Share

cover art for Why Friendships Fade (And How to Keep The Ones That Matter)

The Betterment Blueprint with Teshan Fernando

Why Friendships Fade (And How to Keep The Ones That Matter)

Ep. 14

In this episode of the Betterment Blueprint, Teshan Fernando dives deep into the real reason friendships fade—and what you can do to keep the ones that actually matter.


Whether you're graduating from high school or college or just navigating a season of change, this episode explores:

- Why proximity isn’t enough to sustain friendships

- The difference between friendships of convenience and intention

- How to know when to let go (and when to fight for the people who matter)

- Why personal growth can cause distance—and how to handle it with compassion


Teshan shares vulnerable stories from his own life, including:

✔️ Losing touch after high school and college

✔️ How building this podcast cost him friendships

✔️ What he’s learned about prioritizing relationships as an adult

✔️ Real conversations that saved friendships from fading away


💬 Send this to someone you care about.

📲 Take the challenge: Text or call the person who popped into your head while listening.


🎧 Subscribe for more weekly episodes that help you live with more purpose, joy, and connection.


#FriendshipAdvice #Graduation2025 #BettermanBlueprint #TeshanFernando #IntentionalLiving #PersonalGrowth #LifeCoach #PostGradLife #AdultFriendships #LettingGo



More episodes

View all episodes

  • 16. The Philosophy of Process Over Outcome

    25:30||Ep. 16
    Process Over Outcome: Helping Teens Chase Reps, Not TrophiesEvery report card, trophy, or follower count is just a price tag on the real currency: a teenager’s daily effort. In this episode, teen life-coach and high-school teacher Teshan Fernando shows parents, mentors, and educators how to spotlight the process behind every success—so teens learn to value practice, consistency, and resilience above quick wins.What You’ll HearWhy “grade worship” backfires and how to shift your praise toward effort and study habitsThe science of lagging indicators: today’s results are last year’s routines in disguiseA step-by-step framework for critiquing behavior without triggering egoPractical scripts for rewarding reps, not results, at home and on the fieldHow a process-first mindset protects teens from burnout, perfectionism, and fear of failureKey TakeawaysReward effort, not endpoints: celebrate consistent practice, honest reflection, and smart risk-taking.Model what you preach: teens copy your reaction to wins and losses more than your words.Critique the system, not the self: focus feedback on habits and strategies, never on worth or identity.Connect & Grow• Free weekly newsletter for parents: teshanfernando.com• Facebook community: Teshan Fernando Life Coaching• For coaching inquiries, email lifecoaching@teshanfernando.comKeywordsparenting teens, process over outcome, growth mindset, teenage study habits, teen resilience, coaching teens, mentorship strategies, Teshan Fernando podcast
  • 15. How to Stop Caring About What People Think (And When You Actually Should)

    38:33||Ep. 15
    Ever feel paralyzed by other people’s opinions? In this episode of The Betterment Blueprint, I’m talking about something we all deal with—judgment—and how to stop it from steering your life.I explore:Why we’re wired to care what people think (and why that’s not a flaw)How to protect your authenticity while still staying open to growthWhat to do when the people who love you fear your evolutionHow to turn criticism into data—not dramaThe key mindset shift that will free you from needing approvalI also share personal stories, examples from coaching, and practical tips for shifting your relationship with judgment so you can stay true to your path—even when it makes others uncomfortable.🎙️ This one’s for anyone who’s tired of shrinking, performing, or pretending. Let’s get real—and let’s grow.#judgment #selfawareness #selfgrowth #lifecoaching #authenticity #realtalk #mindsetshift #BettermentBlueprint #emotionalintelligence #personaldevelopment
  • 13. Anxiety Isn't Your Problem, Your Relationship With It Is

    52:32||Ep. 13
    Do you ever feel anxious and wonder if something’s wrong with you?You’re not alone—and no, you’re not broken.In this deeply personal episode, I share my lifelong journey with anxiety—from middle school discomfort to full-blown panic attacks in Mexico City—and how I finally changed my relationship with it. This isn’t about magic solutions or overnight fixes. It’s about understanding what anxiety really is, and learning to live with it instead of fight it.Whether you're a teenager trying to make sense of your emotions, or someone who's quietly struggling in silence, this episode is for you.🔍 What You’ll Learn:Why anxiety is often your brain’s way of trying to protect youHow trying to control everything is what fuels anxietyThe 4-part framework I use to manage anxiety:🧠 Mental💛 Emotional💪 Physical🤝 SocialWhat "100% Responsibility" really means—and how it gives your power backHow to talk about anxiety (even if no one around you does)🔗 Resources Mentioned:🧘‍♂️ Free Meditation Tools I Recommend:Headspace – Beginner-friendly app with a calming interfaceInsight Timer – 100% free meditations, music, and coursesUCLA Mindful Awareness Center – Research-backed mindfulness audiosSmiling Mind – Great for teens and schools📦 Breathing Practice (Box Breathing):Breathe in for 4 → Hold for 4 → Exhale for 4 → Hold for 4. Repeat for 3–5 minutes.🚶‍♂️ Simple Walks:Walking is underrated. It’s free, accessible, and wildly effective for processing emotions.🔊 Listen If You’ve Ever Thought:“I feel anxious all the time, but I don’t know why…”“I wish I could stop overthinking everything.”“I don’t want to feel like this forever.”“How do I even start talking to someone about this?”🧡 You’re Not AloneWe live in a world that tells us to keep it together. But the truth is, everyone struggles with anxiety—they’ve just gotten better at hiding it. Don’t let silence make it louder. Share this episode with someone who needs it.📲 Follow me for more real talk every week:InstagramTikTokYouTubeRate & review if this resonated with you—your feedback helps this message reach more people who need it.You got this.—Teshan
  • 12. Stop Searching For your Passion - Do This Instead

    31:03||Ep. 12
    Are you paralyzed by the fear of choosing the wrong career — or terrified that one “wrong” move could ruin your future? You’re not alone. In this episode, Coach Teshan shares the raw, real journey of how he changed career paths five times between the ages of 15 and 25 — and the five powerful lessons that finally helped him find clarity, confidence, and fulfillment.From the myth of “finding your passion,” to the truth about money, happiness, and hard work — this episode will shift the way you think about career decisions for good.Whether you're a student, a young professional, or just feeling stuck and afraid to make a move, this is the clarity you didn’t know you needed.🎯 What You’ll Learn:Why waiting for passion to strike is a trapHow to explore without fear of “wasting time”The truth about money and long-term happinessWhat makes advice actually useful (and when to ignore it)Why every path is hard — and how to choose your hard wiselyThe sunk cost fallacy and how it keeps people stuck in jobs they hate🧠 About Coach Teshan:High school teacher. Life coach. Purpose junkie. Teshan’s mission is to help young people design lives they’re actually excited to live.🎧 Keywords: career advice, purpose, life coach, self-discovery, passion vs purpose, career change, fear of failure, mindset, young adult coaching, Coach Teshan, personal growth🔍 Tags: career, passion, purpose, growth, motivation, young adults, self help, productivity, mindset, podcast
  • 11. 3 Keys to Friendship: Conflict, Vulnerability, & Honest Communication

    38:50||Ep. 11
    Ready to build rock-solid friendships without wasting time on people who don’t deserve your trust? In this episode, high school teacher and teenage life coach Teshan Fernando reveals the three foundational pillars for creating lasting bonds—plus the three common pitfalls that lead us astray. Drawing from 13 years of experience studying personal development, Teshan dives deep into topics like healthy conflict, vulnerability, and open, honest communication to help you form genuine connections that stand the test of time.You’ll hear relatable stories—like what happens when old friends travel together (and come back with fewer friendships than they started!)—and learn how avoiding conflict can do more damage than facing it head-on. Teshan also shares personal insights on dropping the mask and taking those first steps toward real, authentic friendships. Whether you’re a teen looking for real talk or simply want to level up your relationship game, this episode has the practical tips (and cautionary tales) you need.Tune in now for actionable strategies you can use today—like Teshan’s “FAST” method for speaking your mind—and discover how being honest (and sometimes a little uncomfortable) ultimately leads to deeper trust and happier connections. If you’re done settling for shallow relationships, this conversation might just change the way you approach every friendship in your life.Listen in and learn how to:Embrace conflict as a key to stronger bondsOvercome fear by showing real vulnerabilityUse straightforward communication to build unshakable trustDon’t forget to subscribe, like, and share your own insights in the comments. Let’s make building meaningful friendships the norm, one authentic conversation at a time!
  • 10. Beyond Situationships—Rewriting Your Relationship Playbook

    01:02:57||Ep. 10
    In this raw and relatable episode, we break down why so many of us settle for “meh” when it comes to romance—and how to finally cut the cord on toxic patterns. From the highs and lows of teenage flings to navigating the dreaded “situationship,” we uncover the four walls (and the roof!) of building a solid partnership. If you’re sick of heartbreak, half-baked commitments, or just plain nonsense, tune in for a no-BS guide on how to craft a relationship worth keeping. Bring your pen and paper, because we’re talking actionable tips, mindset shifts, and one epic fishing analogy you won’t forget.
  • 9. The Power of Self-Education (Because School Doesn’t Teach You Everything)

    38:16||Ep. 9
    Ever feel like traditional schooling left you with more “fill-in-the-bubble” skills than actual life know-how? In this episode, I break down why your self-education matters more than any pop quiz you’ve taken. We’ll talk about:The Reality Check: Why public school (yes, even though I’m a teacher) isn’t always enough.Learning Humps & Mountains: Moving from clueless enthusiasm to “Oh no, this is harder than I thought” and finally reaching “Hey, I’ve got this!”Kung Fu Panda Wisdom: How doing only what you already can keeps you stuck exactly where you are.Everyday ‘Dead Time’: Turn commute or chore time into your personal study hall—with podcasts, audiobooks, or even YouTube.Chasing Curiosity: Whether it’s politics, World War II, or personal finance, there’s a rabbit hole (or a ChatGPT-made curriculum) out there with your name on it.If you’re tired of feeling stuck, discover how to keep learning—on your own terms—and why a little discomfort just means you’re finally leveling up. Tune in for practical tips, real talk, and a nudge to go learn something that actually matters to you. Enjoy the climb!
  • 8. Ambition: How I Lost—and Reclaimed—My Dream Life

    53:25||Ep. 8
    What happens when ambition fades? How do you reclaim your drive after losing sight of your goals?In this episode of Betterment Blueprint, I dive deep into my personal journey with ambition—how I first discovered it, how I lost it, and what it took to rebuild it. From the pressure to follow the “right” path to the realization that ambition without balance leads to burnout, I share insights on how to cultivate healthy, sustainable ambition without sacrificing fulfillment.In this episode, we cover:✔️ The power of ambition—and why it often fades over time✔️ How fear and societal expectations bury our natural drive✔️ Why ambition alone isn’t enough (and what to focus on instead)✔️ How to reignite your ambition and stay motivated long-term✔️ The dark side of ambition—and how to avoid chasing goals that don’t serve youThis episode isn’t just about setting goals—it’s about making sure your ambition is aligned with the life you actually want to live.🎙️ Tune in now and let’s talk about reclaiming ambition in a way that fuels your growth—without draining your happiness.