We Need To Talk… with Dr. Darcy Sterling

The early stage of a new relationship is like nothing else. The excitement, the intense physical attraction, the space they take up in your mind — it can be all consuming. A new relationship is a high you can’t find in a drug.  Because of that, new partners can struggle to pace themselves — to slow their roll — so they don’t burn through those early months. Which is why pacing a new relationship can become its own thing. And because she is in a new relationship, my co-host Ashtyn Tardif, who you’ve grown to love, joins me with all the questions! In this episode, you’ll learn:How to handle pressure from family and friends to meet your new partner. The pros and cons of making things official on social media.How to balance your personal life and independence with merging into a couple.AND… what to do when the first “I Love You” doesn’t happen simultaneously.  Xxoo DarcyCREDITS“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith.  DISCLAIMER#Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice#RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #LoveLanguage #RelationshipIssues #RelationshipHelp #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy#RelationshipGoals #SlowAndSteady #NewRelationship #NewRelationships #PaceYourself #PacingInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube. 

Painful sex? Torturous periods?PMS that makes you feel like you should be wrapped in yellow caution tape?This episode is PACKED with answers to your HORMONE questions, and all the other “lady-problems” that women are shamed into silence about. In this conversation with TikTok sensation Dr. Karen Tang, you’ll learn:  If birth control causes long-term hormonal imbalances.How much period pain is too much pain.Whether hormone replacement therapy is really dangerous.AND… Dr. Tang debunks some of the biggest myths on TikTok about hormones.Regardless of which hormone issues you’re experiencing, it’s not hysteria and there is a solution. Xxoo DarcyREFERENCES“So Last Week I’m At The Gynecologist’s Office” It's Not Hysteria: Everything You Need to Know About Your Reproductive Health (but Were Never Told) By: Karen Tang MDCREDITSWe Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling is a Sterling Standard Production. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani and Preston Smith.DISCLAIMER#Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts#RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #LoveLanguage #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy#CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #HormoneBalance #HormoneImbalance#HormoneImbalancing #HormoneImbalances #HormoneHealth #HormoneReplacementTherapy #HormoneTherapy #WomensHealth#WomensHealthcare #WomensHealthMatters #PCOSAwareness #MenopauseSupport #MenopauseHealth #MenopauseRelief #MenopauseSymptoms #Perimenopause #ReproductiveHealth #Endometriosis #BirthControl #PMDD #DrKarenTangInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling X:@DrDarcySterling YouTube:@DarcySterling Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube.

One of the hottest topics in mental health is attachment theory, which is a psychological framework that posits that the way we bond to our primary caregivers creates a template for how we’ll move through relationships as adults. It goes like this: We learn how to love and how to get our needs met through the care we received from our primary caregivers. The extent to which they fulfilled our needs informs how we will then express our needs as adults and how we’ll respond to the needs of those closest to us, particularly, our partners.When it comes to living experts in the field of attachment theory, there is no one more respected than today’s guest. Dr. Diane Poole Heller is an international expert and pioneer in attachment theory. She is the author of The Power of Attachment: How to Create Deep and Lasting Relationships — a book that I make most of my clients read at some point during our work. Dr. Heller is the Creator of DARe: a training and certification program for therapists that teaches them how to apply attachment theory into their clinical work, and she joins me to shed light on how we can all move towards developing a secure attachment style, regardless of the attachment style we emerged from childhood with. In this episode, you’ll learn:The 4 different attachment styles and how each develops in childhood.How our attachment style influences the way we behave in our adult relationships. Practical tools for healing attachment wounds and moving towards a secure attachment style. How partners with different attachment styles can reduce conflict and misunderstandings.Xxoo DarcyREFERENCEShttps://traumasolutions.com/https://dianepooleheller.com/The Power of Attachment: How to Create Deep and Lasting Relationships Diane Poole Heller, PHD The Verdict Is In By: Alan Sroufe and Daniel SiegelCREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.  DISCLAIMER#Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice#RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #LoveLanguage #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #DianePooleHeller #AttachmentStyles #AttachmentStyle #AttachmentTheory #SecureAttachment #AnxiousAttachment #AvoidantAttachment #Attachment #AttachmentParenting #AttachmentIssues #AttachmentTherapyInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube

We all know someone who manages to avoid fully committing to a relationship, either because we’ve dated them, or someone we love has. They may say they’re committed to you — they may even identify as being in a relationship — but there are things they Do or Don’t Do that leave you feeling like you’re standing on a house of cards: You don’t feel fully integrated into each other’s lives. They avoid making plans for the future. You feel like you’re chasing. Because you are. Their behavior is consistent enough for you to catch feelings, but too inconsistent to make you feel secure. In this episode we drill down on: What creates people who can’t fully lean into a committed relationship.What creates the people who are drawn to them.  How to heal both partners.I know you know someone who has felt this way.Send them some love by sharing this.Xxoo DarcyREFERENCESHow We Feel App-Apple StoreHow We Feel App-Google Play StoreAttachment QuizThe Power of Attachment BookDarcy’s email: darcy@askdrdarcy.com for Attachment Style Quiz interpretation (be sure you’ve registered on the linked site for this b/c Darcy will need to reference the original results). #Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast#RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships#LoveLanguage #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling#CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #AvoidantAttachment#AnxiousAttachment #CommitmentIssues #RelationshipIssues #RelationshipHelp CREDITS“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling, and Preston Smith.  DISCLAIMERInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube.

It’s one of the most common questions people have about mental health: How do I know if I need therapy?How do you know if your problems are “normal” or if it’s time to call in a pro?In this episode, we answer questions like:What’s the difference between a sad day and a red flag for therapy?How do I know if I’m leaning too much on my friends? Is medication without therapy a real thing? And if so, is it effective?Can a physical illness mean that you need therapy? What types of therapy work the best?AND… I share with you the most IMPORTANT questions any therapist should be able to answer for you at the start of therapy.Xxoo DarcyREFERENCESAverage Cost of Getting a Master’s Degree in Social WorkDivorce StatsCREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.  DISCLAIMER*correction* Darcy states that she’s been on medications half her life, since she was 26 years old. Math is not her thing. She’s 54, bringing her total number of years on medication to just under half her life. #Therapy #TherapyWorks #TherapySessions #TherapyIsCool #DBTTherapy #DBTSkills #EmdrTherapy #Emdr#DialecticalBehaviorTherapy #Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals#DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts#RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #LoveLanguage #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy#Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcyInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube.

A couple of months ago, I interviewed New York Times bestselling author, Molly Roden Winter. Her book, “More: A Memoir of Open Marriage” documents her journey as a Brooklyn Mom who ventures into the world of polyamory, as she opens her marriage. My interview with her sparked such a buzz from listeners — more than any other episode of WNTT. It’s linked below if you haven’t listened.  I just re-read her book while I was on a vacation and I have to tell you, about every 50 pages I found myself taken aback by how well her husband Stewart navigated their experience. He was repeatedly in situations where there were five wrong ways of responding to things, and in my opinion, he consistently landed on the right one. Was he lucky? Or has he actually been taught relationship skills? Those were the answers I wanted, so I invited him to join me.Stewart Winter did not disappoint.CREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. Link to Molly’s book: More: A Memoir of Open MarriageLink to Molly’s episode DISCLAIMER#newyorktimesbestseller #more #mollyroden #mollyrodenwinter #polyamory#polyamorous #nonmonogamy #nonmonogamous #openrelationship #sex #newyorktimes #Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #LoveLanguage #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcyInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube. 

When you think about boundaries, what emotions come up for you? Since you listen to this podcast, you probably think that the idea of boundaries is appropriate — that people should have the right to set them. But that doesn’t mean you find it easy to set boundaries. Humans, particularly women, are raised to be likable. And for a lot of people, “likable” and “boundaries” are oxymorons. I teach people how to set boundaries every week. But when it comes to setting them in my personal life, I squirm. Everywhere I look I hit a blind spot. Lucky for both of us, today’s guest is a powerhouse when it comes to understanding and teaching boundaries. Nedra Glover Tawwab is a licensed clinical social worker, and author of the New York Times bestseller “Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself.”In this episode, you’ll learn:Nedra’s definition of boundaries.The boundary people cross most often.Why women who set boundaries can be confused with being demanding, difficult, or a diva.AND… Nedra gives me some tips to use myself!Xxoo DarcyREFERENCESSet Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming YourselfThe Boundaries Flip Chart: A Psychoeducational Tool to Help Clients Set Healthy Limits, Develop Fulfilling Relationships, and Reclaim Their WorthDrama Free: A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family RelationshipsThe Set Boundaries Workbook: Practical Exercises for Understanding Your Needs and Setting Healthy LimitsConsider This: Reflections for Finding PeaceCREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.  DISCLAIMER#Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #boundaries #SetBoundaries#SettingBoundaries #PersonalBoundaries #HealthyBoundaries #BoundariesAreHealthy #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #NedraGloverTawwab #NedraTawwabInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube.

I spent the first 15 years of my career working with teenagers, studying child and adolescent development. And what I can tell you is that throughout history, adults have consistently seen new technologies as potential threats, and we’ve been particularly concerned about the harm those technologies can have on children. It’s part of the reason why I’ve been slow to join the hand wringing around social media. Which doesn’t mean I’m dismissing the concerns. I’m clear that social media has played a role in triggering certain mental health issues. But a few weeks ago, the American Surgeon General proposed that social media platforms be required to publish a general warning about the danger to mental health, in much the same way we label alcohol and tobacco products with warnings. And it made me wonder if the adults in the room are once again viewing normal adolescent behaviors and misattributing the causes to the newest, loudest technology of the moment. Is this a real thing? Or the latest moral panic? In this episode, you’ll learn:What the surgeon general proposes for social media warnings.If the rise in mental health issues is truly related to the rise of social media.Whether any good can come from social media.Xxoo DarcyCREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.  DISCLAIMER#MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #Neuroscience #YouthMentalHealth #MentalHealthStigma #DigitalWellBeing #TeenMentalHealth #DigitalDetox #PositiveMentalHealth #MentalHealthTips #Dating #DatingTips #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcyInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube. 

Marriage, today, is a very long partnership. Half a century or more, if you do it in your 20’s and you’re lucky enough to live out the average lifespan in the USA: 77. When I think about the length of that intended commitment, I wonder how reasonable it is that we expect anyone to make it. I’m going to use a very unromantic analogy here: Making a long-term commitment can be a little like a teacher who gets tenure. You just don’t try as hard. Because you don’t have to. You’ve got job security.There’s no meaningful annual review because you know they can’t fire you. And with marriage, the emphasis is on honoring the commitment. Not on how each of you shows up.Over the years, I have often thought that we’d be better quality partners if our commitments were shorter. Time-limited. If, instead of promising forever, we made micro-commitments. If we had marriages. 3 years. 5 years. Pick your interval. That way there’s an incentive to keep working at it. To keep trying.Because both partners know that there’s a date by when they’ll meet to reevaluate how happy they are. How compatible they still are. In this episode, you’ll learn:What a micro-marriage is and how it differs from a traditional marriage.The psychological benefits of a micro-marriage.How to suggest a micro-marriage to your partner if you’re so inclined.AND… for the critics who would judge me for proposing micro-marriages, I explain the ways in which micro-marriages already exist in society today. So there. 😉Xxoo DarcyREFERENCEShttps://www.tandfonline.com/doi/epdf/10.1080/13229400.2021.1952889?needAccess=truehttps://ri.urd.ac.ir/article_113827.html https://drive.google.com/file/d/1-Kdsb-2fR6iIWr8zrw3L6mdVPw9GvDCA/viewhttps://heinonline.org/HOL/LandingPage?handle=hein.journals/jlfst10&div=21&id=&page=https://stacks.cdc.gov/view/cdc/11207Link to VIA Survey Character Strengths hereCREDITSThis episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.  DISCLAIMER#LoveAndMarriage #MicroMarriages #ModernMarriage #MicroWedding#MarriageAdvice #MarriagePodcast #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipAdvice#RealTalkRelationships #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #DrDarcySterling #DrDarcyInstagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   YouTube:@DarcySterling   Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube.