The ClearOut

In this episode, Dara is weighing up winning and losing. His football team is driving him to the brink of all-consuming rage, so much so that he sought out escapism in a TV show dedicated to gory bloodletting, heartrending betrayals, and gratuitous equal opportunity nudity. One climactic moment was so compelling that the vicarious exultation caused Dara to leap from his chair, fists thrust emphatically skywards in celebration. One standout performance is given special mention.A much-needed release? Or simply happy for a favourite character doing well? Deeper probing reveals thoughts on how extreme emotions can be very telling, especially when they are a break from the norm. Dara acknowledges a need for something to cheer, even though generally he finds life gives him plenty of reasons to be grateful. Nonetheless, he does ask if you think you have a life worth sharing. What would that look like? And what is the role of gratitude and perspective when it comes to evaluating what one has?Things accumulate, things bite, things corrode...Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this episode, Dara is wondering how 250 episodes have come along so quickly. It hasn't been an effortless process by any means, but somehow the show (or 'the tell') has kept trundling along, quietly going about its business. And what business is that, exactly?Amongst other things, it has been an offer of quiet and reflective positivity in the wake of the Covid pandemic and an alternative to much of the shrieking discourse of an increasingly distressed world. It has also been the attempt to cultivate a genuinely authentic and honest voice via personal storytelling and unapologetic vulnerability. It has largely been monologues with occasional and welcome guests, but the conversation has been primarily between Dara and whoever has been listening. Finally, it has continued to try to be...'Wellness, with attitude'.For this special milestone episode, Dara decides to share an extended extract from a piece of writing that he started a couple of years ago. Part memoir, part autofiction, part identity excavation, 'Monkey-Boots' is something that will hopefully become a book at some point in the future, but for now, like Dara, it's a work in progress.If you have been, thanks for listening!Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this episode Dara is reckoning with the elusive nature of grace. According to the major religions, and Judaism specifically, it is 'a free gift of love' from the Almighty. But if not given by God, from where else might it come? Is it something that we can bestow on ourselves? What conditions need to be in place for that to happen? Is it possible it might come from the award-winning TV show The Pitt? Part of the pathway to grace may involve the total leaving behind of the self. Difficult to achieve most of the time when it involves others, almost impossible when it involves oneself. But there's something about entering a flow state than seems to bring it more into reach. And speaking of flow, what is flowing in the deepest, defining part of ourselves?Time and space are part of the conversation too. If we allow ourselves to be slaves to the tyranny of time, it is unlikely we will access anything resembling inner calm or presence of mind. So much potential resides in the directions we point ourselves and the pathways we are interested in uncovering. Also, if we can't see ourselves, how can we find ourselves?Dandelion heads, karate kicks and Irish gangsters are also in the mix.Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this episode, Dara keeps it in low gear as he attempts to conserve energy and resist the temptation to force anything. Most of all, he is determined to be uninteresting and anything but entertaining. He knows his credo and he's sticking to it! A conversation with a friend has him thinking about happiness. Happy states and happy places. The dream of the perfect getaway seems to never lose its appeal, but Dara finds himself arguing for the internal oasis. The self-evident reality is that no matter where we go, we always bring ourselves with us, so shouldn't we be more concerned with creating the conditions in our daily lives that remove the desperate need for escape?What is this relationship we have with desire, appetite, and yearning? How do those sensations relate to lack and abundance? And are we more thrilled by the chase than the capture? And what comes first - a state of being or a state of mind? Dara wonders if far less sexy concepts like balance, alignment and regulation might be part of the solution. But what exactly do spunky young cowboys have to do with all of this?Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this episode, Dara is responding to three films he recently watched that all touched on themes of the expression of the individual, sovereign identity, iterations of 20th century masculinity, and the concept of success and failure implicit in those performances.Starting with two documentaries, one covering the life and career of Broadway performer and choreographer Maurice Hines, once of the dance duo The Hines Brothers with younger sibling Gregory, the other doing the same for Carl Lewis, the outstanding athlete of his generation who refused to conform to the behavioural expectations of 80s America, especially as a young, beautiful black man. Each of Hines and Lewis walked their own path with a single-minded focus and application, and each embodied distinctly unconventional modes of black masculinity for which the former found the perfect ecosystem, but for which the latter was relentlessly ridiculed.Paul Thomas Anderson's 2012 film The Master - informed substantially by the life of L. Ron Hubbard - is also discussed in relation to the struggle for selfhood of the American male, captured in two indelible performances by Joaquin Phoenix and Philip Seymour Hoffman as men compulsively drawn to each other by a mutual and oppositional fascination. Brittle, sensual, flawed and explosive - they are more alike than they might realise. But ultimately, there is no consummation. Which makes their characters, fictional though they are, far less successful than the subjects of the aforementioned documentaries.Also covered: Sidney Poitier's electric moment, Francis Ford Coppola's failure to do what Ryan Coogler has done so well, a history of Black cinema, and an existential concept of happiness.The Slate article on L. Ron Hubbard and The Master: https://slate.com/culture/2012/09/the-master-and-scientology-just-how-much-of-lancaster-dodd-comes-from-l-ron-hubbard.htmlWebsite: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

Is there one good idea in this episode? Dara admits he is all over the place at the moment. He is not burnt out, just a bit overwhelmed. Between ageing parents in need of comprehensive care, trying to find work, doing a masters, and just keeping up with the normal day-to-day demands, it feels like a lot. So he sits down at the mic without a plan and decides to see if anything comes to him.Guess what - it does! He wonders about the power of attitude in identifying things to be grateful for. That same attitudinal lens can be brought to bear on life's endless difficulties and challenges. What about dumping the blame game and concentrating on forward movement? What about valuing your own life and your own 'stuff' to just the right extent, avoiding the pitfalls of self-absorption?Dara reflects on the power of dreams, defining wisdom, failing to find solutions in others, and the inevitability of bumping into yourself again and again. He also lays out his theory about hardship and love and how that explains why men don't cry.If only one useful idea comes out of this episode, then it has been a success.Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this strong and dominant episode, Dara shares his muscular response to Louis Theroux's new documentary exploring the dreaded manosphere. As Lori Petty said in 1991's Point Break - "too much testosterone around here for me".Why are young men so obsessed with the dubious figures that define the so-called manosphere? Aggressive, misogynist, and utterly confused about what they call 'traditional values', these men are holding on so tight that it is no surprise that they are actually very thin-skinned - it's all that flexing!Dara reflects on his own experiences working with angry young men when he was a teacher and presents a case for holding space that can accommodate reflection and dialogue and non-judgement. Discussing his ongoing involvement with the What Does He Need? project, he tries to explain his approach to the work and how his own embodiment of masculinity is so important to the process.And why should Kenneth Lonergan's Manchester by the Sea be prescribed viewing for the manosphere influencers?What Does He Need? masculinity project: https://www.whatdoesheneed.com/Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout

In this episode, Dara is considering Scottish psychiatrist R.D. Laing's proposition that "love is a cover for violence". Informed by Game Theory and the work he did with twelve female schizophrenic patients in the 1960s, Laing came to believe the manipulative interpersonal dynamics that were playing out behind closed doors were effectively driving the Glasgow housewives mad. However, Laing concluded that the madness was a form of self-defence and arguably the only sane response to the oppressive nature of what the women were experiencing.Dara leans into Laing's world of power and control in family relations and contextualises it within the terms of Game Theory - the idea that humans are endlessly strategising and hedging with one another as they try to achieve their personal goals while simultaneously understanding that the people they are dealing with are doing the same. It makes Dara consider the nature of the human mind as evolved from the simian line as opposed to the canine mind which can be traced to wolves - the premise of the 2008 Mark Rowlands book - The Philosopher and the Wolf. Are humans simply evolutionarily devious and selfish? And what does that have to do with our relationship with cats and dogs?Also in this episode, life as computer game, loving against the tide, and the spiciest toothpaste of them all!Website: https://theclearout.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theclearoutpodcast/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theclearoutpodcast/YouTube: The ClearOut PodcastEmail: theclearoutlive@gmail.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/theclearout