Pushing Past Polite

Season 4 starts now! Keith joins Laura and Kori to touch base mid-summer because Lord, y’all - so much is happening!  The three discuss the tension of living our individual lives with its daily rhythms, routines, and pressing “must dos” while acknowledging the big picture things happening in our world that we just cannot ignore! And boy oh boy are we tired of living in unprecedented times! Poor elder millennials - it’s all we know.Big macro forces include the ongoing genocide in Gaza, a shooting at a presidential campaign rally, famine in Sudan and DRC, exploitative mining practices in Congo, inflation, violations of the separation of church and state in Louisiana classrooms, dangerous and crazy Supreme Court decisions about homelessness, bribery, and presidential immunity, AIPAC bragging about influencing our elections, a felon leading the presidential race, Nazis marching in Nashville. Yet we have to pack for vacations, drive kids to camps, and make dinner.  Gah!We reflect on the events of recent weeks and have some takeaways.Americans consume violence as our entertainment - from the NFL to the Law and Order series to true crime podcasts. So why are we surprised when we see political violence? Violence is woven into the fabric of our nation’s history - particularly violence against native peoples and Africans captured and forced into slavery. And it only continued - see Tulsa Race Massacre - and even school shootings. Assassinations aren’t even new - see Lincoln, JFK, MLK. Yes we condemn violence, but let’s be clear - this is not new.Kori shares a terrifying, poignant memory of being a 10 year old girl in the backseat of her parents’ vehicle as the police pulled them over with SWAT and helicopters, assuming the car was stolen. Perhaps the shock is just new to white Americans?More than ever - community is everything - practically and strategically. Check on and take care of your people. Flex your empathy muscles. Don’t feel guilty about self-care. Remember - you’re putting out brush fires in your own life while a forest fire rages all around. Finding joy and healing spaces is critical. And even if you have the privilege to ignore what’s going on in the world - fight that urge.  Don’t be a rugged individualist. Lean in and recognize the power of the collective. And if you haven’t read about Project 2025, the time is now. So much dangerous wild stuff - from women’s rights to weather reports! Get educated about the stakes and talk about them with your people.And lighter topics of conversation include The Price is Right and how Bob Barker is better than Drew Carey as host. Streaming services with ads are making us cranky. Wasn’t the point of streaming to skip ads on cable? And all the categories of exercise classes in these handy dandy apps, The Outer Banks on Netflix, school supply shopping with a bajillion glue sticks, crazy school calendars, our vacation plans.Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.The best ways to support us are by rating, reviewing, and sharing episodes with folks in your circle.

Episode 25 continues the conversation from Episode 24, focused on sharing the characteristics of White Supremacy Culture (WSC). We review the 15 characteristics from Tema Okun’s seminal work and then continue to unpack ways in which we see WSC in ourselves, in our society, and institutions. Examples include the prevalence of white men in positions of power in our workplaces. Laura shares her relationship with perfectionism and worship of the written word, and Kori confesses how a sense of urgency and defensiveness is something she has to actively note and work to disrupt. We both acknowledge the importance of self-talk as a strategy to work through moments where we see WSC in ourselves. We point out how most Americans fear open conflict, preferring instead to sweep problems out of sight to protect comfort. Our personal chat to wrap things up includes Kori’s annual crawfish boil, the Cowboy Carter album, the purchase of a moonbounce, how much her boys love travel, and potty training. Laura shares the plan for a fun summer full of swim team practices and even a week of sleep away camp - and the ladies sign off Season 3 with warm wishes for our listeners to enjoy wonderful time with their loved ones over our break. We’ll be back for Season 4 with some surprises, including more friends for you to meet!!Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com for full show notes, transcripts, links to resources, and discussion prompts. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.

Episode 24 begins with misheard lyrics from a Jay Z and Alicia Keys song (thanks Popcast podcast). It makes no sense and isn’t appropriate for all audiences but you can’t unhear it. Kori asks if Laura’s heard Beyonce’s new Cowboy Carter album and phew! Has she ever! The backlash against Beyonce was the PERFECT segue into our topic for this pod - and next pod as we talked for a long time. Drum roll please! White. Supremacy. Culture. Kori grounds us in understanding culture in general, and then Laura shares the 15 characteristics of white supremacy culture from a seminal article by Dr. Tema Okun. They are: perfectionism, a sense of urgency, defensiveness, valuing quantity over quality, worship of the written word, only one right way, paternalism, either/or thinking, power hoarding, fear of open conflict, individualism, I'm the only one, progress is bigger and more, illusion of objectivity, and the right to comfort. Phew! Next, we trace evidence of white supremacy through country music, language in job descriptions, headlines about the impact of the eclipse on lost wages (WTH!), how one of our kiddos pretend works to avoid his sibling, and the unreasonable expectation of strong performance on evaluations. Kori, in a recent speaking engagement, was asked by a listener how to push back against perfectionism in herself and begin to unlearn it. We also address discomfort as not being the same as being in danger - and that’s where we leave off this time - thanking listeners for embracing elements of the pod that might have made them uncomfortable or defensive - and hopefully pushing past politeness to interrogate why so we can all root out white supremacy culture - in our society, but first in our own thinking.Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com for full show notes, transcripts, links to resources, and discussion prompts. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube. 

Episode 23 begins with a raunchy smell and a diaper change. Aren’t you glad this is a strictly audio medium and not smell-o-vision? Like the poop in Kori’s son’s diaper, we discuss the less-than-fragrant choices at the top of the ticket this November. That said, Laura is encouraged by the ever-so-slight, but significant movement she’s seen among U.S. leaders on Gaza. We have more power than we realize! Influencing the algorithm, having courageous conversations, voting uncommitted - it’s sending a message loud and clear! Laura brings up the concept of the Overton Window and how it shifts over time due to social forces. Kori shares how the war on Gaza is illuminating colonial power and oppression all over the globe in new and powerful ways for people. More and more folks are realizing the connectedness in these issues - and how our liberation is tied to the liberation of everyone around the world. Keith reminds us about the stark nature of our choices at the top of the ticket - and how tr*mp would be worse for the Palestinians - and women, and people of color, and democracy, and and and. Kori reminds us about the importance of every elected office - up and down the ballot - and not to get overly fixated or frustrated by just the presidency.  The House and Senate control the budget priorities. The Senate confirms judges and cabinet members. Heck, local school boards are deciding what books your children can read! Remember, if your vote didn’t matter, folks with power wouldn’t work so hard to disenfranchise others. Laura confesses her naivety, years ago, when she thought Republicans would play by the rules and the party would lose the majority and therefore the power, ushering in a new era of more progressive thinking.  Ha! Isn’t she precious?  People of color have long known that systems are erected purposely to keep power and create “others.” Evil shapeshifts. While we believe the Democratic party is more likely to listen to the needs of the people out here, Kori wants to hear more of a positive vision for the future from leaders. Not just - “at least we’re not as bad as the other guy.” I mean if only leaders could get as excited and work together for health care as they do about banning Tik Tok… Just saying! Laura just has to sneak in some Kate Middleton talk, and while we wish her well as she focuses on her health, how does the monarchy make sense anymore?? Get yourself out of this messed up family! There is nothing special about your bloodline.  You are stuck in a gilded cage so citizens can gawk at you.  Blech!  That said, I’m sure a presidential challenger wouldn’t mind setting up his dynasty here in the U.S. so we have to be vigilant, use our voices, and push for representation that values humanity!Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com for full show notes, transcripts, links to resources, and discussion prompts. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.

Episode 22 starts out with Laura getting a little picked on for quirks she didn’t know she had - ha! Today, the three musketeers (yes, Keith too) talk about their “sacred texts” - art that they come back to over and over again - movies, TV shows, quotes, books, music. You name it! We use this conversation as a way to better understand each other as friends - and reflect on the power of art to connect, communicate, and inspire. The soul of art speaks to us and changes us - no wonder censorship is a thing. Art can change the world!Here are some highlights. Can you guess who liked what? Eddie Murphy’s stand up and movies, Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Sex in the City, Father of the Bride, Princess Bride, Lost, A Different World, the whole TGIF lineup (Family Matters, Dinosaurs), Golden Girls, Six Feet Under, The West Wing, House of Card (we all agree - ick), Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo Friere, Rainer Maria Rilke’s quote about questions, The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen, vampire books by Melissa de la Cruz, The Last Airbender, Billy Joel, Bruce Springsteen, Phil Collins, Don Henley, Mumford and Sons, Sia, Fiona Apple, Alanis, Nirvana, Counting Crows, Sublime, Dave Matthews, The Cosby Show, Prince, the Eagles, Michael Jackson and more.Laura introduces the term “Facebook know,” Keith shares a disturbing prediction from tech giants on the future of AI in publishing, Kori can’t help but nerd out with a conversation on Optimus Prime, and then guess who brings up Love is Blind Season 6 chatter? Clay’s mom is a shero, but also let that woman not have to work so hard to fix the men in her life.Y’all - we wrap things up by saying art helps us connect with our own humanity - and lord knows we need to connect with our humanity now more than ever! So share this pod with your folks, ask about what texts are sacred to them, and share yours back!Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube. What are YOUR sacred texts? Let us know!

No small talk today. Laura and Kori begin the episode by commenting on Nazis marching down the streets of Nashville during Black History Month. Kori apologizes for her female-version of a Barry White voice after conducting trainings all week. Laura admits her naivety about how XYZ bad thing couldn’t happen here in the U.S. because of our founding principles, realizing how vulnerable our democracy is, citing the Alabama Supreme Court ruling, abortion penalties in Texas, a bill in West Virginia aimed at charging librarians with crimes, gerrymandering, voter suppression, and the electoral choice between a fascist dictator and an incumbent president facilitating genocide. Kori and Laura point out that those in power are doing all they can to keep power - using the example of billionaires evading taxation. Y’all, we just go through it all - the Citizens United case, the health care system, college debt, the cost of childcare, the professional penalty for mothers who opt out of the workforce. Phew! This all sets the backdrop for today’s main topic of conversation - our mutual musings about raising our kids abroad. Did you know the U.S. ranks #24 on family-friendliness by the U.S. News and World Report? Kori and Laura have done different levels of thinking about this scenario seriously - and we talk through some of what factors into this - including racial identity (and racial ambiguity for Kori’s husband) and interest in cultural and language immersion. Because multilingualism is a superpower - it’s real wealth! We both agree that having child care, health care, and community built into our lives would be well worth the trade off of potentially higher taxation. We also raise our different life experiences relative to geographic mobility. Kori, in her childhood and adulthood, has made several big, brave moves.  Laura’s family made one big brave move and it was a questionably successful choice for the first decade at least. Not surprising that Laura’s much less likely to make a big move - plus folks are mostly nice (admittedly - to white folx like her) and dang it - she just renovated her kitchen! Itty bitty Kori reveals that she played basketball before her track star days. She was a regular Mugsy Bogues! Anyway, we are just tired of capitalism, y’all. And the food is killing us here too. So we start brainstorming how this could look - including small next steps like getting kid passports and trying to travel for longer chunks of time. And we can’t help it but quote Aunt Tula in Big Fat Greek Wedding and share a few kid stories before we wrap. Also, Laura is always open to chatting Love is Blind, since Kori clearly isn’t that friend. 😛Visit our new home on the web for links and resources: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.

There are more than a few interjections of cute kiddo voices this episode, friends - including a baby voice flashback. Brace yourself for cuteness! In Episode 20, Kori, Laura, and Keith reflect on pivotal mentors in their lives - from academic influences to professionals who championed them to friends who’ve helped them through tough stages. You’ll meet Kori’s grandma (yes the fat phobic one); former teachers Ms. Fisher and Miss Milleris, and Mr. Williams; Professor Hirsch and Father Kemp, colleagues Elaine Mulligan, Vanessa Coleman, and Beverly Brooks; auntie sister cousin Pam; and mama/friend mentors Jaunelle, Lanaya, her sister, Christian, Tyranny, Camila, Randy. Laura introduces you to Dr. Schleef, Dr. Linda Underwood, Dr. Jonas, and Dr. Allan, and Keith tells the story of how Jimmy Rose and Tim Burke changed his life and his path in dramatic fashion. Beyond mentorship, you’ll hear us mention how Kori’s son uses chapstick, Laura’s husband’s teary takeaway from Episode 19, and a shoutout to the Buddy Hollies trivia team in St. Petersburg, Florida for last week’s win. Laura and Kori are tempted to snowbird at Keith’s place when he describes the plethora of dog friendly bars with mini golf courses in his city. We’ll close out the episode with more kid cuteness - and a new acronym: DAFBFF! What can we say - IYKYK, and if you don’t know, listen and find out. Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube. Why not send this to a mentor or mentee of yours and let them know how much you appreciate them?

Y’all - as promised - we got our moderate amount of Keith! Whoop whoop! After sharing plans for an upcoming Chuck E. Cheese birthday party, Kori, Laura, and Keith interrogate sh*t they used to believe and ways they’ve evolved over time. Topics discussed include hell, organized religion, proselytizing, marriage equality, abortion rhetoric, fat shaming and the Body Mass Index (BMI), therapy, expiration dates on friendships, having friendships outside of your romantic partner, dress codes and what is deemed “appropriate” dress. Phew! That’s a lot of unlearning. We also discuss the relief that comes from canceling or postponing social engagements - often on account of kids, 90s musical hits about butts, Keith’s trivia team and playing beach volleyball and how all the ladies are going to get a treat down St. Petersburg way. We likened his potential groupies to Billy Bob Thornton in Bad Santa and the office ladies watching the Diet Coke delivery guy arrive. Because we’re complex humans, we also bring up literature from Ralph Waldo Emerson and Michelle Obama - and we announce that for our first podcast-a-versary, we gifted ourselves a NEW WEBSIIIIITE!!! Did I mention we got a website?!?! Visit our new home on the web: www.pushingpastpolitepodcast.com for resources by episode. Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube. We are honored by every listen, review, and share. 

Kori and Laura recorded this season opener in the same physical room. Can you believe it?? Speaking of physicals, the gals delve into their experiences and best practices in preparing to see their doctors. They are grateful to have practitioners whom they trust, but also emphasize the importance of self-advocacy in medical decisions. Kori tells the story of food allergies, discovering a pain in her ass, and an amazing sports medicine doctor.  Laura shares how her doctor discovered she had thyroid cancer from exercising an abundance of caution and reveals all the other well checks she went through afterwards to make sure she was all clear. We touch on college health centers, how Laura’s pediatrician set her up on a babysitting date, assumptions about what a healthy body looks like, how the BMI is B.S., and how Kori’s dad leverages his identities to connect with skeptical patients. Most importantly, we challenge the notion that health care has to be a commodity like it is in these here United States - and we address the history of injustice against Black and Brown bodies by medical researchers - and ongoing medical injustice from access to outcomes.Follow us on social media, as we want to hear from YOU! @pushingpastpolite on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.We would very much appreciate you rating and reviewing the show anywhere you get your podcasts - and sharing is caring!