Share

cover art for 1321 || the best advice of 2024

Make Your Damn Bed

1321 || the best advice of 2024

•

1. You get one body. Be kind to it. Whatever sucks about it (more than likely) doesn’t compare to what doesn’t suck about it. Learn to appreciate the badass vessel that it is + honor your commitment to it. You’re stuck with it, so you may as well get along with it. 


2. You get one mind. See above.


3. You get one round at this life. How you spend your days is how you spend your life, so don’t put it off waiting for shit to happen to you - instead go out there and make it happen for you. 


4. You are not your thoughts.


5. Your reality isn’t the only reality. All realities are valid despite sometimes conflicting. Work to adopt more neutral perspectives to gain more objective reflections on reality. 


6. Change your perspective, change your experience. You change the outcome by changing your interpretation of the situation. Bringing the right attitude can greatly improve almost any situation.  


7. Slow the fuck down. Timelines are literally bullshit. Don’t rush it. Don’t stress it. Let shit flow and learn to enjoy the between times. 


8. They aren’t mad at you. If you didn’t give them a reason to be mad, and they didn’t directly communicate to you that they were mad at you? Stop worrying. 99% of the time they’re busy + distracted + forgot to respond. Relax. Unless you fucked up, stop feeling bad for shit you didn’t do. 


9. In fact, nobody is paying attention to you as closely as you think they are. Your life is yours. Write your story, don’t stress over the critics. As long as you’re not hurting anyone else, you’re allowed to do whatever the fuck you want, whenever the fuck you want. 


10. You are not unlovable. You are a badass human. You have had positive impacts on humans you literally didn’t remember existing + the world is genuinely a better place simply because you’re in it. You haven’t yet met all the people who will love you.


11. You don’t need to work so hard to be “liked”. Protect your peace, set appropriate boundaries, say no, but be kind + vulnerable + honest. The best way to be a crowd pleaser is not to be a people pleaser.


12. Leave shit better than you found it.


13. Internal peace is more rewarding and sustainable than happiness.


14. Your looks are the least interesting thing about you. 


15. Practice pausing before responding. Automatic reactions are human, but they’re typically not reflective of our reality. Take an extra second to think. 


16.Giving yourself the love/attention/value you seek from others is the key to being open to actually receiving the love you seek. 


GET AN OCCASIONAL PERSONAL EMAIL FROM ME: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.com

TUNE IN ON INSTAGRAM FOR COOL CONTENT: www.instagram.com/mydbpodcast

OR BE A REAL GEM + TUNE IN ON PATREON: www.patreon.com/MYDBpodcast

OR WATCH ON YOUTUBE: www.youtube.com/juliemerica 


The opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

More episodes

View all episodes

  • 1744 || your sign to do some arts + crafts (and go play)

    09:53|
    We know that Breathwork, nourishment, sleep, and a safe environment regulate your nervous system. Play regulates your nervous system, too. Touch regulates your nervous system, sensory deprivation does too.Nature regulates your nervous system, so does being around community. Travel regulates your nervous system, and so does returning to your home. Routine can regulate your nervous system, and so can spontaneity. Both stillness and movement, sunlight and moonlight, predictability and novelty.It's nuanced and paradoxical and it's about you staying conscious and flexible. It's about embodying what you want to feel. I think the key is balancing what works. And if you’re alive, you’ve already been doing that. Maybe not healthily or sustainably, but you’ve been doing it. It’s never gonna be the easiest work, but you can make it easier. By relaxing into it. Letting everything become an experiment and only allowing your experience guide you, not trap you into thinking you can’t handle it differently. “There will always be more to do. The cleaning and laundry won’t stop. The inbox will refill. The to-do list will rewrite itself overnight. But your life isn’t just a series of tasks to complete. Go for the walk. Call your friend. Slow down without trying to optimize the moment. You dont need to clear your entire life before you’re allowed to feel ease. Because if that’s the rule, ease will never come. So learn to pause in the middle of it, not at the end of it.” - Vex King  Watch the Eliza Day Video HereRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1743 || when to stop analyzing

    10:58|
    The goal is conscious choices > conditioned responses. Our society bases it’s values on exploitation, violation, and extraction - and we’ve been letting that society convince us of what parts of ourselves are palatable, acceptable, and welcome. But we can’t depend on a broken society to share wisdom to make us less broken.  You get to prove it’s safe to “decide” for yourself what parts of yourself are worth exploring and embodying and which are worth censoring. Rather than allowing society to decide the barriers for us.  When you practice approaching the line in a safe circumstance, you are gradually restoring the ability to choose.  Your agency is slowly seeping back into those cracks, with every new approach. Watch the Eliza Day Video HereRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1742 || future rehearsals

    11:23|
    Don't forget to rehearse the best case scenario for every worst case scenario rehearsal. S - Stop! - Freeze! Your emotions may try to make you act without thinking. Stay in control! T - Take a step back! - Take a break. Let go. Take a breath. Reevaluate. O - Observe! - Notice what is going on inside and outside. What is the situation? What are your thoughts and feelings? What are others saying or doing?P - Proceed mindfully! - Act with awareness. Consider your thoughts and feelings, the situation, and other people’s thoughts and feelings. Think about your values and goals. Ask Wise Mind: Which actions will make it better or worse?Today's resource is accessible here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1741 || take back the wheel

    11:00|
    Make a commitment to drop your usual escape methods as soon as you notice yourself doing them, and redirect. Maybe that looks like doing the opposite action, or it could be something subtle you do mentally, or say out loud to yourself, or write down, or tell someone else about. Today's resource is accessible here and here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1740 || practice not getting swept up

    10:54|
    Practice, patience, and persistence is required to reinforce the neural pathways you'd rather reinforce. Some distress is unavoidable, and you are fully capable of dealing with distress. Balance improving + acceptance. When you feel yourself self soothing with something negative, redirect. Practice creating space between your immediate reaction and your actual response. Show your brain it's safe to practice new reactions. Today's resource is accessible here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1739 || ride the wave

    10:29|
    Coping with stress? No thanks. Avoiding stress? Yes please. I tend to use a combination platter of situational avoidance, numbing, reassurance seeking, over-planning, constant checking, and more! That said, it only creates more of a mess for me down the road.Something that has helped me sit with myself more honestly is to recognize that emotions and uncomfortable feelings come in waves. I can learn ways to ride them more joyfully, rather than trying to fight them or dodge them so terribly. The fear makes it worse. The avoidance makes the problem bigger. So I am learning to surf the waves through various options that depend on the context: Dive under and pop up refreshed and exhilarated. Body board or surf board (tools and resources available to make it fun) or Body surfing, trusting and allow the waves to guide you and you can bail when it’s no longer serving your journey. Today's resource is accessible here.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1738 || when discomfort feels impossible

    09:46|
    The more we fear, struggle with, and try to avoid any form of distress, generally the worse that distress gets. Distress intolerance remains due to certain beliefs they have developed about experiencing negative emotions. These beliefs tend to centre on the notion that negative emotion is bad in some way, unbearable, unacceptable, or will lead to disastrous consequences. These beliefs tend to make any negative emotion that we may feel, become a highly distressing emotional experience. Today's resource is accessible here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1737 || distress intolerance

    08:45|
    Today's resource is accessible here. A negative emotion in itself is not necessarily distressing, we only begin to feel distressed when we evaluate our emotional experience as a bad thing.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. 

  • 1736 || when your nervous system gets interrupted

    08:53|
    Seeing traumatic symptoms as an interrupted natural response and as unreleased energy in the body rather than a disease can lift a burden for traumatized people. - Daniela Ramirez-DuranNoticing Physical Comfort – Feeling physical support and experiencing your physical boundaries in a safe space can bring feelings of comfort.Self-Soothing Touch – Boundaries are usually broken with trauma, and it is essential to recover this by working with the body. Touch can instill containment and create a soothing sensation.Soothing Breath – Breath and touch can help soothe both the body and the mind. Slow deep breathing can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, bringing a feeling of relaxation and calmness.Grounding and Centering – People commonly experience a loss of grounding and are thrown off balance. Grounding allows feelings of safety and inner strength to emerge.Evoking Kindness – Remembering a time when you experienced kindness from someone can evoke pleasant physical and emotional sensations.Recalling Being Yourself – Coming back to yourself can provide a greater sense of being grounded and feeling comfortable in your own skin.The Voo Sound – Making sounds and vibrations with your own voice can have a soothing effect on the body and can also be a means to discharge activation.Shake It Off – Animals often shake themselves to release the excess energy produced from the stress response. Allowing your body to connect with the trembling sensation produced by a stressful event can enable your system to settle.TODAY'S EPISODE CREDIT: https://positivepsychology.com/somatic-experiencing/https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/-/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Facing-Your-Feelings/Facing-Your-Feelings---01---Understanding-Distress-Intolerance.pdfRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed Podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. Make Your Damn Bed podcast is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.