SexTok with Zibby and Tracey

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) My question is about ‘face sitting’. My husband has asked me to try this with him, which I'm more than happy to do. But would like to know a bit more about it—especially because I'm a bigger girl and don't want to hurt him. 2) My girlfriend doesn’t love giving BJs, but will do so on occasion. If she doesn’t enjoy them, it’s not fun for either of us, and if that’s the case, that’s just the way it is. But do you have any tips on getting her to enjoy them that might make a difference?3) My husband loves positions where he can penetrate deep inside me, but sometimes that’s painful for me. Is there anything we can do to stop it from hurting, but still make it fun for him?To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) I didn’t start having good sex until my early 30s, and within a few months of dating I started squirting. Now, it’s a ridiculous amount. I can’t have sex anywhere except on a waterproof mattress cover or blanket. Sometimes just kissing my partner makes me gush slightly which can be uncomfortable if I can’t immediately change underwear. We were hooking up in the kitchen the other day and I made a decent size puddle on the floor. Is there a way to lessen the amount of gushing or turn it off? 2) On Valentine’s Day, I gave my wife a gift—a clitoral suction toy. She enjoyed it so much that every time we have sex, she uses it. At first, I enjoyed it too (and my hands didn’t get as tired), but now I’m starting to worry. Will I become less attractive to her? Will we ever have sex without toys? Is sex with me boring or not as pleasurable? How should I deal with this?3) I’m a married man in a loving relationship and enjoying great sex with my wife. Over time, I’ve realized that I’m also attracted to men, though I’ve never fallen in love with one. I’ve been exploring my sexuality privately, but I’m unsure how to navigate this while being committed to my marriage. I’m still very attracted to my wife and don’t want to lie to her, but I also want to keep our marriage alive. Do you know anyone else who has been in a similar situation? How did they approach it, and what advice do you have for exploring bisexuality in a way that respects your partner and relationship?To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) My wife and I, both in our late 30s, have always enjoyed an adventurous sex life. She’s always watched porn, which leaves me cold but never bothered me. But now she wants to watch it together. I really don’t want to, and it’s causing arguments. She thinks I’m ‘weird’ and says I’m probably the only man in the world who would say no to this request.2) I’m really into having my nipples bitten HARD, but find men are nervous about doing this. How can I convince them it doesn’t hurt me? It’s the one sure way to push myself into orgasm if I’m having problems getting there. 3) I want to ask my new girlfriend to give me an orgasm via prostate massage using a sex toy or her finger. A previous partner did this, and it was the most intense, deep orgasm I have ever experienced. I’m nervous to suggest it in case she thinks it’s dirty. When should I bring it up and how?To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) I’ve been listening to your podcast since the beginning and my question is similar to other male listeners: I'm 51, my wife is 55, and we’ve been married for 20 years. We have four kids in their older teens. Our sex life has been virtually non-existent for at least six years, and we have had no sex at all in the last year. We don't even sleep in same bed anymore. We tried therapy and that didn't work. My wife suffers from migraines and insomnia. I try to be empathetic, but I'm getting frustrated. Time is running out for us and I don't want to be in a sexless marriage for the rest of our lives. I love my wife and our family, but I’m a virile man. What can I do?2) What’s the etiquette when you surprise your partner as they are masturbating? This happened to me last week. Do you creep out hoping they didn’t see you (sadly they did)? Do you apologize briefly and leave them to it? If you do, what do you say when you see them next? Acknowledge the act or simply make no comment at all? Do you offer a hand or join in? I was utterly lost for words. We both masturbate on our own every now and then, but have never come across the other in the act itself. I’d be so interested to get your take.3) What do you do if you’re on the verge on an orgasm but can’t seem to get over the hump? I’m a 26-year-old straight woman.To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) My girlfriend’s idea of perfect sex is both of us having orgasms as quickly as possible. Skip the foreplay, get naked, apply the lube, and get straight into intercourse. My idea of perfect sex is a bit of flirting, undressing each other, making her climax a few times during foreplay, then penetration in as many different positions as we can manage until we’re both fully satisfied. Any suggestions for some sort of compromise?2) My friend is Indian and had an arranged marriage. She was a virgin at 34 when she got married, even though she’s sexually educated and masturbates. I was dreading the worst, but her marriage is happier—sexually and relationship-wise—than any other marriage in our friend group. Is there any evidence that having lots of casual sex doesn’t necessarily make you happier long-term?3) My husband and I are in our 40s and have been married 20 years. We’re madly in love and still have sex at least three times a week. My husband has a VERY high sex drive and this is the compromise we have settled on because more than three times is too much for me and less for him is unthinkable. We have three kids, I work a high-pressure job, and I do the kids' and home responsibilities. I think he should look after himself by masturbating, but he can't masturbate to completion. He says it's a psychological thing: it makes him feel unloved, unwanted, and unattractive. I'm so tired of this being a strain on our marriage. I’ve suggested therapy, but he says he can't talk about such sensitive stuff with a stranger.To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions:1) After years of having really good sex, my partner is now avoiding it. He’s 48. You always say if a man over 40 suddenly goes off sex, he’s having erection problems. I think you’re right because the last few times we did attempt sex, he couldn’t get hard. The thing is, we’re good at having sex, but not so good at talking about it. I have no idea of how to address the issue. Can you help?2) Our sex life is good, but we only ever do it doggy style or missionary. To be honest, we were quite happy with just doing those positions because the relationship was new. Now, we're two years in and we're thinking we should try something new. We're not interested in difficult, show-off positions like up against a wall, so keep it simple please!3) I’m a 34-year-old straight guy and in a relationship that I’d describe as 'okay.' I’ve been with my girlfriend for three years. Sometimes, we have a great time together and I think how much I love her. But when we argue—which is often—it feels very much like I should end it. I’ve been wrestling with this stay or leave decision for about a year now. Any clues to help me decide?To have Tracey and Kelsey discuss YOUR secret sex question, enter it anonymously at https://bit.ly/3C4AelUWant a copy of Tracey’s book, Great Sex Starts at 50? Enter code GREATSEX on ChronicleBooks.com for 30% off!