Behind The Smile with Ash Butterss

In this inspiring episode, Ash sits down with TEDx speaker and award-winning author Melo Calarco—a man who has quite literally cycled to the edges of the world in search of meaning, resilience, and himself. Over 30,000 kilometres across five continents, Melo has learned that the most transformative journey is always the one within.He shares how meditation and mindfulness became the quiet anchors behind his extraordinary adventures, and how facing grief, uncertainty, and physical limits on the road ultimately deepened his understanding of what it means to truly live. Together, Ash and Melo explore the tension between ambition and contentment, and what it looks like to pursue big goals without losing yourself in the chase.Drawing on Eastern philosophies and real-life transformations he has witnessed through his coaching work, Melo offers grounded, practical tools for bringing more presence, flexibility, and fun into everyday life. The conversation is a reminder that growth doesn't always look like pushing harder—sometimes it looks like slowing down, checking in with your values, and choosing joy as a practice. Melo's story is equal parts adventure and wisdom, and a powerful invitation to live more fully, freely, and in alignment with what matters most.Episode chapters:00:00 Introduction to Melo Carlaco01:41 A Day in the Life of Melo05:54 The Importance of Fun and Play06:55 Hiding Behind a Smile: Personal Stories10:02 Navigating Grief and Adversity13:04 The Journey of a Lifetime: Cycling Around the Globe17:47 The Seeds of Meditation20:25 Cultivating the Pause: Reaction vs. Response24:31 Life After Adventure: What Now?27:37 The Aftermath of Achievements: TEDx Experience29:26 Setting Hard Goals for Personal Growth32:06 The Balance of Flexibility and Discipline34:08 Integrating Eastern Philosophies into Coaching39:48 Real-Life Transformations through Mindfulness44:01 The Importance of Presence in Daily Life46:40 Practical Tools for Mindfulness and Presence50:45 Living by Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeConnect with Melo below:BOOK: BEATING BURNOUT FINDING BALANCE FREE CHAPTERMELO's TEDx TALKFREE MEDITATIONS on INSIGHT TIMER STAY CONNECTED on MELO's LINKED INFollow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comJoin Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

This week you’re invited to listen in as Ash sits down with her lifelong friend Edwina, to explore what it means to remake your life in the wake of loss, motherhood, and big internal change. Edwina opens up about the sudden death of her brother, how grief reshaped her sense of self, and the quiet, courageous decision to question her relationship with alcohol.She shares what happened when she chose an alcohol-free life, not just on the surface, but in her identity, her friendships, and the way she shows up as a mother and a woman. Ash and Edwina dive into the role of therapy on this path, unpacking powerful modalities like EMDR, and how these practices helped her meet the younger parts of herself with compassion instead of criticism.Together, they talk about the fears that come with sobriety and the unexpected gifts that arrive when the noise of drinking is stripped away. The conversation shines a light on how retreats, community, and intentional healing practices can open space for self-discovery, deeper connection, and true emotional safety.Episode Chapters:​​00:00 Introduction to Retreats and Self-Discovery01:35 Meet Edwina: A Journey Through Life03:34 Navigating Grief and Vulnerability06:44 The Impact of Injury on Identity09:11 Finding Purpose in Adversity11:01 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Photo Story21:17 The Unfairness of Life and Loss23:00 Alcohol: A Coping Mechanism35:13 Healing and Understanding Family Dynamics35:48 Therapeutic Journeys: Exploring EMDR and Internal Family Systems38:02 The Alcohol-Free Awakening: A Personal Journey42:09 Facing Fears: The Terrifying Decision to Quit Drinking46:14 Redefining Relationships: Alcohol and Authentic Connections50:21 Building Deeper Friendships: The Shift in Social Dynamics55:12 The Power of Vulnerability: Authenticity in Relationships01:01:05 Embracing Change: The Journey of Self-Discovery01:07:52 Investing in Self: The Importance of Personal Retreats01:12:30 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling Life: Community, Nourishment, and MovementFollow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comUpcoming Workshops:Join Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

In another deeply honest solo episode, Ash reflects on the six biggest mistakes she’s made across six years of sobriety and how each one became a turning point for growth, self-trust, and real transformation. She takes you back to the day her life changed, then walks you through the lessons that followed, from expecting others to change, to trying to squeeze her new self into her old life, to giving her power away to people who didn’t have the best intentions. She opens up about people pleasing, outgrowing relationships, chasing what’s next instead of appreciating what’s now, and the humbling realisation that healing has no finish line. These are the truths she learned the long way, the kind that only come through lived experience, deep reflection, and choosing honesty over comfort.If you’re navigating change, questioning your path, or learning how to stand in your truth even when it costs you, this episode will feel like a conversation you didn’t know you needed.Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comUpcoming Workshops:Join Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Reset and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

In this powerful and deeply honest conversation, Ash is joined by her mentor and high performance advisor, Mark “Dobbo” Dobson, for a thought-provoking exploration of what it truly takes to grow, evolve, and rise after life challenges you. Together they dive beneath surface level success and unpack the real work behind clarity, purpose, and personal expansion.Dobbo shares hard-earned wisdom on defining your values, sharpening your vision, and having the courage to live in full alignment with who you really are. They also explore how adversity can become a catalyst for transformation, and why the relationships we choose play a pivotal role in shaping the person we become.This conversation is a powerful reminder that meaningful growth is not built on perfection, it is built on honesty, resilience, and the willingness to turn life’s hardest moments into the foundation for something greater.You can connect with Dobbo through his website www.dobbo.com.au. Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comJoin Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

In this episode, Ash is joined again by her dad, Rod, for a candid conversation about the real complexities of love and relationships. They unpack topics many people experience but rarely talk about openly, including love addiction, love avoidance, codependency, and what healthy communication actually looks like in practice.Drawing on both personal experience and honest reflection, they explore how family dynamics shape the way we love, the patterns we repeat without realising, and what it takes to change them. Ash also opens up about a deeply personal crossroads, her uncertainty around motherhood, and the inner questions that come with choosing a path that feels true rather than expected.Their father daughter conversations are always listener favourites, and this is exactly why they continue to shine a light on the honest, nuanced conversations that many people are thinking about, but few feel safe enough to say out loud.

In this episode, Ash has a raw conversation with husband, father, and sober human Vim Verma as they discuss addiction, identity, and what happens when you finally stop running from yourself. Vim opens up about growing up in a mixed-race culture where drinking was normalised, emotions were rarely spoken about, and asking for help felt almost impossible.Together, they unpack the quiet pressures of family expectations, the heavy emotional charge of the holiday season, and the stigma that keeps so many people suffering in silence. There are moments of grief, moments of clarity, and Vim’s classic humour, that remind us how human this journey really is.Vim also shares how his recovery program, meditation, and spiritual practice became a turning point, helping him strip back the noise and reconnect with who he is beneath the coping mechanisms. This is a conversation about breaking cycles, choosing courage over comfort, and discovering that real healing starts on the inside.If you’ve ever questioned your relationship with alcohol, felt trapped by expectations, or wondered what life could look like if you truly listened to yourself, this episode will land.Episode Chapters:00:00 Introduction to Retreats and Self-Discovery01:34 Vim Verma's Journey to Sobriety03:45 Navigating Sobriety During the Holidays04:54 Cultural Influences on Drinking07:24 The Impact of Family Dynamics07:53 Getting to Know Vim: Daily Life and Fun14:06 Hiding Behind a Smile: The Photo Story16:20 The Progression of Alcoholism19:05 Consequences of Drinking: Crashing and Bashing28:18 The Turning Point: Seeking Help31:44 Experiences in Early Recovery38:47 Finding Hope in Recovery41:54 Life After Sobriety: Changes and Growth47:50 Navigating Life's Challenges in Recovery51:23 The Role of Support in Recovery59:46 Non-Negotiables for a Happy LifeYou can connect with Vim through his Instagram here. Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comUpcoming Workshops:A Return To You | One Day Retreat Sunday 22nd February, 2026Tickets available here. Join Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

In this special episode, Ash is joined by her longtime friend Ash Murray. For years, both women battled addiction silently, only sharing the full depths of their stories with one another after coming into recovery. Today, Ash Murray is the Eating Disorder Lead and Therapist at The Wave Clinic in Malaysia, with her expertise grounded not just in study, but in lived experience.Ash opens up about her personal journey through eating disorders and alcohol addiction, sharing what recovery has truly looked like beyond the surface. From the isolating depths of illness which nearly took her life, to the slow rebuilding of trust, self-worth, and connection, she reflects on the pivotal role that rehab, honesty, healing and self-care have played in finding lasting freedom.Together, they explore the intersection of therapy and lived experience, how vulnerability and empathy can become powerful tools for healing both self and others. They unpack the mental health challenges that intensified during the COVID-19 pandemic, and the importance of ongoing support in maintaining balance and wellbeing.Episode chapter:00:00 Introduction to Ashley Murray's Journey02:57 Life in Malaysia and Work at the Wave Clinic05:46 Navigating COVID-19 in Treatment08:21 The Impact of COVID-19 on Mental Health11:08 A Photo that Represents Struggles13:55 The Super Yacht Experience and Its Consequences16:27 The Turning Point: Seeking Help19:22 Life in Bali and the Struggle with Addiction22:16 The Rock Bottom Moment24:49 Desperation and the Path to Recovery27:08 The Turning Point: Reaching Out for Help31:53 Childhood Struggles: The Roots of Eating Disorders44:03 Escaping Reality: The Need to Hide48:25 Facing the Truth: A Journey of Self-Discovery54:28 The Struggle of Surrendering Control57:02 The Complexity of Eating Disorders59:13 The Power of Intervention01:00:41 Transformation Through Therapy01:04:11 Building Trust in Recovery01:06:15 The Importance of Honesty01:08:57 Setting Boundaries for Recovery01:13:03 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeConnect with Ash through:https://thewaveclinic.com/https://www.instagram.com/thewaveclinic/Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssTikTok @behindthesmilewithashbWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comUpcoming Workshops:A Return To You | One Day Retreat Sunday 22nd February, 2026Tickets available here. Join Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!

In this episode, Ash sits down with husband, father, and business owner James Date to explore what life looks like after addiction—and how recovery has reshaped the way he moves through the world.James shares how community, service, and genuine connection became the anchors of his sobriety, transforming what once felt like isolation into a life rich with meaning and purpose. He speaks openly about the power of vulnerability, the role of daily routines and prayer in keeping him grounded, and how embracing honesty has deepened his relationships at home and beyond.Together, Ash and James confront the lingering stigma around addiction and discuss the strength it takes to ask for help. Through moments of reflection and gratitude, James reveals the quiet joy found in showing up authentically each day—a reminder that recovery isn’t just about living without substances, but about rediscovering who you are underneath it all.Episode Chapters:00:00 Introduction to James Date and His Journey02:54 The Importance of Connection and Community in Recovery05:52 Daily Routines and Spiritual Practices08:58 The Role of Surrender in Recovery11:58 Compassion and Kindness in Daily Life15:01 Finding Joy in Service and Helping Others17:57 The Impact of Sponsorship in Recovery21:03 The Struggles of Identifying as an Addict24:03 Behind the Smile: A Photo Reflection26:53 The Journey to Acknowledging Addiction30:08 Understanding the Roots of Addiction32:54 The Ongoing Journey of Recovery36:18 Understanding Alcoholism and Addiction38:30 Rock Bottom Moments42:14 Finding the Right Rehab49:34 The Journey of Outpatient Recovery51:23 The Importance of Vulnerability56:54 Reconnecting with Self and Family01:02:25 Non-Negotiables for a Fulfilling LifeConnect with James below:Instagram: @slayingsoberPodcast: Slaying Sober - listen on Spotify Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterssWebsite⁠ www.ashbutterss.comUpcoming Workshops:A Return To You | One Day Retreat Sunday 22nd February, 2026Tickets available here. Join Ash on retreat in 2026!The Embodied Woman Retreat | Gold Coast | May 2026 Rest and Renew Holistic Retreat in Bali | August 2026Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here!