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The Luke and Pete Show
AI toenails
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What really is the definition of artificial intelligence? Enjoyably, Pete tries to explain that on today's show...
On a different but strangely related note, we learn more about the possibility of people wearing fake toenails and we hear from a listener who explains why HP Sauce is popular with people indigenous to the Arctic Circle.
You can't say this show is not a broad church...
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The Luke and Pete Show is the sometimes ridiculous, always funny podcast with Luke Moore and Pete Donaldson: two men who have time on their hands and a good idea of how to waste it. Subscribe to get your comedy podcast fix every Monday and Thursday.
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Dispatches from Orchestra Camp
35:27|New Lime bikes are being rolled out! Big news for a man (Luke) who’s racked up an incredible number of kilometres on the current ones.There’s also some information coming out of Major League Baseball which brings to mind Pete’s famous “infant chip bowl helmet” idea. For newer listeners, those words will be explained.Finally, Luke reads aloud a letter written by a young Peter to his parents. What happens at orchestra camp stays at orchestra camp.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.Leave the Tortoise Alone
29:09|Mr Donaldson's about to turn 45 and frankly Luke is shocked he made it this far. Before the big day, though, he’s off to WrestleMania in Vegas. Fingers crossed he runs into Kash Patel.Today’s show is an animal-heavy one, as Luke and Pete exchange stories about well-endowed donkeys and investigate recent happenings surrounding the world’s oldest land animal, Jonathan the Tortoise. The late, great Harambe gets a mention, too.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.Schrödinger’s Poo
31:13|Pete’s been using an angle grinder and it’s made his cabin smell awful. Luke’s son is reassuring him that he hasn’t done a poo. All is right in the world.Today’s topics include the natural beauty of Norfolk, the deaths of Margaret Thatcher and Osama Bin Laden and the wonders of what3words. Don’t die in an embarrassing quadrant, whatever you do.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.A Balustrade Tragedy
26:06|Pete’s got a new project and it’s nearly claimed his life already. It involves walls, glass, vans and a great deal of calamity. Before any of that, though, there’s a more serious matter to attend to: what defines “European-strength” pornography?Also on today’s episode, we've got exploding appendixes and plenty of listener correspondence, including a new potential segment titled “Earnest or Irritating?” Mr Donaldson will decide whether an influencer’s output is essentially likable and sincere or jarring and cynical. Get your suggested subjects in.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.Ten American Men
34:16|Under the microscope this fine Monday: the land of the free and the home of the brave. Luke and Pete discuss the recent passing of Robert Mueller, Kash Patel’s shoes and pink hair in the FBI.Staying on the subject of the US of A, Mr Moore has a challenge for Mr Donaldson. Can he name any ten American men? There’s literally only one way to find out.Plus, we’ve got a new mission for you, the listener. How accurately (or inaccurately) is your profession typically depicted in the media? Get in touch.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.AKA the Bronx
29:54|On today’s show, Luke laments the inherent meekness of the British and their aversion to revolution. Thank God for a new set of golf clubs to lift his spirits a bit. Pete, meanwhile, is getting stuck in the long grass of naming conventions and the business of double-barrelling.We’ve also got a bizarrely-decorated hard hat to investigate and the origin of a nickname to explain.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.The Last Men on Earth
27:55|If Luke and Pete were to leave the studio to find they’re suddenly the only people left on the planet, what would the strategy be? Minor spoiler: primates and Lime Bikes would be involved.Also up for discussion are parking tickets, jarring tonal shifts in hip-hop and an email about bubbly water.Plus, we find out what Pete was up to in the 90s.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.Elderly Japanese Lady Golfer
28:42|Remember when you used to get fat footballers? Luke and Pete do.On today’s episode, the guys discuss the sartorial choices of football fans of the past and present, as well as those of golfers and middle-aged men more generally. Not only that, but there’s an offering for the Battery Robot and some big news concerning Afroman.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.Goodnight to the Metaverse
33:20|The trailer for SNL UK is out and Luke and Pete are sticking to their original predictions vis à vis its quality. But there’s bigger fish to fry on this fine Monday because video game faces have been yassified and, $80 billion later, the Metaverse is dead.Elsewhere, Luke shouts out Denis Norden and David Niven’s wartime pasts and Pete gives his thoughts on contemporary British and Irish stars of the screen.Send us your latest stories, questions and comments here: hello@lukeandpeteshow.com.