Share

TONTS.
What It Means To Be A Man with Sandeep Varma
This conversation you’re about to hear today is with an old friend of mine who I met through volunteering with kids from tricky back grounds, taking them on camps over the school holidays. This is actually inadvertently how I met my husband man James too but that’s a story for another day. Sandeep Varma is someone I've always admired for his intelligence, tenacity, positivity and kindness. He is someone who knows a lot about advocacy, especially in helping young people and children in his work as a lawyer. Deep also knows about shifting the way we think, about mindsets, changing the way we think about masculinity and the value of aligning your work with your values. Sandeep is a Dad to two little humans who is also the founder and CEO of SAARI Collective a media start up and community for South Asian Australians. He is passionate about amplifying South Asian voices, building community, anti-racism and delivering social change. He has worked across so many sectors with roles such as a speechwriter, lawyer, leader and advocate for children’s rights. Deep is also the board chair at 100 Story Building, a social enterprise for young creative writers and in all his spare time is also the four time Australian Chilli cooking champion for his famous chilli con carne. Settle in for a lovely wide ranging conversation I dare you to not be inspired by Sandeep Varma.
Links discussed in today's episode:
Man Enough with Justin Baldoni
The Artist's Way Morning Pages with Julia Cameron
For more from Sandeep you can head to Saaricollective.com.au
And you can find me at @clairetonti on instagram or at www.clairetonti.com or subscribe to my newsletter here
As always thank you to RAW Collings for editing this week's episode.
More episodes
View all episodes

Matrescence Festival with Claire Tonti & Lizzy Humber
29:09|Welcome to the final episode of TONTS season 5 Matrescence Festival edition. Today, we take the time to reflect on the full two days of the festival, how it came to be and what its future looks like. We encourage you to please let us know how felt listening to this series, what nobody told you and what you now know, you can that by messaging @tontspod on either Facebook and Instagram. For more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
12. Matrescence Festival with Dr Sophie Brock
33:28||Season 5, Ep. 12Welcome to first episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.In this episode you'll hear from Dr Sophie Brock, a sociologist with a focus on Motherhood. With a PhD from The University of Sydney just before becoming a mother herself, one of the main results from her research was a conceptual theory about the way Motherhood is socially constructed and individually experienced. So much of her work is about giving voice to expectations, to constructions, that are created as part of what it means to be a Mother in our world. "To connect to the authenticity of who we are, we first have to deconstruct who it is the world expect(ed) us to be." For more from Dr Sophie Brock, you can head to her website: https://drsophiebrock.com/Then after Dr Brock's talk, you'll hear from her again in a Q&A along with Jane Hardwick-Collings and Michelle Hall from our previous episodes. For more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
11. Matrescence Festival with Michelle Hall
35:36||Season 5, Ep. 11Welcome to eleventh episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.Today we have a special performance from Michelle Hall, Michelle is an independent performance maker, teaching artist, mentor, arts worker, community organiser, yoga practitioner and mother living and working on Noongar Boodja. She has trained in devising, physical theatre, Clown, Butoh and Contemporary Dance with various companies including Teatro de Complicite (UK), Pan Theatre (Fra), Laban London (UK), Giovanni Fusetti (Italy), Café Reason Butoh (UK), Augusto Boal and Cardboard Citizens (UK). To watch Michelle's performance follow this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HmNCe2sYsIAnd for more of Michelle's work you can head to her website: https://thedirtymother.com/michelle-hall/For more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
10. Matrescence Festival with Dr Winnie Orchard
44:20||Season 5, Ep. 10Welcome to the tenth episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.In this episode you'll hear from Dr Winnie Orchard again, who spoke with us earlier in the season, Dr Orchard is a cognitive neuroscientist who specialises in understanding how caregiving reshapes our brain and minds and in this episode talks specifically to those going through parenting from a queer perspective.We invite you also to take care when listening to Claire's song The Beast after Dr. Orchards talk, the music video with the dance choreography from Bonnie can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNBN7AzHeuMFor more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
9. Matrescence Festival with Jane Hardwicke-Collings & Mietta
34:51||Season 5, Ep. 9Welcome to first episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025. In this episode, we experience both Maidenhood and Sagescence, as we relish in the wisdom of Jane Hardwick-Collings and the music of Mietta.Jane Hardwicke-Collings Jane Hardwicke Collings is a post menopausal grandmother. She was an intensive care and operating theatre nurse, and then a homebirth midwife for 30 years. Now her work focuses on teaching the Women’s Mysteries and writing about them. She gives workshops on mother and daughter preparation for menstruation, the spiritual practice of menstruation, and the sacred and shamanic dimensions of pregnancy, birth and menopause. Jane founded and runs The School of Shamanic Womancraft, an international Women’s Mystery School.Mietta is a soulful indie folk singer songwriter and in a season of emergence. With deep connection to her home roots and her community she is also an education researcher, learning skills mentor, facilitator and designer of youth wellbeing and expressive writing workshops.For more from Jane, you can head to: https://www.janehardwickecollings.com where you can find her many publications.For more of Mietta's music, you can find her on Spotify here: https://open.spotify.com/artist/1SHQyvwWBmN2EU2jg9O53uFor more from Claire, you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy, you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
8. Matrescence Festival with Nartarsha Bamblett
32:00||Season 5, Ep. 8Welcome to eighth episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025. Today we welcome you to the second day of the festival and helping us to do that is the incredible Nartarsha Bamblett, a proud First Nations leader creating safe, transformative spaces for healing, learning, and collective growth. She is the founder of Queen Acknowledgements and IndigUcation, two platforms that merge storytelling, cultural education, and holistic wellbeing, Nartarsha is committed to ensuring that the strength, knowledge, and stories of First Nations people are not only heard but celebrated. She guides individuals and organisations through meaningful cultural journeys that foster reflection, healing, and collective responsibility.For more from Nartarsha, you can head to: https://www.nartarshabamblett.com.au/For more from Claire, you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy, you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
7. Matrescence Festival with Mandy Hose
36:37||Season 5, Ep. 7Welcome to seventh episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.In this episode you'll hear from Mandy Hose, a sleep and settling consultant as well as the co host of the Too Peas podcast to help all parents of multiples who live with disabilities and additional needs. Mandy wants no one to feel alone anymore, parenting on the road less travelled and has also co-authored a book called 'The Invisible Lives of Us' discussing the surprises, challenges and sheer delight of parenting twins with additional needs.As well as hearing from Mandy, you'll get to hear us close out Day One of the festival with gratitudes and words of wisdom and affirmation, as attendees discuss what they have gotten out of the festival so far. And please let us know what you've gotten out of the series so far at @tontspod on instagram. For more from Mandy you can head to: https://mandyhosesheknows.com/ or https://toopeasinapodcast.com.au/For more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
6. Matrescence Festival with Tamica Wilder
26:03||Season 5, Ep. 6Welcome to the sixth episode of TONTS Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.In this episode you'll hear from the amazing Tamica Wilder, Tamica is a somatic sex coach and multi-qualified therapist with a deep passion for teaching humans to re-attune to the wisdom of our bodies, while giving full permission to shamelessly prioritise pleasure and play. She believes that our current cultural narratives around sex, intimacy, pleasure and relationships need to change and that begins with helping to create sex-positive families and help parents build the confidence to have ‘those chats’ with their kids and other family members.For more from Tamica you can find her book 'Wild Honey' or follow her on instagram @themomsexologistFor more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan
5. Matrescence Festival with Amy Taylor-Kabbaz & Dr Winnie Orchard
19:43||Season 5, Ep. 5Welcome to the fifth episode of TONTS. Season 5 Matrescence Festival edition, join us as we look back through our Melbourne festival from March 2025.In this episode we're joined again by the wonderful Amy Taylor-Kabbaz and Dr Winnie Orchard, who you will have heard earlier in the festival, as they discuss the restructuring of the brain during Matrescence, hormones, neurodivergence in parents and much more.For more from Amy, you can visit Amy Taylor Kabbaz or pick up a copy of her book 'Mama Rising'.For more from Claire you can head to: https://www.clairetonti.com/ or her instagram @clairetontiFor more from Lizzy you can head to: https://www.lizzyhumber.com/ or her instagram @lizzyhumberAnd to keep up to date with past and upcoming Matrescence festivals you can follow @matrescencefestival on instagram or go to https://www.matrescencefestival.co.ukOriginal theme music: Free by Claire TontiEditing: Maisie JGSocial Media: Surabhi Pradhan