Share

The Beauty in the Mess
Ep. 99 Unlocking the Secrets to Fulfilling Relationships with Michelle Hoffmann
Host Michele welcomes relationship coach, Michelle Hoffmann, to discuss the profound intricacies of forming and maintaining healthy relationships. They delve into the importance of understanding and learning from life's messes to fast-track personal growth. Michelle shares invaluable insights into aligning core values, communication skills, and the importance of being 'relationship ready.' The conversation also covers techniques for reigniting the spark in long-term relationships and emphasizes the significance of developing a strong relationship with oneself.
Michelle's journey from widowhood, sole parent and single to profound insight into human dynamics has been transformative. Having experienced the depths of loneliness and the highs of finding love, building a life, and navigating loss, she now empowers others to embark on their own journey to love and genuine connection. Through a simple process born from her personal experiences and expertise, Michelle has helped countless individuals transition from loneliness to love.
02:40 Introduction
02:57 The Value of Shared Experiences
04:32 Michelle's Journey to Becoming a Relationship Coach
07:31 Finding the Right Partner
09:06 Coping with Loss and Helping Others
10:34 Writing the Book and Becoming a Coach
11:52 Navigating Relationships During the Pandemic
15:37 The Importance of Being Relationship Ready
17:15 Understanding Authentic Self in Relationships
20:02 The Three Steps to a Positive Relationship
28:22 Helping Socially Awkward Individuals
30:09 The Chemistry, Casual, and Committed Phases
38:06 Revitalizing Long-Term Relationships
40:21 Embarking on New Adventures
40:39 Philanthropy and Travel
41:06 The Chemistry of Relationships
42:18 Understanding Self-Relationship
43:58 The Seven Essentials for Balance
45:36 Attachment Styles and Their Impact
47:19 Building Secure Attachments
61:57 Navigating Grief and Loss
01:09:18 The Art of Relationshipping
Connect with Michelle Hoffmann:
· https://WWW.Relationshipping101.com
· https://theartofrelationshipping.com/
· https://www.thewidowguide.com
· https://newmanagementblueprint.com/
· https://WWW.MichelleHoffmanncoach.com
Let's Connect!
· The Beauty In The Mess
· https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906
· https://thebeautyinthemess.com/
· https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/
More episodes
View all episodes
113. Ep. 113 You Can't Pour From An Empty Cup: A Wellness Wake-Up Call with Sarina Helen
51:34||Season 4, Ep. 113In this soul-nourishing episode, Michele Simms welcomes holistic wellness coach and entrepreneur Sarina Helen, the powerhouse behind The Juice Parlor in Los Angeles. Sarina opens up about her decade-long struggle with burnout and how it ultimately led her to a deeper journey of self-connection, self-worth, and inner alignment. Her story is proof that we can’t pour into others until we start filling ourselves first.From green juices to mindset shifts, Sarina shares the essential tools that helped her heal—physically, emotionally, and spiritually—and now she helps other women do the same through her holistic coaching. Whether you're navigating stress, trying to break toxic patterns, or simply looking for a path to more energy and peace, this conversation is a permission slip to start again.[0:02] Sarina’s early wellness journey and founding The Juice Parlor[0:04] Burnout, perfectionism, and the turning point[0:07] Why your external world reflects your internal state[0:09] Breaking cycles of hustle, people-pleasing, and disconnection[0:12] Learning to redefine health, purpose, and peace[0:14] Building self-awareness and reclaiming your worth[0:17] Emotional and physical detox—how they go hand in hand[0:20] The role of breathwork, stillness, and daily rituals[0:23] Creating space to hear your intuition[0:26] Why women often feel “not enough”—and how to come back home to self[0:29] Making small aligned choices that lead to lasting change[0:32] What real vitality looks and feels like[0:35] Free resources and support for your journey[0:37] Sarina’s final words of encouragement🎁 Free Gift for Listeners:Download Sarina’s Vitality Detox Guide and start your journey to a more vibrant, aligned you:👉 https://www.bewellbysarina.com/The-Vitality-Detox-GuideConnect with Sarina Helen:Website: www.bewellbysarina.comInstagram: @bewellbysarinaConnect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community💬 If this episode spoke to your heart, share it with a friend who could use some gentle encouragement. You are not alone, and you’re never too far gone to come back home to yourself.#HealingJourney #TheBeautyInTheMess #WellnessPodcast #SarinaHelen #SelfLove #HolisticWellness112. Ep. 112 Redefining Healing with Amy Lenius
58:24||Season 4, Ep. 112In this powerful episode, Michele Simms sits down with Amy, a holistic healing advocate who turned her decades-long battle with chronic illness into a mission to help others align with their inner peace, self-worth, and true potential. Amy opens up about the journey from surviving to thriving and how healing the internal world impacts everything on the outside.She shares how self-awareness, holistic practices, and small daily shifts can lead to deep transformation. Whether you're dealing with illness, emotional burnout, or just trying to find your way back to yourself, Amy’s honest wisdom will resonate.[00:02:20] Amy's background and journey with chronic illness [00:04:35] What led her to holistic healing [00:06:45] The connection between internal and external environments [00:09:05] Breaking free from limiting beliefs and cycles [00:11:15] Defining health, success, and peace on your own terms [00:13:25] Why awareness is the gateway to change [00:15:40] Building self-belief and self-worth [00:17:50] How healing is never linear [00:20:10] The myth of being “broken” [00:22:20] Learning to tune into your body’s signals [00:24:30] What true self-care looks like beyond trends [00:26:45] Amy’s message to anyone feeling stuck or overwhelmed [00:29:00] Final thoughts on purpose and alignment🔗 Connect with Amy Lenius🔗 Instagram: @amylynnwellness📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this episode helped you feel seen or sparked something new, share it with someone who needs it. You’re not alone — and you’re never too far gone to begin again.#HealingJourney #HolisticLiving #TheBeautyInTheMess #AmyLenius #SelfDiscovery 💬 Rate & Review· Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!111. Ep. 111 Trauma, Healing, and Finding The Urgency To Change with Blanca E. Rodriguez
52:47||Season 4, Ep. 111In this powerful episode of The Beauty in the Mess, host Michele Simms talks with Blanca E. Rodriguez, Owner/CEO of Wounded Healer, LLC. Blanca shares how early trauma—including the murder of her father, sexual assault, and generational silence—led to years of darkness, but ultimately inspired a life of healing, service, and transformation.Blanca is a holistic life coach, licensed massage therapist, Amazon bestselling co-author, and passionate speaker. She mentors through Toastmasters and volunteers with organizations like The Inner Truth Project and The Pet Cottage. Her story is a compelling reminder that no matter your past, change is possible—and healing can begin today.[00:02:15] Blanca’s early life and Puerto Rican roots[00:04:20] Losing her father and the trauma that followed[00:06:30] Silence, shame, and victimhood[00:08:45] Breaking the cycle for her children[00:10:50] Trauma, mental illness, and generational pain[00:13:00] Taking ownership and reclaiming her story[00:15:10] How motherhood inspired deep change[00:17:20] Repeating patterns and toxic relationships[00:19:25] Urgency as a turning point[00:21:30] Discovering massage therapy and holistic healing[00:24:00] Understanding the mind-body-soul connection[00:26:05] Breathwork, stress, and healing tools[00:28:15] Caring for her mother with advanced dementia[00:30:30] Trauma’s long-term physical effects[00:32:45] Procrastination, self-worth, and fear of change[00:35:00] Starting small and building lasting habits[00:37:10] Why you shouldn’t do it alone[00:39:20] The life-changing power of having a coach[00:41:30] Forgiving her mother and herself[00:46:00] From surviving to thriving[00:48:15] Blanca’s free coaching session offer[00:49:50] Where to connect with Blanca online🌟 Connect with Blanca E. Rodriguez:Website: www.woundedhealerblancae.comEmail: woundedhealer.blancae@gmail.comInstagram: @woundedhealer.blancaeFacebook (Personal): Blanca E. RodriguezFacebook (Business): WoundedHealer.BlancaETikTok / Threads: @woundedhealer.blancaeLinkedIn: Blanca E. Rodriguez💌 To book your free coaching session with Blanca, send her a direct message on any platform above.📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this conversation moved you or reminded you you're not alone, please share it. You never know who might need to hear it today.. #TheBeautyInTheMess #WoundedHealer #HealingIsPossible #Forgiveness #LifeAfterTrauma #BlancaE.Rodriguez #HolisticHealing #RealConversations #ResilientWomen #UrgencyToHeal110. Ep. 110 What If The Person You Loved Most Was The One Quietly Erasing You with Mia Hanks
39:12||Season 4, Ep. 110In this gripping and courageous episode, Michele talks with Mia Hanks, a survivor of 29 years of covert narcissistic abuse. Now an author and advocate, Mia opens up about the subtle manipulation, control, and emotional gaslighting that kept her trapped in an invisible prison for nearly three decades.Through her memoir Bride Made and her growing public platform, Mia is shining a light on what so many silently endure, and showing that freedom and healing are possible. Whether you’ve been through something similar or want to better understand and support someone who has, this conversation will stay with you.[02:20] – Mia shares her story: 29 years married to a covert narcissist [04:40] – What narcissistic abuse really looks like (and why it’s misunderstood) [07:10] – How narcissism develops and why lack of empathy is the red flag [09:30] – Total control: from finances to sleep and time [12:00] – Why covert narcissists are the hardest to spot — and most dangerous [14:30] – Can narcissists change? And why most don’t [17:00] – The silent weapon of gaslighting and how it erodes self-trust [19:45] – How abuse affects children and family dynamics [22:10] – When physical symptoms show up from emotional stress [24:40] – Is it narcissism, sociopathy, or something worse? [27:00] – Why victims normalize abuse — and how to begin seeing clearly [29:30] – Preparing to leave: finances, fear, and finding support [32:00] – Mia’s exit strategy: what worked and what she wishes she knew [34:40] – What helped most in healing: therapy, writing, and sharing [37:10] – Learning to trust again, set boundaries, and rebuild self-worth [39:50] – How covert narcissists protect their image through smear campaigns [42:20] – Writing her memoir Bride Made — and why it’s not just for survivors [44:40] – Final message: you’re not stuck — there’s life and healing after abuse🔗 Connect with Mia Hanks:Website: miajhanks.comMemoir: Bride Made (available everywhere books are sold)Instagram: @mia.j.hanksBlog coming soonBride Made: A Memoir is available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target, Walmart, and more.📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this episode helped you feel seen or sparked something new, share it with someone who needs it. You’re not alone — and you’re never too far gone to begin again. #TheBeautyInTheMess #MiaHanks #NarcissisticAbuseRecovery #BrideMade #CovertNarcissism #Gaslighting #EmotionalHealing #WomensVoices 💬 Rate & Review· Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!109. Ep. 109 You Can't Love Others More Than You Love Yourself with Dr. Mark A. Hicks
59:57||Season 4, Ep. 109In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, Michele sits down with Dr. Mark A. Hicks, counselor, speaker, and author of Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last. With decades of experience in psychology, divinity, and human relationships, Dr. Hicks offers real, accessible guidance on how to truly love, starting with yourself.He shares his personal story of loss and renewal, along with a five-part framework for building stronger, healthier, more fulfilling connections — whether with your partner, kids, friends, or even coworkers. This conversation is heartfelt, deeply relatable, and filled with tools for anyone who’s ever wondered: “Can I really learn to love well… even after the mess?”[02:20] – Meet Dr. Mark Hicks and what led him to write Learning Love [05:40] – Why love is a skill, not just a feeling [09:10] – His five components of learning love (G.E.A.P.P.) [12:30] – Why grief is the starting point for healthy connection [15:45] – Understanding emotional literacy and why it matters [19:10] – How practical love helps relationships last [22:25] – The role of acceptance in healing relationships [25:30] – Passion isn’t about fireworks — it’s about presence [28:40] – “You can’t love someone more than you love yourself” [32:15] – How your self-talk shapes your relationships [35:30] – What healthy love looks like in parenting [38:50] – Loving again after loss, betrayal, or divorce [42:00] – Why love isn’t reserved for the lucky — it’s for the willing [45:10] – Final thoughts: You are worthy of learning love🔗 Connect with Dr. Mark A. Hicks:📘 Book: Learning Love: Building a Life That Matters and Healthy Relationships That Last💻 Website: drmarkahicks.com📸 Instagram: @drmarkahicks💬 Facebook: Mark Hicks – Learning Love📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community🎧 If this episode resonated, don’t forget to follow, review, and share. Love is a journey — and you don’t have to walk it alone.#TheBeautyInTheMess #LearningLove #MarkAHicks #SelfWorth #HealthyRelationships #EmotionalHealth #HealingAfterHeartbreak #RelationshipTools💬 Rate & Review· Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!108. Ep. 108 What If The Most Intimate Relationship You Have Is With Yourself with Erica Wiederlight
54:37||Season 4, Ep. 108In this episode of The Beauty In The Mess, Michele talks with Erica Wiederlight, confidence coach, embodiment expert, and founder of We The Light, LLC. Erica helps women go from disconnected and burned out to fully present, joyful, and confident — not through pressure or perfection, but through presence and pleasure. Erica shares how self-love can start in the middle of chaos, how pleasure is about so much more than sex, and why micro-moments of embodiment might be the most healing practice we have. Her message is loud and clear: You don’t have to be fixed to be fabulous — you just have to start where you are. [02:30] – Meet Erica Wiederlight and how her “mess” led to her mission [06:00] – From performer to coach: what burnout revealed [09:15] – What embodiment really means — and why it matters[12:30] – Why pleasure isn’t selfish and how it heals[15:45] – Micro-moments of self-connection (yes, even with kids screaming in the back)[18:15] – You don’t need a retreat to feel worthy — you just need a breath[21:30] – Erica’s favorite tools to calm the nervous system and get present[25:00] – The truth about confidence (it’s not about being loud or perfect)[28:30] – Embodiment and healing when you’re burned out and tired[31:45] – How to stop waiting for permission and take up space[35:00] – Final thoughts on starting small, practicing daily, and trusting yourself 📚 Connect with Erica:Website: wethelight.orgInstagram: @wethelight_llcPodcast: Welcome to the Wiederlife📱 Connect with Michele Simms:Website: thebeautyinthemess.comInstagram: @the.beauty.in.the.messFacebook Group: The Beauty in the Mess Community💬 Rate & Review· Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!107. Ep. 107 What If Fear Wasn't Something To Run From But Something to Push You Further with Utkarsh Narang
34:20||Season 4, Ep. 107In this episode, Michele sits down with Utkarsh Narang, an executive coach, TEDx speaker, and founder of Ignited Neurons, for a deep, honest conversation about identity, fear, and fulfillment. With a background encompassing physiotherapy, content creation, and startup leadership, Utkarsh has lived many lives, and each reinvention taught him how to strip away false identities and show up with intentionality. Now, he helps others do the same. This episode explores what it means to live aligned with your values, how to embrace fear as a guidepost, and why presence — not perfection — is the most powerful discipline of all. [02:05] – Intro to Utkarsh: From physiotherapist to executive coach[06:10] – Letting go of your job title and rediscovering who you really are[10:25] – When discomfort becomes the doorway to growth[14:45] – Fear as fuel: how Utkarsh reframed anxiety into action[18:00] – The “last lunch” metaphor: living each moment like it matters[21:35] – The five values that anchor Utkarsh’s life and work[25:00] – Real discipline vs. performative motivation[29:15] – The trap of chasing goals without checking alignment[32:40] – How presence outperforms pressure every time[36:10] – Journaling, parenting, and practicing what you teach[39:45] – Why most people avoid stillness — and how to embrace it[43:20] – Redefining success: from impact to intention 🔗 Connect with Utkarsh Narang:🌐 Website: ignitedneurons.com📸 Instagram: @ignitedneurons💼 LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/utkarsh-narang🎥 YouTube: Ignited Neurons Channel 🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/ 💬 Rate & Review Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!106. Ep. 106 What If Your Hair Loss Isn’t Just About Genetics or Age, But A Wakeup Call From Your Body with Saril Vasquez
54:31||Season 4, Ep. 106In this episode of The Beauty in the Mess, host Michele is joined by Saril Vasquez, a triple-certified functional medicine practitioner and the founder of Belle Organix and the Bellechanics Method.After a decade of struggling with hair loss and being told there was no cure, Saril discovered something deeper: her body was trying to speak — and hair loss was the message. The solution wasn’t in prescriptions or topicals, but in identifying the root dysfunctions and restoring her system naturally.Now, Saril helps women around the world reverse hair loss through detoxification, gut healing, hormone balance, and personalized nutrition. This conversation will challenge everything you thought you knew about hair loss, and offer real hope for those who’ve been told “this is just how it is.”[02:30] – Meet Saril: Her personal journey with hair loss and functional medicine[05:30] – Why toxins, hormone imbalances, and scar tissue are major root causes[08:45] – Hair loss as a detox mechanism: what your body is trying to say[11:15] – Estrogen dominance, liver health, and the surprising role of bowel movements[14:30] – Breakups, birth control, and the emotional spark that led to healing[17:45] – Scar tissue: how it strangles follicles and how to reverse it[21:00] – Functional medicine vs. conventional approaches to alopecia[24:15] – Why your hair follicles likely aren’t “dead” — just buried under dysfunction[27:30] – How stress and sugar instantly impact hair health[30:45] – The five non-negotiables for reversing hair loss naturally[34:00] – How Saril supports balance without perfection[37:30] – Why no two women get the same plan[41:00] – The power of group coaching and real-life results[44:15] – Why castor oil on the liver beats castor oil on the scalp[47:30] – Busting the “it’s just genetics” myth[50:00] – What every woman should know about her body and healing🔗 Connect with Saril Vasquez: Website: bellechanics.com Free Book: Becoming a Bellechanic Take the Quiz: bellechanics.com/quiz Facebook Group: Reversing Hair Loss Naturally Instagram: @bellechanics Testimonials & Before/After: bellechanics.com/testimonials🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty in the Mess: Website: thebeautyinthemess.com Facebook Group: Join the Community LinkedIn: Michele Simms Instagram: @the.beauty.in.the.mess105. Ep. 105 What If You Have Been Chasing The Wrong Version of Success All Along with Nina Zapala
01:20:56||Season 4, Ep. 105What if the version of success you’ve been chasing… was never really yours?In this powerful episode of The Beauty In The Mess, host Michele sits down with Nina Zapala — award-winning hospitality professional, speaker, author, and the creator of Spiritual Personality Typing — a modern, mystical reimagining of traditional personality systems.After decades in high-powered branding and luxury travel, Nina had what she calls a “life tsunami.” Everything fell apart — and yet, everything began. Her breakdown became a breakthrough, one that led her to help women rediscover the WHO of who they really are: not society’s version, but their real, unfiltered self.Together, we explore:How burnout may be your soul’s signal to realignWhy fulfillment leads to purpose — not the other way aroundThe surprising way your personality type holds spiritual wisdomWhat it means to follow your “North Star” trait and finally feel at home in yourselfWith humor, heart, and so much truth, Nina invites us to slow down, tune in, and stop outsourcing our answers. If you’ve ever wondered who you really are beneath the hustle — this conversation is for you. [02:40] – Meet Nina Zapala [06:00] – The onstage moment that sparked a total life unraveling [10:15] – Why “success” didn’t feel like success — and what came next [14:30] – What is Spiritual Personality Typing, and how is it different? [18:50] – The "North Star trait" and why it matters more than dominance [24:00] – Hearing your soul’s whispers vs. your ego’s demands [29:10] – How your personality shows up in travel, relationships, and resistance [34:30] – The myths of authenticity and the truth about fulfillment [38:45] – Learning to trust yourself — even when no one else gets it [43:00] – Women, aging, and being unapologetically audacious [47:20] – Nina’s book Unpack Your Personality and how travel can reveal the real you[52:00] – Everyday steps to reconnect with your inner voice[56:30] – Final thoughts: You’re not broken — you’re buried under conditioning 🔗 Connect with Nina ZapalaWebsite: https://www.ninazapala.comBook: Unpack Your Personality: Let Your Inner Guide Be Your Travel Guide Nina’s rescued poodle: Oliver (yes, he gets a shoutout!) Learn more about Spiritual Personality Typing on Nina’s blog🔗 Connect with Michele Simms at The Beauty In The MessWebsite: https://thebeautyinthemess.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/676609323457906LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-simms-mba-a061b96a/Instagram: https:/www.instagram.com/the.beauty.in.the.mess/· 💬 Rate & Review· Loved this episode? Please consider leaving a 5-star review and sharing it with a friend!