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The Luke and Pete Show
Funkadelic Franky
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Today, the lads kick things off with a classic Jeremy Kyle moment: a man boldly declares he loves cocaine more than his kids. This prompts a discussion on addiction where Luke accuses Pete of being addicted to papier-mâché (he doesn’t deny it) and Pete issues a public warning about glue powders – specifically the deeply cursed meat glue.
Elsewhere, a casual confession about a recent outdoor wee sends them into a surprisingly passionate debate about the regional politics of public urination. And yes, Pete’s still convinced he could build Luke’s house extension. Luke hasn’t yet been persuaded.
Just another completely normal Monday.
Email us at hello@lukeandpeteshow.com or you can get in touch on X, Threads or Instagram if character-restricted messaging takes your fancy.
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What's That Cash For, Sir?
32:41|I know what you're thinking - if I download this episode of The Luke and Pete Show, what can I expect to hear? Well, first off you're going to hear about a really expensive tuna. After that you're going to find out all about what it's like trying to get cash out of a bank these days, a conversation which naturally evolves into Pete's latest run in with the taxman, and after that there's a bit of chat about looksmaxxing, something that you will be genuinely worse off for hearing about. But don't let that put you off! And send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com. DO IT NOW!Hand Warmers of Various Types
34:23|Hello and welcome back to what feels like a podcast at the end of the world. Put it this way, Pete is desperate to know where he can secure regular asthma medication from as we edge ever closer to the abyss.In the meantime, the lads still find time to talk about purchasing paint, why you shouldn't urinate in the sink, and Axl Rose's performing habits. There's also adverts for soup, a very welcome New Year's appearance from Battery Robot, and the question on everyone's lips - will Luke and Pete invade Greenland?New Year, new questions? Only one place to put them: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comWho Let the Wallabies Out?
28:30|Looking back on it, how weird was Covid? Luke and Pete share some of their oddest memories of a strange time, before going on to chat about potential new pandemics, executions and the story of pellagra in the Deep South.After that, they open up the email pipes and hear your stories about wallabies in the Midlands, guide dogs failing their training and a food poisoning story with a twist. To get involved yourself, it's hello@lukeandpeteshow.com50 Shades of Paté
36:34|The Luke and Pete Show is back for another year, and what better way to start 2026 than to have a deep and fairly involved conversation about paté? And when does a paté become a parfait? And when does it become a terrine?Elsewhere, Pete needs a new fridge, the lads run the rule over Enid Blyton and Roald Dahl, and there's plenty of other chat besides. Oh, and are we starting off the year with a brand new player into the Battery Daddy? Tune in to find out...New Year, new questions? Only one place to put them: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comGot Any Old Beef?
41:24|Pete's beef wellington didn't quite go to plan on Christmas Day, due to some promises made by a butcher that simply weren't kept. But did he let that setback deter him? Tune in to find out. Elsewhere, there's some sizable kebab shop chat, Pete has been wrestling with His Majesty's Revenue and Customs again, and the boys hear from a listener who developed food poisoning in one of the most impressive locations on Earth. Oh, and Luke's put his house on the market - first port of call? Bothering the property photographer with annoying questions about photoshop and shutter speeds...Christmas-related comments or queries? Only one place to put them: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comThree Noel Edmonds Coasters and a Christmas Samurai
42:15|Merry Christmas everyone! Luke and Pete muster on Christmas Day to deliver you a festive, bumper edition of the Luke and Pete Show, because they know it's what you all asked for from Santa...This time around there's chat about Jake Paul's broken jaw (truly a Christmas present for everyone, that), a truly bizarre claim from the husband of an ex-Blue Peter presenter, some server chat from Pete because it's his Christmas as well, and then Luke wraps things up by playing "What's Pete doing at this time on Christmas Day?" (Hint: it mostly involves farts).Merry Christmas everyone! Enjoy the festive season!Subscribe to join us, and email whenever you like: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comExperiencing Paddington
27:46|Pete has been hanging out with one of the world's most famous bears, and do you know what? He bloody enjoyed it. But the feel-good chat doesn't last very long, and before they know it the lads are taking in their listeners' best food poisoning stories.Elsewhere, there's raccoons. Or rather, one particular raccoon that keeps escaping...Subscribe to join us, and email whenever you like: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comA Night in a Hostel
31:16|Welcome back to a new episode of the Luke and Pete Show! As we build up towards Christmas, the lads talk presents, including a very thoughtful gift Pete has been working on. Ah, bless. Unfortunately he reverts to type fairly shortly after that after his gastric problems come back and he finds himself stranded in London with nowhere to go.Luke and Pete also find time to hear from an American that enjoyed a strange experience upon visiting Camden, and there's one or two carpet anecdotes as well. What more do you need?Subscribe to join us, and email whenever you like: hello@lukeandpeteshow.comFinally! A Podcast Episode About Food Poisoning
32:49|How is Pete preparing his turkey for Christmas dinner this year? By sticking it in the freezer, of course. Pray for his guests, particularly when it sounds like the rest of the day's food is going to be cooked in his airfryer.Elsewhere, and as the title suggests, the lads discuss several tales of food poisoning (unrelated to Pete's cooking, it has to be said), there's a good trip down memory lane discussing old video games and, for some reason, Pete attempted to close out the episode by speaking some Welsh. Subscribe to join us, and email whenever you like: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com