Grief is a Sneaky Bitch

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Bearing The Wait

Season 2

About This Episode



In Bearing The Wait, my guest Christina Bain and I sat down together (physically distanced of course), to hold this beautifully intimate and special conversation about the grief that comes about when you face your own mortality. Christina was so honest and vulnerable as she opened up about the journey she’s been on over the past 5 years. She is 36, married to Wes, her husband of 12 years, and she has an 8-year-old girl named Marlowe. She also has Stage 4 Colon Cancer. She is wise and kind, she offers insights and humor, and she expands our understanding of grief. She is such a gift in my life and I’m so grateful to have this chance to introduce her to you too. As mentioned in the show, you can read What to Make When You're Dying, the beautifully insightful article she published earlier this year. You can also follow her cancer journey on Christina’s blog at Bearing the Wait


About The Host



As founder of Reimagining Grief, Lisa Keefauver is on a mission to change the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time. Learn more by visiting www.reimagininggrief.com In addition to hosting this podcast, Lisa offers 1:1 Grief Support, Guided Mindfulness Meditations, Grief-Smart Workplace Consulting, and a unique line of Empathy Cards. She works as a freelance speaker and writer on the topics of grief, loss and empathy for many outlets including as a VIP contributor to Thrive Global. If you’re feeling social, follow her journey on social media @reimagininggrief. If you like this series, please make sure to leave a rating and write a review TODAY on Apple Podcasts.


More Episodes

9/30/2021

Self-Compassion and Grief

Season 3
About the episodeWelcome to Season 3 of Grief is a Sneaky Bitch! In Self-Compassion and Grief, host Lisa Keefauver sat down with world-renowned self-compassion researcher, Dr. Kristin Neff. She is author of the bestselling book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself, and recently released her new book Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive.Jump straight into:(00:47) - Kristin’s earliest memory of grief: A different kind of loss (05:43) - The ability of uncertainty and the power of self-compassion(11:25) - How to transform your connection with emotions (20:47) - Shock and the physical impact of self-compassion(26:21) - Self-compassion as an antidote to shame and guilt (31:40) - Caretaker burnout: What is empathetic distress and how to manage it -(36:48) - What is rumination and how can we cut it out? (42:17) - Self-compassion self vs. self-pity: How to be kind but motivatedEpisode Resourcesself-compassion.org Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself Fierce Self-Compassion: Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and ThriveEpisode SponsorSpecial thanks to our episode sponsor, Recalibrate, providing workplace mental wellness that empowers mental & emotional learning. Visit www.recalibratemind.com to learn more.About The showHost Lisa Keefauver, the founder of Reimagining Grief, holds an extensive grief resume herself, as a social worker, narrative therapist, grief guide, and widow. From CEOs and social workers to authors, educators, filmmakers, and stay-at-home moms, her guests open up about the complexity, confusion, and even confidence they have gained by navigating a grief journey of their own. Learn more visit www.reimagininggrief.com and Follow @reimagininggriefIf you love the show, please head to Apple Podcast to leave a rating and write a review!
6/22/2021

Ask Me Anything

Season 2
About the episode:You asked and I answered! In this final episode of Season 2, I invited the Reimagining Grief community and listeners of the podcast to ask me anything about grief and loss. I am so incredibly moved by the flood ofDMs, comments, and emails I received from so many of you.I take seriously the vulnerability it took you to ask the questions and I did my best to answer many of them and hope in doing so, I will be helping other grievers just like you. I covered 1. Finding a grief counselor, 2. Dating in widowhood (after loss in general), 3. Feeling angry and betrayed, 4. Complicated grief, 5. Grief brain (brain fog), 6. Returning to work, 7. Grieving a friend, 8. Ambiguous loss, 9. Secondary Losses, and 10. Handling the innocent questions.Episode Resources:If you want to learn more about Individual Grief Support with host Lisa Keefauver, MSW visit www.reimagininggrief.com/support. If you want to join the GSB Fan Club and be a part of 2 LIVE Q&A Zoom sessions with her and other listeners from around the world, visit www.reimagininggrief.com/gsbfanclub.Jump straight into:5:49 - How to find a good grief counselor or therapist. “ it's about style. And so part of what I invite you to do is to think a little bit about what you need. What are your expectations? Have you been in traditional therapy before? What was helpful and what wasn't do you like someone who gives you practical advice and homework, or do you just need to be seen and heard.”8:36 Dating in Widhood (or after loss in general) - “And the truth is. It's a journey just like dating is frankly, any time in our lives. Take it slow and take it easy.”13:46 Anger and Betrayal in Grief - “So take a moment to maybe hold your anger again with that same compassion, that same loving kindness and just soften to it. And maybe just listen, what is it trying to tell you?”22:34 Complicated Grief - “If the intensity of your grief remains high. And with real honest reflection, you don't see any improvement as the months go by. And I mean, up and down, it doesn't have to be linear totally in an upward direction. But with honest reflection, if you see no improvement as the months go by and months and months and you're not sure how else to cope.”25:27 Grief Brain - Grief brain is totally normal. I'm not sure I've met a single griever who hasn't experienced it. So what is grief brain? Well, some people call it a fog and I think that's a pretty apt description because of what happens”.30:02 Returning to Work After Loss - “When is it okay to return to work? Should I have returned full-time or part-time if I have a choice, what are my options and how will I know what the right thing is?”38:46 Grieving a Friend - “Particularly when it comes to grief, the reminder is that we can't control other people's beliefs or expectations. All we can do is listen and word and be kind and compassionate to ourselves.”40:55 Ambiguous Loss- “It's actually quite common and yes, it can feel complicated because it invites us to hold more than one thing to be true. And so this is definitely an area of loss where I encourage you to find a support system in your life.”43:54 Secondary Loss -“Secondary losses, not unlike ambiguous loss, are the unsuspecting and surprising, and in some ways hurtful losses...sometimes there are practical things like then we lose our job or maybe our home...oftentimes we lose friendships because our friends don't know how to show up for us in our pain.”46:45 Responding to the Innocent Questions -”Those punch in the gut questions. You know, the questions I'm talking about, the questions, iIf you've lost a child, “do you have any children or how many children do you have?””Thanks for listening! If you’re feeling social, don’t forget to follow Lisa on Instagram. Make sure to leave a rating and write a review today on Apple Podcasts so that more people can find us.Our host, Lisa Keefauver, offers a variety of services and products from individual grief sessions, to guided meditations, workshops, company culture consulting and even a line of beautiful and authentic Empathy Cards. To know more visit www.reimagininggrief.comAbout the show:If you love deep, honest, authentic conversations get ready to love Grief is a Sneaky Bitch. Lisa Keefauver, founder of Reimagining Grief, holds an extensive grief resume herself, as a social worker, narrative therapist, grief guide, and widow. She brings her deep curiosity, love of conversation, and knowledge of how language and culture shapes our experiences of ourselves and our world, including our grief, to each unscripted conversation. From CEO’s and social workers to authors, educators, filmmakers and stay-at-home moms, her guests open up about the complexity, confusion, and even confidence they have gained by navigating a grief journey of their own.
5/11/2021

A Mother's Gift of Joy

Season 2
If you love deep, honest, authentic conversations get ready to love Grief is a Sneaky Bitch. Lisa Keefauver, founder of Reimagining Grief, holds an extensive grief resume herself, as a social worker, narrative therapist, grief guide, and widow. She brings her deep curiosity, love of conversation, and knowledge of how language and culture shapes our experiences of ourselves and our world, including our grief, to each unscripted conversation. From CEO’s and social workers to authors, educators, filmmakers and stay-at-home moms, her guests open up about the complexity, confusion, and even confidence they have gained by navigating a grief journey of their own.About the episodeFor this episode, I was joined in conversation by the lovely Lindsay Joy Taylor, the owner of The Joyful Jewelry Box, jewelry and keepsakes to honor and remember your loved ones. Lindsay’s grief story begins early on, her mother was murdered when she was only one and even if she doesn’t have explicit memories of her, the grief and trauma it left on her family made an impression on her throughout her life. Like me, Lindsay is now an advocate for thinking about grief from a different angle than we were taught. She believes it is absolutely possible to feel joy and hold space for your mourning at the same time. In fact, that is one of the messages she hopes to put out in the world through her jewelry line and the grief work she does. Can’t wait for you to meet her!Episode ResourcesIf you wanna know more about Lindsay’s work, follow her on The Joyful Jewelry Box Instagram. Also, check out Lindsey’s beautiful products on The Joyful Jewelry Box website.Jump straight into:03:22 - Lindsay’s first memory of grief - “I'm a motherless daughter, but more specifically, my mother was murdered when I was only one year old. So naturally, I don't have any explicit memories of her.”11:17 - Holding space for grief doing the best we can - “We need to engage with and tend to our grief because if not, we're going to pass it onto somebody else.”20:06 - Getting stuck on grief: Is closure a real thing? - “We never caught her killer. There was a forced resignation in terms of how you pick up life and move forward.”22:45 - Helping kids understand and tell their loss story - “It was still really helpful for me to feel seen and to feel acknowledged, to be given attention, regardless of whether or not the context was my mother.”27:20 - Telling your story to people: Should I disclose or not? - “It created this outlet where people think that they have a right to help you figure out your own damn story.”33:02 - Therapy for therapists: Can I do this? Lindsay’s path in the psychology world - “I felt burdened by the experience. I didn't feel like I was equipping them with skills and so it just became overwhelming.”45:21 - How The Joyful Jewelry Box was created - “I took a hard left and then decided, instead of just designing jewelry on a whim, now I was doing remembrance and memorial jewelry to help other grievers honor and remember their loved ones.”Thanks for listening! If you’re feeling social, don’t forget to follow Lisa on Instagram. Make sure to leave a rating and write a review today on Apple Podcasts so that more people can find us.Our host, Lisa Keefauver, MSW offers a variety of services and products from individual grief sessions, to guided meditations, workshops, company culture consulting and even a line of beautiful and authentic Empathy Cards. To know more visit www.reimagininggrief.com