Messy & Magnificent with Karlee Fain


Curing the Knee Jerk “Yes”: Doable Boundaries That Will Set You Free with Nancy Levin

Ep. 32

Someone just asked you to do something for them, and before you’ve even had the chance to think it through, you find yourself saying, “Sure! I’d love to!” . Then, when the time comes to actually do it, you feel resentment rising within yourself. Familiar? 

Saying “yes” is a knee-jerk reaction for many of us. Whether you say “yes” out of obligation, genuine excitement, or just muscle memory, that feeling of resentment or exhaustion that follows is a key indicator that it’s time to up your boundary game.

But what do you do when someone pushes back on your boundary? 

Or they call you a b*tch for speaking your mind?

In this episode, Karlee interviews Nancy Levin, a boundary-setting master, and author of Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free, on how to know what to say on the spot when someone crosses your boundaries and how to respond to pushback.

Nancy sheds light on the idea of what a boundary truly is, and why a boundary – by her definition – cannot be crossed by someone else. Instead, you are the only one who can cross your boundary, and you are the only one who can uphold them, too. 

Tune in to learn to remedy the rising resentment within and reclaim your time and energy through setting and honoring your own boundaries. 

Some Questions Karlee Asks: 

  • What are some signs it's time to upgrade our boundaries? (5:06)
  • What’s a real-life example of how to maintain a boundary once you make one? (11:13)
  • How do people-pleasers finally have time their needs as much as (or even more!) than others’ needs? (24:10)
  • Why do we think setting a boundary makes us selfish? (35:10)
  • Why did you publish a book about boundaries right now? (40:09)

In This Episode, You Will Learn: 

  • Rewind - why boundaries actually have nothing to do with other people. (5:17)
  • Busting the myth that setting boundaries mean managing other people’s behavior. (13:17)
  • How to say "no" without having to convince or prove yourself. (19:44)
  • 3 steps to give yourself permission to consider your own needs at least as much as everyone else. (22:06)
  • Why women have disowned the quality “selfish,” and how fear of fear prioritizing yourself is messing you up. (36:10)

Connect with Nancy to Upgrade Your Boundaries and Worth: 







Resource Mentioned: 

Find Your True North: A 4-Day Journey to Reconnect and Rediscover You. A FREE Online Event with Nancy Levin from June 15-18th, 2020

Worthy by Nancy Levin

Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free by Nancy Levin

Doors Open Soon For The Reclaiming Time Studio Summer Class

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The Art of Subtraction: How Women Keep Career Plans Simple, Life-Giving And Successful During Complex Times

Ep. 61
As we look to plan a new year, that inevitably means that our schedules fill up with really important tasks, meetings, and projects… right? Well, it could mean all of the above, but it definitely doesn’t have to.Successful women everywhere know that being busy all the time doesn’t equate to achievement.Being weighed down with a calendar just means you're busy and that you’re good at filling in the blanks. But, what if I told you that being less available and more choosy about that blank space in your calendar could actually make you more effective?Time management is a word that gets thrown around among the busy crowd, but the real meaning of that is misunderstood. We think it’s about squeezing as much into those daily hours as humanly possible. The truth is that it really means the opposite.In today’s episode, Karlee shares the second part of her professional PPE method: planning. She’ll teach you how to recognize and root out complexity, and how you can master the Art of Subtraction.Finding ways to simplify your life isn’t about being lazy or inactive. It’s about choosing the most important ways to spend your time. It’s running through your daily grind with a fine-toothed comb and getting rid of the clutter that doesn’t need to happen at all, could be done by someone else, or could be drastically simplified.If you’re ready to learn how to eliminate the clutter in your schedule and create more space in your life, then this episode is for you.What You’ll Learn in This Episode:How distraction throws us off course (10:17)Closing the gap between what we communicate and what’s understood (13:08)Using simpler language to make the message clear (15:02)The myth of the multitasker (17:12)The unconscious fear behind why we delay (17:58)How to make your life 3% simpler (19:14)3 steps for streamlining your planning for 2021 (22:02)The Art of Subtraction (24:28)Scheduling in moments to recharge (28:30)Resources Mentioned In This Episode:Karlee’s FREE Course: Boundaries Like a BossEpisode 60: Daring To Pause Before you Plan: Karlee's Nourishing "PPE Method" for Making Your Best Decisions at Work and Beyond, Part of 1 of 3Episode 36: Reopening Gently: A Simple Practice to Process What Just Happened and Move Forward with Wisdom and GraceStudy: “Putting a stereotype to the test: The case of gender differences in multitasking costs in task-switching and dual-task situations”Hirsch, P., Koch, I., & Karbach, J. (2019). Putting a stereotype to the test: the case of gender differences in multitasking costs in task-switching and dual-task situations. Plos One, 14(8). Doi: 10.1371/journal.pone.0220150Study: “The Cost of Interrupted Work: More Speed and Stress”Mark, G., Gudith, D., & Klocke, U. (2008). The cost of interrupted work. Proceeding of the Twenty-sixth Annual CHI Conference on Human Factors in Computing Systems – CHI 08. Doi: 10.1145/1357054.1357072Get the Culmination Mastersheet Karlee Mentions In This Episode for Free Below "Episode 36" HereConnect With Karlee:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramMessy and Magnificent is produced by the folks at Ginni Media.

Daring To Pause Before you Plan: Karlee's Nourishing "PPE Method" for Making Your Best Decisions at Work and Beyond, Part of 1 of 3

Ep. 60
What’s the point of these cold, winter months? Why can’t we just run around outside all year long with sun-kissed shoulders and bask in the brightness?Well, as nice as that might sound, we need professional downtime. Our bodies need rest, and our minds need pause. Still, “downtime” is just a hard concept to digest. And it doesn't help that we’re conditioned to feel guilty about it.Despite the dreary mood of winter scenes, those naked branches and gray skies have purpose. When leaves fall from trees and shriveled brown buds drop to the ground, the body of that tree is giving itself permission to rest.It’s really important that as humans, we do the same. The cycle of the seasons holds purpose, and we zip through it at our own peril. While we might look outside and see a vast stillness, what we’re looking past and through is a whole lotta space. And that space is a lot more fertile than we give it credit for.It’s in that newly transparent space, the space that was once taken up by distractingly pretty blooms... the space of their absence is where we’ll find answers.In today’s episode, Karlee talks about the importance of making space for pause. Winter is a time to integrate & marinate. It’s a time for healing the burnout of the hustle season. It’s a culmination. It’s an invitation to rest.For that, you’ll need your P.P.E. We’re not talking about masks here. This stands for Pause, Plan, and Experiment. This is the season to find space in the void, distinguish the difference between urgency and importance, and to approach things a little more experimentally.If you’re ready to honor the presence of space in your life, see the unseen, and find meaningful pause, then this episode is for you.What You’ll Learn in This Episode:What we can learn from the darkness of winter (1:36)How to find answers in the stillness (4:40)Why you should be paying attention to the unseen (8:30)How to equip yourself with P.P.E. (15:36)Why pause is necessary to inspire creativity (22:45)5 things that have brought meaning to me this year (25:31)Why it’s OK to feel two opposing things at the same time (30:10)Why goals aren’t all they’re cracked up to be (32:27)The productive power of rest (34:04)People Mentioned In This Episode:Dana LemayResources Mentioned In This Episode:NASA: Slime Mold Simulations Used to Map Dark Matter Holding Universe TogetherSunset and Twilight: From the Diaries of 1947-1958 by Bernard BerensonKarlee’s FREE Course: Boundaries Like a BossEpisode 1: One Word that Will Elevate Everything You DoEpisode 12: Permission to Rest: And how to have the time to do it!Connect With Karlee:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramMessy and Magnificent is produced by the folks at Ginni Media.

Lifestyle Rich: Free yourself from the tyranny of "I need to do it all" thinking and get big results by going small with Karin Rozell

Ep. 59
A year ago today, what did your morning routine look like? Maybe you peeled open your eyes as your alarm clock annoyingly assaulted your senses way too early in the morning. You did your hair, put on a sensible outfit, and made the commute to work. You toiled all day, came home tired, and did your best to shut off your brain before crawling into bed. Work. Rest. Repeat.Oh, how things have changed.For the better part of a year now, Covid has caused us to slow down. It’s forced us to step out of the hustle and alter our daily routines. If you’ve been able to look away from the general train wreck that has been 2020 and slip on your rose-colored glasses for even a second, you might have noticed that as the pace of life has slowed down, it’s also created space for you to breathe.In this strange season of relative stillness, is it possible that there’s a gift hidden in there somewhere?It’s time to ask yourself: Do I need to be going so fast?Today, Karlee talks to Karin Rozell, a self-proclaimed “business nerd” and marketing mindset teacher. She’s written 2 business books, and created the Happy Little Practice Method to help moms create and scale their businesses.After consciously defecting from the big city hustle and recalibrating to the rhythms of nature, Karin found that a 'less is more' approach to life and business brought a new sense of calm and clarity to everything she did.In this episode, she flips our concept of the definition of success into something that’s based less on the traditional model, and shaped instead around the concept of lifestyle richness. Wealth isn’t about collecting cash, it’s about choosing how you spend your day.The gift hidden in the chaos of this year might actually be simplicity. How can we adopt a minimalist mindset? How can we do less, but do it better?If you’re ready to unbind yourself from the pressure of constant doing, and transition into a space of peaceful being, then this episode is for you!Some Questions Karlee Asks:How did you transition from doing such big work in the city to running your practice in a totally different way? (7:39)Why is small the new big? (13:19)How does a lifestyle-rich shift begin to happen? (17:55)How do you fan the flames of your focus during Covid? (21:27)How do you simplify your social media presence? (27:05)What do you do in your practice that might surprise people? (36:05)How little is enough? (46:40)What You’ll Learn in This Episode:What happens when you synch your work to the natural rhythm of nature. (9:25)Why that feeling of peace might mean you’ve made it to where you want to be. (14:00)“Happy” as a business strategy. (18:22)Why the feeling of overwhelm is a message to simplify. (22:20)The human value of exposing our “wildly imperfect” moments. (31:25)Why self-care isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. (39:12)How to create your personal definition of wealth. (51:05)People Mentioned In This Episode:Sonia Renee TaylorDana LemayFabienne FredricksonResources Mentioned In This Episode:The Happy Little Practice MethodSmall is the New BigThe One Thing: The Surprisingly Simple Truth Behind Extraordinary Results by Gary KellerEssentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeownJerry Before SeinfeldEpisode 15: Building the Habit of Courage: How to stop enduring what drains you with Dana LemayConnect with Karin Rozell:WebsiteInstagramConnect With Karlee:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramMessy and Magnificent is produced by the folks at Ginni Media.