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Ferrari Brain, BMX Brakes: ADHD in the Digital World
Is the Internet Stealing Your Child's Brain? | Rory Birkbeck, SafeSurfer
What happens when a tech entrepreneur realises the very industry he works in is disproportionately harming neurodivergent kids like his own son?
Rory Birkbeck, co-founder and CEO of SafeSurfer, is one of New Zealand's leading voices on online safety. He's also a dad navigating life with an ADHD child. In this raw, honest, and eye-opening conversation, Rory joins Freddie to talk about what it's really like raising a child whose brain runs like a Ferrari with BMX bike brakes... and why the internet was built for exactly the wrong kind of kid.
In this episode, you'll hear:
š The moment Rory realised his son's ADHD wasn't a problem to fix...it was a gift to understand
š§ Why ADHD kids are disproportionately affected by online harm (and what's really going on behind the screen)
š« The stat that stopped Rory in his tracks: by age 10, ADHD children may have heard 10,000 more corrective statements than their neurotypical peers
š£The creator vs. consumer distinction that every parent needs to hear
ā¤ļøā𩹠Why "it's not that we don't trust our kids...it's that we don't trust the internet" might be the most important reframe of 2026
āļø Practical, real-world tips you can use tonight to create healthier tech boundaries at home
šāāļø What SafeSurfer's Kid-Safe Smartphone actually does...and why Rory built it
š Where online safety is heading, and what parents need to know about AI, legislation, and the fight for our children's attention
If you've ever wrestled with your child's iPad, worried about what they're watching, or wondered whether you're winning or losing the battle for their attention, this episode is for you. You can discover more about Safe Surfer here and connect with Rory here
>>>>>>>
EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, New Zealandās leading child Neurodevelopmental clinic.Ā We believe every family deserves to be an EPIC family with Extraordinary Parents and Incredible Children.
Discover more about our award-winning ADHD and ASD assessments, family therapy support, and our free tools and resources here: https://baypaediatrics.com/
Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard, and discover strength in neurodiversity.
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20. Owning Your Crown: From Tween to Teen Queen
42:58||Season 2, Ep. 20Giving tween queens the confidence to build a kingdom.For so many girls, the journey from childhood to teenage years doesn't feel like growing up. It feels like losing themselves. The body changes. The friendships get complicated. The social media comparisons start. And nobody ā not school, not mum, not anyone ā quite prepares them for what's really happening.Mariana Sala decided to change that.In this episode, you'll hear:š What the "tween years" actually areā¦and why this window between ages 7 and 12 is one of the most critical and overlooked stages of a girl's developmentšŖWhy body image issues are starting younger than ever, and what mums might be doing without realising that makes it worseā¤ļøā𩹠How neurodivergent girls experience this transition differentlyā¦and why masking, shame, and fitting in hit harder for themš¹The "Rose and Thorn" ritual that gets girls opening up about things they'd never say at homeš„ Why mum and daughter conflict at this age isn't a crisis, it's biology𤫠The double transition nobody talks about: when a daughter hits puberty at the same time mum hits midlifeš«¶ What dads can actually do, and why father-daughter time matters more than most dads realiseš Queen Language, the Glowing Bubble, and the Inner Compass: the tools Mariana gives girls to own their voice and protect their peaceIf you have a daughter, know a daughter, or were once a daughter who could have used someone in your corner during those uncertain in-between years, this conversation is for you.Discover more about Mariana and Tween To Teen Queen here and connect with Mariana directly on Instagram and LinkedIn----------------EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, New Zealandās leading child Neurodevelopmental clinic.Ā We believe every family deserves to be an EPIC family with Extraordinary Parents and Incredible Children.Discover more about our award-winning ADHD and ASD assessments, family therapy support, and our free tools and resources here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard, and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
19. Tough Times to Playtimes: The Healing Power of Play
36:38||Season 2, Ep. 19Stop Talking. Start PlayingWhat if the most powerful thing you could do for your struggling child wasn't another appointment, another assessment, or another parenting bookā¦but simply getting on the floor and playing with them?Melanie Gilbert-De Rios has spent 35 years working with children and families. She's a registered social worker, a child-centred play therapist, and a family therapist. Most importantly, she believes something that might just change the way you see your child forever: that play is not what children do instead of healing. Play IS how children heal.In this episode, you'll hear:š§ø What play therapy actually isā¦and why it's SO much more than toys in a roomš Why breakthroughs never happen in uncomfortable chairs in clinical rooms...and what to do insteadš§ The concept of Filial Family Therapyā¦and why psychologists once tried to ban it for being too powerfulšŖ How 30 minutes of protected, intentional play time each week can transform your relationship with your childš„ Why the behaviour you're seeing is just the tip of the iceberg...and what's really going on underneathš«£ The one thing most parents do that quietly teaches their kids NOT to take responsibility (Freddie is guilty as chargedā¦)ā¤ļøā𩹠Why empathy isn't something you teach a child, it's something they catch from youš The gift that matters more than Robux, more than screen time, and more than any toy in Mel's incredible playroomIf you've ever wondered whether your child is OK, whether you are OK, or whether things are ever going to feel less chaotic, this is a conversation you need to hear.Discover more about Mel and Play Therapy Tauranga here: https://www.playtherapytauranga.co.nz/>>>>>>>EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, New Zealandās leading child Neurodevelopmental clinic.Ā We believe every family deserves to be an EPIC family with Extraordinary Parents and Incredible Children.Discover more about our award-winning ADHD and ASD assessments, family therapy support, and our free tools and resources here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard, and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
18. Stronger Than The System: Mum on a Mission
40:49||Season 2, Ep. 18She Almost Lost Everything. Then She Built a Village.What do you do when the system fails your child?When Lisa Cowan's son Luca was five, he was being sent out of class almost every day. She had no idea. It wasn't until a little girl in his class asked, "So Luca, are you going to stay in class today?" that Lisa found out what was really happening. What followed was years of waitlists, wrong turns, stand-downs, and moments so dark that Lisa didn't know if she could keep going.But she did. And what she built on the other side will move you.In this episode, you'll hear:š„ How Lisa fought the public system for years ā falling off waitlists, being told "that's just normal" ā until she finally got Luca the diagnosis that changed everything.š«¶ Why she started It Takes a Village Papamoaā¦and how 56 local businesses showed up before she even had an audienceš ļø The LEGO moment that told her the medication was workingš§ Why lived experience might be more powerful than any parenting courseš The school assembly that made her cryā¦four years in the makingš§© Her vision for one place where neurodivergent families can come and never feel like a numberā¤ļøā𩹠And the stat that should shock every parent: up to 95% of young people in the worst statistics ā crime, imprisonment, self-harm ā are diagnosed or undiagnosed ADHDThis is a raw, honest, and deeply human conversation about what it really looks like to fight for your child when no one else will. It's about shame, exhaustion, isolationā¦and the extraordinary things that happen when you simply refuse to give up.Connect with Lisa on Facebook: It Takes a Village Papamoa here.>>>>>>EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, New Zealandās leading child Neurodevelopmental clinic.Ā Discover more about our award-winning ADHD and ASD assessments, family therapy support, and our free tools and resources here: https://baypaediatrics.com/We believe every family deserves to be an EPIC family with Extraordinary Parents and Incredible Children.Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard, and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
16. Fighting The Good Fight
42:10||Ep. 16When youāre a parent of a neurodivergent child, there are times when life can feel impossible. But our truly EPIC guest, Mary-Jane du Toit, is living proof that NOTHING is impossible.Mary-Jane is a mum of a neurodiverse family and founder of Spectrum Connections - a charitable trust that provides peer support for families who have a child or teen that has Autism, Aspergers, ADHD, ADD or any other form of neurodiversity.In this open, honest and truly inspirational podcast which is jam-packed with insights and wisdom, Mary-Jane reveals:š§ What it feels like to be in it for āthe long haulā and how the neurodiversity diagnosis of her sons became a āgatewayā to her mission of helping the world become a better place for neurodiverse families.š How her sonās behaviours at school and kindergarten started to lay a trail of clues that something was different about his development, which led to an autism diagnosis.š„ Nothing will ever be ānormalā again - The pain that parents can go through when their child receives a neurodiversity diagnosis.šŗļø How āthe neurodiversity journeyā doesnāt end with a diagnosisā¦in fact, itās only the beginning. However, it also gives parents the opportunity to embrace their childās uniqueness.š The cycle of family change and how it can help parents deal with anger, frustration, overwhelm and the other emotions that arise when parenting a neurodiverse child.š When you're on the parenting journey, how to know when to āpush throughā...and when to ask for help.Plus, youāll discover MJās secretā¦š”When it feels like the world is against you, how to remember, āthis is a bad moment, not a bad lifeā>>>>>Ā EPIC Families is about creating Extraordinary Parents & Incredible Children. EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, one of New Zealandās leading child neurodiversity clinics. Discover more here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard and discover strength in neurodiversity.Get your hands on our free resources and guides to give your family the tools to thrive here
15. Neurodiversity: There Is A Future
39:45||Ep. 15Education is such an important part of every childās life. But for too many neurodiverse families, school is where they feel overlooked and overwhelmed. However, one school in the Bay of Plenty, New Zealand is fighting for every child to get the specialised learning support they deserve, so they can create a future to thrive in.This special episode of the EPIC Families Podcast features Mary Woods, Principal of Matahui School in Katikati. She has created a unique education framework that embraces each childās unique qualities and strengths, celebrates neurodiversity, and aims to build positive self-esteem and a love of learning.Ā Right now, the schoolās future is under threat from a number of political and economic challenges, so we are joining this mission to protect the educational future of neurodiverse children.Mary also reveals:š The difficulties that neurodiverse children face in everyday schooling, and how these challenges can show up.šµāš« Why schooling can be so overwhelming for children, and the impacts that can arise if neurodiversity doesnāt get identified early.š Tests arenāt everything - why a teacher building a strong relationship with the child can be the most powerful way to understand what is really happening.š The one thing every school needs to change in order to improve the learning outcomes of your child.šŗ How being out in nature can have a powerful impact on regulating a childās emotions and enhancing their learning.š«¶ The secret to helping children overcome trauma and confidence issues so they can feel safe and secure.PLUSā¦šÆ The #1 education TRAVESTY in New Zealand and elsewhere that schools need to fix IMMEDIATELYBay Paediatrics is also supporting the Matahui School Fundraising event on July 26. If you are in the Bay of Plenty we highly recommend you join us for Conversations & Bubbles! Tickets available here: https://events.humanitix.com/conversations-and-bubbles>>>>>Ā EPIC Families is about creating Extraordinary Parents & Incredible Children. EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, one of New Zealandās leading child neurodiversity clinics. Discover more here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
14. Neurodiversity: Making The Magic Happen
38:54||Ep. 14How do you remain calm and composed when trying to manage a neurospicy family, AND youāre a parent with ADHD?Ā It can feel like an impossible taskā¦but weāve found the neurosuperstar who has cracked the parenting code. Meet Jo Fallowfield, an Occupational Therapist and a mum with ADHD who heads up a neurodiverse family of four.In this thrilling, honest and open episode of EPIC Families, you will discover how neurodiversity can be the thing that brings your family together.Jo revealsā¦šŗļø How feeling ādifferent from the normā an early age and āstumbling through lifeā as she grew up paved the pathway to her own ADHD diagnosis.ā”ļø The āADHD differenceā felt so strongly by so many children and their parentsā¦and the power of ādifferenceā being the one thing that neurodiverse families have in common.š The challenges of getting professionals to ālistenā especially when her children didnāt fit the ānormalā description of ADHD.š The power of persistence and how to keep going when it feels like schools and teachers are just labelling your child as ānaughtyā and refusing to listen when you say they need more help.𤫠The secret to creating empathy and understand in a household that can feel chaotic and overwhelmingā¦especially when emotions are not āone size fits allāā¤ļø How to talk to your children about ADHD and neurodiversity.PLUSš The joys of being a neurodiverse household and how ADHD can unlock the very BEST of your parenting talents.>>>>>Ā EPIC Families is about creating Extraordinary Parents & Incredible Children. EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, one of New Zealandās leading child neurodiversity clinics. Discover more here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
13. The Overwhelmed Parent
24:38||Ep. 13From Overwhelmed to Empowered ā The Real Truth About Parenting ConfidenceIn this powerful and deeply personal episode of the EPIC Families podcast, Freddie Bennett gets raw and real about something every parent of a neurodiverse child has faced: Overwhelm.If youāve ever felt like youāre failing as a parentā¦If youāve ever found yourself saying, āI should be betterā¦āIf the mental load, school stress, guilt, and emotional rollercoaster of parenting a child with ADHD or Autism has you running on empty ā this episode is for you.Freddie shares his own story as a dad with ADHD, the shame spiral so many parents find themselves in, and why we often let overwhelm hold us back from the confident, connected parenting we dream of.Youāll discover:š«£ The 4 hidden drivers of parenting overwhelm (L.I.F.E.)šØ The 8 ways overwhelm shows up in everyday life ā from procrastination to perfectionismšŖ Why confidence isnāt a mystery... itās a muscle you build by keeping promises to yourselfš§ How to shift your mindset from crisis to clarity ā and finally feel like youāre back in controlThis is more than just a podcast ā itās a wake-up call, a mirror, and a warm hug for every parent who feels like theyāre not enough.>>>>>Ā EPIC Families is about creating Extraordinary Parents & Incredible Children. EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, New Zealandās child neurodiversity centre of excellence. Discover more here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ
12. ADHD: In It Together
45:12||Ep. 12ADHD can feel overwhelming at times. As an ADHD adult or a parent of a neurodiverse child, there are days when the struggle feels impossible. Whether itās dealing with emotional meltdowns, rejection, self-sabotage or workplaces & schools that just donāt āget itā, ADHD aināt easy.But you are NEVER aloneā¦and the story told by this weekās guest proves it. We were delighted to welcome Neal Mankey, Chair of ADHD UK, neurodiversity champion and a father who was diagnosed with ADHD in his early 40s.Ā In this raw, open and honest episode of the EPIC Families podcast, Neal reveals how ADHD doesnāt have to be a tripwireā¦it can be the missing piece of the puzzle:šŗļø The personal journey of undiagnosed ADHD in his younger years that went from āhyperactive kidā to school-leaver with zero qualifications to jumping from job to job and struggling with mental health and alcohol challenges.š How an ADHD diagnosis can help to explain the aspects of our lives that weāve struggled with for so long, and trigger a vast range of positive lifestyle changes.ā ļø The shocking statistics highlighting the links between ADHD and mental illness in young people and adults, and the strategies that can be put in place to help.š Why āletting goā can be the secret to dealing with ADHD-related challenges, and how vulnerability can be your greatest strength.ā¤ļø The importance of creating environment that offer psychological safety and the acceptance to allow people to let their authentic strengths shine.š How to help your children thrive in a learning environment, and why ābeing their authentic selvesā may be easy to talk aboutā¦but almost impossible to achieve.PLUS, Neal reveals:šŖ How he discovered the secret āconfidence to not conformā in the most unlikely of places.>>>>>Ā EPIC Families is about creating Extraordinary Parents & Incredible Children. EPIC Families is part of Bay Paediatrics, one of New Zealandās leading child neurodiversity clinics. Discover more here: https://baypaediatrics.com/Join the free EPIC Families community here. Be seen, be heard and discover strength in neurodiversity.Follow us on Instagram and FacebookĀ