Parenting The Adlerian Way

It’s not every day that you get to interview the former editor of the New York Times parenting section! I have been following KJ Dell’Antonia since she managed Motherlode and it was great meeting her finally, and discussing her book, “How To Be a Happier Parent”. KJ generously provided some of the research and practical wisdom that every parent can benefit from if they want to be happier while they do the inevitable hard work of parenting. If you’d like to read one of KJ’s books, here are the links! How to Be a Happier Parent: https://tinyurl.com/HappierParentBookAmazonThe Chicken Sisters: https://tinyurl.com/ChickenSistersAmazon Playing the Witch Card: https://tinyurl.com/WitchCardAmazonIn Her Boots: https://tinyurl.com/InHerBootsAmazonSubstack #AmReading: https://kjda.substack.com/KJ’s website https://kjdellantonia.com/Instagram: @kjda https://www.instagram.com/kjda/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kjdellantoniaThe #AmWriting Podcast: https://itun.es/i67F2zJ or http://amwritingpodcast.comDo you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

I met Nick Moon in Nepal on a recent service / trekking trip in support of the NGO “Empowering Nepali Girls”. Over our time together I learned about Nick’s childhood diagnosis of autism and how the education system failed him, how a special teacher finally understood him, and a mother who was also a counsellor advocated for him. He was a marine, a tradesman and now a counsellor in practice sharing his wisdom with clients. A gem of a person who shared his experience about living life with neurodiversity. An enlightening conversation!You can get a copy of Nick Moon’s mother’s book “Tough and Cheerful: The Life And Times Of Kancha Sherpa, Last Living Member From The First Ascent Of Mount Everest” by Patricia Moon here.  Learn more about the organization, Empowering Nepali Girls.Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Q1. 12yr old girl who has become super-quiet. What to do?Q2. My teen doesn’t want to join any clubs, do I force him? Q3. My son says he is trying to find a job, but not really. Do I cut off his allowance?Q4. My kids leave their stuff laying around and I nag but they never pick it up.Looking for more Adlerian wisdom? Check out The Daily Adler NewsletterIf you have a question you’d like answered on a future podcast, email it to hello@alysonschafer.com Check out more free parenting advice on my blog at www.alysonschafer.com Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive a free “Home Responsibilities by Age” checklist. 

In this episode, I talk with James Rilling, psychologist and author of “Father Nature: The Science of Paternal Potential”. Did you know that only five percent of mammals care for their young? Yup, and humans are one of the species that do! James explains the science behind testosterone, oxytocin and changes that occur for fathers. Plus, the importance of father caregiving and provisioning and the hidden benefits of rough play to teach emotional regulation and more! A fascinating conversation.You can get a copy of James Rilling’s book here. Do you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Rocky Garrison is one of our Adlerian greats. In this interview Rocky talks about the Individual Psychology model of human development including the development of a fictional final goal and how we develop beliefs about self, others, and the world to sustain this goal and the movement toward it. In this model of development, Rocky shares that the courage to meet the challenges of life constructively is developed primarily within the family constellation. If you have questions for Rocky, he can be reached at rockygarrison@gmail.comDo you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Q1. Teen boy is shutting down outside interests and turning to tech but won’t open up about it.Q2. 13yr old daughter won’t wear her orthodontic elastics and teeth are shifting now. Q3. Ways for 3 and 5 year olds to find their sense of power in pro-social ways (instead of power over others). Do you have a parenting question for me? Email them to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com to receive my “Home Responsibilities By Age” checklist! And, check out the “Events” tab for my upcoming webinars!

Sarah Allen Benton has been a parent in recovery from alcoholism for more than 20 years. She is a counselling psychologist who specializes in addiction and recognizes how parents and their children can quietly but significantly be impacted by alcoholism. We discuss her “field guide to recovery” for parents that is based on a growth-focused lifestyle change, including emotional sobriety across the life span. Check out Sarah Benton’s book: Understanding The High-Functioning Alcoholic Have a look at her website too.You can read Sarah’s column “The High Functioning Alcoholic” for Psychology Today here. On social media you can follow Sarah on these platforms: Sarah’s FB PageSarah’s FB Community: Parents in Recovery Support Group LinkedInDo you have a parenting question for me? Send it to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com and receive my “Responsibilities By Age” pdf.

Q1. Teen boy makes the same unreasonable requests and then storms about, rude and angry. Q2. How to establish authority and connection when you are the less dominant parent in a traditional family where the dominant father works, and the less dominant mother stays home and does all the child care. Q3. How can I help my 10 and 13 year old boys get along peacefully? Q4. How to support a teen daughter who is getting excluded from her friends’ parties and sleepovers?Do you have a parenting question for me? Email them to hello@alysonschafer.com and I’ll answer on an upcoming Q&A podcast.Sign up for my monthly newsletter at www.alysonschafer.com to receive my “Home Responsibilities By Age” checklist! And, check out the “Events” tab for my upcoming webinars!