The Gen Mess with Tess

What if the person giving you life advice is, behind the scenes, completely falling apart?In this deeply moving solo episode of Gen Mess with Tess, Tess Brigham pulls back the curtain, sharing the raw, unfiltered story of a year that shook the very foundations of her life. From the staggering loss of her father to the painful journey of caring for her mother as dementia set in, Tess Brigham—the certified coach and licensed therapist—describes what happens when every piece of her own identity is "activated in crisis mode."Far from the highlight reels and inspirational soundbites, this episode reveals the messy, complicated realities even therapists and coaches face. Tess Brigham explores generational differences in dealing with grief, mental health, self-reliance, and asking for help—drawing wisdom (and exposing blind spots) from Boomers, Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z. She reflects on the exhausting duality of caring for aging parents while supporting her own child through mental health struggles, and how real-life heartbreak changed her perspective as both a professional and a human being.Key highlights include:The overlooked emotional cost of being the "strong one" in the familyGenerational patterns and how each age group defines asking for help and resilienceWhy anticipatory grief and caretaking are acts of love—and also sources of silent painLessons Tess Brigham is carrying forward, and the generational beliefs she's choosing to leave behindA vulnerable reminder that "hanging tough" means allowing yourself to soften, seek support, and be humanThis solo episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating family caregiving, loss, or simply questioning how we all handle life's hardest seasons.Episode Overview 00:00 – Intro Announcer sets up the show's generational lens00:31 – Tess Brigham addresses why sharing her own story matters03:02 – Navigating simultaneous personal crises: parental loss, caregiving, and self-identity06:33 – The unique grief of losing a parent's mind versus a parent's body08:40 – Generational patterns: independence, vulnerability, and the cost of stoicism11:32 – Tess Brigham on what Millennials and Gen Z are teaching the rest of us13:05 – The realities of “functioning” through grief and anticipatory loss17:17 – Each generation’s wisdom, and what Tess Brigham plans to carry—and leave behind20:35 – A gentle call to "hang tough" in a way that honors both strength and softnessReady to feel seen and understood in the messiest moments of life? Hit play and join the conversation.

What if finding your dream job actually takes a year—or even longer? In this eye-opening episode of "Gen Mess with Tess," host Tess Brigham sits down with career strategist Liz Helton to pull back the curtain on the realities of job searching and career transformation in today's ever-evolving workforce. If you've ever wondered why sending off hundreds of applications can feel like shouting into a void, this episode will reveal why—and most importantly, what you can do about it.Together, Tess Brigham and Liz Helton dig into:The shocking length of the modern job search—and why it’s no longer a "three-month process"How technology and AI have totally transformed the hiring landscape (for better and worse)Actionable strategies for networking that actually work, whether you’re an introvert, a new grad, or making a mid-career pivotThe key differences in how Gen Z, Millennials, and Gen X approach work, fulfillment, and branding themselvesWhy keeping your own “brag book” is essential for beating imposter syndrome and keeping your confidence alive amid career changesHow AI isn’t taking jobs, but people who know AI are—and how you can upskill right nowYou’ll learn practical tips for standing out in a crowded applicant pool, making LinkedIn work for you, and reframing both rejection and uncertainty as essential steps toward meaningful work. Plus, Liz Helton shares her own journey from PR exec to career consultant, and why sometimes your superpower is that thing that feels as natural as breathing.If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure about your next step—no matter your age—this heartfelt, actionable episode is for you.Episode Overview with Timestamps:[00:00:01] Introduction: Bridging generational gaps at work[00:01:16] Meet Liz Helton: From PR to guiding career transformations[00:06:44] The evolving job search: Why it takes so much longer now[00:08:47] Why everyone feels like they’re “shouting into a void”[00:13:13] How to beat interview anxiety and imposter syndrome[00:17:44] Building resilience: The emotional side of job hunting[00:19:38] Essential networking tips for introverts and extroverts alike[00:27:40] AI in the job hunt: What you need to know now[00:36:42] How Gen Z, Millennials, and Gen X view work differently[00:43:01] Liz Helton’s #1 piece of advice for anyone feeling stuck[00:46:49] Where to find Liz Helton and free career resourcesTune in to discover why you’re not alone in your career mess—and how you can thrive in it.

What if the brutal truth is that your corporate job is more likely to slowly kill you with stress than set you up for a dream retirement?In this episode of Gen Mess with Tess, host Tess Brigham sits down with powerhouse business mentor, international speaker, and award-winning author Katrena Friel for a candid and eye-opening conversation about breaking free from the golden handcuffs—and finding your true value.Katrena Friel pulls back the curtain on her own journey, from teenage jobs and personal heartbreak to a devastating $30,000 scam—a turning point that sparked her to build her own thriving training and mentoring practice. Together, she and Tess Brigham dissect why so many Gen Xers are “quietly quitting” or burning out, how younger generations are refusing to repeat the cycle of debt and overwork, and why we need to rethink the way we approach careers, money, and even family living.Key highlights include:The shocking downside of “more with less” workplace culture—and Australia’s new laws holding employers accountable for worker burnout and stressKatrena Friel’s $30,000 lesson in self-belief (and how that “scam” became the best investment of her life)The three inner compasses—mind, heart, and gut—and how to use them to turn self-doubt into an allyWhy so many “expert” coaches out there deliver nothing but an expensive lesson (and how to spot the real deal)Generational shifts: Why Gen Z is saying "no" to the boomer/American dream—and the case for embracing multi-generational homes and decluttering your life to gain headspaceBuilding your own brand: What it means to be the product, and how Katrena Friel helps you discover the million-dollar model inside your life experienceThe truth about online programs: Why up to 95% are never completed—and why transformation requires actual mentorship, not just another “passive income” promiseLoaded with tangible advice, real talk, and a bit of industry myth-busting, this episode will make you rethink everything you thought you knew about career success, purpose, and what it takes to build a legacy—on your terms.Episode Overview by Timestamp:[00:00:01] – Welcome and intro to Katrena Friel’s journey[00:02:11] – Early jobs and learning to be a self-starter[00:05:02] – Miscarriage, grief, and the life-changing $30,000 scam[00:08:17] – The unregulated coaching industry and lessons from mistakes[00:11:14] – The three inner compasses: Mind, gut, and heart[00:16:39] – Why it’s so hard to leave corporate: Golden handcuffs and generational differences[00:24:20] – Declutter your life: Practical steps for big change[00:27:28] – Rethinking the family home and intergenerational wealth[00:31:09] – The career marathon mindset and building your own expertise[00:34:09] – “Done for you” programs vs. the myth of the passive online business[00:42:59] – How to connect with Katrena Friel and next steps for listenersTune in for an episode packed with hard truths, practical strategies, and inspiration to reinvent work and life—no matter your generation!

What if the secret to building a thriving law firm wasn’t about grinding out endless billable hours—but about rethinking the entire way attorneys work and lead? In this eye-opening episode of Gen Mess With Tess, host Tess Brigham welcomes law firm growth expert Alay Yajnik for a candid conversation that shakes up everything you thought you knew about legal hustle and business success.Discover how Alay Yajnik pivoted from running multimillion-dollar Silicon Valley companies to coaching attorneys—and why most lawyers stumble when it comes to building a lasting, profitable business. You’ll learn why working harder doesn’t always mean earning more, and how breaking out of traditional law firm mindsets—from hourly billing to team management and rate setting—is the real game-changer.Key episode highlights:Why technical skills don’t equal business success (and how “The E Myth Revisited” nails the problem for lawyers, therapists, and service pros)The biggest pain points holding law firm owners back—hint: it’s not just the “hours in a day”How shifting your mindset can help you work smarter, not harder—and finally create the time and income you wantNavigating generational tensions in the workplace: What attorneys get wrong about Gen Z, and why the newest workforce expects more work-life balance and financial stability than everReal talk about raising rates, burnout, hiring, and having those difficult employee conversations (plus how to screen for clients who are truly ready for change)Whether you lead a law firm, run a small business, or just want to understand how generational perspectives are upending the way we work, this episode is loaded with actionable insights and relatable stories.Episode Overview:[00:00:31] Tess Brigham: Welcomes Alay Yajnik; his background in law firm growth[00:01:23] Alay Yajnik: Story of switching from Silicon Valley to coaching attorneys[00:03:08] Discussion: Why attorneys make great clients and what they uniquely struggle with[00:05:15] Skills gap between technical expertise and business acumen; "The E Myth Revisited"[00:07:16] The real issue: Time, burnout, and working smarter[00:09:32] Traditional law firms vs. startup mindset; resistance to change[00:12:11] Symptom vs. cure: Time management as a lever for transforming business results[00:13:19] Raising rates, money fears, and business growth challenges[00:17:27] Navigating client readiness and coaching intake[00:18:07] Generational tensions: Gen Z’s approach to work, bonuses, and raises[00:22:05] How the cost of living, technology, and burnout are shaping new workplace expectations[00:27:04] A deeper look at employee expectations, creativity, and the evolving legal workplace[00:36:33] Final reflections: Lessons from coaching lawyers, generational stereotypes, and business owner frustrations[00:41:06] How to connect withAlay Yajnik and his resources for law firm owners[00:43:17]Intro Announcer: Show outro and next episode previewTune in for an episode that’s more than just law—it’s about building the future of work, one honest conversation at a time.

What if the only way you could escape your toxic work environment was being hit by a bus—not to die, but just to get a break? Shocking as it sounds, that’s the level of desperation bestselling author and executive coach Diana Lowe once felt, and she’s not alone. In this riveting episode of "Gen Mess with Tess," Tess Brigham pulls back the curtain on the hidden emotional toll of modern workplaces and the true meaning behind being “hard to handle.”Join Tess Brigham as she sits down with Diana Lowe—author of "Hard to Handle"—for a raw, honest conversation about surviving abusive bosses, how ‘difficult’ is just a matter of perspective, and why clinical depression became a turning point for radical career reinvention. Together, they untangle how we can learn to live in the mess of work (and life) and find purpose where others might only see crisis.Key highlights include:Diana Lowe’s journey from enduring toxic workplaces in finance, to becoming a champion of emotional intelligence and intentional leadership—even when her own breaking point was a diagnosis of clinical depression.Surprising ways we internalize abusive work environments and why so many suffer in silence, secretly hoping for an unexpected event to rescue them.The real story behind "Hard to Handle": Why every villain has another side, the value of seeing the strengths in ‘difficult’ coworkers, and why we’re all someone’s ‘Chuck’ at work.Generational shifts in the workplace, from tattoos and dress codes (bras at board meetings?) to new norms around mental health—and how leaders can adapt.The truth about DEI (Diversity, Equity & Inclusion) in organizations: why emotional intelligence—self and other-awareness—is the missing foundation, and how unconscious biases persist, even with the best intentions.If you’ve ever felt misunderstood at work, frustrated with your boss, or questioned your place in the corporate ladder—this episode will not only validate your experience but give you practical wisdom on how to lead (and live) with more awareness and empathy.Episode Overview00:00:00 – Tess Brigham introduces Diana Lowe and her unconventional career path00:01:04 – Diana Lowe on surviving bad bosses and finding mission in adversity00:03:05 – Recognizing abuse and the moment depression forced a life change00:06:31 – The origins and real meaning behind “Hard to Handle”00:08:25 – Why ‘difficult’ is always in the eye of the beholder00:12:01 – The case study format of the book and lessons from corporate life00:22:18 – Growth, vulnerability, and choosing whether to stay or go in tough situations00:25:14 – Generational differences: mental health, tattoos, and the bra at work debate00:34:45 – Feedback, personal growth, and the art of building people up00:37:39 – DEI, emotional intelligence, and the nuances of real inclusion00:51:07 – How to connect with Diana Lowe and explore her upcoming projects00:53:04 – Closing thoughts: learning to live in the messDon’t miss this episode’s honest, no-fluff take on surviving—and thriving—in the workplace chaos.

What if everything we thought was “wrong” with Gen Z was actually the outcome of generations striving to do better for their children? In this solo episode of Gen Mess with Tess, host Tess Brigham turns the tables on common complaints about today’s youth and boldly reveals how every “mess” in the workplace and at home is really generational evolution in real time—and a sign of remarkable progress.Drawing deeply from her own life as a Gen Xer, therapist, and parent to a Gen Z son, Tess Brigham unpacks the hidden links between generational values, shifting parenting philosophies, and the transformation of work and life. She discusses the evolution from silent survivalists, boomers’ pursuit of success, to Gen X’s badge of independence—and how each generation has tried to heal the wounds of the last, often by swinging the pendulum in new directions.Key highlights from this episode:Why labeling Gen Z as "entitled" or "too sensitive" misses the bigger story of progressTess Brigham’s personal journey parenting a son with mental health challenges—and how it shaped her view of parenting and resilienceHow workplace frustrations with Gen Z are linked to conscious choices Gen X and Millennial parents made to create emotionally safer homesThe groundbreaking shift: Gen Z prizes wellness, therapy, and boundaries not as luxuries, but as new standardsA timely message for every parent and leader: Why the generational mess we’re in is not a mistake, but humanity learning to live, not just surviveBy the end of the episode, you’ll see generational “mess” through a new lens—one of ongoing evolution, empathy, and hope.Timestamped Episode Overview:00:00:01 – Tess Brigham sets the stage: generational challenges and introducing00:00:32 –Tess Brigham: Opening thoughts on Gen Z, the new world of work, and the evolution of values00:02:22 – The progression from the Silent Generation to Gen X: how each raised their children to break new ground00:05:21 –Tess Brighamreflects on Gen X parenting—its aspirations and overcorrections00:07:00 – Ad break:Tess Brighamdiscusses her work with organizations to “clean up the gen mess”00:07:54 – Personal story: Raising her son Max, the challenges of mental health, and questioning modern parenting00:12:06 – The new parenting paradigm: Responding to the child you have, not the one you imagined00:12:44 – The impact on the workplace: Today’s Gen Zers as products of generational evolution00:13:24 – Generational values: How priorities have shifted over time00:14:19 –Tess Brigham shares about her father’s late-in-life emotional growth and seeing progress across the generations00:15:15 – Looking at Gen Z through a lens of celebration, not criticism00:16:19 –Tess Brighamwraps up with a call to embrace the mess as part of evolution00:16:51 –O utro Voiceover: Closes with info about connecting with Tess and future resourcesReady to witness how generational messiness is actually a story of hope and healing? Press play.

What if you could overcome a lifelong fear—like a spider phobia—in under ten minutes? In this episode of "Gen Mess with Tess," host Tess Brigham sits down with Viki Johnston, founder of Accelerate and master practitioner of NLP (neuro linguistic programming), for a fascinating deep-dive into the secrets of learning, growth mindset, and generational shifts in the workplace.Viki reveals how she conquered her extreme fear of spiders on stage using powerful NLP techniques, sparking a new obsession with the method that now impacts her work coaching managers and teams for light bulb moments of transformation. Together, Tess Brigham and Viki Johnston break down why learning should be fun (not serious!), the dramatic differences NLP can make versus traditional therapy, and how “aha” moments propel people to lasting change.The episode unpacks what separates good managers from great leaders—hint: it’s more than delegation—and explores the unique challenges (and superpowers) that new Gen Z and millennial managers are bringing to today's workplace. From using AI and ChatGPT for instant answers to balancing remote work and real-life teamwork, Viki Johnston shares practical strategies for thriving across generations and cleaning up the “Gen Mess.”Tune in for relatable stories, actionable insights, and a fresh perspective on why letting go of old habits (and sometimes, just saying "I don't know") can be a game-changer for growth—at any stage of your career.Episode Highlights & Overview:[00:00:01] Intro Announcer kicks off the generational challenge theme.[00:00:31]Tess Brighamintroduces Viki Johnston and her journey from call centers to founding Accelerate.[00:03:51]Viki Johnston shares her passion for creating “light bulb moments.”[00:08:39]Tess Brigham dives into NLP and its powerful impact—like curing phobias and rewiring mindsets.[00:15:30] How NLP differs from traditional therapy (and why sometimes it’s way faster).[00:22:27] Generational dynamics in the workplace: Gen Z, millennials, and boomers.[00:26:20] The role of AI, ChatGPT, and the shift toward knowledge-sharing.[00:33:28] Good managers vs. great leaders—plus, the art of delegation and empowerment.[00:42:00] Myths and misunderstandings about Gen Z, and the key to bridging the gap.[00:44:04]Viki Johnston advocates for listening, guidance, and embracing “I don’t know.”[00:47:06] Where to find Viki and how Accelerate can support new managers.[00:48:38] How to connect with Tess and keep learning.Whether you’re a new manager, parent, or lifelong learner, this episode will help you see challenges in a whole new way—and maybe even tackle that fear you thought would last forever.

What if every time you judged a younger generation for having it "easy," you were really just grieving your own unmet dreams?In this revealing solo episode of Gen Mess with Tess, host Tess Brigham turns the generational blame game upside down, making a powerful case that beneath every eye-roll and stereotype—Boomers are out of touch, Gen Z is fragile, Millennials are entitled—there’s a shared experience of grief. From nostalgic bitterness to deep-seated anxieties, Tess explores how each generation clings to the belief that their struggles had meaning, while often resenting the freedoms and boundaries claimed by those coming after.Drawing on pop culture examples, workplace trends, and even the existential challenge of AI, Tess dissects why the world feels so tense, how each generation is coping with constant uncertainty, and what it truly means to evolve—not just as a society, but as individuals learning to let go. In a candid reflection on her own journey and those of her clients, Tess challenges listeners to see generational progress as an invitation to heal and redefine purpose, rather than a competition over who "had it worst."Tune in for thoughtful insights, practical strategies, and an honest invitation to make peace with change—because maybe the real legacy isn’t just the pain we survived, but the wisdom we share.Episode Overview & Timestamps:00:00:01 - 00:00:31 –Intro Announcer kicks off the show, teasing generational divides and introducing Tess.00:00:32 - 00:03:41 – Tess Brigham opens on the theme: every generation resents the next, touching on grief and why struggles “need to mean something.”00:03:41 - 00:06:09 – Generational stereotypes in headlines and pop culture, from Boomers to Gen Z, and the underlying grief of unmet expectations.00:06:09 - 00:09:31 – How generational pain shapes identity and workplace norms, especially around boundaries and mental health.00:09:31 - 00:11:19 – Why Gen Z’s approach isn’t laziness, but boundary literacy—and Tess explains her work helping organizations bridge generational gaps.00:11:20 - 00:14:37 – The paradox of technology, AI, and accelerating change; generational exhaustion and instability as the new normal.00:14:37 - 00:16:07 – Collective grief: safety lost, predictability gone, and the urge to “defend our pain.”00:16:07 - 00:19:39 – Tess reframes the purpose of pain: not to compete, but to transform and work together for positive change.00:19:40 - 00:21:01 – Practical advice on reconciling your own grief and embracing evolution in how you view work, mental health, and generational progress.00:21:05 - 00:21:26 –Outro Voiceover wraps up with a message to subscribe, follow Tess, and learn more.

What if the secret to surviving career chaos isn’t more hustle—but smarter engineering? In this eye-opening episode of Gen Mess with Tess, host Tess Brigham sits down with systems architect and organizational consultant Belle Walker, who reveals why most companies—and leaders—are fighting the wrong fires, and how “engineering thinking” can fundamentally change how we navigate the messiest parts of work and life.Belle shares her unusual journey from a family of engineers to stage management and humanities, and ultimately, to designing scalable, human-centered organizational systems. She explains how her approach blends classic problem-solving with deep empathy—translating abstract chaos into actionable clarity. Belle and Tess dig into why the real friction in organizations isn’t just between people, but between the functions and systems behind them, and how leaders often overlook the root causes of workplace tension.Key highlights include:Why "cleaning up the mess" starts with understanding what problems you’re actually solving (and what resources and constraints you have).The surprising pitfalls of cutting entry-level jobs for AI—and why new talent is essential for adaptability.The energy “budget” concept: how organizations and individuals ignore energy management at their peril, especially in the return-to-office push.How generational expectations shape workplace difficulties—especially for Millennials and Gen Z, and why asking for what you need isn’t entitlement.The reality behind organizational change: why progress always takes longer than it looks in books, movies, or a single sentence.Tune in to uncover actionable strategies for bridging generational gaps, managing energy, and architecting workplace solutions that really work—plus, hear Belle’s take on parenting, the myth of innate genius, and her foolproof method for separating noise from necessity.Episode Overview:00:00 – Podcast intro & meet Belle Walker: organizational chaos vs. blueprints00:04 – Belle’s origin story: engineering family, humanities leanings, Google, and finding the love of “building systems”00:10 – What is engineering thinking? Problem setup vs. pure math00:15 – Real-life chaos: Maps, autonomous vehicles, and the importance of communication00:20 – Managing today’s workplace noise & energy budgets—satellites, commutes, and training00:28 – Generational perspectives: Gen Z, Millennials ask for what they want, impacts on work culture00:34 – AI’s impact on organizational jobs—pitfalls and policy mistakes00:40 – Why leaders miss functional friction (security vs. usability, quick fixes vs. lasting change)00:44 – Change takes time—why it always feels faster in hindsight00:46 – Elder Millennials, COVID parenting, work-life transformations00:52 – How to actually “clean up” the generational mess: leverage strengths, address gaps, solve the right problems00:56 – Belle’s plug for her Friction to Function newsletter00:57 – Tess wraps up: the power of problem-solving, empathy, and learning to live in the “mess”Ready to see your workplace (and maybe your whole life) through a new lens? Hit play and join Tess and Belle as they engineer the way out of the Gen Mess!