Father and Son Days

This week we spiral from West Ham appearing in popular culture (again) to crying with laughter at Dad’s Jack the Ripper “paint the picture” moment. We consider launching a spin-off podcast reviewing this podcast… then a sub-sub-podcast reviewing that. There’s a surprisingly heated debate about AI art (including bananas, urinals and scrolls we wish we hadn’t mentioned), a heartfelt Colour Guard update, and a deep dive into imaginary friends — including Somebody, Nobody, two badly behaved imaginary dogs, and Keith (who frankly needs sorting out). We round it all off with Chapter 7 of Dex Blinko, featuring a living toupee and growing suspicion about Dad Blinko’s secrets.

We promised a Talking Rubbish. We did not deliver a Talking Rubbish. Instead, we bring you a Pancake Day Special… because priorities. We dive into the history of pancakes (yes, actual facts), international versions from Blini to Swedish Raggmunk, and then descend into a full-blown debate about flat things after a clear misunderstanding of what this episode was supposed to be about. One of us researched Shrove Tuesday. The other explored flatness as a lifestyle. Expect IKEA trauma, stingrays described as “majestic sea pancakes”, phones getting flatter, sheds that still aren’t finished, and the questionable idea of posting pancakes through the Royal Mail. We wrap things up with a pancake-themed quiz.

This week we celebrate growth by receiving our first negative TikTok comment and immediately over-analysing it. There’s talk of new merch, Dad’s charity song commissions, and why Saturn might float if you had a big enough bath. We cover Saturn’s rings, moons, habitability (or lack of), radiation problems, future missions, and then completely derail everything with pistachios, a song about being ignored, and a ring-themed quiz that escalates from Lord of the Rings to ring pieces.

Conor wires his car like a man who’s watched three videos and gained full confidence. David pitches cars that won’t let you drive if you’re angry, bored, or “being a knob”. We talk Artemis, the backside of the Moon, insults that aren’t insults, and endure a surprisingly catchy song about a bathroom. Dex Blinko returns, Bucket of Mum wakes up, and things somehow get more complicated.

We start with Dad’s ears, anniversary flowers, and the bleak realisation that most men only receive flowers at their funerals, before hearing a genuinely horrific Christmas story involving crushed tablets, squash, and accidental laxatives. Then it’s on to hippos — whether they really count as predators, why they kill so many people, how they ended up roaming Colombia, and the time they lived in what is now London. We finish with a hippo song and a quiz that’s somehow both infuriating and David’s favourite thing we’ve ever done.

Talking Rubbish returns with Dad proudly revealing his 9th-place ranking in the East of England for red pesto purchases, immediately redefining what success looks like. Along the way we cover Storm Goretti, anniversary dinners, dashcams bought out of mild panic, concerns about Dad’s ears getting bigger, and a brand-new chapter of the Dex Blinko story written by Conor — featuring space toilets, strange alliances, and David’s new favourite phrase: Jug of Mum.

We sit down to discuss one of history’s most infamous unsolved murderers and somehow end up arguing about mic stands, paint on furniture, Nick Knowles’ suspicious longevity, and whether serial killers should just start podcasts instead. There’s an accidental art installation, a fully committed musical performance, a quiz that tests patience more than knowledge, and some surprisingly thoughtful moments about why we idolise murderers at all. Jack the Ripper is involved. So is absolutely everything else.

We sit down for our annual look back at the year that was, starting with Christmas, New Year confusion, and the strange limbo between them, before getting surprisingly serious about podcast statistics, listener numbers, and international reach. Using our entirely legitimate CREMBAG™ Framework, we conduct a full end-of-year performance review of ourselves, generously scoring almost everything as “exceeds expectations.” We round things off with a truly baffling 2025 news quiz, proving once again that reflection is optional but confidence is essential.