Chris Voss - How to negotiate like your life depends on it
Hey everyone - the Inside Influence team and I are taking an eight week sabbatical this winter (or summer if you’re in the Northern Hemisphere) to generally reset, recalibrate and refill our creative tanks.
For many of us, myself included, that means traveling across the world to see family members where it’s been far too long between hugs.
To keep you fueled while we’re gone, we’ve traveled back through the archives and pulled out four of our favorite Inside Influence episodes of all time. I can also hand on heart say that each of these has, in some way, radically changed how I show up, lead and influence.
If you're new to the Inside Influence crew, enjoy the ride. If you’re a long time listener, these are definitely conversations worth listening to twice.
Stay safe and we’ll see you back with a brand new season in August.
What if I told you that as well as caffeine, chocolate, and your iPhone, you also had a yes addiction? My next guest, Chris Voss was the FBI's lead kidnapping negotiator. And what that means is he had to understand influence at a level and with stakes that you and I can barely imagine. For his 24 year tenure in the FBI, he was trained in the art of negotiation at Scotland Yard, at Harvard Law School. He's also the recipient of the Attorney General's Award for Excellence in Law Enforcement and has taught business negotiation at a number of prestigious universities around the world.
He's the founder and CEO of the Black Swan Group. And he's also the author of Never Split the Difference, which is a book that I genuinely cannot recommend highly enough if negotiating, persuading, or influencing is a part of your daily life, which I can promise you, it is. In our conversation, we jumped into a number of really fascinating conversations. The first of which was how yes is actually the last thing we want to hear, which blew my mind because I had assumed that negotiation was all about getting to a yes. And apparently, not one single hostage negotiation technique is designed to get a yes. What are they designed for? You'll have to listen.
- High stakes conversations: How to prepare your mental state when going into these conversations where literally lives are on the line?
- Delivering bad news: how to do it quickly and efficiently and get straight into what's next.
- How to kick off a negotiation and how to close it.
This conversation, I think, is by far one of my favorite ones in the podcast so far. Chris has so many years of experience in international crises and high-stakes conversations. And it really showed me again that all the theories and the ideas and the models in the world count for nothing until you have been down on the ground in a high stakes situation and you've really had to put them to the test. I invite you to sit back, listen, take a fascinating peek behind the curtain of what has to have been one of the most interesting careers I've ever heard of. And as a result, take some tools, and in the words of Chris, start negotiating like your life depends on it.
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