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Grief is a Sneaky Bitch

with creator and host, Lisa Keefauver, MSW


Latest episode

  • Mary-Frances O'Connor | Tending to Our Grieving Body

    01:12:58||Season 6
    Mary-Frances O’Connor is one of the foremost experts on the impact of grief on the brain and the body. That’s why host Lisa Keefauver was thrilled to welcome her back to the podcast for a second time to discuss her latest book The Grieving Body: How the Stress of Loss Can Be an Opportunity for Healing. Just as Mary-Frances did in her book, she combines fascinating science, intimate storytelling, and her generous heart to help us better understand the physiological impact of the stressors of grief. Some of the themes explored include: Stress is a significant factor in the grieving process.Grief can significantly impact physical health, particularly cardiovascular health.Every small act of agency contributes to healing.The body has a natural resilience and ability to recover from grief.Life after loss involves adapting to new realities and understanding changes. Grieving is a continuous learning curve that requires practice.Attachment plays a crucial role in how we experience grief.Social connections can alleviate some of the physiological impacts of grief. MORE ABOUT GUESTMARY-FRANCES O’CONNOR, PhD is a professor of psychology at the University of Arizona, where she directs the Grief, Loss and Social Stress (GLASS) Lab, investigating the effects of grief on the brain and the body. Her first book The Grieving Brain was included on Oprah’s list of Best Books to Comfort a Grieving Friend. O’Connor holds a PhD in clinical psychology from the University of Arizona and completed a post-doctoral fellowship in psychoneuroimmunology at the UCLA Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior. Having grown up in Montana, she now lives in Tucson, Arizona. Visit www.maryfrancesoconnor.org to learn more. ABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time. Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com.Follow @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram.Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less hereSubscribe AFGO with Lisa Keefauver on Substack here

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  • Serene Meshel-Dillman

    48:44||Season 6
    Welcome Serene Meshel-Dillman to the show. In this episode, host Lisa Keefauver engages in a profound conversation with Serene - a producer and filmmaker, about her documentary series 'Take Me Out Feet First.' now playing on Amazon Prime. – is a poignant documentary series delving into the deeply personal journeys of 25 terminally ill individuals as they navigate their end-of-life decisions and explore their options. They explore personal experiences of loss, the cultural context of grief, and the importance of discussing medical aid in dying. The conversation highlights the need for agency and dignity in end-of-life choices, emphasizing the significance of sharing stories to normalize these discussions and advocate for change in legislation surrounding medical aid in dying.MORE ABOUT GUESTA New York native and dancer with a passion for the visual arts, Serene attended The School of American Ballet, Tenafly High School then The University of Vermont. Post graduation, she opted out of law school and worked at an advertising agency in New York, founded a company that imported baskets from Haiti, then moved to Los Angeles to work in production on television commercials. In 2014 Serene conceived and directed the documentary film, “Getting to The Nutcracker”, a behind the scenes look at what it takes to produce the classic ballet from auditions to final performance. Her second documentary, “The 5th Dementia” is about a Los Angeles-based band whose members live with Alzheimer’s, dementia and Parkinson’s. They are able to sing and play music despite their neurodegenerative diseases. Take Me Out Feet First, currently streaming on Amazon Prime, is her first series.Key TakeawaysThe importance of agency in end-of-life decisions.Many people do not use medical aid in dying despite having the option.Personal stories can drive advocacy for change.Conversations about death should be normalized.Quality of life is paramount in end-of-life care.Legislation is evolving, and advocacy is crucial.ABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time.LEARN more at www.lisakeefauver.com.FOLLOW @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram.LISTEN to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.READ Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook.WATCH her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less hereSUBSCRIBE AFGO with Lisa Keefauver on Substack here
  • Consolee Nishimwe & Barbara Becker | Pain, Resilience, & Hope

    01:40:27||Season 6
    Consolée Nishimwe and Barbara Becker joined host Lisa Keefauver for this powerful episode. In this episode, these friends explore the profound themes of grief, trauma, and resilience. They discuss Consolée's experiences as a survivor of the Rwandan genocide, and the importance of empathy and storytelling in the healing process. The conversation highlights the significance of creating safe spaces for vulnerability and the role of community support in navigating pain and hope. Consolee opens up about her journey of healing through storytelling, the transformation of her identity after trauma, and the importance of breaking the stigma surrounding HIV and rape. She emphasizes the role of mindfulness and meditation in her healing process, and the necessity of community support in overcoming shame and stigma. As Consolee expressed, we are more than what we endured.  MORE ABOUT GUESTSConsolee Nishimwe is an author, a motivational speaker, and a survivor of the 1994 genocide against the Tutsi in Rwanda. Today, Consolee is a committed speaker on the genocide, a defender of Women’s rights, and an advocate for other genocide survivors. In 2012, Consolee released her memoir Tested to the Limit: A Genocide Survivor’s Story of Pain, Resilience, and Hope. Consolee currently lives in New York. Learn more about her at www. https://www.consolee.org  Barbara Becker is a bestselling writer, international human rights advocate, and interfaith leader. She is the author of the Gold Nautilus Award-winning HEARTWOOD: The Art of Living with the End in Mind, which Katie Couric Media featured in their “Books that will Change Your Life.” Barbara has worked with the United Nations, Human Rights First, the Ms. Foundation for Women, and has recently participated in a delegation of interfaith leaders to Rwanda. As an ordained interfaith minister, she bridges the sacred and the secular. Learn more at www.barbarabecker.comABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time. Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com. Follow @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram. Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook. Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less here Subscribe to AFGO with Lisa Keefauver on Substack here
  • Sundari Malcolm | Grief Gems

    01:12:13||Season 6
    Sundari Malcolm, a Birth, Grief, and Death Doula, joined host Lisa Keefauver for this episode. In 2007, at 27 years old, and after 7 years of being her Caregiver, Sundari Malcolm lost her mother to Breast Cancer. 4 years later, her father died from the complications of Brain Cancer.Those experiences redirected her life, and she's made it her mission to equip people with the tools they need to manage life’s greatest transitions. This conversation travels topics deep and wide from friendship loss, the role of caregiving for one parent, to grieving a complicated relationship with the other parent and the practices and skills we need to metabolize our grief. All along the way Sundari brings warmth, wisdom, and my favorite – a little cheeky humor to this wide-ranging conversation. MORE ABOUT GUEST:Sundari is the founder of A Healing Doula Academy, a self- paced virtual training program for Spiritually led Grief & Death Doulas with a focus on Indigenous healing practices. Sundari is offering this community an enrollment discount of 20%. You can visit www.ahealingdoula.com to learn more and Simply apply the giftcode, SNEAKYBITCH20 at checkout.  CHAPTERS:05:07 Cultural Perspectives on Grief07:58 Understanding Friend Loss14:54 Healing Practices and Self-Care19:31 Navigating Life as an Orphan28:03 Spiritual Practices in Grief29:11 The Role of Caregiver in Grief29:32 Navigating the Complexities of Caregiving43:38 The Challenges of Anticipatory Grief56:10 Understanding Complicated Grief01:03:55 Reclaiming Intuitive Healing ABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time. Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com.Follow @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram.Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook.Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less hereSubscribe AFGO with Lisa Keefauver on Substack here 
  • Cole Imperi | Non-Clinical Approach to Grieving

    01:08:58||Season 6
    Cole Imperi, a clinically trained chaplain and thanatologist joins host Lisa Keefauver to explore the multifaceted nature of grief. They explore the importance of grief literacy, the role of community support, and the cultural perspectives that shape our understanding of loss. Cole shares her experiences working with incarcerated individuals and discusses the concept of shadow losses, emphasizing the need for compassion and understanding in grief. The conversation highlights the significance of rituals, vulnerability, and the importance of building supportive communities for those navigating grief.  MORE ABOUT GUESTCole Imperi is a thanatologist, author, and researcher whose work focuses on the use of non-clinical tools in support of those experiencing loss and grief. She is the author of "A Guide to Grief" published by Kids Can Press for ages 10-14 and has a second book about grief for adults coming in 2026 from Penguin. Visit www.coleimperi.com to learn more about her work. KEY TAKEAWAYS09:49 Grief in the Prison System18:09 Themes of Loss and Home24:42 Cultural Perceptions of Grief33:05 Vulnerability of Grievers38:53 Cultural Influences on Grieving Practices49:11 Building Community in New Environments55:09 Writing for Grief Literacy in Teens01:04:18 Understanding Thanatology and Its Cultural Context ABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time.Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com.Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook.Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less hereSubscribe AFGO with Lisa Keefauver on Substack hereFollow @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram.
  • Olivia Abousaid | Finding Agency in Grief

    01:16:41||Season 6
    Olivia Abousaid joins host Lisa Keefauver for a profound conversation about the complexities of grief, particularly in the context of community, chronic illness, and cultural influences. They explore personal experiences of grief, the importance of rituals, the role of anger, and the necessity of finding agency amidst ongoing loss. The discussion emphasizes the significance of community support, the power of letter writing as a tool for processing grief, and the balance between experiencing joy and sorrow. Ultimately, the episode serves as a reminder that grief is a shared human experience that requires connection, understanding, and compassion. Our conversation traverses a wide landscape of types of losses and facets of grief  - from the death of loved ones, witnessing and experiencing racism and genocide, dreams deferred and denied, and the grief over the limitations brought on by living with Lupus, a chronic illness. MORE ABOUT GUESTMaster Certified Coach Olivia understands the profound power of self-improvement and resilience. Born and raised in Dallas to Palestinian parents, her journey has instilled in her a deep appreciation for personal growth and navigating cultural nuances. Now residing in Los Angeles, Olivia combines her life experiences with her expertise as a Master Certified Professional Coach to empower individuals to unlock their full potential. As a dedicated grief and transformation coach, Olivia helps clients navigate their unique journeys through grief—whether it’s the loss of a loved one, coping with chronic illness, or grappling with unfulfilled dreams. Her transformational coaching goes beyond one-size-fits-all solutions, creating a safe space for you to explore your goals, overcome challenges, and embrace your authentic self. Learn more about Olivia by visiting https://www.pact-coaching.com/ Key Moments09:46 Cultural Context of Grief15:36 Navigating Complicated Grief21:12 Agency in Ongoing Grief30:36 Embracing the Complexity of Emotions36:32 Sustaining Activism and Personal Well-being45:19 Understanding Chronic Illness and Grief56:59 The Importance of Community in Grief01:05:39 Rituals and Practices for Healing ABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, and grief activist on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time.Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com.Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook.Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less hereSubscribe to Substack AFGO with Lisa Keefauver
  • Anne Gudger | The Fifth Chamber

    01:07:19||Season 6
    Anne Gudger is the author of the beautiful memoir, The Fifth Chamber, which Kirkus Review called “An emotionally riveting memoir, raw and inspiring.” In this conversation, Annie Gudger shares her journey of navigating love and grief after the accidental death of her husband when she was just 6 months pregnant with their son. As she shared in her extraordinary memoir, Anne explores the complexities of entering a new relationship as a young widow and mother while dealing with profound. Together we explore themes around shock, the nature of helpful (and not helpful) grief support, along with the coping mechanisms she developed. Annie emphasizes the importance of curiosity and meaningful conversations in processing grief and highlights the therapeutic value of writing as a tool for healing.  MORE ABOUT GUEST Anne Gudger's work has been published in places like Newsweek, Real Simple Magazine, Columbia Journal, The Los Angeles Review, and more. She has been a Best of the Net Nominee twice and has won a handful of essay contests. In March 2020, with her beloved daughter, she co-founded Coffee and Grief: a community that includes a monthly reading series focused on grief and their podcast called Coffee, Grief, and Gratitude. Anne’s big purpose is to normalize grief, to give grief a microphone. You can learn more about Anne Gudger, her incredible memoir, The Fifth Champer, and her other grief platforms by visiting www.annegudger.com or follow her on socials at @annegudger.  Key Moments00:00 Introduction to Grief and Early Loss06:00 Lessons from Early Grief Experiences09:01 Celebrating Kent: A Life Full of Adventure11:58 Navigating Accidental Loss and Early Grief15:07 The Role of Support Systems in Grief18:01 Specific Ways to Offer Support21:04 The Impact of Grief on Daily Life28:55 The Importance of Grief Support30:01 Navigating the Before and After of Grief34:25 The Challenge of Dating After Loss41:53 Remaking Identity Through Grief44:47 Finding New Love Amidst GriefABOUT THE SHOW & HOSTLisa Keefauver is a social worker, widow, cancer survivor, and grief activist, author, and keynote speaker on a mission to reimagine the narratives of grief, one conversation at a time. Learn more at www.lisakeefauver.com.Follow @lisakeefauvermsw on Instagram.Listen to Grief is a Sneaky Bitch Podcast - Available on all podcast platforms.Read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch: An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss. Available in bookstores and on your favorite online booksellers, including Bookshop.Org. Also available as an audiobook.Watch her TEDx talk, Why Knowing More About Grief Can Make it Suck Less here