Having Fibromyalgia, lung problems and back problems, I really miss who I used to be. There are four things related to my lung problems, Lung Restricted Disease, Acid Reflux, Vocal Cords getting stuck or being Paralyzed and Fibromyalgia which all four problems are working against each other. I will be having my face numbed and a camera inserted in my nose Tuesday at 2pm, to look into the back of my throat. To look at my lungs, my vocal cords and the damage that was done in the back of my throat due to my acid reflux. You are on your own when no one really understands the reality you are facing. That you are scared and terrified even if you don’t show it. No one really cares what you are going through, unless they have something that benefits them. Missing me, I didn’t have a strain of my voice, I wasn’t in and out of the hospital. I didn’t have eight surgeries within the last five years. No one answers their phone unless they want something. You always have to reach out first. No one actually checks on you because they expect you to be strong. Why do you think I disappeared and that I have a small circle? I am tired of giving everything, when I don’t expect anything in return. I came close to dying four times and the three times on the operating table. My heart and breathing stopped, but no one cared. If anyone wants a relationship with me, I won’t give until I am drained. I am too tired to give everything and never get anything in return even though I don’t ask for it. Something has to change, because I am too tired to care or to put in more effort, I am exhausted and done.
","author_name":"Elaina Brady"}