Warning: This episode contains detailed discussion of termination for medical reasons (TFMR), baby loss and pregnancy loss.
To mark Baby Loss Awareness Week, author and former teacher Rosanna Brown joins Julia Samuel to share the story of her son William and her experience of termination for medical reasons (TFMR).
Rosanna was approaching 24 weeks pregnant when she and her husband learnt that William had a condition incompatible with life. She speaks candidly about the trauma of ending a much-wanted pregnancy, the medical procedure itself and the words from a midwife that helped her begin to reframe what had happened: “You didn't choose, you consented to medical advice.”
Rosanna and Julia explore the often hidden grief surrounding TFMR and baby loss, the difference between grief and trauma, and why Rosanna struggled to feel entitled to mourn her son. They also discuss how couples can grieve differently, the role talking therapy played in her recovery and how she and her husband found ways to remember William together.
Rosanna also reflects on pregnancy after loss, becoming a mother again and why another baby can bring enormous joy without replacing the child who died.
Now an advocate for greater awareness of TFMR, Rosanna shares why she wants other parents facing termination for medical reasons to feel less alone, ashamed and silenced.
If you found this conversation helpful:
Listen to Julia's conversation with Geraint John, on losing his wife, navigating grief as a family and learning to rebuild life after loss: Listen here.
You may also enjoy Agony Aunties: How Do You Handle the "Death Admin" While You're Still Grieving?, exploring the emotional and practical challenges of bereavement, and why we need to give ourselves time and support after losing someone we love: Listen here.
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Guest: Rosanna Brown
Producer: Georgie Rutherford
Executive Producer: Emily Leahy
Video Producer: Darren Michael
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