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Can't Get Any Worse Podcast
Ep. 233 "Cock Ring Poetry"
Ep. 233
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This week on Can't Get Any Worse Podcast:
Steph Curry accidentally turns me into a basketball genius, Westy gets traumatised over fake Lego mini-figs, my new Crocs may have saved my life, and the fake Tech Deck curse from my childhood returns in devastating fashion.
Plus:
- Weird horny TikToks somehow get worse
- Backwoods Brenda sells vibrators to the internet
- I realise I might need to start grinding again
- 4 Pines Cooly comedy recap
- Shane Gillis absolutely destroys the Kevin Hart roast
- MVP MMA finally goes down
- Francis Ngannou chaos
- Dana White being petty again
- Ronda Rousey returns
- Nate Diaz bleeds everywhere
And somehow we also discuss:
cookie cock-ring poetry, casual sex TikToks, Crocs technology, fake Lego economics, and why one neighbourhood kid nearly got banned from my front yard.
#ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #UFC #MMA #ShaneGillis #KevinHart #FrancisNgannou #NateDiaz #RondaRousey #Basketball #StephCurry #AustralianComedy #JimmyMissen #Netflix #MagicRound
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240. Ep. 240 "Stroke it To Me"
39:07||Ep. 240This week on the podcast we're covering everything from Toy Story 5 nearly making me cry in front of my father-in-law, to Westy discovering that everyone is apparently born on their birthday. We also launched our new family trading card business, I explain why my son thinks gardeners aren't real tradies, and I tell the story of the most inspirational comedian in Australia who lost his job and decided to ride a pushbike around the country doing stand-up.In comedy, it's back to the trenches with tiny open mic rooms, testing brand-new material and remembering why I fell in love with stand-up in the first place.Plus, I review Netflix's insane Mother's Instinct, revisit two of the funniest movies ever made (21 & 22 Jump Street), and talk about the heartbreaking Dustin Poirier airport incident that's got the MMA world talking.Oh... and of course, the internet continues to prove that no matter how weird your week was... Turns Out It Can Get Worse.#Podcast #ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #AustralianComedy #JimmyMissen #Comedy #FunnyStories #Parenting #DadLife #ToyStory5 #Netflix #JumpStreet #UFC #DustinPoirier #MMA #TradingCards #PokemonCards #LifeStories #TurnsOutItCanGetWorse #ComedyReels
239. Ep. 239 "Big Bad Dad Bod"
51:03||Ep. 239This week on the podcast, school holidays are in full swing, the front yard is finally (almost) finished, and I'm officially retiring from being a builder before another DIY project destroys my knees.We dive into the local corner shop worker who's somehow become my therapist, the awkward moment I mistook a workmate's family member for an Uber Eats driver, and our first high school tour for Westy, which quickly turned into one of the most uncomfortable experiences of my life.There's also a trip to a snow day event where I got assaulted by ice cubes, a rant about rich people needing "seasonal clothing", and another round of internet weirdos proving that no matter how bad things get... they can always get worse.In comedy this week, we hit the Newmarket Hotel, Madocke Brewing, and Warehouse 25, including one gig where a 10-year-old accidentally became part of the act and another where the new material absolutely came to life.Plus, thoughts on the new MGK & Honestav album, why "Crash First" is stuck in my head, and the realization that we're officially entering Conor McGregor fight month.As always, stupidity, questionable life advice, and internet degenerates included at no extra charge.#JimmyMissen #TheJimmyMissenPodcast #ComedyPodcast #AustralianComedy #StandUpComedy #ComedianLife #SchoolHolidays #DadLife #ParentingFail #DIYDisaster #SnowDay #ComedyLife #BrisbaneComedy #AussieHumour #ConorMcGregor #UFC #MMA #Honestav #MGK #PodcastLife #FunnyStories #InternetWeirdos #KnuckleBet #ComedyClips #WeeklyWrapUp
238. Ep. 238 "Local Streetball Legend"
53:18||Ep. 238This week I discover that trusting a nine-year-old with greyhound tips is apparently NOT a viable retirement strategy, Westy wraps up basketball season by scoring nearly every point for his team, and I somehow suffer a potentially career-ending injury while taking a free throw.We also dive into a bizarre crypto scam, my weekend from hell laying pavers, Nikita informing me that TRT has turned my head into the moon, and another collection of internet weirdos that prove once again... it can always get worse.In comedy, I perform to a crowd of THREE people at Jungle Bar, survive Camp Hill Bowls Club, and keep tinkering with the home invasion story ahead of the solo show.Then we wrap things up with the Knicks finally breaking their championship drought, some wild NBA off-season rumours, and a full UFC White House recap recorded immediately after the event.Gamble responsibly. Stretch before free throws. And please leave Buzz Lightyear out of your cult rituals.#ComedyPodcast #AustralianComedy #StandUpComedy #ComedianLife #DadLife #BasketballDad #TRTJourney #CryptoScam #NBAFinals #NewYorkKnicks #JalenBrunson #UFC #UFCCard #BrisbaneComedy #FunnyPodcast #WeeklyWrap #ComedyLife #AussiePodcast #ParentingFails #ComedyReels #PodcastClips #TurnsOutItCanGetWorse
237. Ep. 237 "UFC Freedom 250 Breakdown"
36:44||Ep. 237This week we're breaking down the most ridiculous card Dana White has ever put together, UFC Freedom 250 live from the White House.We've got Ilia Topuria defending the lightweight title against Justin Gaethje, Alex Pereira chasing history against Ciryl Gane for interim heavyweight gold, Sean O'Malley looking to get back on track, Michael Chandler trying to stop the Mauricio Ruffy hype train, and Derrick Lewis doing Derrick Lewis things against undefeated prospect Josh Hokit.We're also talking the White House lawsuit trying to shut the event down, Joe Rogan questioning whether fighting outdoors is a terrible idea, Arman Tsarukyan allegedly dropping a million bucks on Gaethje, Tom Aspinall still stuck on the sidelines while Dana and Eddie Hearn trade shots, and whether Pereira becoming a three-division champion completely breaks every GOAT debate forever.Plus we go through every fight on the card, give our picks, best underdogs, and reveal this week's Can't Bet Any Worse multi.Got a story, question or submission for the pod? Hit us up on Instagram or email cantgetanyworsepod@gmail.comJimmy MissenFacebook – CantGetAnyWorsePodcastInstagram – @cantgetanyworsepodcastYouTube – CantGetAnyWorsePodcastTikTok – @cantgetanyworsepodcast#CantGetAnyWorse #UFCFreedom250 #UFC #MMA #IliaTopuria #JustinGaethje #AlexPereira #CirylGane #SeanOMalley #TomAspinall #DanaWhite #MMApodcast #UFCBets #ComedyPodcast #WhiteHouseCard
236. Ep. 236 "Blow Through Your Bush"
58:27||Ep. 236This week on the pod, Westy receives a school award and rewards my support by asking me what the hell I'm doing there, I discover some parents genuinely believe their kids don't swear, and I nearly amputate my pinky finger in a brutal battle with a wheelie bin.Parker turns six, our family proves once again that nobody knows how to navigate without me, and Nanny buys Westy a pair of basketball shoes so fancy they come with their own backstory, accessories and possibly a mortgage.Plus a full TRT update after my latest blood tests, an encounter with two gym NPCs fighting over a rope attachment, a surprise casino gig that gave me hope for the solo show, and a charity MC spot that has me wondering how many cancer jokes is exactly zero too many.Also featured this week: fart girl, bush hair lady, donut guy, the roundest head ever seen on the internet, UFC betting wins, Saddle Club nostalgia, and a woman who blamed me for the location of a public toilet.Business as usual. 🍻#ComedyPodcast #StandUpComedy #AustralianComedy
235. Ep. 235 "Where Are My Tits?"
54:34||Ep. 235This week the boys survived sports carnival day, Westy started collecting silver medals like he's preparing for an Olympic sponsorship deal, and Westy somehow proved he's smarter than both me and ChatGPT during a homework meltdown.We also dive into the school photo disaster that turned into a full-scale hostage negotiation, a listener sends the boys an unreal collection of trading cards, and Parker delivers one of the greatest non-sequitur lines in podcast history: "Dad, I know how to read."On the comedy front, Lemak's gets cursed yet again, 10 Toes Brewery delivers an absolute belter of a crowd, and AlphaFest gave me the closest feeling yet to living out the stupidly unrealistic dream I've had since I started comedy.Plus Kevin Hart defends comedy, Desley Robinson keeps dominating world boxing, the NBA Finals storylines are absolute cinema, and I'm seriously considering putting together the first ever Can't Get Any Worse UFC watch party.As always, we finish by proving that yes... it can still get worse.#ComedyPodcast #AustralianComedy #StandUpComedy #DadLife #AlphaFest #NBAFinals #NRL #UFC #BrisbaneComedy #CantGetAnyWorsePodcast
234. Ep. 234 "Gently Used"
52:56||Ep. 234This week on the pod: a crackhead thanks me for funding his KFC and Woodstock addiction, another sponsor jumps on board, and Parker has somehow become obsessed with baseball overnight.We also dive into the terrifying experience of walking through a shopping centre carrying a baseball bat, why physio sessions feel like prison for gym addicts, getting financially assassinated at the school uniform shop, and how TRT has apparently turned me into a permanently shirtless suburban dad.Comedy-wise, we finally got a new joke to work at Mitzi’s… only to immediately bomb with it at Pago Pago in front of a bloke who got told I was his “favourite Brisbane comedian.” Absolute scenes.Plus:NBA playoffs addictionState of Origin chatTom Segura’s Bad Thoughts Season 2Fake Lego traumaMore cursed “Turns Out It Can Get Worse” clips from the depths of the internet#ComedyPodcast #AustralianComedy #StandUpComedy #ComedyPodcastAU #NRL #NBAPlayoffs #StateOfOrigin #TomSegura #ShaneGillis #KnuckleBet #KamikazeEnergy #BrisbaneComedy #AussiePodcast #DadComedy #ComedyReels
232. Ep. 232 "Mayonnaise Man"
01:03:18||Ep. 232This week the internet somehow gets worse with mayonnaise men, worm mothers and mysterious body hair trimmings, Parker gets absolutely prison jacked off a Kmart pull-up bar, learner drivers invade our street, and I attempt to turn ashtray coins into sports card millions. We also hit David Fleay Wildlife Park for Mother’s Day, talk podcast sponsors and monetisation, the Podcast Royale announcement, a huge return to the Orion Hotel comedy room, and one of the best UFC weeks we’ve had in years with Strickland, Pereira, Topuria and absolute chaos at the White House press conference.#ComedyPodcast #AustralianComedy #StandUpComedy #UFC #PodcastRoyale #SeanStrickland #TradingCards #SportsCards #BrisbaneComedy #ComedyClips #JimmyMissen #PodcastLife #FunnyPodcast #AussieComedy #MMA