Parenting The Adlerian Way

With his signature humour and relatable storytelling, Dr Dan Dalton discusses the important concepts of winning a child’s cooperation rather than forcing their obedience. He reminds us of psychologists Alfred Adler’s and Rudolf Dreikurs’ major concerns for social equality in all human relations, including children. We also discuss how the counselling tool of asking parents to review a day in the life of the family as a way to discover dynamics at play. Dr Dalton also explains the 4 levels of discouragement and using parental emotions as the diagnostic clue to the purposiveness of the child’s behaviour.  You can find Adlerian counselling services at Dalton and Associates here. Other Adlerian organizations we mentioned were: NASAP ICASSI IAIPAdler Graduate School **********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

“Breaking the Boy Code” is Dr Katie Hurley’s latest book, following the success of the award-winning “No More Mean Girls”.  In this episode, Katie discusses how boys are socialized into a narrow description of manhood that is detrimental to their well-being. While that issue is not new – the “man-o-sphere” has created a world of social influencers who insidiously influence our young sons pushing them down a funnel of increasingly more severe beliefs about what it is to be a man including wealth, physique, dehumanizing women for sex / ra*pe. Katie has studied this system and explains how this online system is akin to brainwashing people into a religious cult. We discuss what a parent can do to help prevent and respond to this concerning situation. Buy Katie’s book “Breaking The Boy Code” here. Follow Katie on IG: @drkatiehurleylcswDr Hurley’s website can be found here. **********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Q1. Teen daughter home from uni assumes she can just take my car anytime.  Q2. 4 year old daughter is stealing and lying.  Q3. When should you start allowance?  **********Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Check out more free parenting advice on my blog at www.alysonschafer.com Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive a free “Home Responsibilities by Age” checklist.

Margot Denomme is my guest on this episode, and she brings her 26 years of experience as a Crown Attorney where she saw first-hand how low self-esteem and social media can harm children, leading to mental health issues, bullying and legal troubles.  She discusses the importance of parents’ taking collective action to bring about the changes needed to protect our vulnerable children. She has founded an organization called “Raising Awareness About Digital Dangers” (RAADD) which offers a host of resources for youth and their parents, including her book “The Smart Phone Guide”. Check out her book and all the resources at RAADD: https://raadd.ca/You can find Margot Demonne’s RAADD movement of “Control The Scroll” on IG at @RAADDMovement And Margot herself on LinkedIn**********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Do you worry about your child’s weight and wonder if you are doing the right thing in how you encourage them to eat better and exercise more? Turns out sometimes so-called helpful prompts are not helpful. In fact, they could make matters worse. But what is a parent to do? Watch will their kiddo eats a bag of chips while gaming the day away? I had the privilege of discussing the book, “Your Child Is Not Their Weight: Parenting in a Size-Obsessed World”, with the authors, Dr Joey Skelton and Dara Garner-Edwards. Their research at the Brenner FIT Program, and their approach in the book, recommends that we don’t focus on weight, but rather we need to emphasize a strong family connection, tackling lifestyle choices together as a family, and utilizing planning and structure with involvement from the children. Listen in to learn more! Check out more resources at Dr Skelton’s website www.BrennerChildrens.org/BrennerFIT You can find Dr Skelton on social media here: X: @DrJoeySkelton Bluesky: @drjoeyskelton.bsky.social Instagram: @brenner_fit Facebook: Brenner FITAnd purchase the book here:  Your Child Is Not Their Weight – Parenting in a Size Obsessed World**********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Dr Will Dobud’s book, “Kids These Days”, shines the light on how the emphasis on youth mental health has paradoxically resulted in more pathologizing, more labelling, more medication and more institutionalizing of young people – all while rates of youth mental health skyrocket.  Something is not right. He argues that our systems don’t support human flourishing and in fact create harm in youth. Dr Will is an advocate for co-adventure therapy and other forms of building egalitarian and respectful relationships with youth that allow them to be the hero of their journey and to face and overcome the hurdles of life through micro-adventuring. The book:www.kidsthesedaysbook.comHis website: www.willdobud.comFollow Will Dobud on social media: FB: https://www.facebook.com/WillDobudPhD Instagram: @WillDobud Instagram: @Kids_These_Days_BookLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/will-dobud-5209ab74X: @WillDobud**********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Q1. How hard can I push my kiddo to go back to camp?Q2. 17yr old wants to spend most of her savings on a bday gift for her new boyfriend Q3. 3yr old doesn’t play with other kids at daycare. Is he lonely?Q4. How to start family meetings with a 3 and a 4yr old? (You can find my Family Meeting Playlist on YouTube Here.Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Check out more free parenting advice on my blog at www.alysonschafer.com Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive a free “Home Responsibilities by Age” checklist.

Sophia Galano has been providing therapy to teens and their families since 2015. In this episode, we discussed her book “Calming Teenage Anxiety: A Parent’s Guide to Helping Your Teenager Cope with Worry”. Sophia helps unpack the Gen Z anxiety effect, and how parents can find the messy middle between supporting but not enabling their anxious teen. Sophia is a big believer in helping youth develop skills and abilities to manage their emotions and to discover and challenge their thinking traps. Check out the podcast to get more of her useful tools. You can find Sophia on social media here: https://www.instagram.com/sophiavale_galano/And purchase her book here:  Calming Teenage Anxiety: A Parent's Guide to Helping Your Teenager Cope with Worry." **********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

We assume when our teens start dating, they are going to pick good partners and be in good relationships, but wow – sometimes that is not the case! In this eye-opening conversation with the leading research experts from the University of Calgary who have developed an education texting-based tool for parents, we talk about the definition of relationship violence, the role of parents as a protective factor and how their text-based app solved the hurdle of parents not feeling adequately prepared to have these conversations about healthy vs unhealthy relationships. You can find them here: Instagram: @connected_parents_canadaLinkedIn: ConnectED Parents Website: https://preventdomesticviolence.ca/our-work/children-youth-parents/connected-parents-project/**********Thank you to FeedSpot for selecting “Parenting the Adlerian Way” as the #1 parenting podcast in Canada two years in a row!Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer (anonymously) on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.