Stress Mess: Laughing Through Trauma

Episode Summary:In this episode, we dive deep into the topic of childhood trauma—what it is, how it manifests in adulthood, and the ways it can shape our beliefs, behaviors, and relationships. Katie shares personal experiences and professional insights, exploring the spectrum of trauma, from overt events to the absence of emotional safety and connection. The episode also covers common adult adaptations, the importance of self-compassion, and how coaching can support healing and growth.Key Topics Covered:Defining childhood trauma: not just big events, but also the absence of safety, attunement, and connection.Personal stories of growing up with emotional neglect and the impact on self-worth and relationships.The spectrum of trauma: from abuse and chaos to neglect, perfectionism, and parentification.How trauma is a state of overwhelm without support, not just a single event.Common adult patterns: people-pleasing, hypervigilance, fear of conflict, over-responsibility, and difficulty setting boundaries.The process of internalizing adult messages and forming limiting beliefs in childhood.The role of the nervous system and body in carrying trauma responses into adulthood.The importance of repair, self-compassion, and learning new ways to create safety and connection as adults.How coaching and somatic techniques can help process and heal from childhood trauma.Notable Quotes:"Trauma is not an event. It's how alone we felt in that event.""Our adaptations are brilliant and beautiful, and now as adults we get to learn how to befriend ourselves.""Childhood trauma does not have to be a life sentence."Resources & Contact:Instagram: @KatieOStressCoachingEmail: info@oakmountainmh.comIf this episode brings up strong feelings or memories, please reach out for support.If you resonated with this episode or have questions, connect with Katie for a chat about support or coaching. Stay tuned for more episodes diving deeper into specific patterns and healing strategies.

In this episode, Katie sits down with physical therapist Lisa Becker-Schmall, whose work centers on women’s health, pelvic floor conditions, and chronic illness. Together, they unpack the mind-body connection, how physical and emotional pain overlap, and how providers can recognize when it’s time to collaborate or refer clients for additional support.What We CoverLisa’s work in pelvic health, hypermobility, dysautonomia, and women’s health across life stagesWhy replicating pain in an evaluation helps guide treatmentWhen pain isn’t physical—and how emotional, relational, or trauma-related factors can show up as physical symptomsThe vulnerability of seeking help for pelvic pain and how to hold space with careHow PTs and mental health providers can collaborate without crossing scopesThe importance of asking open, supportive questions when heavier emotional content arisesReal examples of pain linked to emotional experiences, grief, and unresolved narrativesHow to know whether you need physical care, mental/emotional support, or bothWhy finding providers who “vibe” with you matters—and that it’s okay to seek someone who aligns with your needsKey TakeawayPhysical pain is often influenced by emotional and psychological layers—and healing is most effective when providers work collaboratively, stay in their lane, and refer when needed. If something feels “missing” in your care, it’s okay to seek someone who sees the whole picture.Connect with LisaInstagram: @lisa.b.schmall — DMs welcome for connection or inquiries.Connect with KatieInstagram: @katieostresscoaching — and don't forge to subscribe and follow for future episodes!

In this guided practice, we explore the “emotional flare-up hangover”—the shame, guilt, and looping thoughts that often follow a reactive moment. Instead of beating yourself up, this episode walks you through moving from shame → understanding → repair with compassion.What We CoverWhy shame spirals happen after emotional flare-upsHow survival responses override “I should have known better”Grounding the body through breath and simple affirmationsNaming what happened without judgmentUnderstanding the protective parts within youShifting into curiosity: What signs did I miss? What could help next time?Repairing with yourself and others using clear, gentle accountabilityKey TakeawayYou’re not striving for perfection—you’re learning to show up with awareness. Your reactions aren’t your identity, and giving your protective parts compassion is a powerful step toward repair.Connect with KatieDon't forget to subscribe and follow on Instagram for more: @katieostresscoaching

In this solo episode, Katie reflects on a quote by London-based psychotherapist Sirit Chawla:“I’m not the monk on the mountain. I’m in the trenches with you.”Katie shares how this perspective shapes her work as a trauma and chronic stress coach. She explores why true healing isn’t about being “fixed” by an expert but about building connection, safety, and understanding.She also discusses the pressure providers feel to have all the answers, how shame keeps people stuck, and why authenticity and compassion are essential in any healing relationship.Key TakeawaysHealing happens through connection, not fixing.Providers don’t need to have it all together to be effective.Speaking shame aloud with understanding is deeply healing.Growth requires patience, guidance, and honest connection.Connect with KatieFollow along on Instagram @katieostresscoaching and online at www.oakmountainmh.com

In this heartfelt and hilariously honest episode, Katie O’Leary sits down with Amber Grimmett, founder of Fierce, Not Fragile.Together, they dive into the beauty and chaos of personal growth, the power of owning your story, and how laughter can transform even the toughest seasons. This is an episode full of warmth, truth, and the kind of friendship that reminds you healing doesn’t have to be quiet or perfect. 💛 In This Episode:How Amber built Fierce, Not Fragile to empower women to reclaim their strengthWhy humor and authenticity are essential tools for healingLetting go of perfection and showing up as your real selfThe gift of friendship and creative collaboration👩‍💼 About the Guest:Amber Grimmett is the founder of Fierce, Not Fragile, dedicated to helping women step into their confidence, own their stories, and live boldly. She is a head coach who is a passionate advocate for women embracing their strength.You can connect with Amber on Instagram @fierce.not.fragile and Katie is on Instagram as @katieostresscoaching

In this raw and deeply honest episode, Katie sits down with powerlifting coach & clinician, John Flagg. The very first person who helped her find and use her voice during one of the hardest seasons of her life. What follows is a conversation that pulls no punches. Touching on trauma, the power of presence, emotional regulation, and what it really means to hold space for someone without trying to fix them.Together, they explore:The moment John unknowingly became the catalyst for this very podcastWhy saying “I’m proud of you” might land the wrong way.. and what to say insteadHow to support someone through pain without needing to fix or rescue themReframing emotions as messages, not problemsThe underrated magic of curiosity over judgmentUsing the barbell as a mirror for emotional and mental healthThe phrase that helps re-center when things feel out of control: “Control the controllables”If you're someone trying to show up more fully for yourself and the people you love, this episode will challenge you to rethink how you listen, how you lead, and how you heal.Connect with John FlaggInstagram: @john.rebuild_strongerWebsite: https://rebuildstronger.netConnect with Katie O'Leary, LPCInstagram: @katieostresscoachingWebsite: www.oakmountainmh.comIf this episode resonated with you, don't forget to share it with someone you love or leave a review!

Have you ever been told to “just be more confident” — but no matter how many affirmations you say in the mirror, it just doesn’t feel true? That’s because confidence, healing, and self-worth can’t live in the mind alone. In this episode, Katie dives deep into why the body is essential in trauma healing — and what happens when we focus only on talk therapy and cognitive awareness without including the body.Katie breaks down the difference between narrative memory (what we know happened) and procedural memory (what the body remembers), showing how trauma responses like freezing, pleasing, or shutting down are rooted in the body’s learned survival mechanisms.You’ll hear real client examples, learn what it means to “update” the body’s memory, and discover how integrating somatic (body-based) techniques — like pendulation and bilateral stimulation — can help you truly feel safety, confidence, and trust from the inside out.Don't forget to subscribe and follow along on Instagram @katieostresscoaching.

In this powerful and deeply personal episode, Katie sits down with Dr. Jocelyn Wallace—a pelvic health coach who helps women heal from hysterectomies, pelvic floor injuries, and chronic gynecological conditions such as fibroids and endometriosis.Together, they explore the connection between childhood trauma, body image, and long-term health, and how survival responses from early life often shape our relationship with food, our bodies, and the healthcare system.Jocelyn shares her personal story of growing up with severe fibroids, navigating bullying, emotional suppression, disordered eating, and the eventual turning point that led her to reclaim her body through strength training and health coaching.This episode is a must-listen for anyone who’s struggled with trusting their body, has a history of chronic stress or trauma, or wants to understand how deeper emotional wounds can manifest physically—and how healing is still possible.Connect with Dr. Jocelyn WallaceInstagram: @drjocelynwallaceWebsite: www.drjocelynwallace.comConnect with Katie O'Leary, LPCInstagram: @katieostresscoachingWebsite: www.oakmountainmh.comIf this episode resonated with you, don't forget to share it with someone you love or leave a review!