Plumbing the Death Star

In an episode where they've never needed his bullshit X-Men knowledge more, Zammit's out sick. But never fear true believer as he's been replaced by our good friend Darcy Smith from Studio Folly! Who knows NOTHING about X-Men. He didn't even know Wolverine aka Logan aka James Howlett bones were coated in adamantium. You all better come for him in the comments. They didn't even mention the time after Wolverine got the adamantium ripped from his bones where he turned into a full on cave man, wore a bandana and had no nose. Nor do the mention the time of how he got his adamantium back. You see, at the time, and unbeknownst to the rest of the X-Men, Apocalypse had kidnapped (man-napped? mutant-napped?) Wolverine and pitted him up against Sabretooth (who had been enhanced with adamantium from the arms of the evil mutant Cyber (he had arms coated in adamantium)) to see who would become Death (one of the Horsemen of Apocalypse). Wolverine defeated Sabretooth believing that only bad would come out of Sabretooth becoming Death and so Apocalypse sucked off the adamantium from Sabretooth to give to Wolverine. Even his teeth were adamantium at this point, but that didn't last. He was then made to attack the X-Men and he was all wrapped up in a red headscarf thing and wielded a big scimitar for reasons that are unclear. Probably to hide the fact that no one was supposed to know he was Wolverine as there was another Wolverine on the team, but not like his clone or his son or his clone of a clone, this one was a Skrull (one of those shapeshifting aliens) who was pretending to be Wolverine for some reason that escapes me. Did Apocalypse put him on the team or was that just a sweet coincidence? This was during Apocalypse: The Twelve storyline, which was something that was teased for so long in the comics but ended up being just a terrible mess where Apocalypse wanted to get sucked off into the body of Nate Grey (an alternate reality and all powerful son of Jean Grey and Scott Summers who was kicking it sweet in the 616 universe who later went on to become a mutant shaman, then become a bit of everyone, then he made an alternate reality where sex was forbidden which makes sense as he was tricked by an evil Madelyne Pryor from a different alternate dimension to have sex, which is weird as Madelyne is a clone of Jean Grey, his mum) but Scott Summers pushed him out the way and took his spot, so Apocalypse ended up sucking off Cyclops and then they merged into one guy and then choofed off for a bit to finally come back to cheat on his wife. So you guys better come for them in the comments. Didn't even know their plane was called the Blackbird. IDIOTS.

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