Unburdened

On this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we are joined by Laurie Wevers, a licensed marriage and family therapist and spiritual director who specializes in treating religious trauma and assisting individuals in connecting with their spirituality post trauma. Based out of the Washington DC area, Laurie has a deep personal connection to the work she does, rooted in her own experiences of growing up in a fundamentalist Christian community and navigating the complexities of embracing her queer identity within that context.However, her experiences in the church led her to question the institutional approach to spirituality and seek a path that prioritized genuine connection and inclusion. This ultimately propelled her toward spiritual direction, a transformative process that she now advocates for, especially for those seeking a non-religious path to spirituality. Throughout the episode, Laurie provides insight into the complexity of navigating religious trauma and finding solace on a non-religious spiritual path. Her story is a testament to the idea that it is possible to find peace, authenticity, and a sense of belonging outside the structure of organized religion. We discussed: Laurie’s experience of growing up in a fundamentalist Christian community and the challenges she faced in reconciling her queer identity with her spiritual beliefs.The practice of spiritual direction, where Laurie uses rituals, intuitive listening and heart centered questions to help individuals reconnect with their true selves after leaving structured faith systems.Fear and isolation one may feel when stepping away from a religious belief system. Concept of freefall and the courage it takes to trust in oneself or the universe during this transition.Laurie’s personal struggle with coming out later in life and the subsequent estrangement from family.Importance of boundaries, the value of a chosen family, and the transformative power of hope and love in embracing one’s true self.How language can be triggering for those healing from spiritual trauma and the importance of creating supportive spaces that allow for healing without re-traumatization.Learn more about Laurie Wevers:https://laurie-wevers.clientsecure.me/ Learn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Our conversation with psychologist and former evangelical Dr. Renea LynnOn this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we meet Dr. Renea Lynn, a psychotherapist based in the Bay Area since 2008. Specializing in ADHD and religious trauma recovery, she offers a unique perspective on mental health care, addressing depression, anxiety, and trauma. Dr. Lynn specializes in relational and religious trauma therapy for children and adolescents. Raised in the Assemblies of God Church, her path changed when she pursued a bachelor's in church leadership with the goal of becoming a pastor. Dr. Lynn bravely shares her 20-year-long journey, detailing the collapse of her beliefs within the Assemblies of God Church, and how therapy played a critical role in her path to recovery and the redefinition of her spirituality.Her story is a powerful reminder that, although the journey of healing from spiritual trauma is fraught with challenges, it is also an opportunity for profound growth and self-discovery. Through heartfelt discussion, Dr. Lynn charts the path of reformation that accompanies the deconstruction of faith, highlighting the essential nature of empathy, self-compassion, and the courage to trust oneself.  We discussed: The role of therapy in supporting individuals as they deconstruct their faith and rebuild their spiritual existence.Finding new forms of community and spirituality is part of the healing process.Recognizing and allowing oneself to express a range of emotions, including anger, is vital for healing.Developing self-trust and self-compassion is essential for navigating the journey beyond religious trauma.Acknowledging and validating personal truths through documentation and creative expression.Setting healthy boundaries is a crucial step in the process of recovery and self-discovery.Learn more about Dr. Renea Lynn:https://www.drrenealynn.com/Learn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Jennifer Bartley and talks about her transformative journey from Southern Baptist upbringing to healing after a profound shift in beliefs and complete deconversion.On this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we have Jennifer Bartley, a therapist from Nashville, Tennessee, who shared her profound journey through spiritual trauma and her subsequent healing process. Jennifer, originally deeply rooted in the Southern Baptist community, experienced a significant shift in her beliefs which led to a complete deconversion.Jennifer detailed her experiences at Southern Baptist Seminary, her intense involvement in church activities from a young age, and the eventual questioning that led to her faith crisis. She discussed the complexities of handling this transition while being a mother and a wife, emphasizing the difficulties and the strategies she employed to rebuild her sense of community and personal belief system outside of the church.Jennifer’s story is not just one of loss and struggle but also of empowerment and recovery. She uses her experiences and now specializes in helping individuals navigate religious trauma and spiritual deconstruction.We discussed: Shifting parenting approaches post-faith deconstruction, prioritizing open dialogue, belief freedom, and offering alternative life lessons for children.Jennifer’s strategies for creating new family traditions and discussing important life topics without religious influence.Intentionally seeking out and investing in supportive relationships post-faith transition.The complexities of faith changes, and finding ways to live authentically and meaningfully post-deconstruction.To learn more about Jennifer Bartley:Website: https://www.daybreaktherapyservices.com/ Learn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Our conversation with Brian McDonald about his book "The Long Surrender: A Memoir about Losing My Religion"On this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we have Brian McDonald. From his upbringing in Alabama to his 30-year career as a preacher, missionary, and pastor, including seven transformative years in Taiwan mastering Mandarin Chinese. With degrees from Liberty University and the College of William and Mary, Brian transitioned into counseling, teaching at prestigious universities like Johns Hopkins and George Mason.Brian discussed the complexities of leaving a rigid religious community, the isolation that often follows, and the struggle to maintain relationships with those who cannot accept his change in belief. His memoir, The Long Surrender, encapsulates his journey of grappling with theological conflicts, particularly the doctrine of eternal damnation, which he could never fully reconcile with his understanding of a just and loving deity.Married to Kathy for 44 years, they have three children and three grandchildren. His life's work, both as a minister and now as a therapist, continues to inspire and support those in the midst of their own spiritual transformations.We discussed: Difficulties faced when leaving a religious community, including losing support and love from former members.Staying true to one's beliefs and integrity, even if it means diverging from a religious community's beliefs.The mental health journey of dealing with intrusive thoughts and obsessive-compulsive disorder.Encounters with racial segregation and inclusion, exploring how cultural and racial backgrounds shape belief systems.Finding a supportive community that respects individual beliefs and values.Maintaining relationships with individuals who may not understand or agree with one's changing beliefs.To learn more about Brian McDonald: Website: https://www.brianrushmcdonald.com/index.htmTHE LONG SURRENDER: A Memoir About Losing My Religion (book): https://www.brianrushmcdonald.com/Twitter: https://twitter.com/drbrianmcLearn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Our conversation with Wendy Montgomery on her efforts to make the LDS church safe for LGBTQ people and her eventual decision to leave.On this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we sat down with Wendy Montgomery, a certified life coach and Enneagram educator. As a mother of five children, four of whom identify as LGBTQIA+, Wendy co-founded Mama Dragons and has served on the board of directors for both Mama Dragons and Affirmation, the largest international Mormon LGBTQIA+ organization.After her son's coming out, Wendy's faith is tested as she confronts the Mormon Church's doctrines that clash with her unconditional love for her children. She grapples with emotional struggles, engages in activism with groups like Mama Dragons and Affirmation, and considers the broader impact of church policies on LGBTQ+ individuals. The courage to question, the strength to protect, and the love that knows no bounds— Wendy's advocacy and allyship is a profound lesson in parental love and the courage to stand up for one's beliefs amidst adversity.We discussed: Wendy's journey of faith deconstruction and her evolution towards a more personalized belief system.Effects of Mormon Church doctrines on LGBTQ+ individuals and their families, including mental health challenges and social stigmasThe aftermath of the Supreme Court's marriage equality decision Subsequent Mormon church policy targeting LGBTQIA+ members and their children.The increase in suicide rates among LGBTQIA+ youth regarding church's policy.Establishing healthy boundaries and finding strength in their experiences.Use of the Enneagram as a tool for self-discovery and personal growth.To learn more about Wendy Montgomery:Website: https://www.wendymontgomery.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/wendymontcoach/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/people/Wendy-Montgomery-Coaching/100084535879114/Learn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Our conversation with IFS lead trainer Sue Richmond.On this edition of the Unburdened podcast, we have Sue Richmond is a well-known therapist and one of the primary instructors of the Internal Family Systems Model. Sue does both private psychotherapy and IFS consultancy in Connecticut. She applies the IFS concept to both individuals and groups, using a kind and heart-centered approach.Sue's journey is not just her story—it's an exploration of the internal struggle many face when their personal truths clash with religious doctrine, especially within the LGBTQ+ community. Her powerful narrative of a troubled childhood, marked by a parent's PTSD and alcoholism, unfolds to reveal a woman who found strength and solace in her unwavering faith. We discussed: Pursuing social work over holy orders, focusing on helping marginalized communities.The struggle to find a faith community that accepts LGBTQ+ individuals.Psychotherapy and spirituality’s role in addressing faith, sexuality, and identity.Understanding one's 'parts' to achieve psychological wholeness.Holistic therapeutic approach that integrates spirituality and emotion for authentic self-connection.Development and application of IFS therapy as a transformative tool for healing.To learn more about Sue Richmond:Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sue-richmond-668074154/Learn more about the Unburdened podcast: Instagram: @theunburdenedpodcastPatreon: https://www.patreon.com/Unburdened

Our conversation with EMDR therapist Erin Evanson-LassIn another profound episode of the Unburdened podcast, we are privileged to have a  chat with Erin Evanson-Lass, an LCSW, EMDR Certified Therapist and Approved Consultant with EMDRIA, a Maiberger Institute Certified EMDR Therapist, Consultant and Training Facilitator, and the owner of Waypoints Counseling - a small group practice of dedicated therapists trained in EMDR and support staff noted for its focus on treating trauma.Erin discusses the complex journey of healing from spiritual trauma, shedding light on the transformative power of EMDR therapy. She shares her insights on navigating the aftermath of high-control group influence, underscoring the challenges of finding autonomy and the human need for belonging.  We discussed: The need for therapists to recognize and address spiritual trauma.Use of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) as a transformative therapy method.Complexities of helping clients who are awakening to the existence of their trauma, particularly those coming from high-control group dynamics.Need for belonging and control, highlighting the risks and difficulties individuals face when leaving high-control groups.Damaging effects of spiritual abuse and purity culture, using Jennifer Knapp’s experiences as an example. Journey of healing  and the courage required to reshape a new faith identity.To learn more about Erin Evanson-Lass: Website: waypointscounselingpllc.com  LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/erin-evanson-lass-lcsw-0b834b8  

Our conversation with Anna Clark Miller, trauma therapist, host of the Marytr. She Wrote podcast and author of the Religious Trauma Survival Guide.In this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we sat down with Anna Clark-Miller, a licensed counselor, trainer, and author who focuses on religious trauma and abuse. She hosts the podcast Martyr, She Wrote, providing education and support for religious trauma survivors. Anna is also the author of the Religious Trauma Survival Guide, offering practical help for healing from controlling religious experiences.Anna looks back to her childhood as a missionary child in the Philippines, when identity loss and guilt were brought on by social pressure to fit in. Drawing from her experiences, she tackles the tough questions about the path to recovery from religious trauma, exploring introspection, validating emotions, and embracing self-compassion.We discussed: Anna’s struggles with identity, and the role of shame in her lifeUnderstanding religious trauma, the challenges of deconstructionRecognizing the impact of high-control religious environments on personal trustThe transformative power of therapy in recovering from spiritual scarsValidating emotions as a vital step in recovery, instead of dismissing themStrategies and solutions for recovery, rather than dwelling on the pastTo learn more about Anna Clark Miller: Website: https://www.empathyparadigmtherapy.com/Book: https://www.amazon.com/Religious-Trauma-Survival-Guide-Professionals/dp/B0CHL5FGBMPodcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/martyr-she-wrote/id1644003708

Our conversation with Rev Monica Dobbins about her journey from fundamentalist Christianity to Unitarian UniversalismIn this episode of the Unburdened podcast, we’ll embark on a transformative journey with Reverend Monica Dobbins, assistant minister at Salt Lake City's First Unitarian Church. After growing up in a fundamentalist Christian environment, Monica traveled through several religious traditions, including Zen Buddhism, before discovering Unitarian Universalism to be her true home.Monica talks about the nuances of leaving a high-control religion and the culture shock that can ensue when transitioning to a more open and accepting faith community. Through her personal journey from fundamentalism, Monica shares how her experiences continue to influence her ministry today.We discussed: Cultural challenges faced when transitioning from high-control religions to more open faith communities.Monica’s process of deconstruction and reclaiming aspects of her faith.The importance of community support for those questioning their faith and the liberating experience of embracing life's unanswered questions.Rejecting harmful in-group/out-group dynamics and the inerrancy of scripture, while still upholding the inherent dignity of all individuals.Emphasis on the value of stillness, divine guidance, and spiritual growth.To learn more about Reverend Monica Dobbins:Website: https://www.monicadobbins.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mddobbins/