Strangers on the Internet

Award-winning screenwriter and author L.L. Kirchner takes Irina and Michelle through the whirlwind of her life in this episode you will not want to miss. While living in Qatar, L.L. received a phone call from her husband announcing that he wanted a divorce. Afraid that she would spiral back into substance addiction, L.L. promptly decided to take a spiritual journey to India where she quit smoking cigarettes as soon as she landed and threw herself into yoga and meditation, even visiting a sex cult at one point. L.L. tells it all, from the start of her eventually babysitting-funded alcoholism that started at age ten (later on adding other drugs) to the dating column and matchmaking experiment she ran for an alternative newspaper. After some online dating adventures of her own in NYC, did she really end up finding love with Florida Man?? Come find out!L.L. Kirchner's websiteL.L's InstagramL.L.'s book "Blissful Thinking: A Memoir of Overcoming the Wellness Revolution"L.L's book "American Lady Creature: (My) Change in the Middle East"SOTI ep. 46: Dating While Sober with Felicia HermleSOTI ep. 43: Exclusive Interview with Comedian Allison Goldberg

On this episode, Irina and Michelle interview marketing consultant Serise Lange, who moderates the popular Facebook group Women's Personal Finance. How do finances impact dating, and how do we figure out who should pay for what? What does Serise think about folks who send out a Venmo request after a date did not go as desired? And what exactly are "hobosexuals"? We learn from Serise's wisdom not only about money but also emotional wellbeing generally!Serise Lange's TwitterWomen's Personal Finance website

Why is being single so frustrating sometimes? Irina and Michelle explore both the emotional and practical side of single life. In addition to dealing with feelings of loneliness, single people--and frequently especially single women--face tasks that are difficult or even impossible to accomplish on one's own. Michelle talks about the lawn mower she physically couldn't start while single without her (male) neighbor's help, while Irina discusses the challenges of building furniture that requires two people. The Dating Professors analyze how to overcome some of these obstacles and how community members can best support each other with life's small and large complexities regardless of relationship status."Handy Women" Facebook group"Day to Day Tasks and Life Explained Step By Step And Advice" Facebook group"Dad, How Do I?" YouTube channel

Historically, dating has been deeply entwined with going out for a drink. But what happens if one of the two dating parties has opted for a life of sobriety? And what are the pros and cons of replacing substance use with romance, or what is the effect of infatuation on the brain? Irina and Michelle discuss with California-based social worker and addiction specialist Felicia Hermle how to handle recovery from substance use in the dating context, and how partners can show their support. Felicia talks science, introspection, and empathy on this important episode.Felicia Hermle's websiteFelicia's podcast "Sobriety Checkpoint"Sarah Michaud's book "Co-Crazy: One Psychologist's Recovery from Codependency and Addiction: A Memoir and Roadmap to Freedom"

While a cute pet picture can attract someone to your dating profile, pets can also be a major hindrance in romance. What happens when a significant other's pet prevents spontaneous travel or acts up jealously when someone comes over? What are reasonable expectations for how pet owners and non-owners should adapt to each other in relationships? Irina and Michelle--both long-time pet owners--break down the possible challenges that even a well-behaved Fido or Garfield might bring to the dating game!

Irina and Michelle sit down with sexual abuse and online harassment expert Prof. Mary Anne Franks from the George Washington University Law School to take stock of the state of Internet safety (or lack thereof) today. Mary Anne explains why "revenge porn" is generally a misnomer, why women are particularly at risk in a variety of online settings, and what has made it so difficult to pass federal legislation to protect individuals from having naked images of themselves distributed nonconsensually. The law professor and Krav Maga instructor also discusses what readers will find in her forthcoming second book "Fearless Speech," why only criminalization is likely to incentivize potential online abusers to stay put, and what encourages her to continue advocating for women's rights in the face of death threats. Join us for a conversation about both individual safety measures and the broader structural changes needed to prevent further victimization! Prof. Mary Anne Franks' faculty profileMary Anne's TwitterCyber Civil Rights Initiative websiteMary Anne's first book, "The Cult of the Constitution"

Comedian Allison (Alli) Goldberg is on a mission to make dating fun again. Once named one of the top 10 funniest women in NYC by Time Out NY, the now-Los Angeles based performer delights her public both on the stage and on the air. A friend of previous SOTI podcast guest Talia Lerner, Alli tells Irina and Michelle why dating provides such fertile material for her work from her matchmaking live comedy show "Love Isn't Blind" to her "How to Break up by Text" performances (the latter will soon be released as an audio show with celebrities reading the texts out loud and experts analyzing them!). Come hear how Alli's worst online date ever was with a fellow Yalie who was in the middle of convincing his former lover to have an abortion, why it's tricky to find the right male contestants for her matchmaking show, and what her philosophy is to overcome fears about any creative endeavor. Allison Goldberg's profileAlli’s IGAlli’s TikTok "Love Isn’t Blind" show"How to Break up by Text" showAlli's podcast "2 Girls, 1 Podcast"Related SOTI episodes:SOTI ep. 21: Second Marriage in the Second City with Prof. Talia Lerner and Phillip NightingaleSOTI ep. 18 & ep. 19: Exclusive Interview with Bestselling Author Nancy Jo Sales (Part 1 & Part 2)SOTI ep. 35: Evolving out of the Man Box with Dr. John Schinnerer

In the fourth part of this coverage of the sexual misconduct allegations against ex-George Mason University law professor and former FTC Commissioner Joshua Wright, Irina has a conversation with Dilan Esper, an experienced litigator in areas that include defamation law and the First Amendment. Dilan walks listeners through Josh's highly unusual defamation legal complaint against two of the women who accused Josh of misconduct, Elyse Dorsey and Angela Landry. Irina and Dilan focus on some of the most controversial parts of this legal document, and Dilan explains how Josh likely fails to meet the standard to get past a defendant motion to dismiss. Dilan also shows why things will probably get even worse for Josh if he does make it past such a motion, quite possibly resulting in more damaging materials and testimony appearing during the discovery process. Come find out why Dilan says that despite reading thousands of complaints in his career, Josh's complaint is unmatched in the extent to which it opens a window into a man's dark soul.SOTI ep. 39 with Prof. Christa LaserSOTI ep. 40 with Prof. Brandy WagstaffSOTI ep. 41 with Aliza ShatzmanDilan Esper's profileDilan's TwitterJoshua Wright's defamation lawsuit against Elyse Dorsey and Angela Landry (redacted by Christa Laser)Bloomberg coverageGlobal Competition Review article about GMU's reaction to the allegationsNote: According to a statement printed in the media by Lindsay McKasson, counsel to Joshua Wright at Binall Law Group "all allegations of sexual misconduct are false," "These false allegations are being made public after unsuccessfully demanding millions of dollars behind closed doors," and "We look forward to total vindication in court." According to a tweet by Prof. Christa Laser, "I don't appreciate that his attorney falsely suggests we are all lying (1/2 was in writing!) & want $ (this is a lie–I only want him gone)."

In the third part of this coverage of the sexual misconduct allegations against ex-George Mason University law professor and former FTC Commissioner Joshua Wright, Irina speaks with a victim of judicial harassment and retaliation, attorney and activist Aliza Shatzman who founded the Legal Accountability Project. After graduating from the Washington University School of Law in 2019, Aliza began clerking for a judge in the Superior Court of the District of Columbia. After subjecting her to harassment and sex discrimination, the judge fired her and then went on to derail her legal career by providing false statements during her final reference check for a prestigious position as a federal prosecutor in such a manner that she lost the position. Irina and Aliza discuss how little has changed in the twenty years between when Irina started law school--a time of shady "open secrets" at her own alma mater and in the judiciary--and today. They talk about the roots of the culture of silence and its reinforcement via tools such as defamation lawsuits, like potentially the one currently faced by two of Josh Wright's alleged victims, and what true change and principled allyship look like.SOTI ep. 39 with Prof. Christa LaserSOTI ep. 40 with Prof. Brandy WagstaffAliza Shatzman's profile Aliza Shatzman’s TwitterThe Legal Accountability Project (LAP) websiteDaily Mail article about the allegations against Joshua WrightGlobal Competition Review article about GMU's reaction to the allegationsNote: According to a statement printed in the media by Lindsay McKasson, counsel to Joshua Wright at Binall Law Group "all allegations of sexual misconduct are false," "These false allegations are being made public after unsuccessfully demanding millions of dollars behind closed doors," and "We look forward to total vindication in court." According to a tweet by Prof. Christa Laser, "I don't appreciate that his attorney falsely suggests we are all lying (1/2 was in writing!) & want $ (this is a lie–I only want him gone)."Joshua Wright's defamation lawsuit against Elyse Dorsey and Angela Landry (redacted by Christa Laser)