How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

If your children have been at each other all week, this episode will change everything.I’m diving into one of the biggest sources of family stress - sibling conflict - and why it’s almost never about the toy, the sofa, or the “look” one child gave the other, and nearly always about your children’s emotional buckets overflowing.In this bucket-emptying episode, I walk you through three powerful tools I use with families every day:• Weekly one‑to‑one special time that transforms behaviour through connection• Protected “own time” so each child can decompress and reset• Real‑time descriptive praise that rewires the emotional climate in your homeYou’ll learn how to stop refereeing, reduce friction, and help your children regulate themselves, even during school holidays, long weekends, or those intense indoor days when everyone is in each other’s pockets.Pick one tool this week and watch the shift.You’ve got this!So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:55 - Sibling conflict is not what you think02:07 - Special time07:19 - Time and space09:14 - Descriptive praise💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

You don’t need more time with your child. You just need five intentional minutes.And in this episode, I’ll show you exactly why those tiny moments matter more than you think.If you’ve ever worried that you’re not present enough, not connected enough, or that the days are slipping by while you’re juggling work, life and everything in between, you’re not alone. I hear this from parents constantly, but the research is clear and reassuring: children don’t need perfect parenting - they need consistent, emotionally responsive moments that tell them, “You matter to me.”In this episode, I’ll walk you through the science behind connection, why guilt is not reliable data, and what children truly need to feel secure and loved.You’ll learn four powerful micro‑moments you can weave into any day, including the two‑minute reunion, naming one feeling, child‑led play, and the pause‑before‑help technique that builds resilience in real time.I’ll also share creative ways to stay connected when you can’t be physically present, from handwritten notes to voice messages to slow‑motion games played across the day.If you’re ready to feel more connected to your child without adding anything overwhelming to your plate, this episode will change the way you see your everyday moments.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:28 - It only takes five minutes02:42 - Parental guilt07:31 - The one thing all children need11:13 - How to support dysregulation12:45 - The two minute reunion14:35 - Name a feeling18:11 - Pause before you help19:43 - Connecting over physical distance24:31 - Games across time and space💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

Back‑chat isn’t your child being “difficult” - it’s a message. And in this episode, I’m going to show you how to finally hear it.If you’re dealing with eye‑rolls, snappy comebacks, or that sudden surge of attitude that leaves you wondering what on earth is happening, you’re not alone. So I’m going to unpack what back‑chat really means, why it shows up at any age, and the psychological needs sitting underneath it… especially your child’s deep drive for autonomy, agency and connection.You’ll learn the five hidden triggers that often fuel back‑chat (including stress, developmental leaps and inconsistent boundaries), and I’ll walk you through the five strategies I use with families every day to reduce defiance and rebuild cooperation.From offering meaningful choices, to shifting the power dynamic without losing authority, to creating daily connection time that transforms behaviour, you’ll come away with practical tools you can use immediately.If you’re ready to turn back‑chat from a battle into a breakthrough, this episode is for you.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:53 - Back-chat is not just a teen thing03:04 - The biggest symptoms10:22 - 5 strategies for coping with back-chat13:20 - The Three Cs17:07 - How are you doing?💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

In this episode, you’ll discover a completely different way to think about feeding your family - one that saves you time, money, stress, and emotional bandwidth, and joining me is Helen Hopkins, better known as The Meal Time Maverick, whose viral batch‑cooking method has transformed kitchens across the UK.Instead of filling your freezer with meals you forget to defrost, Helen shows you how to batch‑cook fresh dishes that live in your fridge and reheat in minutes.You’ll learn her simple “1–2–3” system, why it works for even the busiest families, and how it can stop the nightly dinner‑time chaos in its tracks. You’ll also hear how to build batching into your weekly habits, involve your children in food prep, and create healthier, calmer mealtimes for everyone.If you’re exhausted by cooking from scratch every night, this episode will feel like a lifeline.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:04 - Intro to Helen Hopkins02:45 - Going viral09:18 - The mix and match batch method14:54 - Cooking fresh isn’t easy17:18 - New habits always have resistance22:08 - Building a healthy relationship with food26:52 - Writing a book is cruel31:21 - Everyone else comes first34:34 - A frictionless society💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

We all have an inner critic. Even us parents.In today’s episode, I explore one of the most overlooked but powerful ways to lighten your emotional load and quieten your inner critic.Modern parenting gives that critical voice endless opportunities to speak up - especially when we compare our behind‑the‑scenes chaos to everyone else’s curated highlight reel. I unpack why we’re so much kinder to our children than to ourselves, and why questioning your parenting isn’t a sign of failure but a sign that you care.Drawing on the concept of ‘good enough parenting’ and the growing research on self‑compassion, I share four practical things you can do to help shift your internal dialogue, regulate your nervous system, and reconnect with the parent you want to be.If you’re tired of feeling like you’re falling short, this episode will help you breathe, reset, and treat yourself with the same kindness you give your children. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:29 - I’ve had enough of not enough02:03 - Comparison culture04:24 - Connection over perfection05:48 - 5 minutes of guilt free time07:28 - Change your mental soundtrack09:54 - Find your people11:12 - Sleep matters💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

Hands up if you like homework…Me neither.But homework isn’t just a task to be completed. It’s a powerful opportunity to build persistence, resilience and independence in your children.Homework can so easily become a battleground filled with tears, avoidance and frustration, yet when we shift our focus from performance to process, everything changes. In today’s episode, I explore why the “how” of our support matters far more than the worksheets themselves, and why our job isn’t to rescue our children from discomfort but to create the conditions that help them start, stick with it and feel capable.You are going to learn how to tailor homework routines to your child’s needs, how to spot when avoidance is really anxiety or perfectionism, and how to use five practical strategies to transform homework from a nightly fight into a long‑term skill‑building habit.If homework has become a source of stress in your home, this episode will help you reset the dynamic with clarity and confidence.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:33 - Not just about the work03:52 - Focus on the how05:17 - Who’s homework is it?09:50 - How to support your child12:03 - Homework avoidance14:05 - Connection over correction17:09 - Praise the process20:49 - The bigger goal💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

In today’s bucket‑emptying episode, I explore what it really means to live with parental guilt - that ever‑present tug that arrives the moment we become parents and never fully disappears.I talk about why guilt isn’t a sign that you’re failing, but a natural by‑product of caring deeply across multiple roles: parent, professional, partner, friend, adult child.Instead of treating guilt as a performance metric, I walk you through how to reframe it, define what “good enough” looks like, and create small proof‑points that remind you you’re showing up where it matters. I also unpack why work‑life balance is a myth, how to be fully present where you are, and how to avoid the comparison traps that intensify guilt.By the end of this episode, you will have a kinder, more grounded way to navigate the emotional weight of parenting, and a handy blueprint you can return to whenever guilt tries to take over. So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:44 - Parental guilt happens all the time02:51 - Guilt is not a reliable metric05:28 - You can’t be in two places at once09:43 - Replace balance with presence12:39 - Build small proof moments15:55 - The uncomfortable truth💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

Do you have more than one child?Are they constantly fighting for your time and energy?So how do you parent siblings?In today’s episode, I explore how birth order shapes your children’s development, behaviour, and long‑term identity. You’ll learn why research consistently shows firstborn advantages in earnings, IQ, and academic outcomes, and what sits beneath those patterns - from early illness exposure to diluted parental attention to the powerful “teaching effect” between siblings.I also help you unpack the hidden family roles your children adopt - the helper, the funny one, the responsible one - and how these labels quietly shape their confidence, conflict style, friendships, and even their future workplace behaviour.Most importantly, you will understand why each of your children is growing up in a completely different childhood, and how being aware of this helps you reduce friction, avoid unhelpful comparisons, and support healthier sibling relationships at home.With the tools and tips I share in this episode, you can start making meaningful changes today.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:02:00 - First borns outperform their younger siblings05:38 - Germ theory10:48 - The teaching effect12:59 - Siblings find their niche15:52 - Birth order impacts adult relationships19:07 - Family roles impact self-image22:04 - Every sibling has a different childhood26:27 - We compare ourselves all the time💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.

In this episode, I will explain the viral “Where’s Jessica?” distraction trend and discover whether it truly helps your child manage big emotions.I am going to show you why distraction can work in the moment - the novelty, the shift in attention, and the calm, curious tone that naturally regulates your child’s nervous system, and you’ll see why relying on distraction long‑term can backfire, teaching your child to avoid uncomfortable feelings rather than build emotional resilience.I want you to come away from today’s bucket emptying episode understanding the difference between a quick win and a meaningful skill, and feel clearer about when distraction is appropriate… and when it prevents your child from developing the confidence and coping strategies they genuinely need.If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re helping or accidentally hindering your child’s emotional growth, this episode gives you the clarity, compassion, and practical insight you’ve been looking for.So pour yourself a cuppa, find a comfy seat, and enjoy the conversation…Highlights from this episode:00:38 - Where’s Jessica?03:15 - Emotional cues06:48 - The novelty factor09:44 - Trading emotions12:36 - A friction free world💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together💚  For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/ 💚  For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library 💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.