Share
The Upshot
Sacre Bleu! French football’s strange and sordid decade
•
Masked hitmen. Sex tape blackmail. Organ harvesting allegations.
It’s been an incredibly weird, sexually charged, and occasionally glorious decade for French football.
We’re joined by ESPN’s Julien Laurens as we dive into Les Bleus' sinister sexual psychodrama...
For more tales of sporting scandal, join 100,000+ subscribers who get our free weekly email:
https://www.upshot.email/subscribe?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=poddescription
More episodes
View all episodes
John Terry returns to haunt Wayne Bridge
50:29|Plus: Emmanuel Petit condemns his Arsenal coach to death, a Real Madrid legend caught smuggling illegal seafood and a Brazilian star’s bonking calendar.Join Zach and Jack for another edition of Extra Shot, the weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.If you’re enjoying the pod please share it with your friends on WhatsApp.Links from the pod:KSI trash talking Wayne Bridge: https://x.com/HappyPunch/status/1881364413514756161 Emmanuel Petit “RIP Pat Rice”: https://x.com/ChrisPrice_86/status/1881476716851531989 Fabio Coentrao arguing with reporters: https://x.com/_hilikus_/status/1879891169704112391 Devyerson diving when the referee touches him: https://x.com/Rainmaker1973/status/1863264377878560869Nick Kyrgios: he banged your girlfriend bro
01:07:43|With guest Josh Berry (@joshberrycomedy)The world of tennis is filled with highly-strung oddballs. But no one is quite like Nick Kyrgios.The Aussie maverick terrorises umpires, scraps in the locker room and shags fans on a weekly basis.From masked gunmen to pre-match benders at Wimbledon, meet the bad boy of the baseline…Links from the pod:Bollocking umpires: https://youtu.be/P0dKBZNzxog?si=n-YAw9A7qX6Pu3K1&t=10 “Kokkinakis banged your girlfriend”: https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2015/aug/13/kokkinakis-banged-your-girlfriend-nick-kyrgios-sledges-stan-wawrinka Wanking with a water bottle at Queen’s: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GHkg5Xx18s Press conference after night at the pub with journalists: https://www.tiktok.com/@nickkyrgios/video/7331678792403995905And spotting a friend: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/R3tRpQiVRyIScrapping with Croatian coaches in the locker room: https://youtu.be/Mj-y_g8xQTY?si=pLVvCSFQqlwdxkzr&t=340 “She’s had about 700 drinks bro”: https://youtu.be/gHKvubR5-Cs?si=sYA19mjigvyrabVh&t=35Is Jake Humphrey a bellend?
53:15|Plus: Pep’s bollocking teenagers, Ray Parlour’s WW2 punditry and Lazio sack their mascot over his penis operation photoshoot.Join Zach and Jack for another edition of Extra Shot, the weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.If you’re enjoying the pod please share it with your friends on WhatsApp etc so our audience numbers shoot up faster than Juan Bernabe’s prosthetic.Links from the pod:Lazio falconer’s prosthetic penis (NOT suitable for work): https://x.com/Zenxkami/status/1878780545376948298Ray Parlour’s WW2 punditry: https://x.com/AJ_909/status/1878021868940071212 Graeme Souness “that cat’s done nothing wrong”: https://x.com/SkySportsPL/status/1492913779151151105 Pep bollocking autograph hunters: https://x.com/Football__Tweet/status/1878518572357501283 Joe Biden Black and Tans blunder: https://x.com/DazmanOnline/status/1646233718544007187Maradona the manager: keep on sucking (part 2)
33:50|Welcome back to part two of Diego in the dugout.At the end of part one, Maradona had left football behind to wallow in a life of booze, burgers and booty.But in 2008, he returns to Argentine football for the biggest job of all. And that’s where the chaos really starts…With guest JP Lockwood.Links from the pod:Belly sliding down the touchline against Peru: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4sdPODn4S0 Running over a reporter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xU_QQBoSphc&t=6s Diego off his face at the 2018 World Cup: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cY7S4ex-7BM Post match interview for Dorados: https://x.com/ESPNUK/status/1066991711929466880 Doing coke on the touchline: https://www.reddit.com/r/DanLeBatardShow/comments/f63x9t/diego_maradona_getting_a_bag_of_coke_on_the/Boca Juniors’ syphilis outbreak
54:57|Plus: The FA Cup manager keeping crocodiles in his bungalow, Brazil striker Hulk finally marries his niece, and what do Adrian Mutu, Friedrich Nietszche and Hitler have in common?Join Zach and Jack for another edition of Extra Shot, our weekly pod spilling the funniest stories in sport this week.Subscribe to our newsletter and get a five min rundown of the funniest stories in sport in your inbox every Friday:https://www.upshot.email/subscribe?utm_source=pod Links from the pod:Messi speaking English in the Bad Boys 4 trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JY1K5pxcX5k Southampton fan booed for predicting 5-0 defeat: https://x.com/HugoScheckter/status/1875613672359522817Maradona the manager: all the gear but no idea (part 1)
39:08|When you unleash the pure chaos of Diego Maradona in the dugout, it's going to be a wild ride.As a manager, Diego ran over reporters, threatened to kill Liam Gallagher and snorted coke on the touchline.Meet Maradona the manager...With guest JP Lockwood.Links from the pod:Giving two middle fingers to the crowd at Racing Club: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/AU1jy8Af1EI Liam Gallagher recalls meeting Diego: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUNHaq_xOEk Partying at Rio Carnival: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWlLEdgP2EA Shooting journalists with an air rifle: https://youtu.be/bGDhj26Onq4?si=nYujSHOoDQphgDPs&t=25 Maradona at 19 stone: https://images.app.goo.gl/hw79TiRxmbgSX2ZW9 Doing headers with Pele: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjtA1J9XxpABurglars, bullseyes, and bathtubs of wine: let’s play darts!
01:06:03|Darts was once a humble pub game where tubby punters hustled pensioners for pork scratchings.But in the 1970s, everything changed.As darts went prime time, a rabble of chain-smoking boozehounds were catapulted to a life of mega stardom, from bathtubs of wine to sex-starved American groupies.Laaaaaaaaaaadieeeeeessss and gentlemeeeeeeeeeeen. Let’s. Play. Darts. With guest Ruth Husko.Links from the pod:Bobby George nipple flap shirt: https://x.com/joshpearson180/status/1692225614252552702 Jocky Wilson popping out false teeth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zau1C6wtcc0Jordan Henderson’s Amsterdam sauna adventures
56:39|You’ve opened your presents, polished off the miserable turkey detritus and your racist aunt has finally gone back to Tarrington St Clement.So treat yaself to a quick hit of sporting scandal. It’s Extra Shot…Get ya pubes in order for grandma and 20% off when you use code UPSHOT at http://www.manscaped.com Subscribe to our newsletter and get a five min rundown of the funniest stories in sport in your inbox every Friday:https://www.upshot.email/subscribe?utm_source=pod Links from the pod:Jason Tindall Last Christmas: https://x.com/FtblJoe/status/1871811440937709874Tindall Wham jumper: https://www.telegraph.co.uk/content/dam/football/2024/12/27/TELEMMGLPICT000406353430_17353020956200_trans_NvBQzQNjv4BqxMck747CUKptGWAGQbw16Ke11_axAzbecJbmqTci52M.jpeg?imwidth=350Jordan Henderson long read in Athletic: https://www.nytimes.com/athletic/6012945/2024/12/23/jordan-henderson-ajax-year-of-living-differently/Spanish Scrabble champion: https://d.latintimes.com/en/full/564771/nigel-richards-scrabble.jpg?w=736&f=bf7d84cbcfd8ab9f3fcc429d50488d74Poison attacks and cannibal scientists: the twisted world of ballet
54:19|The word ballet conjures images of dead-eyed aristocrats peering through tiny binoculars at neurotic gymnasts.But behind the velvet curtain, lies a sinister world of hard drugs, poison attacks and cannibal scientists.From vaginal magic shows to Prince Philip’s mistress, welcome to the dark side of the dance…With guest Erica North.Links from the pod:Clip from The Crown when the Queen discover’s Philip’s mistress: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIcpK34jzcU“You had your own ballerina’s for that”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5P9Mz1WqqHQ Prince Philip’s boys club scene: https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/10930861/prince-philip-thursday-club-the-crown-real-story-inside-sex-secrets-spies/