Time to Lean

In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss the 2019 Netflix film, ‘Marriage Story,’ which starred Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson. A popular clip is circulating on social media again and made us wonder: with all the passing of responsibility and finger-pointing and tantruming—was it all just cis-het propaganda??Mentioned in this Episode:Pre-Order Laura’s Book! – No More MediocreLaura’s Substack Article from Last EpisodeScarlett Longstreet's Instagram Post: “Five Things I Wish I Knew Before Getting Divorced”

This week, we’re digging into a few clips from @leftonread_show that had us feeling things! We talk about what it means to be “cool" and whether or not the host's advice to play hard to get is ACTUALLY good advice. A lighthearted one today. <3 Let’s get into it.—Find more at timetoleanpod.substack.com for resources, ad-free episodes, and more.Follow Laura @thatdarnchat → thatdarnchat.substack.comFollow Crystal @itscrystalbritt → itscrystalbritt.substack.comSubscribe, rate, and share if you love the show.Preorder No More Mediocre now.If you or someone you know needs support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org.

This is a weird one. Crystal has been slammed and Laura couldn't get a painting out of her head, so she decided to write(and read) about it. In this episode, Laura reads something she wrote about an unfinished painting of a mother.PLEASE PARDON LAURA'S FRENCH. :) Check out the painting here!Madame de Pastoret and Her Son, 1791–92Artist: Jacques-Louis David (French, 1748–1825)Here's her husband.Here's her son. Get resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call To Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreFollow Laura: @thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.comFollow Crystal: @itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comSubscribe, rate, and share to help others find the showIf you or someone you know needs support: The National Domestic Violence Hotline | 800-799-7233

In this episode, we talk about how vulnerable it can feel to name a need, the weight of perceived pushback, and how quickly it can spiral. We dig into what we call the nag paradox—that toxic loop of asking, resisting, escalating, and shutting down—and how it traps so many of us in a cycle of sacrifice, resentment, and disconnection.Mentioned:Wages For Housework by Emily Callaci Get resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call To Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreFollow Laura: @thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.comFollow Crystal: @itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comSubscribe, rate, and share to help others find the showIf you or someone you know needs support: The National Domestic Violence Hotline | 800-799-7233

A listener sent us a video that hit a nerve: a husband asks his overwhelmed wife how he can help, then resists the very thing she asks for. In this episode, we unpack what’s really going on in moments like these. We talk about the emotional weight of asking for help, the nuances of saying no, and what it costs when a partner responds with resistance(even subtly). Emotional labor, the mental load, relationship dynamics, viral couples videos... it's all here!Mentioned in this episode:Rage Becomes HerWages For HouseworkNo More MediocreGet resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call To Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreFollow Laura: @thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.comFollow Crystal: @itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comSubscribe, rate, and share to help others find the showIf you or someone you know needs support: The National Domestic Violence Hotline | 800-799-7233

This week, we look at a viral influencer’s take on why men don’t step up at home. He's just one of many creators who exist in the genre of “relationship advice” whose content insidiously blames women for their partner’s lack of initiative. Apparently, the problem with a lack of effort isn't... the lack of effort... It's that you must be smothering his divine masculine spark.Mentioned in this episode:Rage Becomes Her by Soraya ChemalyBoyMom by Ruth WhippmanErased by Anna Malaika TubbsThe Future Is Disabled by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna SamarasinhaCare Work by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna SamarasinhaSubscribe, rate, and follow us:@timetoleanpod | timetoleanpod.substack.com@thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.com@itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call to Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreNeed support? Visit thehotline.org

This week Crystal and Laura discuss the challenges of care work, societal expectations of default partners, and the internet's attempts at poking fun at these dynamics. Spoiler alert: we don't think it's funny. We analyze a viral video that pokes fun at a woman managing her family's needs while being late, highlighting the unfairness of couples comedy posts. Instead of trying to punch down, shouldn't we be trying to emphasize the importance of recognizing the value of care work, questioning societal norms, and teaching children about responsibility and empathy?Mentioned in This Episode:Our Home by Lori Sugarman-Li, a childrens book on domestic equity!If you'd like to listen to us AD FREE, subscribe to us on Substack!

In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss planning ahead when one partner takes on a new task--should you make contingency plans just in case they mess it up? Mentioned in This Episode:Fight Right by the GottmansLike what you hear? Join the conversation on Substack!

In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss a clip from the popular Showtime show, “Couples Therapy,” where a pair of clients discuss incompetence, ability, and blame.Disclaimer:Time to Lean is an educational and conversational podcast intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views expressed by the hosts and guests are their own and do not constitute therapeutic advice, clinical guidance, or a substitute for professional mental health care. While we speak from lived experience and professional backgrounds, we’re not your therapists—and this podcast is not therapy.Please consult a qualified mental health provider if you’re experiencing distress or need individualized support. And remember: systemic change takes all of us, but you don’t have to do it all alone.