CALLING HOME with Whitney Goodman, LMFT

Whitney answers two listener questions about family relationships that don't go full no-contact but are also deeply dysfunctional. She also discusses a viral Chinese app called "Are You Dead?"Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.1:12 The viral "Are You Dead?" app from China06:24 Listener question #114:42 Listener question #2

Whitney has taken estranged parents' bait for the last time, and it's time to set the record straight.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.

Whitney answers two listener questions about harm that happened during a crisis and harm that accumulated over years. One listener is navigating repeated boundary violations from in-laws during her husband's medical emergency while postpartum—and her husband doesn't remember any of it. The other was cut off by parents who refused therapy, yet they tell everyone she initiated no contact.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.

Parental rejection hurts more than almost any other kind of rejection, and it’s a pain that doesn't dissolve with age. If you've ever minimized what happened by saying "they just weren't that affectionate" or wondered why you can't just get over it, this episode reveals the research-backed truth about how early rejection embeds itself into your nervous system, personality, and every relationship you have as an adult.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.

Whitney responds to a Facebook post from parents who feel blindsided by their college-age child who suddenly asks for no contact. She breaks down how the wrong response from parents can push the relationship toward permanent estrangement.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.

If you've ever felt like the relationship you have with your parents or with your adult child looks completely different from the one that your parents had with their parents, you’re not imagining it. Whitney explores why relationships between generations have fundamentally changed over the last 30 years and why they're probably not going back.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.

Whitney reviews anonymous letters written by estranged parents to their adult children. She identifies patterns of spiritual bypassing disguised as kindness, conditional accountability, minimization of harm, defensive anger masked as concern, and comparison used as manipulation. This isn't about shaming anyone; it's about naming what's happening beneath the surface so you can better understand your own experience with estrangement.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complexfamily dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.coJoin the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic PositivityLearn more about ad choices. Visit podcast.choices.com/adchoicesThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.00:00 Introduction: Reviewing real letters from estranged parents02:01 Letter 113:20 Letter 219:40 Letter 325:56 Letter 435:21 Conclusion

Whitney defines what authoritarian parenting actually is (beyond just being strict), explores how it's rooted in control rather than raising independent humans, and explains why these parents struggle when their children develop agency and can no longer be controlled the same way. If you have an inkling that your family of origin might have been drawing on some of the principles of authoritarian parenting this might be a useful listen. Whitney also answers a listener's question about coming to terms about accepting an uninvolved parent.Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles.Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to ⁠whitney@callinghome.co⁠⁠Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club⁠⁠⁠Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhitFollow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft⁠⁠⁠Order Whitney’s book, Toxic Positivity⁠Learn more about ad choices. Visit podcast.choices.com/adchoicesThis podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.02:00 What authoritarian parenting actually is (and isn't)07:20 When you can’t be controlled anymore12:45 How authoritarian parents respond to loss of control24:43 Listener question