental health advocates who is making huge positive changes in the space. Delighted to welcome Bobby Temps, the host of the Podcast entitled: Mental - The Podcast to Destigmatise Mental Health on to Find Your Voice where I got to know the man himself. Always intrigued as to why people do what they do, I wanted to understand why Bobby does the work he does, for mental health and also to understand where these motivators came from.This was an insightful and thought-provoking interview where we delved into many areas. We discussed the pressures society can place upon us. The pressures our parents can have on our own mental illness. Anxiety, Depression, Loneliness, Burnout and even body dysmorphia. All these can sometimes be very taboo like and we often navigate around them, rather than discussing them But keen to not just be another Mental Health hashtag episode we promised ourselves and each other we would be 100% open and transparent.Realising that we can all internalise things with a different perspective it is always a goal of mine personally to bring on as many people as possible even within the same bracket of adversity that they often highlight shaped their lives. This will in my hope, help you as listeners gain a different method, or perspective of coping and managing your own life.The beautiful thing with this interview, and something I learned midway through it was that a petition has now been signed with over 196,000 signatures, as I write this to help Some Key Time stamps:[04:45] Destigmatise Mental Health / Mental illness[08:40] Family pressures - Bobby[15:50] Family pressures - Aren[23:40] The statistics around Mental illness[30:30] Positive affirmations around Body Dysmorphia [39:15] Mental illness & Trauma you have experienced[45:00] Fun part of the showI urge you all to follow his journey:Free Audible book sign up: Carol Dweck Mindset 5 Minute journal: the podcast: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram: https://www.findyourvoicepodcast.comYouTube: to Bobby:Facebook Page: Mental recommendations:SamaritansSomeone to talk to who really listens with someone always there to pick up the phone. They do not offer advise but a space to speak anonymously about what is on your mind and can signpost other organisations. There number is free and won’t show up on your phone bill.​If you are a student Nightline offers a similar services tailored for you and run by student volunteers -​Bias warning- Bobby used to volunteer here!​Counselling ServicesThere is no definitive route to finding the right service for you, so try googling for your local area. Remember you can always go in for a session and you don’t have to go back if you feel uncomfortable. The NHS also offers counselling but this is in part dependant on your personal situation and there is usually a waiting list.​The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy has a directory for support services on their website with a wide range of 'We help millions of people affected by mental illness by challenging attitudes and lives with information and practical advice.'​ - ‘We're Mind, the mental health charity. We're here to make sure no one has to face a mental health problem alone.’​ ‘We are a growing movement of people changing how we all think and act about mental health problems.’Services relating to topics we coverFor a far broader list of services : starting this petition, we have received support from politicians across the political spectrum and it has reached over 195,000 signatures. Plus the Department of Education, Ofsted and the Welsh Assembly are already working to make these changes a reality.When working to reduce stigma, I am continually concerned how a lack of education around mental health is contributing factor. This is something regularly raised as a mutual concern by guests on my mental health podcast plus several of them are actively working to fill this need by doing talks and workshops in schools. With one in four of us experiencing mental illness every year according to the charity Mind, this seems to be a real and very significant gap in our education system. KEY STATISTICS:​- One in ten children aged between 5 and 16 years has been diagnosed with/shows signs of a mental health problem, and many continue to have these problems into adulthood. (1)- Over half of all mental ill health starts before the age of 14 years, and 75% of this has developed by the age of 18. (2)- NHS England estimates that poor mental health costs the NHS and society £105 billion a year in England alone. (3)The statistics are shocking, yet whilst there is a whole subject in the curriculum around our physical health in the form of PE, our young people are left without any knowledge of even the most common mental illnesses.​Not only does this leave them unprepared and vulnerable when it comes to looking out for their own mental health, but also sets the standard that Mental Health is not discussed. This plants a seed of stigma that many carry for their whole lives.​Upon further research, there generally seems very little in the way of guidelines currently. For example, if Romeo and Juliet is studied as part of the curriculum when the two title characters kill themselves, this is considered the end of the story or worse romanticised as an ideal form of love.The very serious topic of suicide is frequently not even mentioned as part of schooling, and yet according to the BBC, suicide is the biggest killer of men under the age of 49.​It’s time to make a change. Even if a law was passed so every child receives one class about mental health during their time at school, this would be more than the vast majority currently get. We are keen to hear back from those in power on a more extensive plan to better the lives of our nation’s young people.​CAMPAIGNING FOR:​- Mental Health education becoming mandatory teaching for all schools in the UK without the addition of any exams or homework on this subject.​- Every child having the ability to access a qualified counsellor through their school. This is something that many workplaces already offer.​- Every school offering Mental Health training for its staff.​

How to Build Confidence - 5 Tips you can do today (Part 1/2)

Ep. 87
"We all lack confidence in certain areas of our life" - Aren Deu #87Here are 5 Ways to Build Confidence (Part 2 out next week).So firstly what is confidence?Confidence is the feeling or believe that one can have faith or rely on someone or something. A simple enough definition right?But if you are anything like me, throughout my life some things I’ve really wanted to do, or needed to do i’e just not been confident at, and that sucks!So I’ve dissected this episode into 2 parts, as this topic has 1000s of ways to help you, to build you confidence.So let’s get started:1. Get things done. Funnily enough, confidence is not something many of us can just wish into existence. It requires a bit of growth, uncomfortable moments or actually executing on something. Sounds like a tough deal right? Well not really. You see if you truly want to achieve something you don’t have already, or become someone you aren’t already you have to be willing to put the work in, in order to grow. This is where doing things that you can tick of as accomplishments will build your confidence. Even if it just small things, this matters too. Consistently improving or doing things you wouldn’t usually feel confident about, or shy away from over time will build confidence. A great example? Me doing this recording now, 90 episodes in. It feels easier, I worry that bit less, and I am confident in the message and hopefully that shines through. Hopefully.2. Exercise. Now this list wouldn’t be a list without confidence. You see there is something about exercising that can be transferred across all walks of life. The small incremental increases in strength, speed, power, endurance etc is one thing. But how about, starting something (no-one is naturally a professional at) and spending days, hours on end working on the activity to slowly recognise how much better you become at it, how easier those first sessions would be if you were to mimic those? Plus you also benefit from releasing feel good endorphins, enhance your physical appearance and that in itself enhances one's confidence. Look good, feel good!3. Stay true to your word. This is something that over the years has massively built my own personal confidence. Not only will people respect people that say what they do and do what they say, but the most important person in your life will also respect that too. Yes YOU! If you can commit to your words via actions, slowly but surely, you will build confidence in yourself. You will see yourself as someone, irrespective of emotions and feelings, will go out there and do exactly what they say they will do. Do this long enough, you will be as confident as they come.4. Don’t overwhelm yourself. It is easy to want to be confident today, especially if you really suck at it. But it’s a process. Just like finding your voice hey! It takes time, hours, days months or even years. But if you can be patient and remain consistent enough confidence will in itself start to show. I never liked public speaking, and although I have many things I'd prefer to do, I manage it okay now. I never liked taking on the phone, could you believe that? And now, phone calls aren’t too scary. But it takes time, sadly this episode alone won’t just suddenly make you confident5. Know that you aren’t alone. Everyone is confident at certain things and everyone is not so confident at others. We often look at people within the thing we want to pursue or become confident and think that person is incredible. Almost put them on a pedestal assuming they are confident at life as a whole. This is far from the truth. For example. I am confident in physical activities, way more than I am in speaking activities. Yet I am more confident in boxing than I would be in cricket. I am more confident interviewing guests than being a guest myself. We all have particular things that we shine in and others we don't. So the key is to ensure we don’t beat ourselves up and know that everyone has their own journey and everyone has to build confidence in the things that matter or are required for them.Free Audible book sign up: book on Mindset by Carol Dweck: Mindset the podcast: & check out our new sponsor: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram:

How to Control Your Thoughts, Emotions & Practice Self Care to Improve Your Mental Health #86

Ep. 86
"You are NOT your Anger" by Alexander Walker #86Alexander Walker, is a clinical hypnotherapist who works with clients who have or are experiencing depression, bipolar, anxiety and stress. But he fell into this line of work due suffering depression himself, struggling with his own anger and realising he never quite fitted in. Eager to now help others, having dug himself out of his own hole, Alexander helps people on a daily basis. He kindly joined us on the show today, where he shared methods for reducing anxiety and overwhelm; managing anger management and more important recognising that our thoughts are not us. Our emotions are not us. We are not moments of our life, we are much more than that. This insightful perspective of looking at how we often criticise or judge ourselves, can increase our happiness almost instantly.It is for that reason, I encourage you all to listen to this episode, maybe even watch it on YouTube where it is not edited and has a few extra bits thrown in. It will teach you to manage your emotions and thoughts much better, which in turn will enhance your life, improve your happiness and help you find your voice.Let me know your thoughts, and be sure to share this on social media and share it with anyone you feel could benefit from the wisdom Alexander shared.Some Key Time stamps:[04:30] Understanding my own Depression - Alexander[09:00] Controlling your thoughts & bringing in a new experience[14:00] Dealing & Understanding your Anger problems[17:55] Why some people act in a "bad" way[25:30] You are responsible for your world - The HO-OPON-OPONO Technique[31:10] Acknowledge the small wins in your life + Your Journey MattersI urge you all to follow his journey:Free Audible book sign up: Carol Dweck Mindset 5 Minute journal: the podcast: to me:Website: https://www.arendeu.comInstagram: https://www.findyourvoicepodcast.comYouTube: to Alexander:Facebook Page: :