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Emotionally Intelligent Parenting with Stephanie Pinto
3: How to Encourage an Apology (using Emotional Intelligence)
Should you make your child say sorry when they hurt another? Or do it later on when the 'action' has died down? Is it really necessary to explicitly teach apologising? So many questions!
Teaching your child to reconcile things when they've hurt someone's feelings or done the wrong thing, is a crucial part of their social and emotional development. Yes, we do need to encourage kids to take responsibility for their actions, empathize with others, and mend relationships. But how?
In this episode, I share effective strategies for teaching kids to apologise sincerely and meaningfully.
If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions!
Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are 100,000 parents in the community! š
ā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids
Hi! I am a certified Emotional Intelligence parent author, coach and speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping kids, parents and educators use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives!
Book a FREE 30 min consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements.
š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.com
Or stalk me on the socials...
Insta: @emotionally.intelligent.parent
FB: fb.com/stephpinto
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76. 76: The Legendary Alfie Kohn on Time-Outs, Accidental Manipulation and 'Motivating' Kids.
34:09||Season 2, Ep. 76Ok - big moment you guys. Iām excited (and somewhat embarrassed!) to share this special conversation with youāone that originally aired back in 2022 in my Facebook community Let's Raise Emotionally Intelligent Kids.Looking back, I canāt help but cringe! I was SO nervous and excited to be speaking with the universal expert on parenting, education, and human behaviour: Alfie Kohn.Letās just say I wasnāt as polished or professional as I am nowā¦ but the insights and wisdom? Theyāre just as powerful today as they were then.Alfie Kohn, renowned author of Punished by Rewards, No Contest, The Homework Myth, and my personal favourite, Unconditional Parenting, (plus many others!) brings his groundbreaking research and passion for progressive education to this chat.In this episode, we dive into:š Why rewards can be just as harmful as punishments for children.š” What people really mean when they say, "I want to motivate my child" (spoiler: itās often about compliance).š The hidden problems with praiseāespecially those high-pitched, "good job!" moments.š« The true impact of time-outs and forcible isolation on kidsā emotional well-being.One of the most profound ideas we explored? The belief that we need to reinforce kids to behave a certain way. This comes from a hidden assumption that children arenāt naturally inclined to do well on their ownāand itās time we rethink that.Iām so grateful Alfie agreed to let me share this conversation here on the podcastāitās one you wonāt want to miss.*** If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions! Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are over 130,000 parents in the community! šā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto75. 75: The Truth About Rewards, Stars, Stickers, and Points with Megg Thompson
52:21||Season 2, Ep. 75Are We Training Kids to Perform? The Truth About Rewards, Behaviour & Connection with Megg Thompson.Weāve all used themāsticker charts, gold stars, rewards for good behaviour. But what if these systems arenāt actually helping kids grow? What if theyāre just training them to comply? (And then when we're not around, they stop "performing" because the motivation was never really theirs to begin with...)In this episode, I sit down with Megg Thompson, a former Kindergarten teacher turned neuro-affirming Certified Behavior Consultant and Life Coach, to unpack the real impact of rewards and compliance-based parenting and teaching.We dive into:āØ Why kids "hold it together" at school but melt down at homeāØ The hidden problems with reward charts and behavior incentivesāØ Why compliance shouldnāt be the goalāand what to focus on insteadāØ How traditional discipline alienates neurodivergent and struggling kidsāØ What actually works to build cooperation, trust, and connectionMegg brings her signature humour and deep insight to a conversation that will challenge what you think you know about kidsā behaviour.Also, she made me keep in the drunk-squirrel moments she and I had around 22-23 min mark - enjoy listening to us rack our brains when she lost her train of thought!If you're ready to shift from power-over to partnership, ditch the rewards, and start building real, lasting connection with your kidsāthis episode is a must-listen.Find Megg Thompson here:http://www.instagram.com/meggthompsonbehaviorhttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCn5Q6ZPasX6ebCZ59ClM4qwhttps://meggthompson.com/*** If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions! Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are over 130,000 parents in the community! šā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto74. 74: A Little Rant (The Double Standards in Emotional Intelligence)
10:33||Season 2, Ep. 74We all want our kids to be emotionally intelligent, right? Buuut are we actually teaching it in a way that helps them thrive?In this episode, I let loose a mini-rant (sorry not sorry) about some common myths and misconceptions that are sending mixed messages about emotions to our kids - without us even realising it.š¤ We tell kids to ācalm downā when theyāre upset, but do we always model calmness when everything goes wrong?š¤ We expect them to āuse their words,ā but are we showing them how?š¤ The truth is, emotional intelligence isnāt just something we teach... itās something our kids learn from us.Join me as I share simple, powerful ideas that can help us guide our kids through big emotions, build REAL connection, and create a home where feelings are understood, not shut down.No guilt, no pressure. Just an honest chat (aka rant) about how we can show up as the emotional leaders our kids need.Letās rethink the way we teach emotional intelligence - starting today. šShare with someone you know might find this helpful or insightful!Steph.***Welcome to the Emotionally Intelligent Parenting podcast,Iām Stephanie Pinto. Iām an Aussie mum of 2, a best-selling author, international speaker and award-winning coachā¦ And I love all things Emotional Intelligence and parenting.Although weāre far from perfect as parents and our kids still have big emotions from time to time, meltdowns are few and far between.Compassion, listening and problem-solving are our go-to strategies when things go sideways, and our home is a really nice place to be.Oh and, our house is a punishment-free zone!!Weāre only able to do all of this because weāve learnt to handle our own emotions, we understand our kidsā emotions and behaviour, and we work together to solve problems as a team.If you have caught some of the episodes I've recorded with my husband Alex, go back to these episodes:Ep 54: Parenting on the Same Page: My Husbandās Journey into Emotional Intelligence.Ep 60: How We Failed As New Parents with Steph and Alex.Ep 64: When Meltdowns Turn Physical - Handling Hitting, Throwing, Kicking, And Keeping Your Cool.Follow me on Insta @emotionally.intelligent.parentHave you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are 130,000+ parents in the community! š https://www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! Iām an award-winning Emotional Intelligence parenting consultant, best-selling author and international speaker. Iām also a paediatric anxiety therapist and I love helping kids, parents and educators use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives!Book a FREE 30 min consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements.š” Head to https://www.stephaniepinto.com/ Or stalk me on the socials...Insta: https://www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parent/FB: fb.com/stephpintoFB Business: fb.com/stephaniepintoeqcoach73. 73: Soulful Single Parenting: How to Thrive as a Solo Parent with Dr. Gila.
38:35||Season 2, Ep. 73Parenting is always challenging, but doing it solo comes with its own set of unique hurdles that can feel utterly overwhelming at times. In this episode, I chat with the amazing Dr. Gila - a single parent coach, psychologist, neuropsychologist, and a single mum whoās been through it all.We dig into why single parents need supportive spaces (no one should have to do this alone) and explore the unique challenges and unexpected joys of raising kids solo.Dr. Gila gets real about the pressure to be perfect and why letting go of that myth can be one of the best gifts you give yourself and your kids.And letās get into the buzzword of the moment: self-care. Dr. Gila introduces her practical āsink modelā for managing emotions, showing us why itās not about the one drop that overflows but the build-up that leads to it.Learn how to spot when your sink is filling up and what true self-care looks like when youāre already stretched thin.If youāre a single parent or know someone who is, this episode is packed with insights, practical tips, and the reassurance that youāre not in this alone.We can tackle the messy, beautiful chaos of single parentingātogether.š©·š©·š©· DR. GILA'S SINGLE PARENTING SUMMIT IS NOW LIVE! 10-12 Feb, 2025.Your free ticket is here:https://qnghcne02w.krtra.com/t/G34pWzhLgTrKWeb: www.drgilaparenting.com Email: info@drgilaparenting.comIG: www.instagram.com/drgila_parentingFB: www.facebook.com/drgilaparenting/Free resources: PDF GUIDE: Tantrums, & Meltdowns, & Rages...Oh My! The single parent's guide to understanding challenging behaviours (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/SP_tantrum_signup)AUDIO: Guided Meditation for Single Parents (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/SP_meditation)VIDEO: What Every Parent Needs to Know When the S**T Hits the Fan. (https://www.drgilaparenting.com/3truths)72. 72: Stop Being Hijacked By Your Emotions: 10 Lessons in Emotional Intelligence Every Parent Needs to Know.
41:46||Season 2, Ep. 72Most of us were never taught how to handle our emotions... we were just told to "calm down" or "stop overreacting."But hereās the truth: all emotions are okay, not all behaviour is. And as parents, the way we handle our emotions directly shapes how our kids learn to manage theirs.Today on the Emotionally Intelligent Parenting podcast, Iām sharing 10 powerful lessons about emotions:How to work with them instead of against them, how to stop stress from taking over, and how to develop the emotional intelligence you need to parent with confidence, calm, and connection. Stop taking things personally, stop believing there are bad emotions, and stop thinking your kids' emotions are out of control (even when it really seems like they are!)Because letās be real... if we donāt learn to handle our emotions, theyāll handle us. š«£ššš I forgot to mention my upcoming Emotional Intelligence for People-Pleasers live class - it's in February, tickets via my Facebook Community, link below.šļø Here: https://www.facebook.com/share/1WiQyUxynD/I mentioned my Emotional Intelligence courses for parents and educators, here are a few of them:Introduction to Raising Emotionally Intelligent KidsSupporting Anxious KidsFrom Reactive to Responsive Parenting: Stop the Yelling with Emotional IntelligenceEFT Tapping: Overcoming Stress and Strong Emotions RapidlyFrom Blowups to Balance: Supporting ADHD Kidsā All available at www.stephaniepinto.com/courses*** If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions! Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are over 130,000 parents in the community! šā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto71. 71: Tough Kids vs. Snowflakes: The Science of Raising Resilient Humans with Tim Curtis.
43:23||Season 2, Ep. 71šŖ Are some people just naturally more resilient? Or is resilience something we can actually build? And what if weāve been thinking about stress and adversity all wrong when it comes to raising kids?Today on the Emotionally Intelligent Parenting Podcast, Iām joined by Tim Curtisāformer Aussie SAS Squadron Commander, resilience expert, and co-author of The Resilience Shield. Tim has spent years leading high-stakes military operations, consulting for the UN, and now helping people understand what actually makes us resilient.And trust me, his insights will challenge everything you thought you knew. Sorry!We speak about:š” The science of resilienceāhow much is genetic, and how much can we change?āļø Why kids actually need some stress and adversity to grow strongerš The downside of helicopter and bulldozer parentingš” The key factors that build resilience: mindset, social connections, and physical healthAlso heās given us all free access to his online resilience assessment you can take today!Tim brings fascinating research, real-life stories, and game-changing insights on how to help both ourselves and our kids become more resilient.If you want to raise strong, adaptable, and confident kids (and build your own resilience while youāre at it), this episode is a must-listen! š§āØFind out more about Tim and his work at:www.mettle.globalwww.resilienceshield.comwww.linkedin.com/in/tim-curtis-64b8581***70. 70: Permission to Feel: Busting the Biggest Myths About Emotional Intelligence with Prof. Marc Brackett
32:21||Season 2, Ep. 70Is emotional intelligence making kids āsoftā? Or is it actually the secret to raising strong, resilient humans? š¤And hereās another big question ā are some emotions ābad,ā or do they all serve a purpose? Todayās guest is here to set the record straightā and he does it with brains, humour, and a whole lot of real talk!In this wildly insightful (and surprisingly hilarious) conversation, I chat with Professor Marc Brackett, the founding director of Yaleās Centre for Emotional Intelligence and author of Permission to Feel. We talk about:š Marcās childhood & the mentor who changed his lifeāļø Why EI isnāt about raising āsnowflakesāš¬ What it means to be an āemotion scientistāš” How parents can teach emotional intelligenceāeven if they werenāt raised that wayš„ Handling your own emotions when your kids are losing itMarc is real, funny, and super smart, and this episode will leave you rethinking everything you thought you knew about emotions.Ready to dial up your emotional intelligence in 30 min with us? Letās dive in! š§āØFind out more about Prof. Marc Brackett, his webcast (here on YT!), emotions app, his renowned RULER method and more at:YT: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCRA3Ffn23Cl8W4xyev6EGIwWeb: https://marcbrackett.com/IG: https://www.instagram.com/marc.brackett/š„³ And don't forget to check out my self-paced online Emotional Intelligence courses at www.stephaniepinto.com/courses***If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions! Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are over 130,000 parents in the community! šā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto69. 69: Fast-Track Your Emotional Intelligence: Lessons I Learned the Hard Way (So You Donāt Have To)
30:54||Season 2, Ep. 69Today Iām sharing the hard-earned lessons that have completely transformed my parenting, marriage, and overall outlook on life. If youāve ever felt like emotional intelligence is valuable but complicated or time-consuming to master, this episode is for you!I share with you some pretty personal (and profound) shifts:ā The things Iāve stopped stressing overālike perfectionism, guilt, and controlāand how this shift has freed up my energy for what truly matters.ā How Iāve tackled my anxiety head-on and the tools I use to stay calm in high-stress moments.ā The conflicts I no longer have in parenting and marriage, thanks to replacing blame with curiosity and knowing when to pick my battles.ā A fresh perspective on parentingāseeing big emotions as opportunities to connect, not punish, and embracing the messy, imperfect moments.ā How I see my husband through a new lens, respecting his "blueprint" and working as a team without forcing change or taking things personally.Plus, Iāll share the mindset shifts and practical strategies that have fast-tracked my emotional intelligence, so you can skip the trial-and-error and start building stronger, more connected relationships today.Whether youāre navigating tantrums, tackling disagreements, or trying to stop spiraling into guilt, this episode is packed with insights and tools to help you thrive. š± Tune in now to learn how to fast-track your emotional intelligence journeyāwithout all the stress and second-guessing!If you are ready to take the next small step in your journey, JOIN ME in an online course! Here's why:š Flexible Access: You can learn anytime, anywhere, whether at home or on the go.š Self-Paced Learning: Complete courses at your own speed, fitting lessons into your schedule.š Stop and Start: Pause lessons when life gets busy and pick up where you left off.š Cost-Effective: Always more affordable than private coaching, saving time and costs.š Wide Variety of Resources: Access videos, worksheets, and interactive content to suit your learning style.š» Find my emotionally intelligent parenting courses at https://www.stephaniepinto.com/courses*** Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: www.instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto68. 68: Early Warning Signs: How to Spot Dysregulation in Your Kids.
36:11||Season 2, Ep. 68Today I'm sharing about the fascinating (and sometimes baffling) world of early warning signs of dysregulation in kids. Have you ever noticed your child getting overly silly, suddenly antagonizing their sibling, or making strange noises like growling or hissing? These little quirks arenāt random. Theyāre often signs that your child is beginning to feel emotionally overwhelmed or out of sync. When you learn to recognise these subtle cues, you can step in with calm and supportive strategies that help prevent meltdowns, build connection, and teach emotional resilience.Plus, a special guest makes an unexpected appearance! My daughter video-bombs the intro with some dance moves and plenty of giggles, so if youāre watching on YouTube, youāre in for a treat. You're welcome ;)(Watch at youtube.com/c/StephaniePinto)Tune in to learn the signs of emotional overwhelm by finding clues in your child's (frustrating) behaviour.*** If this resonates with you, I'd love to hear from you. Email us at hello@stephaniepinto.com and send me your thoughts, feedback or questions! Have you joined my Facebook Group for parents? There are over 130,000 parents in the community! šā”ļø www.facebook.com/groups/letsraiseemotionallyintelligentkids Hi! I am an Emotional Intelligence best-selling author, award-winning coach and international speaker. I'm also a paediatric anxiety therapist (and previous speech language pathologist!) and I love helping people use emotional intelligence to become calmer, more connected and live happier lives! Book a consult with me to discuss coaching, support, collaborations or speaking engagements. š” Head to www.stephaniepinto.comOr stalk me on the socials...Insta: instagram.com/emotionally.intelligent.parentFB: fb.com/stephpinto