Grief & Happiness

Episode 454 of Grief and Happiness features author Arik Housley on losing his 18-year-old daughter, Alaina, in the 2018 Borderline Bar & Grill mass shooting. He shares his path to forgiveness and post-traumatic growth, from his teenage son's eulogy the night of the tragedy to the well-meaning phrases that missed the mark, offering practical wisdom on showing up for the grieving.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(01:00) Arik Housley introduces himself and the loss of his daughter, Alaina(02:16) Finding strength in vulnerability, and a story that reshaped his faith(04:46) The night of the Borderline shooting and the family's evacuation(07:52) His 14-year-old son's decision to write a eulogy that same night(09:57) Speaking at the Parents of Murdered Children's Conference(14:29) Navigating the line between giving privacy and creating isolation(17:06) What to say — and what not to say — to someone who's grieving(20:36) Why "I know how you feel" can do more harm than good(24:47) Choosing joy and carrying love forward after unimaginable loss(25:45) The story behind his book, Always NovemberArik Housley is an author, entrepreneur, and public speaker based in Napa Valley, California, where he has spent nearly 30 years building a portfolio of businesses spanning grocery stores, a winery, and a restaurant. He is the father of Alaina Housley, killed at 18 in the 2018 mass shooting at Borderline Bar & Grill in Thousand Oaks, and author of the bestselling memoir Always November: Lessons in Loss, Love and Resilience, co-written with novelist Holly Lynn Payne. In Alaina's memory, he and his wife, Hannah, founded Alaina's Voice Foundation, supporting mental health and education, and he now speaks widely at universities and conferences on grief and resilience.In this episode, Arik shares the story behind Always November, from the night his family learned of Alaina's murder to the post-traumatic growth that followed, including his decision to forgive the shooter for his own sake, and how he helped his teenage son process the loss of his sister. Much of the conversation turns practical, as Arik offers guidance for supporting the grieving: navigating the line between giving space and disappearing, and why saying something imperfect beats saying nothing at all. He closes by reflecting on how honesty, even when painful, builds the trust that carries families through tragedy.Connect with Arik Housley:WebsiteFacebookInstagramLinkedInSubstackBook: Arik Housley - Always NovemberLet's Connect: WebsiteLinkedInFacebookInstagramTwitterPinterestThe Grief and Happiness AllianceBook: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Keeping track of what makes you happy can make you happier!Let's Connect:You can join the Grief and Happiness Alliance which meets weekly on Sundays by clicking hereYou can order the International Best Selling The Grief and Happiness Guide by clicking here.You can order Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief by clicking here at Amazon:You can listen to my podcast, Grief and Happiness, by clicking hereRequest your Awaken Your Happiness Journaling Guide hereSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

If you've ever felt divorce only leaves one way to fight, episode 452 of Grief and Happiness is for you. Divorce coach Karen McNenny reframes divorce as its own kind of grief, sharing tools for splitting with dignity, from a "divorce announcement" to protecting kids caught in the middle.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(01:04) Karen McNenny's divorce story and founding the Good Divorce Academy(03:23) Emily on staying in an unhappy marriage because she felt she "had to"(04:17) Why society permits changing everything except marital status(07:52) The "elegant exit" and Karen's mayonnaise-jar metaphor for knowing it's over(10:45) The shame and judgment divorcing families face, and how to support them(13:23) The "divorce announcement" tool for controlling the narrative(17:30) Why kids should never be the mediator or messenger between parents(20:54) Comparing the grief of divorce versus losing a spouse to death(31:10) Karen's wound-to-scar metaphor for how divorce grief healsKaren McNenny is a mediator, certified divorce coach, and co-parenting specialist, and the founder of The Good Divorce Academy. A Montana native with a BFA from Montana State University and graduate studies in London as a Rotary International Scholar, she spent 25 years as a business consultant before shifting her focus to divorce work during the pandemic. She is the author of The Good Divorce: How to End Your Marriage Without Ending Your Family and hosts The Good Divorce Show, now in its fourth season, featuring couples and individuals who've navigated separation well. In this episode, Karen reframes divorce as a form of grief that's too often overlooked and under-supported, drawing on her own divorce 15 years ago to argue that couples default to adversarial, court-driven splits when society offers no "elegant exit." She shares practical tools from her coaching practice — like writing a joint "divorce announcement" to head off gossip and isolation — and stresses that children should never be used as messengers or mediators between parents. She also unpacks divorce's layered losses (identity, routine, social circle), offering her signature image of grief as a wound that scars but never fully vanishes, and connects her story to Emily's in exploring where divorce grief and death grief overlap and diverge.Connect with Karen McNenny:WebsiteFacebookInstagramLinkedInYouTubePodcast: Good Divorce ShowBook: Karen McNenny - The Good DivorceLet's Connect: WebsiteLinkedInFacebookInstagramTwitterPinterestThe Grief and Happiness AllianceBook: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

When you live mindfully, you can savor those moments you’ve expandedLet's Connect:You can join the Grief and Happiness Alliance which meets weekly on Sundays by clicking hereYou can order the International Best Selling The Grief and Happiness Guide by clicking here.You can order Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief by clicking here at Amazon:You can listen to my podcast, Grief and Happiness, by clicking hereRequest your Awaken Your Happiness Journaling Guide hereSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 450 of Grief and Happiness features author Annisha Page, who lost her mother suddenly at 17 and turned her grief into Grieving Her, a memoir with blank pages for readers to process their own loss. She shares how music, journaling, and counseling helped her reach acceptance, and why she now urges listeners to stop taking loved ones for granted.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(00:51) Annisha's decision to write a memoir after losing her mother suddenly at 17(02:19) Why so many people bottle up their grief instead of learning how to process it(03:46) The purpose behind the reflection pages built into each chapter of her book(05:42) Why her own writing journey didn't begin until years after her loss(06:50) The music that carried her through grief, from gospel to Tupac(11:59) Reaching acceptance and finding a better place than she was at seventeen(12:52) The sudden loss of her mother and the lesson to never take loved ones for granted(16:37) Grieving Her: where to find the book and her online grief support communityAnnisha Page is the author of Grieving Her: A Journey Through the Loss of My Mother, a memoir chronicling the sudden loss of her mother when Page was just 17 years old. Written years later as she moved through her own grieving process, the book weaves personal reflection with interactive journaling prompts, inviting readers to pause after each chapter and process their own emotions. Page also runs an online grief support community, where she offers a judgment-free space for others navigating loss to share their feelings and connect with people who understand what they're going through.In this episode, Annisha shares the story of her mother's sudden death in a car accident and the disorienting experience of trying to function as a normal teenager while carrying that loss. She talks candidly about how her grieving process unfolded over time, from leaning on music in her younger years to eventually turning to writing in her twenties as a way to process her feelings. Page also opens up about identifying her mother's body and the lasting impact of that moment, as well as the counseling that has helped her along the way. She closes with heartfelt advice for listeners: never take loved ones for granted, resolve conflicts quickly, and tell the people you love how you feel while you still have the chance.Connect with Annisha Page:Book: Annisha Page - Grieving Her: A Journey Through the Loss of My MotherLet's Connect: WebsiteLinkedInFacebookInstagramTwitterPinterestThe Grief and Happiness AllianceBook: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

Who would you like to have as your guide or mentor as you deal with grief?Let's Connect:You can join the Grief and Happiness Alliance which meets weekly on Sundays by clicking hereYou can order the International Best Selling The Grief and Happiness Guide by clicking here.You can order Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief by clicking here at Amazon:You can listen to my podcast, Grief and Happiness, by clicking hereRequest your Awaken Your Happiness Journaling Guide hereSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

If you've ever wondered whether it's okay to feel relief alongside grief, episode 448 of Grief and Happiness is for you. Debut novelist Anna Nordberg shares how losing her mother as a teenager inspired her novel When She Was Ours. Drawing on twenty years as a journalist, she opens up about becoming a mother herself, rediscovering her own mother as a person, and why Americans still lack the language to talk about loss.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(00:55) Anna Nordberg's shift from journalism to her debut novel, When She Was Ours(02:35) Why grief is now a universal theme in books, film, and TV(03:49) Losing her mother at 17, and learning to hold relief and guilt(06:37) Creating a believably human mother inspired by her own mom(09:49) Setting the scene: a wedding, a diagnosis, a family under pressure(13:24) Why siblings are fiction's most underexplored bond(18:17) Researching medical detail firsthand, bringing journalistic rigor to fiction(24:13) A fictional scene that shifted her bond with her mother's memory(27:24) The "Bay's daughter" moment, carrying her mother through her son's medical scare(32:44) Why writing is a healing, cathartic act, private or sharedAnna Nordberg is a journalist and culture writer whose essays have appeared in Slate, The Washington Post, The New York Times, and the San Francisco Chronicle. She grew up in New York City and now lives in San Francisco with her husband and two children. After two decades in journalism, she pivoted to fiction in her forties, drawing on her mother's death as a teenager to write her debut novel, When She Was Ours, out August 1 and available for pre-order now.On the episode, Anna spoke candidly about how losing her mother to illness at 17 left her without language for contradictory feelings — sadness alongside relief, love alongside loneliness — that no one had told her were normal. She described how becoming a mother gave her new insight into her own mother as a person, and how writing the novel became a way of reconnecting with that memory. She also discussed her fascination with sibling relationships and happy families under pressure as underexplored fiction territory, citing Little Women as an inspiration, and credited journalism with helping her write authentic scenes beyond her own experience. She closed by calling writing a healing, cathartic act, echoing the episode's themes of grief and growth.Connect with Anna Nordberg:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramBook: Anna Nordberg - When She Was OursLet's Connect: WebsiteLinkedInFacebookInstagramTwitterPinterestThe Grief and Happiness AllianceBook: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief

What do you want? Listen to this to see how to get that!Let's Connect:You can join the Grief and Happiness Alliance which meets weekly on Sundays by clicking hereYou can order the International Best Selling The Grief and Happiness Guide by clicking here.You can order Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief by clicking here at Amazon:You can listen to my podcast, Grief and Happiness, by clicking hereRequest your Awaken Your Happiness Journaling Guide hereSee acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Episode 446 of Grief and Happiness is for anyone who's wished a moment of grief or gratitude could last. Author Erica Gerard Di Bona shares how a typewriter and a thousand letters a year have helped her comfort grieving friends and reconnect with a stranger whose life her note changed. Her candid advice on condolences shows why a letter really is better.In This Episode, You Will Learn:(00:57) Erica's mission to bring back civility, one letter at a time(02:36) How grief after losing her husband led Emily to a year of weekly letters(09:44) Why a letter can reach people carrying hidden grief(10:49) Erica's advice to stop dancing around the word "death"(18:02) Small ways to stay connected — jokes, clippings, and horoscopes(21:02) The letter that resurfaced nine months later and changed a stranger's life(27:23) Erica's "secret weapon" for meetings: typed letters as a UC Santa Cruz "friend raiser"(29:23) What to say — and never say — in a condolence letter(34:14) The century-old letters that revealed hidden family history(39:46) How one letter can turn someone into a lifelong letter writerErica Gerard Di Bona is a lifelong letter writer and author of A Letter Is Better! The Art of Thank You, which makes the case for handwritten notes as tools for connection and healing. A former producer in network news, kids' game shows, and documentaries, she now works as a fundraising consultant for UC Santa Cruz. She types roughly 1,000 letters a year on one of her seven typewriters, connecting her with correspondents like Henry Winkler. Erica lives in Los Angeles with her husband, producer Vin Di Bona, and their daughter.Erica joins Emily to explore letter writing as an antidote to grief and isolation. She shares how her practice has helped her comfort grieving friends, thank strangers for small kindnesses, and stay close to loved ones far away — including a tattoo artist who called nine months after receiving her note to say it pulled him back from despair. She and Emily also swap stories about century-old letters that revealed hidden family history, showing how a letter can outlast the moment it was written. Erica offers guidance on condolence notes, encouraging people to name death plainly and skip empty platitudes in favor of personal memories — framing letter writing as a small act of kindness that can ease someone's grief.Connect with Erica Gerard Di Bona:WebsiteLinkedInInstagramFacebookBook: Erica Gerard Di Bona - A Letter Is Better!: The Art of Thank YouLet's Connect: WebsiteLinkedInFacebookInstagramTwitterPinterestThe Grief and Happiness AllianceBook: Emily Thiroux Threatt - Loving and Living Your Way Through Grief