Share

Sex, Love & Elephants with Dr. Cheryl


Latest episode

  • 136. Suffering Is a Choice You Make: A Dharma Talk with Dr. Cheryl

    01:08:48
    We all have moments of unkindness that come at times of weakness. Your shoelace broke, you stepped in a puddle, and you got a flat tire—so you take it all out on your local barista. But here’s the thing:  It's up to us whether we have a good day or a bad day. It’s up to us whether, regardless of circumstances, we have a kind mind or a mean mind. It's up to us how we feel when the circumstances get in our way. Fix yourself a nice cup of steaming tea, find a quiet, tranquil spot, and settle in—this episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants is your ticket to my latest Dharma Talk. Tune in and learn about the Eightfold Path and why this central piece of the Buddhist belief system remains so incredibly relevant in our modern daily lives. In This Episode, You Will Learn:Suffering is not inherent in change, suffering is inherent in us wanting things to be different (02:46)When I act kinder, I feel better (17:21)We have to practice right speech in the world with our words—and when we fail, begin again (34:21)Abstain from slanderous speech: Don't gossip, don't talk about other people in ways that may not be skillful (36:57)Communicating is listening as much or more than you speak (38:12)It's not an easy being a kind, compassionate human being… but it's huge return on investment (01:06:37)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.comWant to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram Let’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz

More episodes

View all episodes

  • 135. Are You Secretive or Just Private? Your Relationship Could Depend on the Difference

    23:01
    Once you’ve been in a relationship for long enough, you might feel like you know every tiny detail about your partner. How they take their coffee and how they like their eggs cooked, their biggest childhood fear, and even that special drink they love— and how it makes them snore like a banshee. But let me tell you sweethearts, we do NOT know everything about our partners. It's impossible… And frankly, it’s pretty lazy to even imagine that we do!In today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I'm talking about the difference between secrecy and privacy in your relationship—and maybe in your own heart and mind.Tune in and learn why you shouldn’t tell your partner everything… and the BIG difference between privacy and secrecy.In This Episode, You Will Learn:One of the predictors of a deep, meaningful relationship is the ability to have deep, meaningful conversations (02:32)Secrecy is when you keep information from your partner that could affect them in a negative way (07:26)Trust betrayal is as significant as an emotional or sexual liaison outside of your primary relationship (13:39)There's no one rule for where your privacy fence is (14:36)If you're holding information that has a big impact on your partner, they have the right to know—figure out how to tell them (20:06)This week’s LoveByte (21:36)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.comWant to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram Let’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz
  • 134. Hungry Ghosts, Greedy Demons & Monstrous Mindstates: A Halloween Dharma Talk with Dr. Cheryl

    48:32
    October 31 is a bit of a funny day. Of course, for many of us in Canada and the States, we have our long held Halloween traditions from childhood. But if we think of those traditions, there are several of them—including the act of assuming another persona—that correspond to aspects of Buddha Dharma.In today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you’ve got a front row seat to my recent Dharma Talk, given this past Halloween.Tune in and learn about the ghosts, ghouls, and goblins that reside inside of our own psyche when we get trapped in anger, selfishness, or judgment.In This Episode, You Will Learn:According to Buddha Dharma, there is no real, permanent self (04:13)About 30% of humans across the spectrum suffer from abandonment issues (11:36)When we're in greed, we forget to be generous (16:11)Halloween is the only holiday where the purpose is to give freely, without discrimination, to strangers (23:08)Everything changes, everything dies (29:53)This week’s LoveByte (47:09)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.comWant to learn more about Buddhism and relationships? Cheryl’s book Buddha’s Bedroom is a great resource!Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram Let’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz
  • 133. Connecting Deeper: A Conversation with Dr. Cheryl & Marital Therapist Andrew G. Marshall

    47:50
    Would you rather be right? Or would you rather be happy? It's hardly an original thought... but it might be just the question that you and your honey need to be asking yourselves—especially if you find yourself in the same argument day in, day out.In today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, you’ll have a front row seat to my conversation Andrew G. Marshall, renowned marital therapist and host of The Meaningful Life podcast. Join Andrew and me as we talk about the real life relationships issues we’ve encountered in our practices and even some of the strife we’ve had with our own sweethearts. Missed out on Become Passion sign-ups? There’s still time! Send an email to support@DrCherylFraser.com and let us know you want to join!In This Episode, You Will Learn:The fight is never just about the topic at hand (03:14)Ask yourself: Would you rather be right? Or would you rather be happy? (07:11)Nothing has ever been settled by deciding “I'm right and you're wrong” (09:15)People don't like conflict and they’ll try and get it over and done with as quickly as possible (18:00)In relationships, unfinished business accumulates (20:31)Don’t wait until your relationship is on life support to seek therapy—go now! (24:02)As our relationship matures, we need to give ourselves time to move from the sensual zone into the sexual zone (31:01)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.com.Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram Connect with Andrew:WebsiteThe Meaningful Life podcastLet’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz
  • 132. Listen to Real Couples Tell Their Stories - Become Passion Program Doors Are OPEN

    34:45
    The doors to Become Passion are OPEN—make sure you and your sweetheart are signed up before they close on November 2!https://drcherylfraser.mykajabi.com/join-become-passionJoin me this Wednesday, November 1 for a very special LIVE Q&A over Zoom. Email support@drcherylfraser.com for the special link!This October on Sex, Love, and Elephants, I take you behind the scenes as I talk with some of my Become Passion students about their relationship struggles and how they overcame… Today, I’m joined by six REAL couples who have participated in my Become Passion training. Are you ready to create love and passion that last a lifetime? At the end of this month I'm opening the doors for the only time this year to Become Passion. Join the waitlist and hear more about the program! This twelve-week immersion couples program with me, Dr. Cheryl, starts November 3.A failing relationship doesn’t always look like explosive fights and shouting matches and slamming doors… it can just as easily look like apathy and boredom and quiet resentment. What matters most is how you chose to bring those issues into the light—and whether or not you’re willing to fight to make things better. In This Episode, You Will Learn:This Wednesday’s LIVE Q&A is your last chance to join me for a free event before we kick off Become Passion (01:20)Karen and Steve didn’t have nasty fights, but they were struggling with their sexuality as they aged (03:57)Between kids, careers, and household responsibility, it’s so easy for a relationship to become Marriage Incorporated (07:30)Lisa and Cam found themselves in flooded arguments that became destructive to their relationship (18:22)Howard and Karen were separated for 6 months before they found Become Passion and learned how to fall in love all over again (22:29)Today’s LoveByte (33:00)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.com.Follow  @drcherylfraser on InstagramLet’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz
  • Spend 3 Months with Cheryl Renovating Your Relationship—Welcome to the Passion Masterclass!

    01:36:03
    In today’s episode of Sex, Love, and Elephants, I’m going to give you a look inside my Passion Masterclass - a FREE couples workshop I do ONCE  a year. It’s packed with information about the 3 Keys to Passion and much more. I also give you the opportunity to take the next steps in your relationship journey with me as your guide and romance cheerleader! (Yes, you can be both a hopeless romantic and a scientist—fun combination.)Here’s the good news: You are NOT alone and it's NOT too late… even if it feels like it! In fact, on average, over 30% of the long-term couples I see in my practice aren’t having any sex whatsoever. In this exclusive LIVE Passion Masterclass, you’ll learn about Passion and how you can shift your relationship from where it is to where you want it to be. You’ll learn that extraordinary Lifelong Passion is 100% Possible, but you must beware of Marriage Inc. (AKA running your relationship like a business). You’ll also learn how to create much more intimacy, thrill, and sensuality—no matter where your relationship is currently. Intrigued? Be one of the few select couples who join me inside the Become Passion – Create Love that Lasts a Lifetime 12-week online immersion program for couples. To learn more and to join, click here! We begin November 3, 2023 and go through January 26, 2024.Want to watch the actual masterclass with video? Click here!In This Episode, You Will Learn:The 3 Keys to Passion – What they are, and Why mastering them will help you cultivate great love and sex that last a lifetime Intimacy: “Marital Friendship”  Why Learning to Fight Fair is so important. Painful repeating arguments Thrill: Why it is so difficult to keep the excitement, attraction, and romance going – and what you need to do about it. Getting realSensuality: How to wake up your erotic life. Did you know most long-term couples make love only a few times a month? Want to learn more about Buddhism and Love relationships? Check out my book Buddha’s Bedroom Got a question or topic you’d like me to cover in an upcoming episode? Email me at hello@drcherylfraser.comLet’s Connect!About MeWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz
  • 131. Break Your Painful Relationship Patterns & Reignite the Spark—It’s NOT Too Late

    26:02
    JOIN my FREE Passion masterclass—just choose the date and time that work best for you. This is the only time this year it’s being taught!This October on Sex, Love, and Elephants, I take you behind the scenes as I talk with some of my Become Passion students about their relationship struggles and how they overcame… Today, I’m answering some of the most common questions and most pressing pain points from my past Become Passion sessions. These issues came from REAL couples with REAL problems—just like you and your honey.Are you ready to create love and passion that last a lifetime? At the end of this month I'm opening the doors for the only time this year to Become Passion. Join the waitlist and hear more about the program! This twelve-week immersion couples program with me, Dr. Cheryl, starts November 3.When you and your sweetheart first got together, what did you do to really romance one another? I’d guess it didn’t involve the couch, Netflix, and a bag of potato chips on a Saturday night… So why expect that spark to continue burning when you’re not doing anything to feed the passion flame? When you become lazy in love, love suffers. In This Episode, You Will Learn:You and your partner can join me for  FREE Passion masterclass and see how the Become Passion program can reignite your love life and bring back the spark you’ve been missing (00:23)¾ of couples are stuck in a vicious cycle of the same perpetual argument (05:44)Don’t get lazy and complacent in your love—romance your partner like you did in the beginning (11:03)If your sex life is floundering—You. Are. Normal… But it doesn’t have to be that way (16:20)Today’s LoveByte (23:00)Got questions? Email hello@drcherylfraser.com.Follow  @drcherylfraser on Instagram Let’s Connect!  About MeInstagramWebsite - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here Facebook Page  YoutubeIf you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz