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Baby Loss, Mum Guilt, and Parenting Three Boys - Anna Daly

Season 10, Ep. 6

TV presenter and entrepreneur Anna Daly chats to host Aisling Keenan about the trauma of baby loss, how she and her husband parent their three boys, and taking time out from the daily grind. Anna talks about wanting to be more present when with her children, how she suffered devastating pregnancy losses before having her first child, and how no one ever asks men how they spin all the plates!

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  • 11. "I'm a cool mom" – Kelly Fitzsimons on being friends with her teenage daughter while also being her parent

    54:00
    Can you believe we've reached the end of the season! My last guest for season 13 is the very lovely Kelly Fitzsimons – formerly known on Instagram at least as MissEllaMayandMommy. Kelly had her daughter Ella aged 19 and her following online grew as the two of them grew up together. Sharing outfit posts with matching dresses, their mother daughter relationship was (and is!) goals. Kelly went on to have her son Mac in her early thirties, leaving a 13 year age gap between her two children. We talked this week about that age gap, what she knows now that she wishes she knew as a teenage mam, what has changed in the intervening years, and how threats sometimes *are* the best way to get children to do what you need them to do. Kelly also talks about the beautiful relationship her 14 year old has with her one year old, and how while one is worried about boys and periods, the other is teething. It sounds like delightful chaos! Kelly is so laid back about parenting and it's a very refreshing listen for that reason. Enjoy, and I'm delighted to say I'll be back next season for more amazing episodes.
  • 10. "I'm still a mother, no matter what" - Dominique Nugent's heartbreaking story of late-stage miscarriage.

    01:01:50
    I was so so grateful to this week's guest for joining me on the podcast. The lovely Dominique Nugent so bravely chatted to me about her experience, earlier this year, of late stage miscarriage. Dominique was a day short of 16 weeks when she delivered her baby, who had not survived in utero. She so generously decided now was the time to talk about it, start to finish, with me and with the listeners to the podcast, saying that she knows if listening will help just one person through their own tough time, she'll be happy she did it. If miscarriage is in any way a sensitive subject for you currently, maybe hold off on listening to what is an incredibly emotional episode – both of us cried a lot – but if you think it could help in your healing process, I know Dominique's courage was inspiring to me and could be to you too. I'll be back soon with another episode.
  • 9. Finding the balance as a single parent, with Liadán Hynes

    53:36
    My guest this week is my lovely friend, author, and journalist Liadán Hynes, who is a wealth of knowledge when it comes to parenting, and life in general really. She's a single parent to one daughter who's 9 years old. She's self-employed and works flexibly to be as present as she can for her little girl and writes often about her experiences as a working single mother. We talk about everything from facing what could be lonely weekends without your child or children, the imbalance that exists for mothers in the workplace and so much more. Lia's got so much of her own experience to draw from, but as an empathetic and resonant writer, she has so much wisdom to share from years of interviewing. A truly lovely chat, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. *Note the cards mentioned by Liadán about the mental load mothers carry are called the Fair Play Game, created by Eve Rodsky.
  • 8. Your Questions Answered - Carla Kelly chats pregnancy, postpartum and parenthood

    47:38
    My guest this week is Carla Kelly, who is one of the founders of Ask The Midwife, a company that aims to support parents from pregnancy through to postpartum and beyond. A midwife herself, we asked you guys, our cherished listeners, to put questions to her that you might need advice on. We talked about an incredible grandparents refresher course that they run (totally genius if you ask me) their various antenatal and postnatal classes, how they help build a community of mothers so no matter what you're going through you feel less alone, and there's a little bit of chat about the various colours of baby poop. We cover all bases here on everymum! Anyway – enjoy my chat with Carla and I'll speak to you next week.Note: If you have a specific medical query, it's recommended to speak to your GP.
  • 7. Assessment anxiety: When to seek help, with Caroline Foran

    54:39
    My wonderful friend Caroline Foran is my guest this week, and a returning guest to Everymum the podcast. This time, we talk about her most recent struggles with her son Caelan, and how she has recently undergone assessments with various clinical assessors to help better understand her son's unique needs. We talk about the anxiety over a potential future diagnosis, how guilt can be associated with wanting a straightforward life for your child, and how she cries every night at bed time out of sheer frustration at how challenging her days have become. She talks with such bravery and candour, but also with empathy and a genuine sense of gratitude. This chat might be of particular help to anyone starting or in the middle of an assessment process, or anyone who feels the frustrations and guilt associated with parenting. I hope you enjoy!
  • 6. Putting it out there: Shannen Joyce on single motherhood, illness and moving forward

    53:06
    My guest this week is Shannen Bulman Joyce, who was previously known on social media as Big C and Me, because she used her platform to document her cancer journey. Over the course of her adult life, just the past ten years, she's been diagnosed with and survived cancer three times. She's now the healthiest she's ever been, and is thriving and living life as a single mother to her daughter Roisin. We chat about everything from health anxiety and mam guilt, to what it was like having to explain to her daughter that she and her daughter's dad were no longer together. We also talked about the difficulties around being a parent and being sick, even with a more minor illness, and the guilt that comes with that. I'm thrilled I finally got to chat to Shannen as I'd followed her for a long time, and she's one of the most genuinely inspirational people you could come across. Enjoy and I'll chat to you next week.
  • 5. Double miracle: Rosanna Davison's rollercoaster parenting journey

    54:36
    My guest today is model and mam of three, Rosanna Davison. Over the past few years, life has changed dramatically for Rosanna. From going through a tragic 14 miscarriages and believing she wouldn't be able to carry a pregnancy to term, she and her husband sought the help of a surrogate from Ukraine to make their dream of having a family come true. She talks to me about the anxiety of knowing her baby was in someone else's body in a completely different country, and how she coped with that. And then we talk about the shock of her finding out shortly after her daughter was born that she had spontaneously conceived healthy identical twin boys. It was great to hear Rosanna's honest take on life with three under five, how she manages everything and how her identical twins have interesting differences (particularly when it comes to sleeping arrangements!) but it was an emotional episode too, and I had tears in my eyes many times throughout – I hope you enjoy lovely Rosanna's story.
  • 4. When motherhood just doesn't go as planned, with Kelly Donegan

    01:11:32
    Kelly Donegan is my guest this week – you might know Kelly, if you're a millennial like me, from Tallafornia, a reality show she starred in 12 years ago now. If you've been following her online, you'll have seen her go from reality TV star to fitness expert to now, a mammy of one. Since her daughter Cherry arrived, Kelly's plans for motherhood haven't quite gone off as she'd hoped. We talk about the disappointment you can feel when your birth plans go the exact opposite to what you'd hoped, the challenges so many people go through when it comes to breast feeding, and what Kelly would do differently if she could go through it all again. It's such an open, honest and brave conversation, which I think is refreshing, given the tendency online to only show the 'good' and cover up the tougher times. I hope you enjoy it.
  • 3. Revisiting life with triplet boys, four years on with Ali Deasy

    56:50
    My guest this week is Ali Deasy, who is famous where she lives as the mother who is shadowed everywhere she goes by her gorgeous triplets, Bruce Ted and Lenny. Ali has been a guest on Everymum in the past, but I saw recently she spoke online about her mental health struggle when the boys were between the ages of 2 and 3 years old. I caught up with her as soon as I heard that, because often I think postnatal depression or motherhood-related depression might only be associated with the immediate aftermath of having a baby, or as something that you can be certain you've escaped if your child is older than one – that's absolutely not the case, and I chatted to Ali about how she leaned on her friends to help her through that tough patch. We also chat about the logistics of managing three four year old's (and her angel of a daughter, Georgia, who is like another mammy to the three lads), and how she only dresses them the same if she needs to be able to do a quick headcount in public. I've never smiled so much during an episode, honestly, so I hope it's the same for you. Enjoy!