The Useless Hotline

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13George🎵 Copyrighted music licensed from Lickd. https://lickd.coThe Scientist by Coldplay, https://t.lickd.co/l/VpYDOP33wJG

Description: This week, we’re joined by TikTok & Youtube sensations - the hosts of The Useless Hotline podcast - George Clarke and Max Balegde!So listen in as the duo dives into all the wildly unhinged ways they’d spend a £200,000,000 EuroMillions jackpot. From a time-traveling mukbang to cancel Henry VIII, to a spiteful loft conversion built solely to annoy Max with loud Pasodoble dancing, to the ultimate morning routine on the 10-minute “cleaner coaster”Subscribe and follow for new episodes every Friday!!!Apple Podcasts: https://tinyurl.com/ycyfv2fcOn Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/4ths7nedOn TikTok: https://tinyurl.com/4d9k5457On Instagram: https://tinyurl.com/ykumd329On YouTube: https://tinyurl.com/yxyruujdBrought to you by EuroMillions from The National Lottery and Acast Creative ✨

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comORSend a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIlWhy not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok:https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube:https://youtube.com/@max_balegdeGeorge’s YouTube:https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1George’s TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1Max’s Instagram:https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=George’s Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13George

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13George00:00 - Feeling like a mushy yogurt: opening reflections00:12 - Tour update: halfway through Australia, Brisbane rooftop recording00:40 - Aussie sounds: sirens, busy streets, and Melbourne-Melbourne crossover01:30 - Youthful adventures: scooter rides in rain and birthdays in Auckland02:50 - Wild Auckland stories: street fights, blood pools, and chaotic brawls04:02 - New Zealand’s unique culture and stunning landscapes05:10 - Sydney arrival: heat, traffic, and city impressions06:45 - Australian food obsessions: yogurt, snacks, and food scene comparisons07:55 - Meeting Robert Irwin: zoo visits, celebrity stories, and family legacy09:20 - The passionate Irwin family and Steve Irwin’s legacy10:50 - Fans, meet and greets, and the magnetic energy of live shows12:30 - Funny stories of exotic encounters and local characters13:45 - Reflections on the journey and plans to return to these incredible countries15:00 - Wrapping up: gratitude for fans, upcoming shows, and future adventures

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comORSend a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIlWhy not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok:https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube:https://youtube.com/@max_balegdeGeorge’s YouTube:https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1George’s TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1Max’s Instagram:https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=George’s Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13GeorgeTimestamps00:00 - Introduction: Getting in the dark at Hobbiton and tour prep chaos06:09 - Hobbiton vs. the Hobbits: Clearing up the Lord of the Rings lore10:10 - Australia tour: Tickets, dates, and how to join the fun in Sydney, Melbourne, and more15:01 - The UK tour highlights: dance routines, technical challenges, and character costumes16:22 - Rehearsal stories: Spontaneous dance numbers, stage mishaps, and improvisation19:08 - The chaos of stage blackouts and find-my-microphone moments20:21 - Entertainment: Irish jigs, Miss Piggy costumes, and audience reactions24:52 - Funny on-stage confessions and risqué moments, including Andrew’s comedy bits26:20 - Travel tales from Japan and new adventures planned, including Disney and Pokémon34:26 - Marathon journey: training snippets, race stories, unexpected injuries40:10 - Theme parks: Queue horror stories, ride experiences, and comparisons across Japan and Florida45:54 - The magic of Disney: Hidden details, park secrets, and fan dedication50:00 - Final tour call-to-action: Tickets, gratitude, and upcoming shows

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13GeorgeChapters00:00 Introduction and Setup03:00 Life on Tour and Experiences in Bristol06:04 Humorous Anecdotes and Stories09:03 Discussion on Murder and Crime in Bristol12:03 Reflections on Life and Morality15:02 Plans for Break and Future Guests18:00 Literary References and Fun Conversations18:17 Celebrating World Book Day24:39 Memorable World Book Day Costumes30:01 The Impact of Water Parks36:59 Gratitude for Fans and Experiences

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13George00:00 - Intro: Our tour journey and what to expect from this episode00:20 - Hilarious tour start and Belfast dressing room chaos02:18 - Tour highlights and strange fan encounters04:10 - Strictly dance wins and the chaos around voting05:50 - Funny school stories and learning disabilities on tour07:45 - The drunken Irish night out and mishaps12:05 - The epic night out in Newcastle gone wrong14:10 - Stage antics and the drunken club appearance stories18:20 - Audience antics, fan stories, and backstage surprises22:18 - The mysterious "Chopped Cow" fanfic and ridiculous fan interactions26:37 - Audience behavior, crowd engagement, and wildest moments30:45 - General tour reflections, upcoming shows, and the travel chaos35:42 - The differences between social media fans and live audiences37:14 - Tour wrap-up, gratitude to fans, and future plans

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13GeorgeTimestamps:00:00 - Intro to the episode and what it covers00:20 - Tour stories and hotel mishaps in Sheffield02:08 - Woke up hair and quarantine-style hair struggles04:13 - Sheffield city vibe and impressions from Max05:22 - Tour logistics: number of stops and tour crowd size06:42 - The mysterious "six or seven" quantifier and its cultural significance07:48 - The viral "6, 7" meme and its generational reach08:18 - Embarrassing fan cam moments at concerts09:02 - The rules of on-tour games and the "Johnny Johnny" challenge10:16 - Vito’s tour vlogs and dancing obsession11:12 - Venue sizes: from Wembley to Palladium and ticket sell-outs12:02 - Tour marketing strategies and ticket sales insight13:08 - Meet and greet tickets and Bristol’s special spot in the tour14:21 - Post-Nashville night out plans and fun clips from the tour20:02 - The innovative PlayStation Portal device and upcoming Australian tour21:32 - Australian media appearances and pronunciation struggles22:28 - Anxiety over international impressions and speaking nerves24:16 - Upcoming audio cues and halftime fun during the tour26:01 - The game: "Does George care about this?" — pop culture topics quiz27:15 - Grammys, Bad Bunny’s power move, and celebrity moments28:44 - Nostalgia for iconic award show moments and Twitter rabbit holes30:24 - Nicki Minaj’s controversial hand-holding and celebrity gossip35:16 - The Jeffrey Epstein files: celebrity involvement and conspiracy theories39:48 - The Kia Asylum metaphor explained—artists trapped in obscurity or success41:16 - Debating whether Sabrina Carpenter and Katy Perry are "out" or "inside" the Kia43:39 - The episode’s closing thoughts and the audience's role in sending dilemmas47:18 - Final call for concise, funny audience stories and instructions48:34 - Sign-off and excitement for upcoming shows and audience meetups

Join our Patreon!!! - https://www.patreon.com/TheUselessHotlineWelcome to The Useless Hotline hosted by Max Balegde and George Clarke. A place to send your queries and dilemmas no matter how big, small, weird, or embarrassing. We can’t guarantee good advice or that you will leave a changed person, but we can guarantee that this is a useless hotline.Subscribe and join us every Sunday as we tackle your problems head on and on occasion will be helped by some faces you may recognise on a trial shift.Submit your queries/ dilemmas here:theuselesshotlinepodcast@gmail.comOR Send a voice note to our Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= You can also listen here:Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-useless-hotline/id1656588234 Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/5zHCHHfKk6b3m2VLJA0tIl Why not follow our socials so you don’t miss out on any of the latest news?Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theuselesshotlinepod?_t=8XhEHip5lET&_r=1 Instagram:https://instagram.com/theuselesshotlinepod?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= Hosts Socials:Max’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@max_balegde George’s YouTube: https://youtube.com/@georgeclarkeMax’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@max_balegde?_t=8XhDjkFsoX0&_r=1 George’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@georgeclarkeey?_t=8XhDmpUzS21&_r=1 Max’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/max_balegde?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= George’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/georgeclarkeey/ George’s Twitter:https://twitter.com/Clarke13GeorgeChapters00:00 Nicki Minaj and Donald Trump: A Political Shift03:00 Life in the Spotlight: Touring and Hosting Events05:52 Olympic Aspirations: From Bobsled to Curling09:06 Figure Skating and Curling: Behind the Scenes11:59 The Evolution of Music and Celebrity Culture14:57 The Price of Fame: Ticket Prices and Fan Reactions17:58 The Changing Landscape of Rap and Rivalries31:03 The Evolution of TikTok Personalities34:58 Nostalgia for Viral Moments38:53 The Rise and Fall of Internet Fame41:01 The Business of Cameo and Monetization56:51 Reflections on the Cameo Experience