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Her Voice Matters

Why Am I Crying Over Someone Who Hurt Me?

Everyone talks about the pain of leaving an abusive relationship.

But nobody talks about the grief that comes after.

The grief of losing the person you thought they were.

The grief of losing the future you imagined.

The grief of watching mutual friends choose sides.

The grief of realizing the apology may never come.

The grief of healing from someone you never should have had to heal from in the first place.


In this powerful episode of Her Voice Matters, Jordan Murphy dives deep into the hidden layers of grief that survivors experience after narcissistic abuse, emotional abuse, domestic violence, and toxic relationships.

You'll learn why it's normal to miss someone who hurt you, how trauma bonds affect the brain, why healing isn't linear, and what it takes to finally stop waiting for closure and start creating it for yourself.


If you've ever asked yourself, "Why am I still crying over someone who treated me so badly?" this episode is for you.

Because healing isn't about forgetting what happened.

It's about learning how to carry it differently.


Episode Highlights


✨ Why grief after abuse feels different than other types of grief

✨ The difference between grieving the person and grieving the fantasy

✨ How trauma bonds create emotional withdrawal symptoms

✨ Why survivors often miss their abuser even after recognizing the abuse

✨ The childhood wounds abusive relationships often expose

✨ How to stop waiting for closure and begin healing

✨ Practical steps for rebuilding trust with yourself


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