The Upshot

Chelsea in chaos, Nicolas Pepe’s pornstar girlfriend and a Russian chess star poisons her rival mid-gameJoin Zach and Jack for another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Videos from the pod:Chelsea’s 42 man squad in the gym: https://x.com/SwearingSport/status/1824520610606878743/video/1Todd Boehly’s crazy transfer spend: https://x.com/Kaspitalize/status/1823704637498601868/photo/1Ronaldinho’s son filming training sessions at Barca: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GKlwlDzboAAzo5Q.jpgMcBurnie aftersun: https://estaticos-cdn.prensaiberica.es/clip/c210ce8c-bbf8-4103-8bdf-a9d11e92edc7_16-9-aspect-ratio_default_1320477.jpgOli McBurnie stamping on fan’s phone: https://x.com/SufcLuke_/status/1391505893544562690 YouGov poll of Brits who think they’d qualify for Olympics: https://yougov.co.uk/sport/articles/50301-a-quarter-of-britons-think-they-could-qualify-for-the-2028-olympicsAngel di Maria looking skinny and weird: https://talksport.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/5/2020/05/GettyImages-473987402-1-e1588752172996.jpg?strip=all&quality=100&w=1920&h=1440&crop=1Aguero cocaine enquiry: https://www.instagram.com/p/C-huVn7Iq_W/ Chess player poisoning the board with mercury: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPFV0yBB_X4

The Arsenal dressing room of the 1990s was absolutely mental. It was ruled by a riotous ring of badly-behaved boozers like Tony Adams, Paul Merson and Ray Parlour. They called themselves "The Tuesday Club".From machete-wielding gangsters to stints in the slammer, this is the tale of Gooners Gone Wild…Links from the pod:Ray Parlour aged 12: https://x.com/football_mumble/status/1271410319848587264 Charlie Nicholas’ awful banter with Jeff Stelling: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c5FsadHcoVA Ray Parlour cobra bomb: https://x.com/UpshotTowers/status/1574720819187564546

Managers caught in brothels, Wayne Rooney’s x-rated team talks, and is Vincent Kompany an absolute bastard?Join Zak Attak ‘n Coopz for another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Videos from the pod:Vincent Kompany bollocking Gudmundsson: https://x.com/secondtierpod/status/1822932103379464543 Non-league manager having a pint in an interview: https://www.instagram.com/p/C-kviZuInhO/

At 20 years old, Jamie Vardy was playing eighth tier football with an ankle tag on. And at 24, he was still working at a prosthetic limbs factory.Five years later he was a Premier League champion.From skittles vodka every night to the Wagatha Christie saga, this is the far-fetched fairytale of a Premier League legend…Links from the pod:Play off semi-final against Watford 2013: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJYtDPcd-fU Nigel Pearson strangling James McArthur: https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=342055126509288Pearson calling journalist an ostrich: https://youtu.be/4xfdk3MliFc?si=auo9JQRzfbehtxJm&t=16 Vardy’s daughter playing rock, paper, scissors: https://youtu.be/OP7vlyxxBtM?si=zQLn0Tudt644Tz_q&t=22 Vardy courtroom sketch: https://i2-prod.dailystar.co.uk/incoming/article26992221.ece/ALTERNATES/s615b/1_FS-k5s3XsAEBRCX.jpgRooney courtroom sketch: https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2022/05/18/14/57878627-10828547-Coleen_Rooney_sits_next_to_her_husband_Wayne_Rooney_on_May_12_in-a-1_1652880025532.jpg

Pole Vaulters doing porn, Neil Lennon’s Bucharest bender and the turd-riddled Seine claims its first victims. It’s another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Videos from the pod:Dutch runner who sounds like Mickey Mouse: https://www.tiktok.com/@almost.co/video/7346062164878298401?lang=enHungover pole vault winner: https://x.com/SiavoushF/status/1820812332722688141Steve McClaren’s dutch accent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZnoP4sUV90 Irish rowers interview: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFvT-KoGgEM The Kloppelganger: https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/comments/1ei6vqj/shakhtar_donetsk_on_twitter_clarifies_no_its_not/Pole vaulter’s knob denies him spot in final: https://twitter.com/pauloMDtweets/status/1819714571688677404

The year is 776BC. A naked man soaked in olive oil is being flogged senseless after false starting in the pentathlon.Two millennia later, in a sleepy corner of Oxfordshire, civilised adults are clubbing each other to death in the name of Olympic revival.From contestants eaten by wolves to Eric the Eel, this is the unhinged 3,000 year history of the Olympic Games…Links from the pod:Eric the Eel at Sydney 2000: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0ZePJy_nZw 

Ederson’s hissy fit. Trouble in paradise for Lamine Yamal. And “sex marathons” in the Olympic Village.It’s another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Videos from the pod:Rene the piss goblin made it to Korea: https://www.instagram.com/p/C8_5WCCJPlN/Lamine Yamal’s girlfriend BETRAYS him: https://x.com/ayeejuju/status/1817596869997908328Get ya coffee: http://www.Angliacoffeesolutions.co.uk

The Romans wrestled lions, the Victorians forced monkeys to fight dogs. And in the modern era, we tuck into a bit of artistic swimming and pretend to know what a pommel horse is.But the Olympics is far more than just a freakshow of sobbing sprinters, doped up communists and Swiss aristocrats forcing horses to dance.From poolside punch ups to Usain Bolt’s ultraslow shagging technique, this is the Upshot’s guide to Paris 2024…

Multiple shagging rumours about England stars. Patrice Evra’s jail sentence. GB swimming turns saucy. And George debuts his Wimbledon-themed erotic fan fiction.It’s another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Videos from the pod:Tom Daley’s saucy Insta caption: https://www.instagram.com/p/C9uw4y5Nbor/?img_index=1Argentina racist song: https://x.com/NosyBuzzer/status/1813264257506812245Mbappe and Ines Rau frolicking: https://english.cdn.zeenews.com/sites/default/files/2024/01/02/1344423-aus-8.pngAsparagus woman predicting a female president: https://x.com/DannyParkinson/status/1815084737519591547David Moyes on Carsley and Gravesen: https://youtu.be/JDxd0d3l6eg?si=HcHLvtlfY0oFPUVt&t=2831Patrice Evra’s prison vid: https://www.instagram.com/p/C9VarmTSG9A/