Talking Istanbullocks Comedy Pubcast
All Episodes
86. Liam Gallagher and Liam Neeson Jump The Shark
23:15||Ep. 86In this wet and wild Turkish holiday edition of Talking Istanbullocks, Jorma Kirkko brings you celebrity banter, sharp-witted sketches, and some jaws-dropping shark facts. With guest appearances by Liam Neeson and Morgan Freedman.Highlights:Liam Neeson Returns: The iconic actor and raconteur chats about his latest project—a land shark horror film, "Jowls." Is it the next "Jaws" or something truly revolutionary? Liam shares his passion for this "completely original" concept, despite some uncanny similarities to a certain Spielberg classic.Ray Mac’s Trampoline Troubles: After some concerning behaviour involving a trampoline and a large breasted neighbour, Ray checks into the Dr. Brutus Himmler Institute of Psychiatology. We delve into the hilarious (and slightly disturbing) contents of his recent phone records.Oasis Reunion: With Oasis reuniting, Morgan Freedman reminisces about the wild days of the '90s with a cheeky poem, "Definitely Maybe," recounting backstage antics with the Gallagher brothers and Robbie Williams.Shark Facts & Puns Galore: From the terrifying speed of the shortfin mako to the bizarre reproductive habits of sharks, we dive into the deep with some fin-tastic facts..Support Independent Artists: Jorma gets real about the challenges of competing with corporate giants in the podcasting world. Hear why your support means everything to independent creators.Special Mentions: Big shoutout to Shark Magazine, Dr. Brutus Himmler, and our loyal listeners. Plus, find out how you can catch Jorma’s latest film, "Dangerous Stranger," on Drama Pops on iPhones.Don’t miss this episode packed with humour, nostalgia, and some seriously outlandish movie pitches. And remember, keep sharing the show on social media to help us keep the laughs coming!Hashtags/Keywords: #Britishcomedy IrishComedy #TrampolinePrankCall #JawsRemake #OasisReunion #LiamNeeson #PodcastHumour #IndependentCreators #SharkFacts #SharkPuns #ComedySketches #SupportIndie #LiamNeesonInterview #MorganFreedmanPoem #FuckJoeRogan #FuckTheBBCTRANSCRIPThttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1gplUY1hSYzBi8IZNABZ_ciZ6nxWMAf7qPoxnUZbzAD0/edit?usp=sharingMDMA in Cheese, A Woke Perspective on Thanksgiving and Psychic Predictions
43:41|In this laugh-packed episode of Talking Istanbullocks, the boys talk Istanbul cosmetic surgery and the dulcet tones of Morgan Freedman as he recites a poem on the curious trend of 'brieing'—yes, you heard that right, cheese takes centre stage in this ECSTATIC verse.Ray Mac brings True or False segment, where Willem Dafoe's willy plays a prominent part. The episode only gets funnier with a side-splitting sketch featuring Kaiden Stokes, who gets more than he bargained for when he invites a Native American guest to his Thanksgiving dinner. Expect awkward cultural misunderstandings, plenty of laughs, and a not-so-traditional holiday meal that takes an unexpected turn!Don't miss out on Honzie's Horoscopes and Psychic Predictions for August—where the future seems oddly familiar, and the stars have a wicked sense of humour. Tune in for a rollercoaster of comedy that covers everything from cheese rituals to offbeat astrology!#Britishcomedy #Irishcomedy #Brieing #MDMAinincheese #WillemDafoePenisSize #KaidenStokesWokeBloke #ComedySketch #IsThanksgivingRacist #SpoofHoroscopes #PsychicPredictions4oYou said:The Best School Prank Ever: The Ultimate Revenge Against A Conman
42:49|In the latest entertaining episode of the Talking Istanbullocks Comedy Pubcast, Jorma Kirkko, pub raconteur par excellence, takes the stage solo, sharing some of his most entertaining stories and tackling a wide array of questions from listeners.School Days Shenanigans: Jorma takes a trip down memory lane, recounting giving his maths teacher a nervous breakdown as a not so innocent 12 year old.Revenge: How did a loose pair of ladders in Fife lead to a chain of events that culminated in German-sourced gay pornography?Is Turkey or Malaysia more insane to live n? Jorma reveals where he would most love to settle down and why.Fim Release Update.How Well Does He Know Morgan Freeman?Is The Show As Funny As It Used To Be? With a laugh, Jorma tackles the question of whether the creative well is running dry.Should Ray Seduce His Wife in a Mankini? In one of the more bizarre queries, Jorma advises Ray on whether this questionable fashion choice could spice things up at home.Should Talking Istanbullocks Focus More on People in the Pub?** Jorma considers whether the podcast should put more emphasis on its roots in the James Joyce Irish Pub.https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AAdIgn2TbxGSyQgAH4btOs9puTHuRhNwBQb04Aqzbso/edit?usp=sharing#ComedyPodcast #BritishHumour #ListenerQandA #JormaKirkko #SchoolPranks #CarAccidentRevenge #MorganFreeman #BestPubStories #PodcastHumour #RevengePorn83. What the hell is Raw Dogging?
42:19||Ep. 83Welcome back to another sizzling edition of *Talking Istanbullocks*! Ray and Jorma cool each other down in the sweltering Turkish heat as they give you the funniest 45 minutes of your week.1. Introduction & BanterJorma Kirkko and Ray Mac kick off the show with their usual banter, chatting about the week that was, including Jorma's recent adventures in the film world. Between celebrity parties and the fun of the film set, while Ray still eagerly awaits his big break in 'scud flicks'2. Morgan Freedman's Comedy Poem: Raw DoggingYes, you heard it right! Morgan Freeman is back with another hilarious poem, this time at the request of Erling Haaland. The topic? The latest airplane trend – Raw Dogging. It's as absurd as it sounds, and Morgan delivers with his signature style. Written by Iggy Pop, David Bowie and Morgan FreedmanProduced by Jorma Kirkko3. Discussion on Raw Dogging The lads dive deep into the strange world of Raw Dogging. What started as a questionable in-flight activity has now become the topic of a riotous debate. Is it about simplicity, or just madness? 4. True or False Quiz – Olympic EditionGet ready for a special Olympics-themed quiz! Ray and Jorma test each other on some bizarre Olympic trivia, with plenty of laughs along the way. Who will come out on top this time?5. Donald Trump Sketch: Desert Island DramaIn a side-splitting sketch, Donald Trump and his talking dog, Chris, are still stranded on a desert island. But this time, they're visited by the one and only Marjorie Taylor Swift (no, not the pop star). Big news is on the horizon, but will it be enough to get them off the island? And what has Donald been doing without real women to have sex with for the last year and a half?Written and produced by Jorma KirkkoChris The Dog played by Jorma Kirkko6. Post of the WeekWe wrap things up with the Post of the Week, where Ray shares a joke about a duck walking into a pub. The punchline? You'll have to listen to find out!🎙️ Call to Action: Don't forget to subscribe, share, and like the podcast on all platforms. Follow us on YouTube for more behind-the-scenes content, and don't be a silent stalker – join the conversation!💬 Join the Fun: Want to suggest a topic for Morgan Freeman's next poem? Drop us a line, and you might hear your idea brought to life in a future episode.🎧 New Podcast Alert: Be sure to check out *Are You Alright, Hun?*, a warm and heartfelt podcast by Jamie T. Murphy that tackles real-life stories of addiction and mental health. It's a serious, yet hopeful conversation that you won't want to miss.#TalkingIstanbullocks #ComedyPodcast #MorganFreemanParody #RawDoggingTrend #OlympicsTrivia #DonaldTrumpParody #PodcastBanter #CelebritySketches #Britishcomedy #Irishcomedy #JoinTheLaughs #JamieTMurphy #MentalHealthStories #NewPodcastAlert #SubscribeAndLaugh #AreYouAlrightHun #Funny45Minutes #ScudFlicksDreams #DesertIslandDrama #ListenerInteraction #PodcastCommunity #NightClubbingParody #IggyPopCoverhttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZF_07xT2Og3T-d-TpYtdTbRAq2Myx3Qf2GP6uSISGLU/edit?usp=sharingTune in for laughs, absurdity, and maybe even a bit of wisdom (well, maybe)!Presented by Ray Mac and Jorma KirkkoProduced by Jorma Kirkko82. The Sheriff's Rusty Badge - A Poem From A Hollywood Legend
34:16||Ep. 82Segments:Chinese Year of the Istanbullocks/ IntroductionFeatured Publication: Frog Log magazine, the amphibian conservation community’s news source for all your trending amphibian news.What to expectMorgan Freedman Poem: The Rusty Sheriff's BadgeMorgan reads a poem about anuses, humorously titled "The Rusty Sheriff's Badge."True or FalseA fun quiz and banter segment, featuring quirky questions about Madonna's family, black cats and smearing dog poo on Liam Gallagher's DoorComedy SketchSexy celebrity chef Vagella Rickrocks oozes sex appeal and rhubarb compote but faces challenges from her naughty cat, Caroline.Criminal Minds - Psychiatology QuizRay undergoes comedy criminal profiling, adding a humorous twist to the profiling process.Kiss and TellAn amusing reader's letter about a dodgy date is shared and discussed.Post of the WeekA joke sent in by a listener is highlighted and celebrated.Description: "Join us for Episode 82 of Talking Istanbullocks! In this edition, Jorma Kirkko brings you a hilarious and diverse lineup of segments. We kick off with a rude poem by Morgan Freedman where he delights us with a humorously crafted poem, 'The Rusty Sheriff's Badge.'Test your knowledge with our True or False quiz, and enjoy the chaos as celebrity chef Vagella Rickrocks attempts to maintain her sexy, calm veneer while dealing with her mischievous cat, Caroline. Ray undergoes comedy criminal profiling in our Criminal Minds segment, and we share a laugh over a reader's dodgy date story in Kiss and Tell. Finally, we wrap up with the Post of the Week, featuring a joke sent in by one of our listeners.Brought to you by Frog Log magazine, your go-to source for all things amphibian. Despite Ray's absence, we promise you won't even notice he's not there! Tune in for laughs, banter, and a good time."#BritishComedy #ComedyPodcast #MorganFreemanPoem #IrishComedy #TrueOrFalseQuiz #NigellaLawsonParody #CriminalMinds #KissAndTell #PostOfTheWeek #FrogLogMagazineTRANSCRIPThttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1GtdMMAqQJ-gEV8z0RHykguDZIzfUNkC1BQliIypUk-8/edit81. I Had Sex With Over 400 Tractors
44:04||Ep. 81The boys are back in town!1. Welcome and Introduction:Hosts Jorma + Ray, are in their local juicer trying to bribe the staff with used underwear to play the All-Ireland final instead of the Olympics as they are reunited after a month. This week's guest publication is Health and Efficiency, the culture magazine for nudists.2. Thrift Shop by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis (Featuring Joe Biden)Joe Biden's heartfelt rap about his resignation, why Kamala Harris would be a better president than Donald Trump and his love of slippers.3. Celebrity True or False Quiz: Kicking off with Sylvester Stallone the chat soon descends into Ray's love of Milk Maid Magazine and his ambitions to set up a softcore magazine called 'Swank'.4. Honzie's HoroscopesSouth Africa's premier bogus astrolomer delivers horoscopes for Canceleos (July birthdays) as he hasn't been given the budget to do Cancer and Leo separately.Eerily shocking and accurate psychic predictions for the month of July including school closures and why you should avoid Bangladesh this summer holiday5. Listener Engagement:Encouragement for listeners to subscribe, follow, and share our YouTube channel6. Post of The WeekAn intrigung crime story about a man who was sensationally banned from the countryside after being caught 'interfering' with tractors.Additional Notes:Listeners are invited to contribute poems for Morgan Freedman to read.Encouragement to check out the podcast’s YouTube channel for sketches and more comedic content.This show uses AI voices#ComedyPodcast #BritishComedy #IrishComedy #JoeBidenresigns #Banter #IstanbulComedy #Funny #TractorSex #HoroscopePredictions #HealthAnd Efficiency #SuffolkGazzette #HumorAndSatire #MustListenPodcast #ComedyVarietyShowTRANSCRIPT: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1TJ-w22vJ4gTWqM5Myi8gYbfMlRs2M4pK5pJbqN8FKKM/edit?usp=sharingSocial Media:Subscribe on YouTubeFollow and interact on social media platforms for more updates and behind-the-scenes content.80. Southgate Sings The Blues and a Serial Killer Invites You For Dinner
39:59||Ep. 80This week the boys are proud to have a self-penned song by Gareth Southgate, join a serial killer for dinner - but Who's Doing The Dishes? Meanwhile, an Irishman who's had a vasectomy tries to get two lesbians pregnant for a whole year and the lads talk about the pain of losing a pet. Guest Sponsor: Furry Female Magazine.Song: Dry Your Eyes Mate (Gareth Southgate) written and performed by The Streets and Jorma KirkkoSketch: Written by Jamie T. Murphy and Jorma Kirkko. Starring: Jamie T. Murphy, Jorma Kirkko, Joan O'Ruairc, Harold Shipman and Valerie RichardsThis podcast uses AI and may depict certain events that are purely fictitious.#britishcomedy #irishcomedy #comedypodcast #garethsoutgatesong #mikeskinner #who'sdoingthedishesparody #haroldshipmansketch79. Greek Gods and an absent Turkey
52:01||Ep. 79In this sunny summer special, Jorma and Jamie T. Murphy try (more or less successfully) to avoid politics and sport, while Ray, takes a well-earned break. The lads discuss why nobody should be exempt from having the piss taken out of them and probably too much information about removing ball hair from Jamie's mansion and a Venetian Harbour in Crete.HighlightsMorgan Freeman Poem - Canadian WaxingKing Charles discusses hereditary illness with Meghan and Harry (sketch)Tribute to Ray Mac: song about 80's eroticaA Middle England woman gets arrested at a jam-making festival (sketch)Kiss and Tell - Ray and Jorma discuss a dodgy dogging date (reader's letter)Kaiden Stokes The Really Woke Bloke lectures a happy mother on how to bring up her child ethically (sketch)Listen to Jamie's Podcast on Mental Health: https://shows.acast.com/ya-alrite-hunAll sketches and songs/jingles written and produced by Jorma Kirkko. Voices provided by Valerie Richards, Joan O'Ruairc, Duncan Chesley, Jorma KirkkoSpecial thanks to Jamie T. Murphy, Ray Mac, Eamon McAndrew#britishcomedy #irishcomedy #podcast #takingthepiss #JamieTMurphy #YaAlrightHunPodcast78. Politicians Are C*nts: Sunak and Southgate Perform a Farewell Rap
34:14||Ep. 78In today's show special guests, comedy-writer and musician Jamie T. Murphy and bookshop owner, Wally O'Neill talk about how they help people suffering from addictions, mental health and homelessness in their home-town of Wexford, while the politicians do nothing.The pair are launching their own podcast next week, 'Ya alright Hun?' where people tell their real-life stories of mental illness and addiction in their families. Jamie and Wally are chalk and cheese but are both heroes in their community and riveting and hilarious guests.This week's sketch is Gareth Southgate and Rishi Sunak performing Lose Yourself by Eminem.#britishcomedy #irishhumour #redbookswexford #jamietmurphy #wallyoneill #mentalhealthcharity #southgateout #sunakout #comedysong #Eminemripoff
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